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Surround Yourself with Good People

Together, you’ll all make the world a much more beautiful place. 
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January 29, 2025
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There is a Jewish teaching in Perkei Avot that if you have a bad neighbor, you must move away from them. 

I believe the corollary is also true: You need to surround yourself with good people. Then, you will likely become better yourself. I’ve certainly seen it in terms of my own self-growth. 

As a teen, I had a best friend who urged me to cut class and go to the mall with her. I thought she was cool, so I did. 

In college, I hung out with friends who would binge drink every weekend until they passed out; I did the same.  

One friend encouraged me to shoplift, so I did it; she told me that taking from a corporation was fine. In fact, they deserved it. 

Looking back, I’m ashamed of my behavior. I was young, and atheist, with no set morals or values. 

Now that I view the world through the framework of the Torah, I see how wrong I was. However, I was friends with people who didn’t have any moral clarity either, so I didn’t know right from wrong. 

These days, I’m an observant Jew, surrounded by other Jews dedicated to the Torah and mitzvot. Every day, I see people in my community not only doing the right thing – they go above and beyond for others.  

I have been the recipient of this incredible kindness. I had my third child recently, and I had to undergo a C-section for the first time. 

It. Was. Brutal. I was in terrible pain for the first week, unable to get out of bed and having to completely rely on my thoughtful husband and lovely mother-in-law to take care of me. Thank goodness I had them. My community also stepped up to help.  

Friends and people I’d never met dropped by with dinner every night for a month. Our friends’ daughters made centerpieces and helped decorate for our son’s bris. Local high schoolers showed up to babysit. People came by with bags of clothes, gifts and handmade items. One friend made us a complete Shabbat dinner and lunch two weeks in a row, while another offered to watch my baby during the day so I could work. 

I’m so grateful for the kindness and generosity I’ve experienced. It inspired me to give back to others too.  

When a friend’s mother passed away, I made lunch for her. I hadn’t stepped into the kitchen in over a month because I was recovering, but I wanted my friend to know she had people in her corner in her time of need. 

When one of the teachers at my daughters’ daycare gave birth to her eighth child, God bless her, I brought over a baby gift and a self-care package filled with good-smelling soap and lotion, so she could take her of herself too. 

When a Jewish family I didn’t know experienced a tragedy, I gave a little more tzedaka than I could afford to their GoFundMe page, because I knew they needed it. 

I’m not bringing these things up to pat myself on the back. I’m bringing them up to show the power of doing good, the power of surrounding yourself with people who are actively making the world a better place. The giving attitude is contagious. 

This was something I’d seen in my Jewish community of Pico-Robertson, but not in greater LA. The city didn’t seem to have a community; it felt disjointed, isolating and lonely.  

The city didn’t seem to have a community; it felt disjointed, isolating and lonely. However, in the wake of the LA fires, I’ve completely changed my opinion. 

However, in the wake of the LA fires, I’ve completely changed my opinion. I’ve seen so much good happening over these past few weeks. Donation centers are filled to the brim. People are offering to cook meals for the devastated communities and sheltering pets who don’t have a home. Others risked their own lives to save their neighbors. Just like my Jewish community, they motivated me to give back, to donate to the victims and show up for them when they need our love and support. 

I encourage you: attach yourself to good people. Stay close to them, and you will become better yourself. Together, you’ll all make the world a much more beautiful place.


Kylie Ora Lobell is an award-winning writer and Community Editor of the Jewish Journal. You can find Kylie on X @KylieOraLobell or Instagram @KylieOraWriter.

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