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March 13, 2012

Just a week after Lindsay Lohan’s much-anticipated “Saturday Night Live” appearance, Jonah Hill took the 30 Rock stage and brought a lot of his, umm, old self.

Hill surprised many viewers by showing up with a few extra pounds, making him look like his funny old self again. His monologue featured Tom Hanks, who teased Hill for not winning an Oscar. That was followed by a digital short that involved Hill having a succession of tennis balls shot directly at his crotch (including a special one by John McEnroe).

In another sketch, Hill revived his annoying Jewish kid at Benihana’s shtick, greatly embarrassing his dad (Bill Hader).

Some notable quotes:

To the cook: “I love your showmanship, but please be careful with those knives, you’re giving me flashbacks from my bris! I don’t know if I should clap or cover my schmeckel!”

“Based on what I read on my father’s JDate profile, his hobbies include ‘stretching the truth.’ ”

On taking his dad’s Viagra: “I was just looking for a Flintstones chewable to help me get through a tough Wednesday and I took a Schwartz pill by accident … Let’s just say it made for an interesting day at Hebrew school.”

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