The Real You at Last

You’ve had a life. Celebrate it by ensuring you share it with your friends and family. Only you can set it right. 

Since I wrote my book, “Why Not: Lessons on Comedy, Courage, and Chutzpah,” I’ve received numerous congratulations for writing and publishing it. I express my gratitude to them, and if they are over 50, I encourage them to put down their own story. 

I didn’t set out to write a book for publication; I began writing it for my family and friends. I wanted them to have a glimpse of who Mark Schiff was, who my parents were, what my childhood was like and what my marriage was like. I intended to leave them with my footprint — as an act of love. Acts of love can take you very far. When I reach 120, and God lifts me from this world, I want people to have something more than just their memory of who Mark was.

One person, after showing me a memoir their dad left, hugged, and kissed the book to their chest. When the funeral and shiva are over, having something tangible beyond memories is comforting. 

I’ve attended funerals and shivas where people share funny, sad, and heartfelt stories about their loved ones. Some of them had written material left behind, and I witnessed how valuable that was to the families. One person, after showing me a memoir their dad left, hugged, and kissed the book to their chest. When the funeral and shiva are over, having something tangible beyond memories is comforting. I wish I had a book left to me by my parents and grandparents. Don’t you wish the same?

When I encourage others to write their life stories, I often hear responses like, “I’m not a writer,” or “My life is boring, unlike yours.” One person even said, “Arnold Schwarzenegger had an interesting life, but I don’t.” Yes, Arnold has had an interesting life, but would you want his life? Would you want to confess to your spouse that you had a love child with the cleaning lady? It may sell books, but it’s not a life most would envy. Regina Brett wisely remarked, “If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.”

I agree that writing a book can be daunting, and not everyone is willing to invest the time and effort. I understand. However, welcome to the digital age and the solution: Tape your life on your iPhone, iPad, or computer. Then, secure it on an external hard drive or Dropbox. You can do it as a video (which I recommend) or as audio, like a book on tape. All you need is someone to sit and ask you questions. 

You’ll be surprised how much you enjoy this project. You’ll recall details about your life that were tucked away and would have remained so if not for this endeavor. Plus, you don’t have to include anything you’d rather keep private. Be as truthful as possible, and if you have second thoughts about something you said, it can be easily edited out. If you have a spouse, have them record you, and then record them. You can complete the entire process in a few weeks, and you’ll never regret it.

Biographies are among the most popular books. Why not have them listen to your life story and understand why you are who you are? There is no life that isn’t interesting. As someone once said, “If you had a childhood, then you have a story.” You are the sperm cell that triumphed over millions of others, fighting relentlessly to get here. You have a story, so make sure you tell it.

If you have a family, I believe you owe it to them to capture your life on video or audio. It’s a selfless act. People leave behind money, houses, and cars, some even lots of bills but rarely, if ever, do they leave behind the opportunity to hear the real story — the real you right from the horse’s mouth. This is your chance to linger in their hearts in a way that was never possible before. 

But first order a copy of my book “Why Not Lessons on Comedy, Courage, and Chutzpah.” Because even though I’ve not had a love child with my cleaning lady or yours, I have had an interesting life.

Mark Schiff is a comedian, actor and writer, and host of the ‘You Don’t Know Schiff’ podcast. His new book is “Why Not? Lessons on Comedy, Courage and Chutzpah.”