This summer, our son suffered an injury to his face. He is completely fine, thanks to his wonderful counselors, doctors, and especially due to his fantastic surgeon. Shout out to Dr. Applebaum.
We learned many lessons through the process, but one that stays with me—repairs might reopen.
We were warned that while he was heavily stitched to continue to exercise caution.
Because over a period of time, as the repair was fragile, reopening and dare I say, infection was more than possible.
But maybe stitches are easier to care for than relationships. Zach’s wound stayed closed, but think about the fragile relationships we encounter. We apologize, they apologize, and while we may think we’ve been given and gifted blank slates, history and hurt and memories of what they did and what you did try to infect the patches we have placed over our hearts.
Teshuvah means return but doesn’t necessarily mean a return to the very same place we started. Teshuvah might invite returning to different emotional beginnings with the same person over a long stretch of time. One day, things seem perfect. Another day, it feels like we’re walking on eggshells. The stitches aren’t always perfectly attached. This means, just like a surgeon, we must meticulously inspect the ties that hold us to our loved ones, over and over again.
Wounds reopen; repair is sometimes never really over.
This is why Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur come back every year. To remind us—pour over your relationships. Reinforce the repairs. Check them again and then and check them once more; returning not to the very start of our relationships, but perhaps returning to a place of renewed respect, substantial growth, a deep sense of love.
Happy Elul and Shabbat Shalom
Rabbi Nicole Guzik is senior rabbi at Sinai Temple. She can be reached at her Facebook page at Rabbi Nicole Guzik or on Instagram @rabbiguzik. For more writings, visit Rabbi Guzik’s blog section from Sinai Temple’s website.
