Just Kindness

I remember the first time I received a text message asking me to pray on behalf of a boy named Daniel, whose name I have changed to protect his family’s privacy. Daniel was battling a serious illness and though I did not know him, I prayed each day for him and his family, who live in Los Angeles. 

I prayed for Daniel every morning and before I fell asleep at night. I prayed for him as soon as I recited a blessing and lit Shabbat candles each Friday night. For months, Jewish communities around the world recited prayers, including Tehillim (Psalms) and performed mitzvot in honor of his recovery. 

Tragically, Daniel passed away last year. I spoke with those who knew this special boy and his family, and they attested that Daniel always strived to be happy, resilient, and connected to G-d, even during his illness. In short, Daniel was like a ray of light; a rainbow bursting forth with energy and joy. 

In a Jewish community as warm and supportive as the one we are blessed to know in West Los Angeles, no family celebrates a joyful milestone alone. Conversely, no family should struggle with illness or grief alone. I want to tell the story of a community that offered Daniel and his family a world of love and support.

Daniel was admitted to Children’s Hospital Los Angeles (CHLA), where staff and volunteers from Chai Lifeline and Chabad of Greater Los Feliz offered tremendous support to him and his family. 

Chai Lifeline is a remarkable nonprofit that offers emotional support to Jewish families experiencing illness, whether a sick parent or a child, or loss, according to Malka Lipovenko, director of volunteers. The organization offers programs and services to support the whole family, including meals at hospitals or at home and gifts and activities, and it is all provided free of charge. The beauty of Chai Lifeline is that it anticipates a family’s needs before they arrive at a hospital. Daniel’s mother told me that she “didn’t even have the words” to describe her gratitude for Chai Lifeline. 

A Home Away from Home

Jewish organizations that support families battling illness have a special place in my heart. Their staff truly hold families’ hands in ways that they need through their journey — discreetly and lovingly.  

The staff at Chabad of Greater Los Feliz, which is a five-minute walk from CHLA, also went above and beyond to help Daniel and his family feel more comfortable whenever possible, closer to home. 

This Chabad house, run by director Rabbi Leibel Korf and his wife, Dvonye, hosted a grand opening of its newly-renovated center on Dec. 8, and it utilizes its vicinity to CHLA to help many Jewish families whose children are hospitalized there. The renovated Chabad house also includes an apartment with two rooms and a lounge area that is available to those who need to stay close to the hospital, whether during Shabbat or the rest of the week. Friends of Mendy and Hadassah Spalter and Daniel and Rachel Benmoshe sponsored two bedrooms in the new hospitality area, one in the memory of the Spalters’ late daughter, Chaya, and the other in the memory of Benmoshes’ late son, Avraham, who both stayed at CHLA.

Chabad of Greater Los Feliz offers company to patients and families at CHLA, and also provides homemade food and Shabbat meals, and prayer services (this is particularly vital for parents and relatives who wish to stay with their children at CHLA over Shabbat). 

With regard to Daniel’s parents, Rabbi Mendy Ceitlin, assistant rabbi at Chabad of Greater Los Feliz, told me that he viewed Chabad’s role as “just a way to be there in support of the family.” Giving is second-nature to Chabad, and Rabbi Ceitlin recalled the time he brought a box of chocolates to a sick child at CHLA and watched his eyes as they lit up. “From then on, he called me ‘The Chocolate Rabbi,’” Ceitlin remembered fondly.

“From then on, he called me ‘The Chocolate Rabbi,’” Ceitlin remembered fondly.

In general, Rabbi Ceitlin and other devoted staff at Chabad of Greater Los Feliz “try to offer anything to families [at CHLA] that they miss while being away from home,” he said. What a profoundly beautiful endeavor, and a very Jewish one, at that. Whether through visitations, breakfasts, meals, or even coffee runs, this special Chabad house “tries to be there for whatever families need,” noted Rabbi Ceitlin. 

“Chabad was amazing,” said Daniel’s mother. “They brought gifts and visited every day. They were always looking for ways to make him happy. You can’t imagine the comfort they brought, and without any judgment. It was just kindness.”

“Chabad was amazing. They brought gifts and visited every day. They were always looking for ways to make him happy. You can’t imagine the comfort they brought, and without any judgment. It was just kindness.”

Rabbi Ceitlin spoke with an air of modesty that made it seem as though he and others at Chabad didn’t think twice about devoting themselves to Jewish patients and their families at CHLA. In my experience, the best “mitzvah-doers” are the ones who offer extraordinary help, but never demand the credit they indubitably deserve. 

Though I pray that we may always be blessed with health, sharp mental faculties, and skilled and intuitive medical professionals, it’s still comforting to know that there are those in our wonderful Jewish community who will always reach out with a hand, a hug, a warm meal, or even a small box of chocolates.

Tabby Refael is an award-winning writer, speaker and weekly columnist for The Jewish Journal of Greater Los Angeles. Follow her on X and Instagram @TabbyRefael.