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A Moment in Time: “Are You Here with Your Wife?” (Shopkeeper to me)

It's amazing how truth opens doors of possibilities.
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July 14, 2023

Dear all,

I share the following interaction from my recent trip to Israel:

“Are you here with your wife?”

Yes, that’s what the orthodox shopkeeper asked as I perused her store in the Jewish Quarter of the Old City of Jerusalem.

Even now, 27 years post my official “coming out,” I still pause before responding.

Should my answer be any different whether I am in West Hollywood, Dallas, Kuala Lumpur, or Jerusalem?

Should my answer be any different whether I am speaking to a religious or a secular person?

Should my answer be any different if I am alone or with a group?

Yes – these thoughts continue to stir.

But in this particular moment in time, I took a deep breath and shared:

“I’m here with my husband.”

“Oh,” she continued, “Please invite him in, as it’s always better to shop as a couple!”

I left her shop with a smile rather than a sense of conflict. It’s amazing how truth opens doors of possibilities.

With love and shalom,

Rabbi Zach Shapiro

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