Singles/Other Side of the Hill: A Personal Ad Story

Dear Editor:

I was divorced in 1993 after an 18-year marriage and spent several years getting my head on straight. I then began to advertise in the The Jewish Journal Personal Connections because I wanted to find a kindred spirit. I met many women who, by and large, were well-educated, accomplished, lovely women. For about a year, I dated one lady who was a lawyer and then a woman who was quite an accomplished educator. Both were very nice women, but not the best fit.

I kept at it and finally responded to an ad placed by a doctor who lived “on the other side of the hill” from me. I was living in Santa Monica, and she in Westlake Village. We would never have met except for The Jewish Journal.

One night in April 1998, I called The Jewish Journal Personal Connections phone line and just listened to the taped verbal introductions of the women who had run ads. Listening to voices seemed to give me more information than the written ads. I was attracted to Lorie’s message. There was a soft, feminine quality about her voice and I was pleased that she was actively getting on with her life even without a mate. She talked about her two children, her ski trips with them, her home and her love of tennis, painting and bicycling.

Within a week we met for dinner at a restaurant in Malibu, which at the time I thought was halfway to Westlake Village, where she lived. I remember the night vividly. I tried to be restrained and not too forward, but I was on a mission and wanted a lot of information. My dating experience had taught me to be accepting and look for the best in every woman. I had also learned not to linger in a relationship if the fit was not a good one. We were about 30 minutes into the conversation when I looked at Lorie and realized what an exceptionally nice lady was sitting in front of me. Before she returned home after a lovely dinner with red wine, we kissed.

Then we kissed a second time.

I drove to Westlake Village many times in the subsequent weeks to meet Lorie. She was concerned about the distance, but I told her — truthfully — that no distance was too far to drive to see her. She would also share in the driving by coming to the “other side of the mountain.”

A few weeks after our first date, I was exclusively dating Lorie. I soon had the privilege of meeting her children. I brought magazines and candy when I first met them, and Lorie’s son Michael told her, “Mom, you are going to marry Fred.”

We married eight months later on Dec. 20. We now have a blended family of five children: Adina, 22; Ari, 20; Abby, 16; Rachel, 15, and Michael, 14. We are a happy Jewish family thanks to The Jewish Journal Personal Connections.

During the time that I was responding to the ads, there were times that I wanted to give up because the process of meeting people could be hard. I was disappointed many times and I could see that at times the women were disappointed with me. However, I kept at it and now am enjoying the rewards of my effort and the opportunity provided by The Jewish Journal.

Oddly enough, my new wife’s favorite song since adolescence has been an old song by Tommy Edwards from his album “It’s all in the Game” titled “The Morning Side of the Mountain”:

“There was a girl; there was a boy,

If they had met they might have found a world of joy.

But she lived on the morning side of the mountain,

And he lived on the twilight side of the hill…”

Without the personal ads of The Jewish Journal I would have never met Lorie and the mitzvah that we have together, and with our children, would have never happened. With the help of The Jewish Journal, we were able to find each other even on “the other side of the hill.”

Thank you,

Fred Morguelan, Ph. D.

Westlake Village

Fred Morguelan is still reading the Journal, but not the Personals.