Unpacking Social Media

These days, we often judge each other by how many likes, comments and social media followers we have. We think: Someone is blowing up on TikTok? They must be amazingly talented. Someone always gets comments on their Instagram photos? They’re worth checking out. 

For most of us, when we post our own thoughts and photos and videos and links, not much happens. We may get a like here and there and a comment or two, but it can seem like we’re shouting into the void. If others can become internet famous, why can’t we? What are we doing wrong? 

I follow many influencers online. Some of them genuinely deserve the huge followings they have. They are talented. They have something fresh and new to say. You can tell that they are devoted to their craft; they have principles and they’re sticking to them. They rise above the noise.

But many of the “influencers” are mostly just that: noise. They’re just good marketers. They’re excellent at playing the social media game. Behind that high follower count and all that engagement, there might not be that much substance. What they have today is going to be gone tomorrow. Remember all the Vine stars from back in the day? All the people with MySpace followings? Some of these people might be able to transition into a real career, but most of them will not. 

I’m someone who often gets frustrated by the social media machine. I don’t have a huge Twitter following because I don’t get into fights with strangers over politics; I’m old fashioned and prefer to keep my political views to myself. I also don’t like hurting people’s feelings. 

I don’t have the greatest following on Instagram because I don’t do my makeup professionally every day or know how to use filters or take photos of myself wearing designer clothing – as if Macy’s counts as designer clothing. 

And I don’t have a following on TikTok because I don’t have TikTok. I don’t want that spyware in my phone. I also think the amount of likes people get there is often made up. But that’s just my speculation. 

I try not to let my lack of followers get me down, though. I’m too busy focusing on my craft and my personal life to become obsessed with social media. If I were to post all the time, I’d have to be on social media constantly, which I believe is unhealthy. I’ve noticed in the past that once I receive a little bit of attention, I just want more and more of it. I feel high when I get it – and depressed when I don’t. 

Back before social media, you could gain attention by being great at what you do. If Joan Didion were just coming up today, would anyone notice her? I doubt she’d be on Twitter. How about David Sedaris? Or other great writers? It seems that today, the people with the best marketing skills would win out. Today, I bet we’re missing out on a lot of talented people because we dismiss them for not being huge online.

If you’re struggling with social media, frustrated by the lack of traction you’re getting or may even be confused by it, here’s my advice: Don’t worry about it. 

If you’re struggling with social media, frustrated by the lack of traction you’re getting or may even be confused by it, here’s my advice: Don’t worry about it. There are plenty of other ways you can shine. This is rarely talked about, but email marketing can actually be much more effective than social media marketing. Anyone can build an email list and start promoting themselves that way.  

Here’s another piece of advice: Don’t be jealous of the people with big followings. That isn’t easy, either. They may find it difficult to disconnect, to socialize with people in real life, or, like me, get upset when they aren’t getting the kind of engagement they’d hoped for. Just because someone is smiling and looks happy on social media, it doesn’t mean they are in real life. They’re only presenting one side of themselves to the world, and they could well be struggling underneath it all.

The average person should use social media for fun, as a way to connect with friends and family and fun people, and to socialize, which is why it was created in the first place. Don’t get caught up in the noise. Rise above it instead. 

Don’t find me on social media. Email me instead! KylieOl@JewishJournal.com.

Kylie Ora Lobell is the Community Editor of the Jewish Journal.