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We Need Policy and Change—And Thoughts and Prayers, Too

[additional-authors]
May 26, 2022
Nataliia Prokopenko/Getty Images

In recent years, in the aftermath of mass shootings in the United States, people have attacked the phrase “thoughts and prayers.” Their argument is valid when it comes to politicians: Our elected officials are often all talk and no action, and many of them say what they have to so they can retain their power. Too many of them don’t actually care about us and our safety. They’d rather just climb the ladder in Washington and use us to do it.

However, that’s not a reason to go after the notion of thinking about and praying for the victims and their families. Thoughts and prayers need to be coupled with policy and change. They can work hand in hand.

When I hear about a horrific event, I’m shocked. I immediately think about everyone involved, and how horrible they must be feeling at that time. I pray for them. I pray to God that they can find some healing during this heartbreaking time.

If something terrible happens to someone I know, I reach out to them and ask if they need anything. That could be a meal or simply a text asking them how they’re doing. I want them to know that I’m thinking about them. That they are not alone. Grieving is awful, and feeling like you’re the only one going through it, and that no one is there for you makes it so much worse.

If I don’t know the person who is going through this experience, the actions I take will vary. Sometimes I’ll donate to a cause. I may speak out about this incident online to encourage others to step up. I’ll hold a door open for a stranger, wish somebody a “good day” or hold my children tighter. All of this can contribute to a better world. I strive to be better in the face of tragedy, in the face of evil.

Learning to rely on prayer and put my faith in God has kept me sane and made my life worth living. When people are hurting or sick, prayer helps.

As an observant Jew, I absolutely believe in the power of prayer. Learning to rely on prayer and put my faith in God has kept me sane and made my life worth living. When people are hurting or sick, prayer helps.

I totally understand the impulse to not believe in God when these things happen, and to think that thoughts and prayers are utter nonsense. I used to be an atheist. My main reason was because if there was a God, bad things wouldn’t happen in the world. Judaism has shown me that the answer to that argument is much more complex. We just don’t know why things happen the way they do.

And just because I’m observant now, don’t brush me off. When I hear about tragedies, I get mad at God. I cry out to Him. I question Him. Eventually, I just have to trust that God knows what He’s doing and there’s no way human beings will ever be able to understand.

Judaism is a religion of doing: We aren’t supposed to stand by when others are suffering. We are supposed to provide food for the sick and the needy, protect the widow and the orphan and call out injustices. We must make necessary change happen to create a more peaceful world.

I don’t know what it’s going to take to make these mass killings stop. But what I do know is that I am not powerless—and neither are you.

During this time, do what you can to make the world a more loving and just place, whether it means calling your local congressperson or peacefully protesting or being kind to your neighbor or volunteering at your local food bank.

And let the victims and their families know you are thinking about them and praying for them as well. We need to show them we are there for them. They are not alone. They will not be forgotten.

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