On the Evolution of the “Jewish American Princess”

March is Women’s History Month, providing an opportunity to reflect on the many accomplishments of women over the past century. In considering the history of Jewish-American women in particular, it’s useful to note the stereotypes of these women that have often materialized in art, film and literature. Whether it’s the overbearing Jewish mother or the pejorative “Jewish American Princess”—often less lovingly referred to as “JAP”—being stereotyped seemed to come with Jewish womanhood in America. But the “Jewish American Princess” has evolved over the decades, and for that reason deserves reappraisal.

Many say that the concept of a spoiled, rich girl of Jewish descent holding out for a good marriage first entered the American cultural consciousness with Herman Wouk’s 1955 novel “Marjorie Morningstar.” The original term for a materialistic, young Jewish woman bred by indulgent parents who’d experienced rapid upward mobility was “a Shirley,” first sneered by Gene Kelly as Marjorie’s artistic (broke) love interest in the film version of the story. While the book and film differ, both seemed to imply how injurious Jewish parents’ priorities were to their daughters’ decision-making, to girls pursuing their own paths to maturation. Daughters seemed resigned to obeying their parents’ desires rather than pursuing their own.

The image of the indulged, vain Jewish girl was further expanded in Philip Roth’s 1959 novella “Goodbye Columbus” with the character of Brenda Patimkin. Both works suggest that these entitled daughters weren’t born that way. They were instead bred to be this way by another cliché of the ’60s-’80s, the indulgent, nouveau riche, adoring Jewish daddy, played to the hilt by Everett Sloan in the movie version of “Marjorie Morningstar”; by Jack Klugman in the screen version of “Goodbye, Columbus”; by Sam Wanamaker in the comedy film “Private Benjamin” (1980); and made indelible by Jerry Orbach in “Dirty Dancing” (1987).

Similarly, with Goldie Hawn as “Private Benjamin” and Jennifer Grey as “Baby” in “Dirty Dancing,” infantilized girls eventually wrench themselves from their controlling fathers’ favor and values as they evolve into wholesome compassion and healthy class consciousness. The implication is that it was actually those nouveau riche Jewish-American kings, slaving away in their own struggling businesses, defying the hard times of their youth, who, with the encouragement of their wives, turned their assimilated sugar daughters into display cases of prosperity.

Straightening their teeth, noses and hair in pricy procedures, Jewish daddies prepared their darlings to attract and marry Jewish men of as many letters and dollars as possible. Daughters were encouraged by their negatively depicted Jewish mothers to have a sham career as a means to secure a husband. That career, of course, was to be dropped like a hot potato knish in order to beget grandchildren as quickly as possible before, God forbid, somebody died.

In 1982 I remember being gifted with the novelty book “The Jewish American Princess Handbook,” which takes affectionate ownership of all cultural cliches prior to publication and presents these petulant prisoners of indulgence for popular consumption. The book, created by two Jewish women, pulls together apt photos and stories derived from the burgeoning tristate Jewish culture of Connecticut, New Jersey and New York, and especially the Long Island suburbs. And they do so to great comic effect.

“We’re not spoiled, just selective,” is the book’s defiant declaration, as it highlights the specific choices of habitat, jewelry, wardrobe and boyfriends of young Jewish women and their families.

But the indulgences young “JAPs” relished in their innocence have been exceeded by non-Jewish women. When Madonna sang her shameless hit songs “Material Girl” and “Like a Virgin” in 1984, the audacity of a young woman feeling that good about her body, sexuality and adornments came to brazen prominence. As the new millennium came upon us, so did Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, Gwyneth Paltrow, Ivanka Trump and other daddy’s little rich girls who disdained humility and modesty in their vanity and entitlement.

And since the 2014 cancellation of “Princesses: Long Island,” the cruel Bravo reality show depicting Long Island’s Jewish “princesses” as hateful harridans, the negative taint of  the term “princesses” has shifted. In terms of pampered, privileged young women, the Kardashians and Jenners have inspired new coinages of special “princesses,” as have the fictitious Featheringtons of the hit show “Bridgerton,” created by Shonda (not Jewish) Rhimes. The audacious, self-confident influencers of today including Beyoncé, Cardi B, Megan Thee Stallion, Lizzo and others show little need for big daddies.

I posit that these current, confident queens, as well as the many stellar drag queens, owe a debt of thanks to the confidence of Jewish American Princesses of yore.

I posit that these current, confident queens, as well as the many stellar drag queens, owe a debt of thanks to the confidence of Jewish American Princesses of yore. Proudly Jewish women of this century like Tiffany Haddish (“Blackmitzfah”), Amy Shumer (“Snatched” costarring Goldie Hawn as her Jewish mother), Lena Dunham (“Girls”), Rachel Bloom of “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend” (in her “Jap Rap Battle”), and Ilana Glazer (“Broad City”) have forged distinctive new versions of Jewish women today.

More recently, strong, solo Jewish mothers, such as the one played by Tovah Feldshuh in “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend,” have drowned out the babying Jewish daddies of yore. Recent attempts to reclaim the “JAP” designation of the 1960s through late ’80s seem off the mark, as these modern girls are street smart, independent, unprotected and unreservedly sexual—so different an iteration of the “JAP” as to seem unrelated to the princesses of my youth.

Confident, self-realized women of all faiths and hues are now celebrated. Those prior princesses, whom I envied in my underprivileged youth, have evolved into the socially conscious, highly confident Jewish women of today.

As leaders in the arts (Annie Liebowitz, Fran Liebowitz), in law (RBG, Elena Kagan), in science (Vera Rubin who discovered “dark matter”; Rosalind Franklin who revealed the molecular structures of DNA), and in politics (Bella Abzug, Dianne Feinstein), they are exceptionally intelligent, philanthropic, humane and self-confident, never to be mistaken for any show-off daddy’s girls.

Once demeaned, the Jewish American Princesses of my childhood initiated a positive paradigm shift for young females everywhere. Once oppressed and silenced by a culture that privileges the experiences and opinions of men, women universally see the necessity of thriving, independent of the approval and support of men.

And the pendulum has yet to come to rest.