The GOP Convention this July will indeed be a reality show.
Contenders Ted Cruz and John Kasich are being cold shouldered and denied speaking spots because of their refusal to adopt Chris Christie’s prone position in support of Despicable Donald.
On the other hand, sports luminaries, appealing to geriatric white male baby boomers will predominate.
Here’s the lineup:
• Mike Ditka, the great Chicago Bear defensive player and head coach with social views to the right of Attila the Hun.
• Kurt Schilling, the Boston Red Sox pitcher who, rumor has it, sold his soul to the devil to finally beat the Damn Yankees.
• Mike Tyson who will speak in favor of a new Equal Rights Amendment empowering convicted rapists like himself.
• Bobby Knight, the legendary Indiana basketball coach, noted for throwing chairs and punching out players.
As to Iron Mike Tyson, Trump’s secret weapon to win over the women’s vote, The Donald said: “Mike endorsed me, I love it. You know, all the tough guys endorse me. I like that.”
A truly murderers’ row of strapping jock superheroes, all of whom eat “the Breakfast of Champions” together with a Silver One A Day every morning.
Trump’s own athletic prowess dates back to playing squash during his college years for which he claimed a Vietnam War deferment for an injury that miraculously disappeared when the bullets stopped flying.
Clint Eastwood, who spoke in 20012 in behalf of Mitt Romney, move over. This year’s GOP Convention will nominate and star a real American hero.
