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Home Authors Articles by Marcus J Freed

Marcus J Freed

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54 ARTICLES 0 COMMENTS

Satirical Semite: The Right to Freed Speech

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It is in celebration of Passover, the festival of freedom, that we can enjoy the free speech that is afforded to every American.

Satirical Semite: A Republican-Democrat Love Story

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My friend Jonny 8-Vax is in trouble. He avoided getting COVID due to his eight vaccines, but succumbed to something far worse. Jonny fell in love with a Democrat.

Escape from Kyiv, Arrive in Los Angeles

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How one woman’s life turned upside down in less than two weeks. She heard bombing near her apartment in Kiev, escaped across the border at night, traveled through three more countries, and is currently in Los Angeles.

Satirical Semite: Misinformation Nation

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We are living in The Age of Misinformation, and newspapers never include the words “fact checked” below an article, because the assumption is that it is true at the time of writing.

Satirical Semite: Dating Roundup

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“Dating Roundup” is an ambiguous term, since dating is the pursuit of romantic fulfillment, while Roundup is a toxic soul-destroying poison.

Satirical Semite: 2022 Survival Guide

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2022 promises to be a good year. For a start, there are going to be a lot of 2s in it.

Satirical Semite: Conspiracy Theory

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A friend’s Instagram story showed the words “Delta” and “Omicron” can be rearranged to spell “Media Control” (seriously, try it).

Satirical Semite: My Crazy Ex-Wife

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I don’t like to speak ill of the dead, but it’s not applicable with my ex-wife Victoria because she is one of the undead. The other reason usual rules don’t apply is because Vicky is imaginary and never existed.

Does Jewface Exist?

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A mild controversy began in 2019 with the UK premiere of the Tony-winning musical “Falsettos,” whose opening number is “Four Jews in a Room Bitching.

Satirical Semite: The Tale of Jonny 5-Vax

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I bumped into an old friend who had done something radical. It had nothing to do with him having received five different vaccinations.

Serious Semite: The Grinch That Stole Halloween

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Maybe there should be a Grinch to steal Halloween. I still don’t understand its appeal.

Satirical Semite: Homecoming

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Life may have changed, but it’s still one of the most exciting places on the planet, and I’m just grateful to have that visa.

Satirical Semite: Shoot Me Up, Scotty

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The Delta variant is out of control and has 300 times the viral load of the original coronavirus strain.

Satirical Semite: Fighting Season

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As King Solomon said, there is a season for everything. Weather is an important factor in our decision-making process, since we live on a speck of earth spinning around a flaming hot ball.

Satirical Semite: Corona Hangover

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Despite immunization, I still spent six days in bed with a cough that was so intense I nearly evacuated my guts.
No Regrets

Satirical Semite: No Regrets

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This column was nearly called “Reflections On Meeting Ex-Girlfriends After 15 Years, Seeing Their Husband And Kids And Thinking About What Might Have Been.”

Satirical Semite: American Exceptionalism

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A lover of England is an Anglophile. A lover of France is a Francophile. A lover of America is an Americanophile, which sounds like it has one too many syllables, although America does most things big and better, even when it comes to linguistics.

Satirical Semite: Reality Olympics

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“Love Island” is the reverse of the traditional Jewish approach to dating.

Satirical Semite: Shrinking Violets

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The dating pool is shrinking since we are currently seeing a mad rush of post-lockdown weddings.

Satirical Semite: Roman Holiday

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The people of England are good losers. In fact, we are such great losers that it is a national art form.

Satirical Semite: How to Pull off a Pulitzer

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Was it possible to be creative and productive during lockdown despite the madness?

Satirical Semite: Cows, Contentment and Casting Couches

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Is it possible to be happy outside of Los Angeles, City of Dreams?

Satirical Semite: Zoom Through Speed Dates

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I signed up for a Sunday night speed dating event via Zoom because I had temporarily forgotten why I dislike such experiences.

Serious Semite: Politics, Pariahs and Palestinians

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There is a growing sense of antisemitism permeating Britain in response to the current conflict in Israel.

The Great Debate: Is Yoga Kosher?

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My answer has always been an enthusiastic “yes!”—but context is important.

Satirical Semite: Plastic Fantastic

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Many people find it challenging to reveal their faces once again and see the bare faces of others, having become used to the fear of catching the virus.

Satirical Semite: The Battle of Josh and Other Good News

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Josh Swain left the day with a title, which is more than can be said for Meghan’s son Archie.

Satirical Semite: Ministry of Hugs

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There are recommended guidelines around whom we can hug, how we can hug and where we can hug.

Satirical Semite: Shopping for the Apocalypse

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COVID-19 has forced many people to reconsider their career choices.

Satirical Semite: Home Comforts

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There are some upsides to being stuck in the United Kingdom.
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