In our new morning routine, I play the role of Henry’s teacher from 8:30-9:30 a.m. We color, build, garden, learn letters and do puzzles. In a way, this hour serves as my respite from the outside world. For a few minutes, his silly mannerisms and eagerness helps me gain hope and faith in what’s to come. We all need a little push to begin our day and he nudges me in the right direction.
As Henry was coloring recently, I said something about his picture. I honestly don’t remember what I said. But he looked at me and exclaimed, “That’s exactly what Grandma says!”
I smiled and responded, “You’re right. I am turning into Grandma.”
Jokingly, many of us kid around when we say we are turning into our parents. We groan as we hear ourselves saying, “Do this because … I told you so!” or “You’ll understand when you’re older” or “Your face is going to freeze like that.” But when Henry told me I sound like my mother, I felt incredibly lucky and blessed.
If I sound like my mother, it means I sound like a woman who gives her entire being to her family and students, never wavering in the amount of energy she expends on both. If I sound like my mother, it means I sound like a woman who finds ways to volunteer at domestic violence shelters while putting on Sisterhood Kiddush lunches. If I sound like my mother, I sound like a woman who my children (and one day, grandchildren) will know has a heart that solely beats for them.
If I sound like my mother, then I think I will have succeeded in becoming the mom and professional I strive to be.
Bereshit Rabbah reminds us that all the days of her life, Sarah would keep her tent open, filled with a boundless light. When she died, the tent doors closed and the light disappeared. But when Isaac married Rebecca, the doors opened and the light returned. It was as if Sarah’s memory inspired Isaac and Rebecca to live their lives as she would, filled with a sense of hospitality, embrace and love.
It is often a mother (or parent) who inspires us to be the best version of ourselves. Their examples, role modeling and guiding words propel us into the person that stares back at us in the mirror. Sometimes it takes a 4-year-old to remind us how much influence our mothers have on the ways in which we exist in this world.
Mom, you inspire me in more ways than you will ever know. I love you.
