My Existence as Transgender and Jewish is not an Oxymoron

‘Modeh ani’ (I give thanks) are the first words I utter in the morning. I am as Jewish as you. I should not be forced out of synagogues because I am transgender.

In 2014, I began to transition from female to male. I attended a secular Australian high school where I fought both to use my bathroom of choice and to wear a kippah. I was the first transgender person to attend my high school. I pushed them to join organizations such as the Safe Schools Coalition, committed to providing a safe education to LGBT students. When medical transition laws relaxed in 2017, allowing transitioning for people aged 16 and over, I became one of the first to do so in South Australia. I have been fighting for my existence within the secular world since I was 13.

I do not want to fight for my existence within the Jewish community, too.

Rabbi Kalman Topp, a senior rabbi at Beth Jacob states that “a [transgender person] is first and foremost a human being who must be treated with dignity, respect, and sensitivity. The way I see it is that the Torah is both Torat emet – a Torah of truth converged through laws and values, as well as Torat chesed —  a Torah filled with compassion.”

However, when I transitioned as a teenager, my Jewishness was ripped away from me because my Jewish community could not accept that I was transgender.

However, when I transitioned as a teenager, my Jewishness was ripped away from me because my Jewish community could not accept that I was transgender. I should not still be fighting for my acceptance within synagogues six years later.

In February 2020 I moved from the United Kingdom to Australia. I belonged to a liberal Jewish synagogue, a community chosen not because they aligned with my religious values, but because it was the only community where, as a transgender person, I was accepted.

It is undeniable that Orthodox Judaism is making strides on LGBT acceptance, with Britain’s Chief Rabbi Ephraim Mirvis publishing the first guide for Orthodox Jewish schools to improve the wellbeing of LGBT students. However, my acceptance within Orthodox synagogues is the exception, not the rule. In my liberal synagogue, I knew that my past would not be met with scrutiny and intolerance.

I should not be forced into liberal or Reform Judaism because I am transgender. Orthodoxy must make strides to accept me as a man. The voice I pray with is one of a man. The soul I thank HaShem for returning to me every morning is one of a man. The body I lay tefillin on every day is one of a man. The statement of “just join a Reform synagogue” is not enough. Reform Judaism has a fundamentally different approach to Torah than Orthodox Judaism and isn’t free of transphobia either. If you want Jews to live a meaningful Jewish life, the answer is not telling them they don’t belong in your synagogue. Forcing transgender Jews to follow Reform Judaism’s different approach to Torah or abandon Judaism altogether is nothing short of transphobia.

One of the top leaders of the modern Orthodox movement, Dr Tzvi Hersh Weinreb, said that nobody should reject a Jew from a religious congregation or community because they are transgender and should be encouraged to “remain within the fold of observant Judaism.” However, most transgender Jews are forced to leave Orthodoxy after coming out due to transphobia from both the rabbinical powers and their congregation.

Rabbis such as Jeffery Fox, the head of Yeshivat Maharat, a religious seminary for Orthodox women and Weinreb agree that with 41% of transgender people attempting suicide, the commandment of pikuach nefesh — saving a human life —supersedes any restrictions against cross-dressing, hormonal replacement therapy, and gender affirmation surgery. Jewish law permits gender transitioning because gender transitioning saves lives.

Rabbi Idan Ben Efraim states in Dor Tahapuchot (A Generation of Perversions) that transgender people should dress as the gender we present as, sit in the section we present as and should be treated as the gender we present as. The Orthodox community needs more rabbis accepting of transgender Jews so we are not forced into secularism by transphobia.

Transgender Jews are not asking rabbis’ permission to transition. We are asking for acceptance of our transition.