June 15, 2019

Family

"Welcome to Gen Z dating. Educators say the current generation in college is uniquely bad at romance. Online dating has created a (false) feeling of an endless buffet of romantic choices."

"...Daisy instructed me on the basics of the sisterhood; stick together, don’t sabotage. It was everything I needed to hear in that moment..."

"The average American woman spends about an hour and a half more on unpaid work than the average man each day. That means she’s doing more child care, housework, shopping, and volunteering. And that’s OK."

"Two summers ago, my father asked if I would give him one of my kidneys. He was 70 at the time, suffering from kidney disease. I was 39 with a wife and two young kids, and I was blindsided by his request."

"Although Hard to Love covers diverse territory, Hopper’s primary concern is to understand what it means to be a single woman who has built a life, predominantly, through close friendships with other women."

"“No,” said another, “we have no documented case of anyone conceiving a biological child with these numbers. You could move on to egg donation, and of course adoption is always an option.”"

"There’s a lot of money in weddings; there’s been a lot of money lost in wedding startups. Why is it so hard to disrupt the wedding industrial complex?"

"To be a parent in 2019 is to walk a flaming tightrope of neverending shame and judgement and guilt. You’re constantly reminded that every decision you ever make will have far-reaching and disastrous consequences for you, your child and the world.."

"A study of 17th-century midwifery manuals reminds us that new mothers have always craved information about their children-to-be..."

"Her dad died three decades ago. She's three. Is preserving a Jewish bloodline worth creating a child who will never know her father?"

"Both hardcore anti-vaxxers and those who are reluctant or hesitant to vaccinate their children tend to occupy specific moral universes."

"Once, the father asked the daughter in a quiet, wistful voice whether it would be possible for him to move away from the facility and live somewhere else. She held her breath..."

"Our turn to formula, though, ended up being one of those unanticipated twists of parenthood that I look back on with the most gratitude."

"It’s true that high-octane, hardworking child-rearing has some pointless excesses, and it doesn’t spark joy for parents. But done right, it works for kids..."

"From the outside it may look like anything goes within the confines of polyamory. But actually, most non-monogamous relationships are based on a highly personalized set of agreements."

"What does it mean for a child today to be alone, to have an independent inner life? I’ve talked to scores of parents who use location-monitoring software to track their teenagers’ movements, who scrutinize their Instagram feeds and photo streams.."

"I’ll state the obvious and say that much if not all of the reason my life hasn’t changed is that I’m not a parent. Children are life’s great timekeepers, and when you don’t live with any, you’re at the mercy of your own internal clock..."

"My wish is to die in my own bed, cared for by people I love—clean, comfortable and relatively free from pain. I hope to have time to say my goodbyes and give my final blessings."

"Why are we spending money we don’t have on images of cute but armed cherubs and expensive dinners out? The answer is both complicated and surprisingly simple: We think true love will make our futures safe and secure."

"You have scheduled the events for the wrong day, because the correct day on which to celebrate Valentine's Day is, in fact, the day that comes before it."

"Wedding expos around the country bring together soon-to-be-married couples and the companies vying for their business. The companies range in size from large chains such as Bed Bath & Beyond to local wedding planners."

"For years, I have kept my sexuality a secret from Nonna, my father’s mother. Born and raised in the rolling hills of Calabria, Italy, she has lived a life of tradition, of fulfilling expectations. Queerness doesn’t exist in her world..."

"When you understand your branch of the family tree, you’ll know why you are the way you are – your personality, how you problem-solve, and how you relate to friends, coworkers, and loved ones."

"To be 40 now is certainly very different than being 40 at any other time in our history... But is it really the new 20, or 30? I'm going to have to say no. And I'm perfectly fine with that."

"I never really knew how alone I could feel while being constantly physically attached to one or two tiny humans. It is a strange paradox."

"In Rock Needs River, Vanessa McGrady tells of how she invited her daughter's biological parents into her own home, and everyone had to live with the consequences."

"It’s happened more times than I’d like to admit: I’ve just woken up from a vivid dream during which my partner has lied/cheated/otherwise been a complete a**hole. I look over at him, ready to fight."

"Professional mom Hillary Frank is here to give you permission to tell white lies and make everything a game." Follow the link to check out the podcast.

Jason Adam Katzenstein and illustrator Nick Thorburn take to the New Yorker to illustrate the subtle ways in which our behavior changes when left to our own devices.

"As bizarre as an anti-day-care bill may seem, the fear of more children coming into a community is a mainstay at new housing proposal hearings."

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JJ Editor's Daily Picks

"Ever since the second-largest Ebola outbreak began raging in the Democratic Republic of Congo in August, health authorities have feared that the virus might one day spill over DRC’s porous borders. That moment, unfortunately, has arrived."

"Even in these tortured times, it is worth devoting a small sliver of outrage to the fact that Jared Kushner—whose only qualification to senior-advise the president on policy is that he is married to the president’s daughter—seems to have taken..."

"The 1967 Six-Day War ended with what many people considered a miracle. It allowed Israel to do what it could not do during the War of Independence 19 years earlier: Liberate Jerusalem and unite the capital; take control over the ancient parts of..."

"Love, in the world of Walt Disney films, has changed. Between Tangled (2010) and Moana (2016), the ideal of heterosexual romance has been dethroned by a new ideal: family love. The happy ending of our most-watched childhood stories is no longer..."

"The recent California Democratic Party convention in San Francisco exposed the divide between the state’s progressive and working-class voters. Progressives, in their militant certitude, support left-wing policies that often don’t affect them..."

"Seven years after the arrival of 4G, EE has finally switched on the UK’s first 5G networks in six UK cities – and more are coming. The upgrade promises much faster data connections but conspiratorially-minded online activists are convinced that..."

"Scroll below any news network’s tweet about an act of human kindness or survival and you’ll find the grateful replies: “Finally, some good news for a change,” and “We need more stories like this!” and “Faith in humanity restored!”"

"How many words can you fit in a subtitle? For a slew of modern books, the answer seems to be as many as possible. Just look at Julie Holland’s “Moody Bitches: The Truth About the Drugs You’re Taking, the Sleep You’re Missing, the Sex You’re Not..."

"This parenting thing is bonkers. Parenting a special needs child? Super bonkers. How else to describe the reality of constantly making decisions that one’s supremely unqualified to make, decisions that impact the life of a child?"

"A sour, unfamiliar, and not particularly pleasant smell began to waft through the house, not what you would expect from bread that was fresh out of the oven. But this wasn’t ordinary bread, it had risen thanks to some exceptional yeast that had..."

"The glaciers are melting, the coral reefs are dying, Miami Beach is slowly going under. Quick, says a voice in your head, go see them before they disappear! You are evil, says another voice. For you are hastening their destruction. To a lot..."

"Is Judaism a tradition linked directly to the Bible, taking us back to Mount Sinai, i.e., the original word of God? Or is it a general code of law that slowly evolved over the years into what it is today? If we delve into the Talmud, we will..."