May 23, 2019

Family

"From the outside it may look like anything goes within the confines of polyamory. But actually, most non-monogamous relationships are based on a highly personalized set of agreements."

"What does it mean for a child today to be alone, to have an independent inner life? I’ve talked to scores of parents who use location-monitoring software to track their teenagers’ movements, who scrutinize their Instagram feeds and photo streams.."

"I’ll state the obvious and say that much if not all of the reason my life hasn’t changed is that I’m not a parent. Children are life’s great timekeepers, and when you don’t live with any, you’re at the mercy of your own internal clock..."

"My wish is to die in my own bed, cared for by people I love—clean, comfortable and relatively free from pain. I hope to have time to say my goodbyes and give my final blessings."

"Why are we spending money we don’t have on images of cute but armed cherubs and expensive dinners out? The answer is both complicated and surprisingly simple: We think true love will make our futures safe and secure."

"You have scheduled the events for the wrong day, because the correct day on which to celebrate Valentine's Day is, in fact, the day that comes before it."

"Wedding expos around the country bring together soon-to-be-married couples and the companies vying for their business. The companies range in size from large chains such as Bed Bath & Beyond to local wedding planners."

"For years, I have kept my sexuality a secret from Nonna, my father’s mother. Born and raised in the rolling hills of Calabria, Italy, she has lived a life of tradition, of fulfilling expectations. Queerness doesn’t exist in her world..."

"When you understand your branch of the family tree, you’ll know why you are the way you are – your personality, how you problem-solve, and how you relate to friends, coworkers, and loved ones."

"To be 40 now is certainly very different than being 40 at any other time in our history... But is it really the new 20, or 30? I'm going to have to say no. And I'm perfectly fine with that."

"I never really knew how alone I could feel while being constantly physically attached to one or two tiny humans. It is a strange paradox."

"In Rock Needs River, Vanessa McGrady tells of how she invited her daughter's biological parents into her own home, and everyone had to live with the consequences."

"It’s happened more times than I’d like to admit: I’ve just woken up from a vivid dream during which my partner has lied/cheated/otherwise been a complete a**hole. I look over at him, ready to fight."

"Professional mom Hillary Frank is here to give you permission to tell white lies and make everything a game." Follow the link to check out the podcast.

Jason Adam Katzenstein and illustrator Nick Thorburn take to the New Yorker to illustrate the subtle ways in which our behavior changes when left to our own devices.

"As bizarre as an anti-day-care bill may seem, the fear of more children coming into a community is a mainstay at new housing proposal hearings."

"Universal pre-K is bad policy. Public money for early childhood education would be much better spent on programs that support families."

"For Anna, there is no such thing as a bad party. No night can drag on too long; no guest can overstay her welcome. People, she believes, are born to be together. For her, if solitude is not quite a vice, it is at best an inexplicable lapse in taste"

"Fathers are so critical to the survival of our children and our species that evolution has not left their suitability for the role to chance. "

"Like most traditional birth amulets, my kimpetbrivl included the text of Psalm 121... On paper, the invocation of these biblical figures feels powerful, a call out to the ancestors to protect their children’s children."

"You know that feeling when you say something and then hear it in your own mother’s voice and half of you screams while the other half is so satisfied, so relieved, to be in this familiar territory?"

"Only children always want to get their way, can’t share and are generally selfish—or so the long-held prejudice goes. According to recent research, however, these claims are overstated."

"...the FDA's newfound sense of urgency regarding teen e-cigarette use is overdue. Beyond the nicotine in e-cigarettes, there are other less well-understood chemical threats like diacetyl..."

"Modern parents haven’t stopped playing favorites; they’ve just stopped doing it openly. Though few parents today will admit they have a favorite child, studies indicate that about two-thirds of parents do."

"While on vacation in New Zealand, a family with “approximately 12” but maybe as many as 15 members spent nearly a month terrorizing the nation before the government gave them an official deportation notice."

"When I speak to parents’ groups about kids who are addicted to Fortnite and other video games, I tell them that it is the parents’ job to limit, govern and guide their kids’ use of video games..."

"Don’t worry, people told her, it’ll be easier now that you know what you’re doing. The older one will help take care of the younger one. Plus, kids need a sibling."

"If an autistic child is behaving in a way that makes a teacher uncomfortable, it is the teacher's job to learn how to best meet the child's needs, not the child's job to do the impossible — that is, to become neurotypical."

"Today, tons of adults in their 20s and 30s — around 53 percent, according to one study — still linger on the same cellphone plans they’ve been on since high school or middle school, the ones their parents signed up for in the 2000s..."

"When it comes to exercise, it’s never too late, and it can change the dynamics of getting older. Paul Biegler reports. Research under way in Melbourne is showing that exercise can, literally, make your body younger."

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JJ Editor's Daily Picks

"The results were surprising. The center-right coalition, led by Prime Minister Scott Morrison, remained in power against the opposition Labor party, which had led in every poll for years."

"Anger seldom works against Trump; he owns the currency and can always issue more of it. In addressing the rogue President directly, or speaking about him in the third person, Pelosi usually adopts a tone that is more sorrowful than angry..."

"I am Mizrahi, as are the majority of Jews in Israel today. We are of Middle Eastern and North African descent. Only about 30% of Israeli Jews are Ashkenazi, or the descendants of European Jews."

"Kids are exposed to plenty of controversial social issues on a daily basis. And if parents don’t want their kids to watch “Mr. Ratburn and the Special Someone,” they can turn off the TV."

"Are public-school teachers really underpaid? It’s a claim often made during teacher pay disputes, but the same data and statistical methods that produce the “teacher salary gap” lead to some ridiculous conclusions..."

"Tech companies are getting into the business of making cities. We need to stop Silicon Valley social engineering before things get even worse."

"Having a Library or Cafe Down the Block Could Change Your Life: Living close to public amenities—from parks to grocery stores—increases trust, decreases loneliness, and restores faith in local government."

"“What name . . . shall we give to the darkness of hell...?” The question of how we can name a place such as this is at the center of scholar Scott G. Bruce’s new anthology The Penguin Book of Hell."

"She had all six of her kids — ages 5, 4, 2 (twins) and 10 months (also twins!) in her 10-seater van. To get the kids a quick snack, Curry parked in front of the Cobbler’s Café."

"Nearly three-quarters of those surveyed said they grew up typically eating dinner at a kitchen table, but a little less than half said they do so now when eating at home."

"If you tied a rope tight around the Earth’s equator and then added a single yard of slack, would the extra material make any noticeable difference to someone standing on the ground?"

"While American Jewish women face attacks on our freedom and rising anti-Semitism, abortion opponents are appropriating Jewish history in order to push an agenda that hurts women."