June 26, 2019

Family

"“The one thing more difficult than following a regimen is not imposing it on others,” wrote Marcel Proust, but these days almost nobody even bothers attempting the latter."

"Being single is very expensive, maybe paying a premium matchmaker thousands of dollars to meet someone isn’t so crazy."

"Most of us have had moments when we’ve fantasized about having different parents, people we imagine are closer to our true nature. But few of us have a name for our fantasy parent."

"When breast isn’t best: New parents face intense moral pressure from every quarter to breastfeed their babies. But sometimes bottle is best..."

"The idea of being “ready” for a relationship is both ubiquitous and vague. “Readiness” is a well-worn T-shirt people put on and take off over and over again throughout their dating life..."

"The Best Thing Experienced Parents Can Do for New Parents: Be an advocate for better day care and paid parental leave. One day, your grandchildren will thank you."

"MCP’s one-year curriculum teaches men with a history of violence how to defuse their anger by using tools like breathing exercises..."

"Division of labor in the home is one of the most important equity issues of our time. Yet at this rate it will be another 75 years before men do half the work."

"Like many big changes in life, Kemp's conversion was a process rather than a moment. Years after her mother's death, it came time for her son's bar mitzvah — the Jewish coming-of-age ceremony."

"Millennials have killed malls, cheese, and bar soap... Their thirst for blood unslaked, they’re now coming for good, old-fashioned cheating...."

"In recent years, the concept of "mommy tribes" has taken hold. Some of these parent groups are not just meeting for coffee or baby and beer afternoons; they're making their philosophy official on social media."

"Rare children’s books, made available online through the Library of Congress, show both the constants and the evolution in children’s literature."

"It’s ridiculous how many expectations and conventions exist around childbirth and parenting. But over the course of writing two books about this time of life, I’ve come to appreciate that there are some things you simply can not anticipate..."

"Egg freezing had become so routine among my single peers that when I hit 35, I never thought twice. Here’s what I wish I had known."

"Each year at the Seder, when we speak of the four sons we forget to think of their four fathers. Fathers who, like the sons, are really just four sides of one individual. Wicked and wise. Articulate and stupefied."

"A psychologist explains how a strong relationship with a parent or teacher can help boys be their true selves, even when those selves don’t fit within narrow cultural norms."

"I used to aspire to be some type of Pinterest-y mom, but I gave up on that before my first could even crawl. Instead, I have striven to be a present and supportive mom."

"I really love these old photos of my family in New Mexico. I love all my aunties in saris going on hikes up the Sandia Mountains. I love the dissonance of that—you don’t see that anywhere."

"Because Westeros is a primogeniture society where heirs—and daughters who marry heirs in order to cement alliances—are essential, having a child is one of the central ways women gain power."

"The biggest example of a change in men's gendered behavior in recent years is the transformation of fatherhood. Nowadays, the definition of manhood has increasingly included being a present, and good caregiver."

"Some aggression is normal, experts say; parents can respond with redirection or distraction rather than by punishing the child with anger, yelling or spanking."

"Do you think you are an above-average driver, as most people do? How do you compare with others as a parent? Are you better than most at dancing? Where do you rank in your capability to save humanity?"

"Let’s first agree: It is probably an act of profound and essential self-care to ignore whatever is happening between George and Kellyanne Conway..."

"Parents feed their kids what food companies are telling them is kid food, and not realizing those food choices may be impacting their kids’ health,” said Dr. Nimali Fernando, a pediatrician in Virginia and founder of the nonprofit Doctor Yum..."

"On one recent Tuesday, I received two emails with requests from my daughter’s teacher: Send in a collection of 100 things for the 100th day of school, and find something starting with the letter Q for show-and-tell."

"Kamala Harris, the “progressive prosecutor” wanted to transform how California responded to students missing school. Parents like Cheree Peoples wound up paying the price."

""Sharenting" - the act of parents sharing news and pictures of their kids online - is in the news after Gwyneth Paltrow posted a picture of her and her 14-year-old daughter Apple Martin skiing."

"In an increasingly global world, Americans should be adding, not slashing, opportunities for their children to learn another tongue."

"Trustful parents allow their children as much freedom as reasonably possible to make their own decisions. They trust their children’s instincts, judgments, and ability to learn from mistakes."

“REPRODUCTION IS MESSY. The genetic swaps and recombinations that occur when gametes merge don’t always happen perfectly. Babies don’t arrive when scheduled. Even preventing reproduction can be complicated, as anyone who has ever wrestled with birth control can attest.

That said, It’s arguably a better time than ever to have a baby. Prospective parents struggling with infertility can turn to IVF, or sperm and egg donation. But as the egg donor industry grows more sophisticated, the donors themselves are sometimes kept in the dark. Once a person becomes pregnant, they can take advantage of the extraordinary advancements in noninvasive prenatal testing to screen for chromosomal abnormalities and genetic mutations—but then, what actually happens to the mountains of genetic information these tests generate?

Or maybe it’s the worst time to have a kid. Mounting societal concerns—political upheaval, climate change, the general crushing financial and psychic toll children impose—make procreating seem like a spectacularly bad idea. People who opt to go #childfree certainly think so. And still-high prematurity rates, especially among minorities, show that science alone can’t solve every problem.”

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