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April 12, 2021

Netanyahu to Austin: Israel Won’t Allow Iran to Carry Out Goal of Nuclear Genocide

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has vowed that Israel will never allow Iran to develop “nuclear capability to carry out its genocidal goal of eliminating Israel” during a joint press conference with visiting U.S. Secretary of Defense Lloyd Austin in Jerusalem on Monday.

“My policy as prime minister of Israel is clear. I will never allow Iran the nuclear capability to carry out its genocidal goal of eliminating Israel. And Israel will continue to defend itself against Iran’s aggression and terrorism,” said Netanyahu. He mentioned the recent commemoration of Yom Hashoah and that Israel “will never allow it [the Holocaust] to happen again.”

In his remarks, Austin described his visit to the Yad Vashem Holocaust memorial in Jerusalem and how it impacted him.

“I want to reaffirm the administration’s strong commitment to Israel and to the Israeli people. That’s why I thought it was important that we meet face to face and to express our earnest desire for close consultations with Israel, as we address shared challenges in the region,” he stated.

The defense secretary continued, saying, “I also wanted to underscore my personal pledge to strengthening Israel’s security and ensuring Israel’s Qualitative Military Edge. The close and strong ties that we enjoy with Israel are central to regional stability and security in the Middle East. We both agree that we must work continue to work closely together to enhance the U.S.-Israel strategic partnership.

He added that they “discussed ways to deepen the defense relationship in the face of regional threats.”

Netanyahu to Austin: Israel Won’t Allow Iran to Carry Out Goal of Nuclear Genocide Read More »

Central Iranian Nuclear Site Knocked Out Hours After Activating Advanced Centrifuges

Iranian officials on Sunday reported that an electric grid failure has led to a sweeping power outage in its Natanz nuclear facility, less than one day after new uranium enrichment equipment was activated at the site.

According to civilian nuclear program spokesman Behrouz Kamalvandi, the incident, which has shut down the complex’s new advanced centrifuges, among others, caused “no casualties or contamination” and is being investigated.

On Saturday, President Hassan Rouhani announced the operation of dozens of state-of-the-art centrifuges yet to be used by Iran. The new machinery installed in Natanz is said to be able to enrich uranium at a speed 30 to 50 times faster than the existing centrifuges.

Natanz is one of Tehran’s most important nuclear facilities and has over the past few years suffered several mysterious accidents, including fires, explosions and cyberattacks, blamed by Iran on Israel and the United States.

Iran also has accused Israel of assassinating a slew of its nuclear scientists and prominent program officials.

Our bilateral relationship with Israel … is central to regional stability and security in the Middle East

As experts were assessing the damage at the blacked-out site, US Defense Secretary Lloyd Austin touched down in Israel, kicking off his two-day trip to the Jewish state.

Austin, the first senior official of the Joe Biden administration to visit Israel, met with Alternate Prime Minister and Defense Minister Benny Gantz, and with Israel Defense Forces Chief of Staff Aviv Kochavi, and will later sit down with Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu.

“Our bilateral relationship with Israel … is central to regional stability and security in the Middle East,” Austin said during a press conference with Gantz.

“Our commitment to Israel is enduring and it is ironclad, and I pledge to continue close consultations in order to ensure Israel’s qualitative military edge and to strengthen Israel’s security.”

On Friday, US officials concluded their first round of indirect talks with Iranian representatives in Vienna, mediated by European diplomats.

The sides have looked to agree on a mechanism by which the US and the Islamic Republic can return to compliance with the 2015 nuclear deal, which was abandoned by former President Donald Trump in 2018 and later breached repeatedly by Tehran.

The Tehran of today poses a strategic threat to international security, to the entire Middle East and to the State of Israel

Gantz in his remarks stressed that “Israel views the US as a full partner across all operational threats, not the least Iran.”

“The Tehran of today poses a strategic threat to international security, to the entire Middle East and to the State of Israel,” Gantz told his counterpart.

“We will work closely with our American allies to ensure that any new agreement with Iran will secure the vital interests of the world… prevent dangerous unrest in our region and protect the state of Israel.”

Last week, Netanyahu offered a more blunt approach during the nation’s annual Holocaust Remembrance Day, warning Israel’s “closest friends: make no mistake, a treaty with Iran that paves its way to nuclear weapons won’t bind us in any way.”

I think an agreement can and probably will be reached – since both sides want it – but it’ll take some time

Professor James Acton, co-director of the Nuclear Policy Program at the Carnegie Endowment for International Peace, told The Media Line there is a good chance the Vienna talks will bear fruit, despite Israeli objections.

“Both sides have said that they want to resuscitate the Joint Comprehensive Plan of Action. Moreover, both have, explicitly or implicitly, indicated that a simultaneous return to compliance would be acceptable,” Acton said.

Yet challenges may arise when Iran and the US turn to the issue of sanctions imposed by Trump following his exit from the pact, he explains.

“Obviously, the JCPOA itself is silent on these sanctions. Again, I think an agreement can and probably will be reached – since both sides want it – but it’ll take some time.”

The Americans simply pulled out of the agreement, and the Europeans cowered to the US and did not live up to their end of the bargain in lifting the sanctions

Prof. Mehran Kamrava, who teaches government at Georgetown University’s Qatar campus, agrees there is “a genuine desire on all sides to make tangible progress in the negotiations,” but cautions of Iranian distrust.

The Americans simply pulled out of the agreement, and the Europeans cowered to the US and did not live up to their end of the bargain in lifting the sanctions

“Their negotiating partners have shown themselves to be manifestly unreliable,” Kamrava explains Tehran’s point of view. “The Americans simply pulled out of the agreement, and the Europeans cowered to the US and did not live up to their end of the bargain in lifting the sanctions.”

“Therefore it is important for the Iranians to push ahead with their own progress on the technical front lest the other side decides to once again renege on its end of the bargain,” he says, alluding to Saturday’s launching of the advanced centrifuges.

Iran has over the past few months increasingly stepped up its uranium enrichment, thereby violating the 2015 deal. It is currently enriching its stockpile to 20% purity, a step away from weapons-grade 90% levels.

A common refrain in Iran these days is that even if [it] were to completely give up its nuclear program and, say, start manufacturing shoelaces, the US and the EU, with prodding from Israel and Saudi Arabia, would begin calling Iran’s shoelace manufacturing industry the biggest threat to regional peace and security

“A common refrain in Iran these days is that even if [it] were to completely give up its nuclear program and, say, start manufacturing shoelaces, the US and the EU, with prodding from Israel and Saudi Arabia, would begin calling Iran’s shoelace manufacturing industry the biggest threat to regional peace and security,” Kamrava demonstrates Tehran’s frustrations.

“This is the understanding that informs Iran’s endgame in the negotiations. Given their behavior since 2018, it is difficult to argue that the endgame of the US and EU is anything less than Iran’s complete surrender.”

Acton believes the JCPOA, while far from perfect, is “the best available route to block Iran’s acquisition of nuclear weapons.”

“I think the administration’s plan [is] to engage Iran on further restrictions on its nuclear and missile program as part of a “more-for-more” approach, only after restoring the JCPOA,” he adds.

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CUNY Student Senate Votes Down Resolution Endorsing IHRA

The City University of New York’s (CUNY) University Student Senate (USS) voted down a resolution endorsing the International Holocaust Remembrance Alliance (IHRA) definition of anti-Semitism and another resolution supporting a watered-down definition of anti-Semitism after a five-hour debate.

The resolution with the watered-down definition of anti-Semitism, which was being pushed by the CUNY Jewish Law Students Association (JLSA) and Students for Justice in Palestine (SJP), defined anti-Semitism as “hostility, prejudice, vilification, discrimination or violence directed against Jews, as individuals, groups, or as a collective — because they are Jews. Its expression includes attributing to Jews, as a group, practices, characteristics or behaviors that are perceived as dangerous, harmful, frightening, or threatening to non-Jews.” It also claimed that “the equation of speech and activity opposing Israel and Zionism, and/or supporting Palestinians, as inherently antisemitic is a form of anti-Palestinian racism.”

Despite their resolution failing, JLSA celebrated the fact that the Student Senate voted down the other resolution supporting IHRA, tweeting that the Student Senate recognized “the harmful effects of equating antisemitism with anti-Zionism” and “taking a stand against the racist and Islamophobic ways that IHRA has been used to smear Palestinian, Arab, Muslim, and Jewish students.”

 

IfNotNow, a leftist Jewish organization, similarly tweeted, “Congratulations to the students at CUNY who organized against the codification of the controversial IHRA definition of antisemitism on their campus which would’ve curbed free speech, silenced Palestinians, and done nothing to make Jewish students any safer!”

Other Jewish groups had mixed reactions. “While it is extremely disappointing that CUNY USS voted against the IHRA definition of antisemitism, we are relieved that a definition that was crafted by members of Students for Justice in Palestine, to shield themselves from being criticized for promoting antisemitism, was also voted down,” StandWithUs co-founder and CEO Roz Rothstein said in a statement.

“We commend Jewish students for standing up to such malicious bigotry and for the petition they created online that garnered thousands of signatures in favor of the IHRA definition. CUNY USS can still do the right thing by supporting the majority of Jewish students and recognizing the IHRA definition, and we call on them to do so.”

Ilya Bratman, executive director of Hillel at Baruch College, similarly said in a statement to the Journal, “While we are disappointed that the IHRA Definition was not adopted, we are relieved that the definition written by groups that do not represent the majority of the Jewish community was not adopted. We hope that next steps will include better dialogue amongst CUNY students as well as education across CUNY about antisemitism.”

Kenneth Marcus, who heads the Louis Brandeis Center and is a former professor at CUNY, said in a statement to the Journal, “As someone who cares about CUNY and spent three years teaching at what is now CUNY’s Marxe School of Public and International Affairs, it saddens me to see such profound misunderstandings disseminated among CUNY’s students and faculty. CUNY’s unique dedication to social justice advocacy should translate into strong support for the global campaign against contemporary anti-Semitism. In fact, what we’re seeing at CUNY and elsewhere is that the opposite is now increasingly the case: those who should be doing the most to oppose anti-Semitism are actually fighting on the wrong side. Instead of opposing the global resurgence of anti-Semitism, they are taking actions that will only encourage its spread.”

Marcus, who also worked for the Department of Education’s Office of Civil Rights under the Bush and Trump administrations, added that even though the Student Senate rejected both resolutions, they are not being neutral. “The IHRA Working Definition is now the international standard for defining and combating anti-Semitism. In rejecting the IHRA definition, together with a risible alternative, CUNY’s student senate has allowed itself to be used by those who are intent on undermining the international campaign to combat Jew-hatred.”

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U.S. Must Put a Condition to Palestinian Aid: No More Teaching Jew-Hatred

Whatever happened to the Palestinians? They’re still there, of course, approximately 4.8 million living in the West Bank and Gaza, along with another 2 million or so who have made their homes elsewhere in the Middle East, Europe and the Americas. The debate over Palestinian statehood is just as intractable as ever and further from resolution than at any time in recent memory. But perhaps because of the ongoing stalemate, the issue has been obscured by other developments in Israel and abroad.

Most notably, the normalization of Israel’s relationships with several Arab Gulf states through the Abraham Accords and subsequent diplomacy could fundamentally remake the power structure in the Middle East. The fitful negotiations over Iran’s nuclear capability and the growing menace that country poses to the rest of the region have dominated recent news coverage. Within Israel, tensions between the country’s secular and religious communities, controversy over the government’s handling of the coronavirus pandemic and the prime minister’s legal challenges all commanded much more attention in last month’s election than the Palestinians.

The Biden administration has downplayed their interest in the Israel-Palestinian relationship, making it clear that the new president has little interest in expending international political capital trying to resolve a conflict that has stymied his predecessors of both parties for decades. He put off his initial phone call to Benjamin Netanyahu for weeks after taking office and has still not spoken to Palestinian leader Mahmoud Abbas. (Abbas refused a call from Secretary of State Anthony Blinken.) Biden’s Defense Department is preparing for a major shift of U.S. military capabilities from the Middle East to the Pacific Rim, further indicating that he is unlikely to seriously engage in the region anytime soon.

So it attracted little mainstream media attention last week when the Biden administration announced it would restore financial aid to the Palestinians that had been halted during President Donald Trump’s presidency. Whether such assistance has proved helpful to the peace process in the past is debatable, but Biden’s decision to return to a pre-Trump approach on this matter is not a radical departure from the manner in which both Democratic and Republican presidents have addressed the issue in the pre-Trump past. Even so, Israel’s U.S. supporters have issued stark warnings about the danger of reestablishing aid without asking the Palestinians and their allies to provide anything in return.

Israel’s U.S. supporters have issued stark warnings about the danger of reestablishing aid without asking the Palestinians and their allies to provide anything in return.

Of immediate concern are potential violations of the Taylor Force Act of 2018, which forbids U.S. funding to the Palestinian Authority until it stops making payments to the families of terrorists. The law is named after an American college student killed in a terrorist attack while visiting Israel in 2016. The Act stipulates that American funding can be used only for certain health-related services: It appears that the Biden Administration’s original aid package may provide assistance to programs that are not permitted. Eighteen Republican Senators have written to Blinken asking for closer oversight and further explanation.

But an even greater long-term threat to Israeli-Palestinian peaceful co-existence is posed by the development and dissemination of textbooks for schoolchildren in the West Bank and Gaza, which encourage violence and intolerance against Israel. Lesson plans created by the United Nations Relief and Works Agency (UNWRA) were recently discovered to include materials that referred to Israel as “the enemy,” statements that “Jihad is one of the doors to Paradise” and math assignments asking students to identify the number of intifada “martyrs.” U.N. officials have indicated that the materials were distributed in error, but they have not explained how such propaganda was developed by UNWRA to begin with.

For the second consecutive year, Democratic and Republican House members have co-sponsored legislation requiring the U.S. State Department to review all lesson plans sponsored by either UNWRA or the Palestinian Authority to ensure the content is appropriate and non-incendiary. At a time when the U.S. government is preparing to resume sending hundreds of millions of dollars in Palestinian aid, asking the PA to refrain from indoctrinating their children with anti-Zionist and anti-Semitic slurs seems like a reasonable tradeoff for considerable financial support. If the Biden administration is determined to provide funding for the Palestinians, it’s even more important for the president to support this legislation and demand Palestinian and UNWRA cooperation in return.

There are many difficult decisions looming for Biden and his team as they navigate the often-treacherous waters of the region’s politics. But this should be an easy one. If not, it could be a long four years.


Dan Schnur teaches political communications at UC Berkeley, USC and Pepperdine. He hosts the weekly webinar “Politics in the Time of Coronavirus” for the Los Angeles World Affairs Council & Town Hall.

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Biden’s New Slate of Aid to Palestinians Comes Under Intense Scrutiny

(JTA) — A number of pro-Israel groups, Israeli officials and Republicans in Congress are stepping up their scrutiny of the Biden administration’s plans to resume funding for the Palestinian Authority and other groups aiding Palestinians.

In the past two weeks, the Biden administration has rolled out pledges to deliver $75 million in assistance to Palestinian areas; $40 million for security assistance to the Palestinian Authority; $150 million to the U.N.’s Palestinian refugee agency, UNRWA; and $15 million for COVID assistance. Also pledged is $10 million that goes to Palestinian-Israeli people-to-people programs.

U.S. officials, including Secretary of State Antony Blinken, have said the spending will comply with congressional restrictions, and comply with laws banning (with a few exceptions) direct assistance to the Palestinian Authority as long as it pays subsidies to the families of Palestinians who have killed Israelis or Palestinians — a longstanding PA policy.

That’s not enough to assuage skeptics, who cite a government watchdog report released last week that said that, from 2015 to 2019, U.S. aid officials did not sufficiently verify whether money meant to reach only nongovernmental organizations in fact ended up with terrorists.

Sen. Ted Cruz, R-Texas, spearheaded a letter to Biden on Thursday from 18 Republican senators urging the Biden administration to pause the disbursement of assistance to the West Bank and Gaza Strip subject to further congressional scrutiny.

Cruz and the other senators want the Biden administration to assure Congress that “necessary aid being provided to the Palestinians, including as envisioned by Congress and described in the Taylor Force Act, is tightly targeted to ensure that it benefits the Palestinian people and not the PA or Hamas.” The Taylor Force Act, named for an American victim of a terrorist attack, is a law that conditions aid to Palestinians over whether the Palestinian Authority suspends funding for killers of Israelis and Americans.

Sen. James Risch, R-Idaho, the top Republican on the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, and Rep. Michael McCaul, R-Texas, his counterpart in the U.S. House of Representatives, on Wednesday pledged “to scrutinize every proposed program to ensure the administration’s actions are in lockstep with the Taylor Force Act.”

The Jerusalem Post reported that Risch and McCaul have used their positions on their respective committees to delay the disbursement of the funds.

President Donald Trump suspended most aid to the Palestinians in 2018, in part because the Palestinians snubbed his moves to initiate Middle East peace and in part because of the payments that go to killers of Israelis and Americans. Biden campaigned on resuming funding to the Palestinians, saying it was critical for humanitarian reasons and to restore American credibility in the region.

“UNRWA remains in desperate need of fundamental reform,” the American Israel Public Affairs Committee tweeted Wednesday. “Its waste, fraud, resistance to reform & internal turmoil make it among the most inefficient UN agencies. Moreover UNRWA’s misguided definition of refugees directly contributes to prolonging the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.”

In a statement unusual for a diplomat, Israeli Ambassador Gilad Erdan denounced the resumption of funding to UNRWA — or the United Nations Relief and Works Agency for Palestinian refugees — absent reforms in the agency. The Orthodox Union also sent a letter to Blinken questioning the resumption of assistance to the West Bank and Gaza. The Zionist Organization of America has additionally objected to the new funding.

Liberal pro-Israel groups, including J Street and Americans for Peace Now, have praised the resumption of assistance, as have Democrats who are known for their closeness to the pro-Israel community, including Rep. Ted Deutch, D-Fla.

Deutch, who is Jewish, chairs the Middle East subcommittee in the House.

“Despite my serious concerns about transparency and accountability at UNRWA, withholding assistance that provides healthcare & education to children during a global pandemic risks further deteriorating an already dire humanitarian crisis in Gaza made worse by Hamas,” Deutch said on Twitter.

The women’s Zionist organization Hadassah, the Anti-Defamation League and an array of other Jewish groups are rallying senators to sign a letter to the U.N. Secretary-General, Antonio Guterres, urging him to reform UNRWA’s schools, which they say peddle anti-Semitic slanders in textbooks.

Biden’s New Slate of Aid to Palestinians Comes Under Intense Scrutiny Read More »

Post-Pandemic Life — Proceed with Caution

For better or worse, we slowed down this past year. During pandemic life, most of us, from the extroverts to the introverts, stopped having to choose to say yes or no to others asking for our time.

But as an extrovert, I’m hungry to live again. Now that the buffet of life is about to reopen, I am worried I’m going to gorge on everything and say yes to everyone.

I already binged a bit. I held an elegant Passover Seder for 56 Jewish singles for my Audrey’s Tent group, followed by hosting needy house guests for two weeks. But I forgot how much energy it takes to interact in person. I’m still working from home, and the community events haven’t even started. If I try to go from stillness to running from meeting to event, dawn to dusk, like a whirling dervish, I’ll crash and burn.

Intuitively I know I need to proceed with caution into this post-pandemic world, but I’m unclear how to set boundaries. So this past Friday, after the last house guest left, I packed up and headed to a cabin in the mountains. My goal was to rest, meditate and plan a path that eases me into post-pandemic life and allows me to protect my time in a purposeful way.

But even getting away was hard. As I was packing, a girlfriend invited me to an impromptu divorce/freedom party and another friend needed help dealing with his angry teenage son. I yearned to stay and go to them. It was hard to say no to others, but it was a conscious choice to say yes to myself.

As I drove on the winding, precarious road up 6000 feet, I thought how I spent generous time on self-care, reflection and healing this past year. I don’t want to erase my progress by going back to the way things were: chaotic, allowing others’ needs and demands to define my life.

I don’t want to erase my progress by going back to the way things were: chaotic, allowing others’ needs and demands to define my life.

Jewish sage Hillel said, “If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am only for myself, what am I? And if not now, when?” (Pirkei Avot 1:14) My “now” started when I arrived at the cabin. I unpacked my bags — one of stuff and one of food — and set off on a hike before sunset. The forest was a maze of legacy pine trees, twisted blackened stumps hollowed by recent fires, and the hope of new growth. The symphony of birds brought me into the present and reminded me I was a guest of Mother Nature. I made it back in time to light Shabbat candles and bring in the Sabbath with a glass of red wine, a simple salad and a heart full of gratitude.

I started my quest by reading six articles from a Google search “Saying No to Others is Saying Yes to Yourself.” They were good but didn’t go deep enough for me. Then I found the book “Saying No and Letting Go: Jewish Wisdom on Making Room for What Matters Most” by Rabbi Edwin Goldberg. This was a better fit.

Rabbi Goldberg began his book by comparing how we choose to say yes and no in life to how G-d created the world. He highlighted a Kabbalistic principal I had never heard of, “tzimtzum.” Tzimtzum means “willfully letting go of control” in Hebrew. The purpose of Goldberg’s book is to teach readers to engage in a process of tzimtzum. To willfully pull back and say no in order to regain control of the things that matter most to us.

The formula is simple: Find the space in your life to discover what are your core values and through that discovery, what you want in your life. Then it’s easy to say no to what you don’t want.

OK, I thought. I found my space, an isolated cabin. Now I had time to define my priorities. I liked the concept, but I needed my own visual framework for it to make sense.

Because I spent so much time recently in my house, I brought this concept to life by designing my “House of Meaning.” My House is a virtual construct of time founded on the idea that saying no frees up space, opens potential and liberates time so that I can become the person I ought to be and live a life without resentment.

I created a design where each element builds on the one before it. Yet all elements must be strong for the home to fulfill its intention. So here’s my architectural plan for my House of Meaning:

  • FoundationHealth: Without putting my health first, the house crumbles.
  • FloorFamily: Caring for my family, my children (fur babies, too) is what grounds me.
  • RoofProfession/Prosperity with Purpose: My work has purpose to serve others but also provides financial security.
  • Four WallsFriends, Community, Jewish Life, Tzedakah: Each wall equally provides meaning: sustaining friendships, strengthening my community, living a Jewish life and giving tzedakah (charity).
  • Windows Creativity: the view where I look outside for inspiration to feed my creative spirit and allow time to write, read, dream and discover.
  • KitchenSoul: The soul of my home is in the kitchen, from which nourishment and vitality come in the form of food, music and dance.
  • BedroomPassion: The center of passion, intimacy and laughter with a loving life partner. (G-d willing, coming soon…)
  • Energy Within — Love, beauty, gratitude, tranquility, peace and joy: When you “enter my home,” you are filled with these attributes.
  • Entry/ExitsGuarding Time: Each doorway is a place of awareness, a momentary meditation to ask, “Do I want this in my life?” Yes or No?

What does NOT belong in my House of Meaning: saving lost souls, one night stands, negative people, anything that sucks my time, unhealthy food, working all night, wanderlust, yearning for fame and fortune and FOMO.

My idea is that if a person, an opportunity or a thought appears that doesn’t align with the values of my House of Meaning, it doesn’t belong in my life. Just say no. Self-limitation is an invitation to expansive possibility, easy of spirit and joy.

It’s not my natural inclination, but I look forward to saying no more than saying yes — not only to people and events but also to bad habits and self-sabotaging thoughts. Saying no means I know what’s best for me.

So now that the world’s opening up and I’ve designed my House of Meaning, I’m confident it will allow me to re-enter the world mindfully saying yes only when it feels right. I have my Tzimtzum, my process of letting go of people, things, and thoughts that waste time and making room for a life of beauty and goodness.

You too can design your House of Meaning. It will look different than mine. Create it with the principles that can protect you from the dangers of re-entering a post-pandemic world without purpose.

Until then, go gently into tomorrow and be mindful to say no more than yes!


Audrey Jacobs is a financial adviser and has three sons. 

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Our Integrated Passover Seder

We took our show on the road this Passover. Thanks to the CDC’s guidance, my husband Ted and I loosened up and took our first post-COVID, double-vaccinated plane trip to Austin, Texas, where our son and his family live. It was time for our annual Pesach celebration — a seder put on by my husband and me, two old-school secular Jews whose goal is to entice grandchildren to forget about the Easter bunny for a minute and get them excited about plagues, dry crackers and chopped apples.

This time, we came prepared. Our grandkids, ages six and eight, are now old enough to follow a story and sit at the table longer than 10 minutes. Our anxiety to put on a great seder comes from the fact that our son Joe married Kate, a Catholic woman from North Carolina, who did not grow up around Jews. Honestly, no one does a more child-friendly Christmas or Easter holiday than my daughter-in-law. We’re talking glittery decorations, tons of toys, crafts activities that rival Martha Stewart and a cornucopia of candies. How can a Jewish grandma hope to compete?

When they first got married, I found Kate’s being Southern even more exotic than her Catholicism. Who ever heard of a grown woman wearing a pink sun dress with a ruffle? I was from the New York school of feminine style, epitomized by crisply tailored grey and black clothes, brought to life by an occasional splash of white. All body parts covered!

After a while I could see that our differences were mostly minor matters of style. When your children get married, your world and your family are supposed to expand, right? Plus they loved each other! As for religious differences, many of my friends were raised Catholic. Most had left the religious part of being Catholic behind, just as we had with Judaism, as they drifted into adulthood. I had a hunch that Joe and Kate would do the same.

Theirs was the first intermarriage in our small family. Since the theme of Joe’s Bar Mitzvah speech was, “I am not a Jew,” it wasn’t a big surprise. I wondered how questions of identity would be handled once children arrived, but I kept that to myself, like so many things.

Folklore says that a mother exerts more influence on matters like religion and childrearing, so I did not expect a lot of Yiddishkeit to seep into Joe’s new home. Like many secular Jews, Judaism is more or less boiled down to two holidays a year and a few artifacts that are tucked away in his home — a menorah, a tallit, a Bar Mitzvah Kiddush cup. And so, we arrived for the holidays this spring ready to give the children a dose of schmaltz.

We arrived for the holidays this spring ready to give the children a dose of schmaltz.

The seder was a huge success. Now that the kids are old enough to participate, we hit all the highlights. As always, Ted was in charge of the religious aspects of the seder. He brought cheerful Haggadot for everyone, with blank pages for the kid’s little fingers to color in. I brought my world-famous Charoset recipe — the one where there’s nothing weird, and finicky kids can pick out the raisins.

I asked Ted to let me kick off the celebration, since I’m known for my ability to throw a party. I immediately turned up the volume on my iPad and blasted the song “L’chaim” from the original cast recording of “Fiddler on the Roof.” The music may have been new to them, but when I grabbed my husband’s hand to dance a rollicking hora, they joined in with gusto, as did Joe. Afterwards, Kate got to ask her questions: What does “L’chaim” mean? and “What is Fiddler on the Roof?” Oy.

Unlike the old days, Ted led a condensed seder. We were both pleased when 6-year-old Finn knew why we eat the matzoh. And 8-year-old Piper knew another place where people were slaves, right here in the United States. It turns out that Joe and Kate had started reading the story of Passover with the kids in advance, so they had some time to digest the story.

At the table, we all raised our glasses of sparkling water and toasted to a better year. I got their attention by talking about what it means to me to be a Jew. I spoke about being a good person, helping others, always telling the truth (especially to your parents) and honoring books. All values the children could understand. Of course, when they each got $5 from grandpa for finding the afikoman at the seder’s end, they were dazzled. “That’s more than I’ve ever seen,” said Finn, his eyes shining.

To seal the deal, Piper, my baking partner, and I concocted a special dessert to end the meal on the right festive note. We had baked cream puffs that morning. After dinner, we all made a mess turning them into the French dessert Profiteroles — cream puffs filled with vanilla bean ice cream and drizzled with dark chocolate hot fudge sauce. Definitely not pesadich, but tons of fun. I guess you could say that the fruit doesn’t fall far from the tree. L’chaim!


Los Angeles food writer Helene Siegel is the author of 40 cookbooks, including the “Totally Cookbook” series and “Pure Chocolate.” She runs the Pastry Session blog. During COVID-19, she shared Sunday morning baking lessons over Zoom with her granddaughter, eight-year-old Piper of Austin, Texas.

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