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June 29, 2012

When Anger Overtakes us – D’var Torah Hukat

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Recall the last time you became really angry, blindingly, uncontrollably angry, so filled with rage that you couldn’t think straight.

What did you do about it? Did you act out or say anything? When you calmed down did you feel justified in what you’d felt and satisfied in having said or done what you did? Was there a positive result to whatever you said or did, that is, did the relationship get stronger and better, or did your relationship with the person with whom you were angry deteriorate?

I ask these questions because this week’s Torah portion tells of an incident in Moses’ life when his anger had serious consequences for him and the people of Israel. The incident took place following the death of his sister Miriam, when he and his brother Aaron were still in mourning. The children of Israel had taken the occasion to complain bitterly about having no water. Moses and Aaron appealed to God, and God told Moses to gather the people, speak to a rock, and water would flow thus sating the people’s thirst.

Moses, however, was so overwrought with grief and was so aggravated at the people’s incessant complaining that instead of speaking to the rock he struck it twice with his rod. Water gushed out, as God had promised, but God was incensed by Moses’ defiance and punished him harshly:

“Because you did not trust Me enough to affirm My sanctity in the sight of the Israelite people, you shall not lead this congregation into the land that I have given them.” (Numbers 20:12)

To deny Moses the privilege of entering the Promised Land was devastating to a man who had dedicated his life to God and the people; and we ask what sin could hold such a consequence?

The rabbis offer a number of ideas. Maimonides said that Moses’ bitter language did not become his position as leader. The Talmud says that Moses lacked sufficient faith. Nahmanides thought that Moses showed hubris when he accepted credit for providing water in God’s place. And Rashi said that Moses lost his temper. 

I want to focus on Rashi’s interpretation. Isn’t rage part of being human? After all, we all get angry.

There are many contemporary parallels to Moses’ fury. One is “road rage” when a driver becomes so infuriated at another driver that he seeks vengeance. The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration has estimated that “road rage” is a factor in 28,000 highway deaths every year.

Studies of the approximately 16,000 murders annually in America reveal that a majority are committed by people who know personally the victim thus defining it as a crime of passion.

Of course, not all anger results in violent acts. Language is a powerful weapon when used skillfully against our adversaries. The old saying “sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me” is wrong. What we say and how we say it can do serious damage.

There are times, of course, when anger is justified, such as against those who misuse their talents for evil ends, in the face of ingratitude, lies, slander, theft, mistreatment of the poor, cruelty, and false claims in God’s Name. (see A Code of Jewish Ethics, volume 1, by Rabbi Joseph Telushkin, pages 258-262).

Besides righteous indignation, the tongue can cause serious damage to marriages, friendships, and relationships between co-workers, as well as inspire fear in the home, work and school settings and destroy trust.

Holding onto our anger also has a terrible effect. Mark Twain said that “anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”

If we follow Rashi’s interpretation, despite his strength as a leader, prophet, liberator, legislator, judge, and military chieftain, Moses lost the promise because he could not control his rage.

Tradition asks what constitutes real strength: Eizeh hu gibor? – Who is strong? Hakovesh et yitzro – Not the one who has physical strength, public or familial power, but “the one who controls his/her passions.” (Mishnah, Pirkei Avot 4:1) The Vilna Gaon understood the term yitzro as “his anger.”

In this sense, Moses showed a core weakness when he lost his temper before the people. If Moses was so capable of losing control, then so much the more so that each of us needs to check our rage when ever it shows itself, be it on the highway, within the home, among friends, at work, and before strangers. If we are able to do so, we and everyone around us will be the better for it. 

Shabbat shalom!

When Anger Overtakes us – D’var Torah Hukat Read More »

From which seeps the essence of Jeff’s Gourmet

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College is about learning how to fit in, or—if you’re talented enough—finding out you don’t have to. As someone who fails to make the latter group, I often find myself ordering black bean cheeseburgers and pattyless patty melts to keep up with friends who eat traif with aplomb. When I’m at school in St. Louis, a city with a single kosher deli, that’s basically the best I can do. I get by on hearty, albeit vegetarian meals.

And that’s what makes coming home to Pico-Rob really great. Making my rounds through the cornucopia of kosher establishments in the hood reminds me of the community’s startling convenience, and (more importantly) of the taste of meat.

My first stop upon arrival in the hood is always Jeff’s Gourmet. Having tried most of the menu over the 13 years since Jeff Rohatiner opened a miniscule, mostly-takeout sausage place next door to Livonia Glatt, I go for their specials when I’m in town. These range from assorted deli wraps to several variations of their hamburger.

This week I went with an old buddy to experience the much-hyped Tunisian Burger. It becomes apparent quickly that this special is quite a monstrosity. Sandwiched by a pretzel bun (not the show-stealer here), the Tunisian features Jeff’s classic burger cushioned by lettuce, tomato, and chopped onion and crowned with succulent beef bacon and a fried egg. What makes it Tunisian is a fearless Harissa sauce that set my mouth properly on fire.

What began as a challenge to my mandibular fortitude and probably my arteries ended the same way many of my meals at Jeff’s do: with me loosening my belt buckle and wondering where all the food went. Maybe somewhere underneath all those crumpled napkins.

OK, let’s go to Tunisia.

My friend suggests that perhaps the fried egg was superfluous. But wasn’t that the point? This burger is unabashedly one of the last beacons of conspicuous consumption in the post-Madoff Jewish world. It’s the McMansion of meat. As someone who orders imitation for ten months a year as pals order steak Phillies, I am proud as ever to be a carnivore, and I will never be afraid to flaunt it. Jeff’s Gourmet realizes that many Jews feel the same way and fills that void at a doable price (Tunisian: $10, and you won’t go home hungry).

How has Jeff’s established hegemony over the kosher burger/hot dog category in L.A.? A diverse menu of hearty, delicious meals; short turnaround time on orders; an above-average parking lot(!); an impressively efficient use of space (which is where many other local kosher restaurants fall short); and an effective social media presence—offering deals through FourSquare and advertising specials on its Facebook page (which has over 3600 Likes—uhh, double chai!! This is really important people!!).

It’s more than that, though. The bustling burger joint serves people from all over Los Angeles, but it has fostered a unique loyalty among Jewish young adults. 8930 West Pico Boulevard has attained a level of popularity between street cred and cult status with this segment, many of whom eat vegetarian at non-kosher restaurants, and plenty who do not eat only kosher meat. It’s this crowd that wanders the left side of modern orthodoxy—kids coming from conservative or progressive shomer Shabbos families and attending Jewish high school—which vaults Jeff’s past its competition and creates the illusion that other fast-food style kosher restaurants might be successful in the same place.

These patrons come to nourish their pride in cultural Judaism. This is where I brought my college roommate to prove that observing kashrut meant anything but being vegetarian. Jeff’s serves a different kind of soul food to someone who doesn’t keep perfect kosher, but wears a silver magen david necklace, or to someone who believes in God but never wears a kipa. It’s the one place I don’t forget to wash my hands and make hamotzi, and there’s something to be said for that (even if I invariably forget to bensch).

At the risk of overreaching, Jeff’s Gourmet is a relevant prototype for modern orthodoxy because unlike shul, or college, there’s no pressure to fit in. On the contrary, there is no fitting in here. The black hat sits by the iPhone hawk. As such, this restaurant’s success at ‘cool’ undeniably lends some swag to the movement.

Shout out to burgers made of black beans and grilled cheeses on hamburger buns.

Jeff’s Gourmet Kosher Sausage Factory

Arab lawmaker: compulsory national service ‘an act of war’

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Forcing Israeli Arabs to do mandatory national service, which is being debated in the Knesset, is “a declaration of war” an Arab Knesset member has told Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu.

“We shall strongly resist. [Arab] youth will not obey mandatory national service,” Balad Knesset member Jamal Zahalka told Netanyahu, according to Ynet. “The attempt to force compulsory service on Arab youth is a declaration of war on the Arab sector.”

Netanyahu announced on Thursday that “Arab citizens, along with the haredim, must carry their equal share of the burden,” Ynet reported.

The prime minister and deputy prime minister Shaul Mofaz are to meet today to complete a plan to gradually integrate Arabs and haredi Orthodox Jews into the Israel Defense Forces or to perform some form of national service.

A leading Islamic leader in the country also forcefully rejected the call for compulsory national service for the country’s Arabs.

“The Islamic Movement will not accept the proposal to enlist Arabs into national service because it will pave the way for IDF service which we will not be part of it,” Ynet reported Sheikh Kamal Khatib, deputy head of the Islamic Movement’s northern branch, as saying.

Arab lawmaker: compulsory national service ‘an act of war’ Read More »

Jeremy Hunt, Britain’s secretary for sports, will not call for a moment of silence at Olympics

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Great Britain’s secretary of state for culture, media and sport will not join the growing international campaign for a moment of silence at the upcoming London Summer Olympics for the 11 Israeli athletes murdered at the 1972 Munich Games.

“The decision as to whether a minute’s silence is held during the Games lies with the IOC,” a spokesman for Secretary Jeremy Hunt said, according to the London Jewish Chronicle.

The spokesman added that Hunt will represent the government at a private ceremony at the Guildhall, which is a joint initiative between the Israeli embassy, the Israeli National Olympic Committee and the Jewish community,” the paper reported.

Ankie Spitzer, widow of murdered Israeli fencer Andrei Spitzer, said that Lord Sebastian Coe, chair of the London Organizing Committee for the Olympic Games, had sent her an invitation to the Aug. 6 memorial event at the Guildhall.

“That’s the memorial that we are organizing ourselves! And he wrote to tell me about it?” the paper reported she angrily said.

She called the Guildhall event a “way out” for the Olympic organizers, according to the newspaper. “It means the event doesn’t have to be in the Olympic Village or during the opening ceremony, so it will let them off the hook,” she reportedly said.

Another memorial event, organized by the country’s Zionist Federation, will take place this summer as well.

More than 50 British members of Parliament have signed a motion calling for a minute’s silence. The effort is backed by the German Bundestag, about 100 members of Australia’s Parliament, the Canadian Parliament and the U.S. Senate.

Jeremy Hunt, Britain’s secretary for sports, will not call for a moment of silence at Olympics Read More »

HEALTH CARE DECISION — Jews React: Spokesperson for Los Angeles’ Saban Free Clinic

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“Obviously we’re very excited over the Supreme Court’s decision to uphold this important law. We applaud theirdecision and think it’s a huge step forward for our patients and the community,” Ray said.

“The Saban Free Clinic will continue to gear up for full health care reform, ensuring that our patients will receive quality and affordable medical care they deserve. In anticipation of health care reform in 2014, our clinic will enroll as many eligible patients as possible into the LA County no-cost health care coverage program, Healthy Way LA, so that our patients can more easily make the transition into Medi-Cal at that time.”

Healthy Way L.A. is a “no-cost health program that provides health care coverage to low-income uninsured adult citizens and legal residents” and provides a permanent home for patients at one of more than 100 clinic sites, according to the County of Los Angeles – Department of Health Services Web site.

“As health care advocates, we clinics will work to create public awareness and understanding of the law’s benefits and protections,” Ray continued. “We are here to help the community residents to enroll in Medi-Cal and obtain coverage through the California Health Benefit Exchange so that they are able to get the health care services they need.”

HEALTH CARE DECISION — Jews React: Spokesperson for Los Angeles’ Saban Free Clinic Read More »

HEALTH CARE DECISION — Jews React: Rabbi Elliot Dorff

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American individualism, at the root of some of the great blessings of freedom and pluralism of our country, is also the ultimate cause over the last half century of our inability as a nation to come together to provide health care for us all, in shameful contrast to all the other Western democracies.  President Obama’s Affordable Health Care Act (“Obamacare”)—adopted in Congress only after prodigious effort on the part of the President and his allies and at the cost of a number of members of Congress losing their seats in the subsequent 2010 election, and now approved as Constitutional by the slimmest of majorities of the Supreme Court as well—is finally going to accomplish that important end.

As American Jews, we inherit not only the American heritage of Western liberalism, but also the Jewish heritage that is much more communitarian, that requires us as a community to take care of the poor and sick in our midst.  The Jewish part of us therefore applauds loudly that we Americans have finally found a way to come together to achieve this morally important goal.

But the American part of our identity must also applaud.  American pragmatism, after all, is also part of our heritage.  Until the new legislation, people without health insurance—or who are underinsured—have gotten the services they need but in the most expensive way possible—through the emergency room.  This is not only morally problematic because it forces people to suffer the pain of diseases often for months or years before they get medical help, but it is also fiscally irresponsible.  It is no wonder that for the last 20 years we Americans have been spending 15 to 18 percent of our gross national product on health care, while Canadians, Europeans and Israelis have spent half that, and, according to annual United Nations ratings, they get much better results in health outcomes than we do. So the pragmatic, American side of us, as well as the morally insistent Jewish side of us, should celebrate the fact that we as a nation finally have a way to provide for health care for us all.

HEALTH CARE DECISION — Jews React: Rabbi Elliot Dorff Read More »

UNESCO gives Heritage status to Nativity Church, lists it under ‘Palestine’

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UNESCO has agreed to name the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem as a World Heritage Site, and list it as in Palestine.

The secret vote, which came during the United Nations body’s World Heritage Convention in St. Petersburg, Russia, was 13-6, with two abstentions.

Israel and the United States had opposed the move, seeing it as advancing the Palestinians’ political agenda rather than as an effort to protect the site.

Three Democratic members of the U.S. House of Representatives sent a letter on Thursday to Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov, urging him to oppose the resolution.

Reps. Howard Berman (D-Calif.), Shelley Berkley (D-N.V.) and Eliot Engel (D-N.Y.) wrote that “the Palestinians clearly are not motivated by technical concerns related to historical preservation, but rather are attempting to hijack the World Heritage process to further their own political objectives.”

“We do not believe UNESCO in general or the World Heritage Committee in particular is the appropriate forum for debating such contentious issues that have little to do with historic preservation,” the lawmakers wrote.

While the Palestinians police the Bethlehem’s streets, Israel still has authority to determine what enters and leaves the area.

UNESCO recognized Palestine last year as a member state by a overwhelming majority of 107-14 with objections from the U.S. and Israel.

UNESCO gives Heritage status to Nativity Church, lists it under ‘Palestine’ Read More »

June 29, 2012

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In-depth

Forging a peace plan for Syria

In an opinion piece for the Washington Post, Kofi Annan calls on the world to intervene with both sides in the Syria conflict

There is no substitute for the hard work of helping the Syrians forge their own political future, in full respect of Syria’s sovereignty, unity and territorial integrity. The international community has long agreed that any transition must be led by Syrians. We must come together to help the Syrian people embrace and achieve this future through peaceful means.

Israel’s New Politics and the Fate of Palestine

Across the political spectrum, Israel has opted to adopt neither a one-state nor a two-state solution when it comes to the conflict with the Palestinians, writes Akiva Eldar in the National Interest, and is instead implementing its own policy of status quo.

Since Israel refuses to undertake any commitment to freeze settlement, it uses the interim phases, whose purpose was to advance toward a two-state solution, to create obstacles that would impede a fair, agreed-upon partition of the territory. In the decade following the Oslo accords from 1993 to 2003, the number of West Bank settlers doubled, from 110,000 to 224,000 (not including East Jerusalem). Since then, the figure has risen to more than 340,000.

Daily Digest:

  • Times of Israel: Clinton arrives in Russia for Syria showdown

  • Jerusalem Post: Experts: Israel didn’t kill Hamas man in Damascus

  • Haaretz: Top Iran official: U.S. threats of military attack against nuclear program are empty

  • Ynet: Arab MKs: Service for all is declaration of war

  • New York Times: Holocaust Survivors Take the Runway

  • Washington Post: Turkey reinforces border with Syria; bomb explodes in Damascus

  • Wall Street Journal: Egyptians Shift Views of U.S.

    • June 29, 2012 Read More »

    Waiting Rooms, Insurance Denials and the Supreme Court

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    When our son Danny was 3-4 years old, I logged a lot of hours in the waiting room of Cedars-Sinai while he received occupational therapy, physical and speech therapy. He then had a diagnosis of “global developmental delays” which was eventually changed to cerebral palsy/apraxia.

    In those pre-smart phone days, we Moms (and an occasional Dad) didn’t have much else to do but talk to each other and often had impromptu support sessions, sharing the latest on therapies, medications, doctors, and of course, medical insurance. We were fortunate to have pretty good coverage through my husband’s aerospace employer, but the horror stories of those waiting room days stays with me.

    There was one mom, a lovely British immigrant who had premature twins, and they both had pretty severe special needs. She couldn’t stand living with her husband any longer, and wanted out of the marriage, but had to stay married in order to have insurance for her boys.  There were other parents who had Medi-Cal (California’s form of Medicaid) and wanted to get better-paying jobs, but worried that additional income would make them ineligible for Medi-Cal, and the jobs didn’t provide health insurance for dependents. Other self-employed parents couldn’t get insurance for their children since they had “pre-existing conditions” such as heart conditions.

    Even with insurance, it was a constant battle to get the right services for Danny. My bulging paper files from those days are filled with appeal letters, written by us, by physical therapists, even doctors, asking for more physical therapy, an extension of speech therapy, or a referral to an out-of-network provider. In most cases, we were successful, and when we weren’t, we paid out of pocket, sometimes with help from grandparents.

    Today’s Supreme Court ruling doesn’t solve all these problems for parents raising children with developmental delays, but it will make a difference. As the UCP Washington office wrote on their website, “The continuation of the Affordable Care Act (ACA) and its polices with ensure that children with pre-existing conditions and young adult dependent children will have access to private health insurance up to the age of 26.”

    As the ACA is implemented over time, other benefits will kick in, such as the ability of adults with disabilities who have pre-existing conditions to purchase health insurance that meets their needs, starting in 2014.

    The California Health Benefit Exchange will give individuals and small employers the ability to purchase affordable health care, also starting in 2014, and those services can include mental health, therapeutic, and other services.

    One aspect of the ACA that hasn’t been discussed much is the “Community First” option of Medicaid that started in October, 2011 which gives bonus federal dollars to states that provide in-home aides to adults with disabilities in a community setting. to encourage them to move from a nursing facility/state hospital to the community and to achieve their maximum potential.

    Even with all these benefits, however, there are many potential challenges with the ACA. As Rabbi Hershy Ten, president of Bikur Cholim Jewish Healthcare Foundation in Los Angeles told Jewish Journal reporter Julie Gruenbaum Fax, “Very few providers accept Medicaid, and there is no comprehensive list of those that do. And he said almost no specialists or surgeons accept Medicaid. Many doctors don’t even accept some nationally known private insurers, because the reimbursements are not worth their time.” (See the full article here)

    Still, as I recall those waiting room heart-to-heart talks, having something will be better than nothing for families raising a child/teen with disabilities.

    Waiting Rooms, Insurance Denials and the Supreme Court Read More »