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Stay Hopeful

Stay connected. It’s there for your asking.
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April 27, 2023
Lauren Bates / Getty Images

The other morning, I sat down to write something funny. I usually start with a fleck of an idea.  But first, I went to Yahoo to waste some time and avoid my writing.  

 Here is what I saw: 

A shooter wielding two assault-style rifles and a pistol killed three students and three adults at a private Christian school in Nashville.

The slain children were Evelyn Dieckhaus, Hallie Scruggs, and William Kinney, all age nine. The adults were Cynthia Peak, Mike Hill, and Katherine Koonce.  All in their sixties.

If I wanted to, I could have continued writing funny.  It’s what I do. Like so many of us, I’ve learned to tuck away bad news.

But today was different. This one did not just nail my shoes to the floor. This nail went right through my foot. There have been many of these shootings. This is the one that seemed to split my heart in half. Perhaps because my life is peppered with young people, the thought of a young person’s life being cut so short was sickening. Perhaps because my wife and I are in the same age range as the adults murdered, I know how much more they had left to do. And how much more love they had to share. For these families, that’s all come to a screeching halt. 

I stared blankly. Staring back at me, my computer screen was waiting. I felt I was being asked to make a choice.  I could either look inside or I could snap my heart back together and move on as if nothing happened.  This, to me, was a personal moment. A fork in the road. Am I human or am I stone? 

The illusion that this can’t happen to my family, Jewish community, or me has long been shattered. And not next week or tomorrow, perhaps right at this minute, someone I know and love is being torn from us.  Maybe when I step out of my front door to get the mail, it will be my turn. 

Recently, two Jewish people four blocks from my home in the very Jewish Pico Robertson neighborhood were shot because they dared to be Jewish in public. Thank God, they did not die. They caught the nut job, but we know he’s one of many. We have all become part of one big live Whack-a-Mole game. 

And who are the perpetrators of these crimes? A day doesn’t roll by that I don’t see some deranged person on my block or at most, a few blocks away. They are the walking dead and seem to have nothing left to lose.  

I’ve yet to hear solutions from the four P’s. Pulpit, politicians, police, or psychologists.  So, what do I do? How do I protect my family, my friends and myself?  Will buying a gun put an end to all this? Will the gun help if a local gang decides to rip my front door off after an earthquake?  

Many years ago, I was in a mindset where I felt hopeless, unloved, unlovable, detached, and ready to screw life if this is as good as it gets. But because I had a family, community, friends and God, I eventually returned to my senses. I had an ongoing source of connection to keep me grounded.

Rabbi Norman Lamm said, “Mankind is not disposable or replaceable. We have a purpose in this life.”

Stay connected to other people. To family. To community. To friends.  We see what happens when people drift away from their relationships. We see what they turn into. 

One such purpose is to stay attached at all costs. What do I mean by that? I mean…stay connected to other people. To family. To community. To friends.  We see what happens when people drift away from their relationships. We see what they turn into. A person alone with nothing to live for is signing a contract with the devil.

But a young man or woman kissing the Torah or taking communion is hopefully signing a contract with God to try to be a better person. They’re declaring that they believe in a better future. That there is something to hope for. Church and synagogue — these are places of connection. It’s where people stay attached to God and their communities. Last week at synagogue, I saw so many wonderful things that gave me hope. Stay connected. It’s there for your asking.


Mark Schiff is a comedian, actor and writer, and host of the ‘You Don’t Know Schiff’ podcast. His new book is “Why Not? Lessons on Comedy, Courage and Chutzpah.”

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