September 20, 2019

I Whip My Hair, Beard, and JewFro

First there was Jaden Smith, son of powerhouse couple Will and Jada Smith, in that god-awful “coat on/coat off” remake of Karate Kid. Clearly, this is how that movie was conceived.

Jaden: Daddy, can I be in another movie, this time without you telling me exactly what to do like you did in The Pursuit of Happyness? Karate Kid is my all time favorite!

Will: Sure, son. You’re so handsome. You’ll look just like me when you grow up! I’ll make some calls.

The result was one of the worst castings in one of the worst remakes in movie history. Jaden was way too self-conscious as an actor, evident in those Paris Hilton-esque lip-puckers in almost every scene. And he was way too small and scrawny for a character who’s supposed to kick Chinese butt and fall for a pretty Asian girl at least a foot taller than him.  (Yes, they kiss. Spoiler. Good. Don’t see it.)

Now there’s his little sister, Willow Smith and her gargantuan hit, “Whip My Hair.”