4 years ago, under the sweltering heat of Nineveh in the Kurdish region of Northern Iraq, the small city of Sinjar came under attack by ISIS forces. The Kurdish Peshmerga fighters, caught off guard, retreated, abandoning the civilians of Sinjar without warning.
The outcome was devastating. Thousands massacred. Women and children taken into slavery. A population dissolved by evil.
Of course, all this appeared in the headlines, it flashed across our television screens but beneath the surface of the stream of breaking news from this tormented region, live a people whose lives have been shattered to pieces by daily tragedy.
The horrors are unimaginable, the evil seemingly unstoppable and the trauma almost insurmountable, nevertheless, as always, wherever there is human peril there are stories of human virtue.
This story is about Lisa Miara. Born and raised in the UK, but currently residing in the Shariya refugee camp, Lisa has spent the past several years trying to save the lives, literally, of thousands of Yazidi refugees from both mortal danger and the agony of their trauma. Through her foundation, Springs of Hope, Lisa works restlessly to provide the displaced Yazidi people with hope and purpose.
The “Roseanne” spinoff “The Conners” will kill off her character, but Roseanne Barr isn’t planning to stick around for her demise. In a new appearance on his podcast, Barr told Rabbi Shmuley Boteach that she plans to be In Israel when the ABC series premieres Oct. 12.
“I have an opportunity to go to Israel for a few months and study with my favorite teachers over there, and that’s where I’m going to go and probably move somewhere there and study with my favorite teachers,” she said. “I have saved a few pennies and I’m so lucky I can go … and study with any rabbi that I can ask to teach me, and it’s my great joy and privilege to be a Jewish woman.”
Barr has been under fire since her racist tweet about former Barack Obama aide Valerie Jarrett prompted ABC’s swift cancellation of “Roseanne,” and while she apologized, she said she regrets doing so publicly.
“I should never have said I’m sorry in their world. In my world, I had to because I was sorry…People were so angry and, I have to say, a little bit ill-informed about me that they would put me in the same box where they have people who call for the death of all Jews and want to enslave all black people — real racists that actually exist. They put me in this box with them, and how do they think that’s going to affect me? They don’t, and they’re under mind control.”
She said she’s been going through a mourning period since the cancellation of the “Roseanne” reboot. “It was a death to me. The death of a character I created.” But she said that she will not “curse it or bless” the show and plans on “staying neutral. “I’m staying away from it. Not wishing bad on anyone and I don’t wish good for my enemies,” she said.
She revealed that she recently went to Nashville to record music and is developing a new sitcom. “I’m very excited,” she said. “It’s very funny.”
Here is my August News 2018 FOR We Said Go Travel:
For my 50 New Things Before I am 50 project, I went to my 96, 97, 98, 99th countries and in July 2018, I went to TANZANIA which was my country #100! It was so exciting to travel with Abercrombie and Kent Tailor-Made Small Group Journeys on Safari! I have been posting photos to my social media and have many videos to share with you. Thank you for all of your support for We Said Go Travel and me.
We anticipate announcing the winners from our 2017 Photo Award in September 2018. Thank you for your participation and patience!
Our 2018 photo award is open! Our four judges look forward to seeing your best shots! Learn more here!
On Safari in Africa! Baby Elephant Crossing the Road
WHERE CAN YOU FIND MY TRAVEL VIDEOS?
Here are links to my video channels on YouTube, Amazon Fire Tv, and Roku Player. My views on Roku are now over 1.2 million and I have nearly 800,000 views on YouTube! My total video views across all platforms is now over two million! Thank you for your support!
I am now planning and booking travel! Where do you want to wander? Find more information about me and my luxury travel advising as an independent affiliate of CRUISE and RESORT, Inc with Virtuoso Luxury Travel Network on my new microsite!
My fortune cookies said “Dreams are extremely important. You can’t do it unless you imagine it,” and “A mile walked with a friend contains only a hundred steps.” I hope you are actively imagining your next dream destination and goal. I am!
”What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow: our life is the creation of our mind.”
So is it recorded in The Dhammapada, a collection of sayings of the Buddha who lived 2600 years ago.
Shakespeare expressed the same idea: “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” [1]
Are they both right, that we are mind over matter?
Not according to Jonathan Haidt, Professor of Ethical Leadership at NYU’s Stern School of Business. He writes that the conscious, reasoning part of our mind has only limited control over what we think, feel and do. [2]
The problem, he says, is that the mind is divided into two parts that often conflict. We are like riders on the back of elephants. Our conscious and rational mind has only limited control of what the elephant beneath us does.
The elephant represents our gut feelings, visceral reactions, emotions and intuitions. The rider is like the ‘press agent’ for the President (i.e. the elephant) who rationalizes whatever the president says.
The elephant and rider each have its own intelligence, and when the two work together, they reveal human brilliance. However, they don’t always work together.
As we approach the High Holidays, we Jews turn and return, break from habits that keep us from change and growth, and respond in new ways to those around us, to events in the world, and to our own lives.
The goal of t’shuvah (i.e. turning, returning, and responding) is to restore ourselves to where we know we should be, to our loved ones, families and friends, to colleagues and community, Torah and Judaism, goodness and God. This season reminds us that we ought to look beyond our material needs to our spiritual ones and focus on that which elevates us to be just “a little lower than the angels.” [3]
Haidt reminds us that when the Rider and the Elephant are at cross purposes – we ought to retrain the elephant, and that’s not so easy. The elephant is wired by nature, nurture and ingrained patterns and it doesn’t seem that it matters what our conscious minds, our reason and good yetzer (inclination) are telling us. The rider often has little control over the elephant beneathe our legs.
Haidt urges the rider to talk directly to the elephant.
Was Shakespeare right that “There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so”?
I answer this way – that the challenge of this season isn’t to insist that the rider have the final word, but to redirect the elephant’s impulses to be more in tune with the rider’s vision and purpose. Haidt suggests three means to do so:
Meditation – to quiet the mind and detach from whatever drives us towards dysfunctional and destructive behavior;
Cognitive therapy – to dig into our motivations, unconscious impulses and hidden agendas, and “unpack” the baggage that we carry, the memories and hurts that taught us that the world works in such and such a way, and that if we’re to survive we better behave accordingly;
Biochemical support – I’m not a psychiatrist, but those who think that drug therapy would be helpful should consult with qualified mental health professionals.
Each strategy has its place. There’s no one means to effect t’shuvah. Change and growth don’t come suddenly. T’shuvah involves a deliberate step-by-step process taken over time with patience and perseverance.
The elephant operates from a subterranean unconscious mishmash of forces. Given its size and weight, it’s likely that we may only be able to direct it forward slowly. What’s necessary is to retrain ourselves that we might become more optimistic and positive.
“Life is what we deem it,” is the truth of t’shuvah. We CAN redeem ourselves, but it won’t be easy!
Notes:
[1] Hamlet – Act 2, Scene 2
[2] “The Happiness Hypothesis: Finding Modern Truth in Ancient Wisdom” and “The Righteous Mind – Why Good People are Divided by Politics and Religion”
[Ed. Note: As we approach Rosh HaShanah, here is an entry that offers hope and a positive story. All of us at Kavod v’Nichum offer you wishes for a Shenah Tovah Umetukah! May you be inscribed and sealed for a year of blessings. — JB]
Once upon a time, on a most average, ordinary day, I received a call from a local Rabbi asking if I was available to go immediately to the ER at a local hospital as an elderly Jewish woman was imminently expected to die… and her husband of 60 years was distraught as he stood near her gurney.
In that brief phone call … minus many details … I was informed that this very day was their anniversary. The plan had been that they would renew their vows later this evening. But as we know, often we make plans and G-D laughs.
As I changed from my jeans to more appropriate “clergy/chaplain” clothes my hubby gathered some flowers from our yard, a small glass and a little bottle of grape juice. With these items in hand, off I went to the ER.
Security guards ushered me to the correct bay, and upon my entering this cubicle, the two non-Jewish chaplains left.
So, there I was with the distraught husband, and his wife who was as white as the sheet she was laying on. I held the wife’s hand as I asked the husband to repeat a very very very condensed version of a renewal ceremony – made up on the spot!!
Concluding this ceremony with the shehechiyanu prayer, expressing thanks that they DID reach THIS day, I began to ask him about his years with her. I asked, “what was the most memorable moment that you can recall?” He responded that it was their trip to Israel the year before.
We talked about the various cities and towns where they stayed, and I asked if they had any relatives in Israel. Nope – not a one. My follow-up question was, “What in Israel moved your wife the most?” He quickly responded, “the Kotel.”
With that answer he was moved to obvious emotion. But this obvious emotion paled compared to the emotion he demonstrated when SHE responded, “the Kotel!”
This sick, frail, and dying woman somehow gathered the inner strength to say, though admittedly in a whisper, “The Kotel.”
The fact that this woman had heard us, could respond and defy the odds was strange enough. The devoted, loyal, distraught, husband NEARLY had his own medical emergency when he heard her speak. He had to catch himself from falling!
With that one unbelievable phrase – “the Kotel” – one has to wonder what the powers that be – let be. Why would THIS conversation have the power to elicit strength that was just moments before absent? How is it that she must have heard all the previous discussions, prayers, and her husband’s pleas for her to get better, but all that for naught, and yet she heard THIS question?
The doctors were sure that death was a certainty, the chaplains were offering comfort and words of early condolence, and the husband was told to call the funeral home and “make necessary plans.” I am the Roshah of the Chevrah Kadisha in this community, and I would put out the call at news of a death.
And yet, the mention of the Kotel stirred her, emotionally and physically. Slowly, color returned to her face, and ever so slowly she began to “look” less at deaths door.
Her husband recounted to her that they had just had a Renewal of Vows, that it was in fact the day of their anniversary, and he was moved to tears that she appeared better.
With that I left the cubicle.
Outside the cubicle, several feet away, the two Christian chaplains were nonplussed and flummoxed, to say the least. Having overheard that she spoke, they wanted to know the Jewish Secret – what had I done? I simply told them “Kotel,” and left!
I did learn that the elderly, imminently going-to-die woman was released to home after 3 days – showing the power of Hashem, miracles, good luck, coincidence.
Laurie Dinerstein-Kurs hails from Brooklyn, currently living in NJ. Having originally learned about Taharah as a yeshiva student, I knew I would participate as soon as the opportunity presented itself. I have participated in doing Taharah for almost 30 years. I am currently the ROSHAH of our chevrah. When not doing Taharah, I taught school – up until I retired and went back to school and became a chaplain. I held the Federation position of County (Mercer) Chaplain for 15 years. My two children have blessed us with grandchildren.
Rabbi Laurie Dinnerstein-Kurs
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Gamliel Courses
The next course in the cycle of core courses offered by the Gamliel Institute will be Course 4 – Nechama/Comfort. It will be offered online during the Fall from October 9th to December 25th on Tuesday evenings, for 90 minutes each week for 12 weeks. The classes will begin at 5 pm PST/8 pm EST. Primary instructors will be Dan Fendel and Edna Stewart, with guest instructors.
The course planned for Winter 2019 is Course 2 – Chevrah Kadisha: Taharah & Shmirah. Plan ahead!
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Gamliel Café
Gamliel Students are invited to a free informal online session, held monthly. On the third (3rd) THURSDAY of each month, different person(s) will offer a short teaching or share some thoughts on a topic of interest to them, and those who are online will have a chance to respond, share their own stories and information, and build our Gamliel Institute community connections. This initiative is being headed up by Rena Boroditsky and Rick Light. You should receive email reminders monthly. The next scheduled session of the Gamliel Café is September 20th. More details will be sent out soon.
Gamliel students should be on the lookout for information on a series of Gamliel Continuing Education Courses, advanced sessions focusing in on different topics. These will usually be in groups of three ninety minute sessions (three consecutive Wednesdays) offered roughly twice yearly, with different topics addressed in each series. The goal is to look at these topics in more depth than possible during the core courses. The first course took place in Fall 2017, focusing on Psalms, and the second was on The World to Come and the Zohar.
The next course will be November 28th, December 5th, and December 12th. We will continue to look at death as seen in the Zohar, taught by Beth Huppin.
Registration is required, and there will be a tuition charge of $72 for each three session series. Contact us for information, by email info@jewish-funerals.org, or call 410-733-3700, or simply register online at www.jewish-funerals.org/gamreg/.
You can also register for prior courses and access them via recording.
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Taste of Gamliel Series
The 2018 Taste of Gamliel series has concluded, but it is not too late if you want to access the recordings. You can Register for the 2018 series, Your’re Gonna Miss Me When I’m Gone: Jewish Practices of Remembrance, or any of the series from prior years, and view them in recordings. There are usually five sessions in a series, and each session is approximately 90 minutes.
The 2019 series is being planned now. Registration for Taste of Gamliel is mandatory to access the sessions. The Registration fee of $36 for each series helps us defray the out of pocket costs.
Those registered will be sent the information on how to connect to the sessions. To register, click here: register.
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DONATIONS
Donations are always needed and most welcome to support the work of Kavod v’Nichum and the Gamliel Institute, helping us to bring you the annual conference, offer community trainings, provide scholarships to students, refurbish and update course materials, expand our teaching, support programs such as Taste of Gamliel, the Gamliel Café, and the Gamliel Continuing Education courses, provide and add to online resources, encourage and support communities in establishing, training, and improving their Chevrah Kadisha, and assist with many other programs and activities. There is a matching donation program in progress so your dollars go further. See the website for details.
c/o David Zinner, Executive Director, Kavod v’Nichum,
8112 Sea Water Path,
Columbia, MD 21045.
Kavod v’Nichum and the Gamliel Institute] are recognized and registered 501(c)(3) organization, and donations may be tax-deductible to the full extent provided by law. Call 410-733-3700 if you have any questions or want to know more about supporting Kavod v’Nichum or the Gamliel Institute.
Please note: this blog depends on you for content. Without you it cannot publish new material. If you have an idea for an entry you would like to submit to this blog, please be in touch. Email J.blair@jewish-funerals.org. We are always interested in original unpublished materials that would be of interest to our readers, relating to the broad topics surrounding the continuum of Jewish preparation, planning, rituals, rites, customs, practices, activities, and celebrations approaching the end of life, at the time of death, during the funeral, in the grief and mourning process, and in comforting those dying and those mourning, as well as the actions and work of those who address those needs, including those serving in Bikkur Cholim, Caring Committees, the Chevrah Kadisha, as Shomrim, funeral providers, in funeral homes and mortuaries, and operators and maintainers of cemeteries.
