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December 21, 2016

William Novak’s new joke book teaches us how to ‘Die Laughing’

An elderly gentleman, well dressed, walks into an upscale cocktail lounge.  He sits down next to an elegant woman of a certain age and orders a drink. Turning to her, he says, “So tell me, do I come here often?”

While exercising one day, William Novak, who is in his 60s, had an idea.

It occurred to him that a compilation of jokes about the “golden years” might make a 24-karat book. He stopped what he was doing and, of course, wrote down the idea so he wouldn’t forget it. His wife, Linda, came up with the title: “Die Laughing: Killer Jokes for Newly Old Folks.”

Writing the book was hardly a stretch for Novak. He is the co-editor of “The Big Book of Jewish Humor” (1981). In the 35 years since that classic, Novak became a best-selling ghost writer, co-authoring memoirs of famous figures including Lee Iacocca and Magic Johnson.  

He also is surrounded by a very funny family.

“Everyone in my family seems to be funny,” Novak said, “and Linda was voted ‘wittiest’ in her high school class … something she hasn’t reminded me of since yesterday.”

The couple co-parent three sons (all of whom, Novak said, are funny), including B.J. Novak, who starred as Ryan Howard in TV’s “The Office.”

B.J. Novak agrees with his dad’s assessment.

“When I was a kid, I assumed that every family was funny,” B.J. Novak told the Jewish Journal, “that all families relied on jokes, laughter and warm sarcasm to communicate, and that all parents had a big collection of joke books. A lot of our dinner conversations started with, ‘Wouldn’t it be funny if …” Looking back, I realize that we were a little unusual. But I’m glad I grew up speaking the language of humor.”

While “Die Laughing” is not totally composed of Jewish jokes, when a story starts with “Shirley, a widow, decided to take her cat to the beach,” or “After the death of his wife, Silverman marries a much younger woman …” we pretty much know we’re talking about Members of the Tribe.

Then there are the more explicit references:

A Jewish woman who has just moved into a new apartment invites her adult grandson to dinner. “Go to the front door,” she tells him on the phone, “press 9-D with your elbow, and I’ll buzz you in. When you get off the elevator, turn right and press the doorbell with your elbow. Come at seven o’clock.”

“Sure,” he says. “But why should I press those buttons with my elbow?”

“What? You’re coming empty-handed?!” 

Why so much kosher comedy? “When you think of jokes and old people,” William Novak said, “you don’t even need the word ‘Jewish’; it’s obvious! But why are Jews funny is a big, complicated question. I’ve never figured out a great answer, except that Jews are often very smart, and I’ve never seen anyone who’s funny who wasn’t smart.”

As he pondered the question, Novak dug deeper. “Also, Jews look at things from different angles. Our tradition of biblical and talmudic commentary encourages us to see things from different points of view, and not to take surface truths as the only truth. What is humor, if not looking at something in a different way?”

The woman was in tears when she came to the rabbi. “Esther, I see that you’re grieving. How can I help you?”

“Rabbi, my dog died yesterday, and it would mean so much if you’d do the funeral.”

“I’m sorry,” the rabbi said, “but I can only hold a service for a person.”

“Please, rabbi. I’m alone in the world and Cooper meant everything to me. I’m also prepared to make a substantial donation to the synagogue.”

The rabbi eventually gave in and held a small funeral service in her backyard, and gave a beautiful eulogy.

When it was over, Esther said, “Rabbi, that was everything I was hoping for. It was so moving. And I thought I knew everything about Cooper, but honestly, I had no idea how much he had done for Israel!” 

Choosing the material to be included in the book was a family affair. B.J. Novak — who, in addition to his acting career, is an author, screenwriter and director — said that when his father was almost finished, “I was one of those lucky people who got to vote on the jokes and cartoons he was considering. Voting for cartoons is one job that nobody would turn down. It may have been a favor to him, but it felt more like a gift to me. I’m so glad he wrote the book and that it turned out so well.”

So as we age, is laughter the best medicine? 

“No,” William Novak shot back, “the best medicine usually comes in a bottle or pill. But I was surprised how many studies there have been about the healing power of laughter. It’s not just fun; it’s one of the antidotes to illness and even aging. It keeps us younger, happier, more optimistic, more flexible and more productive.”

“I always quote the famous talmudic phrase, which doesn’t really exist:  Blessed is the person who lives in a funny family.”

A little old man hobbled into the ice cream parlor and slowly made his way to the counter. After pausing a moment to catch his breath, he ordered a chocolate sundae.

“Crushed nuts?” asked the waitress.

“No. Arthritis.”


Steve North is a longtime broadcast and print journalist.

William Novak’s new joke book teaches us how to ‘Die Laughing’ Read More »

How 486 frames transformed the Zapruder Family

“Twenty-Six Seconds: A Personal History of the Zapruder Film” by Alexandra Zapruder (Twelve) is a wholly unique family memoir and a fascinating monograph about one of the most consequential artifacts in recorded history, the 486 frames of 8 mm color movie film that Abraham Zapruder shot in Dallas on Nov. 22, 1963.

The author is Abe Zapruder’s granddaughter, and she explains how “the film,” as it was known in her family, embedded itself in her consciousness in distorting and disturbing ways. “When viewed from inside our family, the film was marginal, of little significance compared to the memory of a beloved patriarch who died too young,” she explains. “But strangers’ curiosity and prying calls from the media had a way of pushing it into view, emphasizing our family’s connection to the film in ways that were hard to ignore. … As I got older, I must have wondered about this thing called the Zapruder film: Why did people keep bringing it up if it wasn’t all that important, and what did other people know about it that I didn’t?”

For Alexandra Zapruder, then, the book started as a quest to understand the origins and exploits of her own family and the extraordinary web of mystery and conspiracy that has attached itself to the little can of Kodak film that bears her surname, which captured the moment President John F. Kennedy was assassinated. As told in “Twenty-Six Seconds,” it is a story of how one human being can be unexpectedly caught up in history and, far beyond that, carried into one of our most enduring myths.

Her account is full of little ironies and telling moments. She confirms the oft-told tale of how Zapruder left his camera behind when he set out for Dealey Plaza on that fateful day, but she also points out “just how predictable it was that he would leave the camera at home and that [his wife] Lillian would talk him into going back to get it.” 

Lillian gave all of the employees at the family’s dress company a long lunch so they could watch the motorcade, and her PA announcement is a reminder that Dallas was deeply divided over JFK on the day of his visit: “We don’t care what your religion is or your politics,” Lillian said. “It doesn’t make any difference whether you agree with him or not. He’s still the president.” 

And the author points out that her grandfather, who was watching the presidential motorcade through the zoom lens of a camera, was the first person in the world to glimpse and understand the horror that was taking place before his eyes. 

The Zapruder film was instantly elevated into the holy grail of the Kennedy assassination. Zapruder himself insisted on entering the darkroom where the “in camera” original was developed and ensured that only three copies were made. The Dallas Morning News offered to pay $200 per frame for the most horrific images. Hours later, photographers from the Saturday Evening Post offered to pay $10,000 merely for an introduction to Zapruder. 

True to the promise Zapruder had made immediately after the assassination, however, the first recipients were the Dallas Police Department and the Secret Service. Only later, and fatefully, did Zapruder meet Richard Stolley, the Los Angeles bureau chief of Life magazine, who offered the buy the rights to the much-sought-after film.

Here is the crux of “Twenty-Six Seconds.”  Zapruder literally had nightmares about the moral repercussions that would follow a sale of the film. “His childhood experiences of anti-Semitism had taught him that those who hated Jews could turn anything into a reason to attack, humiliate and shame,” the author writes of her grandfather. “What was easier for an anti-Semite than accusing a Jew of profiteering.” But she insists that the Life deal “offered him a safe harbor in a sea of sharks,” a category in which she places Dan Rather and CBS.  

“No one was going to come out of this a saint, but maybe there was a way to come out whole, moral fiber intact, liberated from the film, and maybe a little better off financially than he had been before.” To put the transaction in the best light, she reports, Zapruder donated the first  $25,000 check from Life to the Dallas Policemen’s and Firemen’s Welfare Fund for the family of Patrolman J.D. Tippit, the less celebrated of Lee Harvey Oswald’s victims. (Zapruder was paid a total of $150,000 from Life.)

She decorates her account of the Zapruder film with stories about “Mr. Zee,” as he was known to his employees, from an adjective into a flesh-and-blood human. Born in Ukraine in 1905, Abe reached New York City in 1920 and settled on Beaver Street in “Jewish Brooklyn.” By 1940, he moved his family to Dallas, where he’d been offered a position as the “inside man” at a dress manufacturing business. By 1962, he was the owner of Jennifer Juniors, where “in the beginning, he cleaned the toilets and swept the floors himself.” According to his granddaughter, Zapruder used to buy haute couture dresses from Neiman Marcus on his wife’s credit card, keep them overnight in order to take snapshots, “and then — in an impressive act of chutzpah — return the dresses for a refund before finishing the knockoffs to sell.” 

Still, “Twenty-Six Seconds” always returns to the long and strange life of the Zapruder film itself, which has included media wars, Dickensian lawsuits, the big-screen distortions of Oliver Stone’s “JFK,” and even that memorable episode of Seinfeld in which “the magic bullet” becomes “the magic loogie.” Even when it comes to pure satire, in fact, the author recognizes that the satire “reflected decades of endless analysis, scrutiny, argument, and ultimately unresolved questions about the Zapruder film and the assassination,” all of which are explored in depth in her remarkable book.

So much has been written and said about the Kennedy assassination that a reader might wonder what is left to be said. In the pages of “Twenty-Six Seconds,” Alexandra Zapruder says it. 


JONATHAN KIRSCH, author and publishing attorney, is the book editor of the Jewish Journal.

How 486 frames transformed the Zapruder Family Read More »

WATCH: Reflections on the Berlin Intifada

A few months ago, I wrote my unexpected “>translated into German and then went viral. I pleaded with Germany to take care of me, to continue to provide me with a wonderful place to live, as a modern Israeli and Jew. It was written to prevent exactly the moment I describe in this video. Now, it seems, I must work harder, but hopefully the work will be easier now, for a reason I highlight: