Candlelighting: Week of June 24, 2011
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June 24, 2011
Netanyahu: Israel to toughen conditions of Palestinian prisoners
Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu announced Thursday that he plans on toughening the conditions of Palestinian security prisoners in Israel’s prisons.
“I have decided to change Israel’s treatment of terrorists sitting in prison,” Netanyahu said during the closing statements at the Presidential Conference in Jerusalem. “We will give them all that they deserve according to international law but nothing beyond that.”
Netanyahu said that he is required to respect Israeli law, international law, and international trust but nothing beyond that, so Israel is taking a series of steps to change prisoners’ conditions.
Read more at Haaretz.com.
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Two Accused Calabasas High Vandals Appear in Court
Two of the three Calabasas High School students charged last month with defacing their school with anti-Semitic and racist graffiti in April appeared in juvenile court in Sylmar on Thursday, June 23, a spokesperson from the Los Angeles County District Attorney’s office told the Jewish Journal.
The attorneys for the two students denied the petition filed by the district attorney. This action, which is the equivalent of an adult’s pleading not guilty to a charge, is typical in juvenile cases.
Because they are minors, the students’ identities are being kept confidential. In the days immediately following the discovery of the graffiti, a spokesman for the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department said that all three were “4.0 students,” a fact that could prove relevant to the sentences each one could receive.
“Each kid may not get the same sentence, depending on their prior histories,” George I. Kita, a juvenile defense lawyer based in Cerritos not involved in the trial, said. Sentences could range from forced community service to confinement in a Division of Juvenile Justice facility.
In cases that involve racism or prejudice, Kita said, Judges often impose sentences that include visits to educational facilities like the Museum of Tolerance. The goal, Kita said, “is not just to hand down a punishment. It’s also to rehabilitate the child as well.”
The two students who appeared in court today are set to reappear there in September. The third student charged in connection with the graffiti is scheduled to appear for the first time in the same courtroom on June 30.
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A Friend Indeed
Support for families raising a child with special needs can take many forms.
When Danny was around 3 years old and we realized that his “developmental delays” weren’t temporary, we began to more actively seek out help and advice. A family we had known for years with a teenager who had intellectual disabilities took us out to dinner and shared the twists and turns of their own challenging journey. Family members offered to help pay for expensive therapies. And a total stranger volunteered to come to over to our home once a week as part of the then “Family Friends” program at Jewish Family Service.
Herb Ehrmann, a successful retired attorney who had been personally touched with his own children with special needs first entered our lives 13 years ago, and still comes over once a week in the evening to provide us with some “time off” or respite from parenting a child with significant disabilities. He is always exactly on time, and invariably in a good mood.
Over the years, Danny and he have developed their own little rituals, such as eating certain food, (for many years Danny called him “Herb Toast”), and watching baseball or basketball on TV, something Danny never does with anyone else.
We usually use those precious free hours to go to the gym and have a good workout, often followed by frozen yogurt (if we are feeling virtuous) or ice cream (when we are not). Other times, we use the time to hear a lecture or see a movie, re-entering the world of ideas and culture outside of our respective work areas.
As with any close friend, we experienced good times together, such as Herb’s marriage to his lovely wife, Connie, and summer evenings in their Jacuzzi, as well as the darker, sadder parts of life.
In addition to coming over to our house once a week, Herb also volunteers for Chaverim, the social/recreational program also provided by JFS (with partial Federation funding). He takes the adults bowling, and goes away overnight with them on Shabbatons and other special events.
This Sunday, Herb is being honored at the10th Annual Shining Star Fundraiser for his 20 years of “generous and dedicated service” to Chaverim at 2 pm at the Milken Community Campus, 22622 Vanowen Street in West Hills.The program will feature a special performance by the Chaverim Singers, silent and live auctions and appetizers & desserts.
For us, Herb has become a very close family friend indeed and we wish him Mazel Tov on this well-deserved honor.
Left out of the Picture, Looking at Our Navels
Today’s LA Times lead article headlines a “strong increase” in the past decade in non-traditional families such as single parent families, unmarried partners and and same-sex partners. Whats happening with the Jews? The census doesn’t capture information on religion because of strictures of Church/State separation. That’s a good thing.
Whats bad is that the Jewish community has no idea of whether anything has changed in more than 14 years. While Thomas Jefferson’s decennial US census creates a new vision of reality, current Jewish communal policy and planning is based on anecdotes and assumptions colored by Anetevka.
So, Jewish community, study something cheap and easy, say Jewish start-up organizations. All the information can be gathered from the Internet. No messy, time-consuming interviews with thousands of plain old people.
The trumpeted study of Jewish non-profit organizational start-ups found dearth of social service organizations among the start-ups featured in the survey.
A study co-author Shawn Landres said,
Jews already do social service work quite well and the impact of a new start up might be limited. Second, although the new generation of Jewish start-ups might not be focusing on social service provision in their hometowns, many individuals and organizations are doing important work in the developing world.
It is more fun to get on an jet and be the photogenic exotic abroad and the brave returning hero at home. Its more messy to deal with violent couple living nearby or the festering wounds that can’t find adequate treatment or facilities locally.
Its no wonder that the Jewish injunction is “The poor of your city, first.” If no one ever looks, through an organized scientific survey, to see if there are such Jewish people around, then its easy to look elsewhere for challenges and sexier funding opportunities.
Federation President Jay Sanderson, who moderated the panel, said it would be difficult for start-ups to compete with larger organizations — like the one he leads — when it comes to courting donors.
I hope Sanderson dresses well and arrives in style when he goes acourtin’.
Pini Herman serves as President of the Movable Minyan a lay-lead independent congregation in the 3rd Street area.
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You Have the Freedom to Illuminate Yourself
B’not Mitzvah
Last Saturday was beautiful, profound and meaningful. I spent my afternoon in Shabbat services, enlivening my spirit through singing, reading prayers, and dancing. I was decompressing and cleansing myself of the stresses of the week. Two women in their 50’s were having their B’not Mitzvah, which I came to learn is when two or more women are having a Bat Mitzvah together. Nicole was given the Hebrew name Nechama, which means comfort, and Beverly was given Batya, which means daughter of G-d. The Torah portion that the women flawlessly read was Shelach Lecha, which was when Moses sent out 12 spies, one from each tribe, to scout out the Promised Land (Bamidbar 14: 1-10). During Nechama and Batya’s B’not Mitzvah speeches, I was touched when both women turned towards one another to express whole heartedly how they now saw each other as sisters, cultivated through the bond that they shared while preparing for such a pivotal day in their lives.
California Institute for Women
What was especially profound about the Shabbat service was the juxtaposition between it being such a peaceful space, yet when I looked through the window just behind the women, I saw a very different world. It was a vast space surrounded by barbed wire and with prison guards carrying guns. The service was held at the California Institute for Women, which is a prison in Corona. Rabbi Moshe Halfon, who is the Jewish Chaplain of the facility, led the service. You could see within the eyes of both Nechama and Batya, and all the other incarcerated women in the room, how incredibly meaningful the service was to them. It was very apparent to me that the women were not taking Shabbat for granted, and made the most out of the opportunity to experience some spiritual healing, peace and comfort. They were very present and engaged. It was truly beautiful.
I was witnessing how the power of Judaism has the ability to bring such light and love to the spirits of all these women, despite the nature of the external prison that surrounds them.
Back-story
You may be wondering how I ended up spending my Shabbat services at a Women’s prison, and so I want to give you the short version of why I became fascinated and inspired to potentially do social work within the incarcerated population. Four years ago, if you were to ask me how I felt about people who were incarcerated, I would have given you a judgmental response with a sense of superiority. Over the past few years as I have gotten the chance to really connect and bond with people who have been incarcerated, it has helped me to shed my judgmental side, and be more compassionate and understanding. I cultivated a profound friendship with someone who had recently gotten out of prison after having served 24 years for planning a robbery that had led to a murder. Given her background, one could easily feel uncomfortable in her presence; however the integrity and spiritual wisdom she exudes creates the exact opposite effect. I was at the Shabbat services at CIW because I want to continue to learn the powerful lessons that I get from being around that population. The moment that I feel any sense of superiority towards another human being, I loose my connection to G-d and to myself.
Enslavement
Both Batya and Nechama talked about the enslavement of the Jews in Egypt and the exodus led by Moses, and compared it to the enslavement of their destructive choices and the exodus from living a life of crime. They were choosing to live holy lives, even within the walls of the prison. There were women in the room who were serving life sentences, and will never get the chance to step outside the walls of the prison, yet they had beaming smiles because they understood that they still had the freedom to make the exodus from their internal prison. I believe that almost everyone to a certain extent has experienced some form of imprisonment by our internal struggles. Sometimes we are not even aware of it.
As I sat in the room, I found myself wrestling at different moments with discomfort, however the cause was totally separate of the fact that I was literally in a prison. I wasn’t sure why I was so uncomfortable in my skin, but I knew it was coming from a place of fear and doubt caused by feelings of inadequacy. At one point, as I was standing in the back of the room and watching the women singing and dancing, I thought to myself about how ironic it was that I was feeling as though I was the most uncomfortable person in the room, even though I live such a chaos free and sheltered life in comparison. It is important to me to be non-judgmental, empathetic, and loving towards everyone, however I am not always that way with myself.
Learning About Myself
Beyond my fears and doubts, and the misconceptions that sometimes come along with them, I really do know who I am and believe that I am a great person who is very dedicated and passionate about making a positive impact on others. Although having fears and doubts at times is very normal and a part of the human experience, I know that I shouldn’t feel it as much as I do. Fear and doubt often holds me back from reaching my highest potential. I become stuck in the past, holding onto old ways of thinking, and unable to see things as they truly are. I have missed out on a lot beautiful moments because I was too stuck in the prison in my head. Going back to school has helped me to shed light on why at times I become unaware of or feel disconnected from my own true nature. It has helped empower me to truly be stronger in myself.
Knowledge is Power
Through working hard to gain a greater sense of inner peace and wholeness, I now get the truth behind the saying “knowledge is power.” So far, my education at ” title=”The Media Awareness Network” target=”_blank”>The Media Awareness Network “Too often networks and film companies shy away from portraying gays and lesbians for fear of alienating or offending advertisers, investors, and audiences.” Unfortunately there is some validity to their concern because of how homophobia is so alive and breathing.
According to the material I read from the ” title=”The Campaign to End Homophobia” target=”_blank”>The Campaign to End Homophobia website, I learned that there are four distinct but interrelated types of homophobia: personal, interpersonal, institutional, and cultural. The form of homophobia that struck me the most was internalized homophobia, which is experienced when lesbian, gay, and bisexual people have strong feelings of fear, discomfort, dislike, hatred, or disgust with same-sex sexuality. I had felt that way for many years of my life. Internalized homophobia is very common within the LGBT community.
I read in a study about some of the affects, behaviors, cognition and defensive functioning associated with internalized homophobia. Some of the affects were: chronic anxiety, self-loathing, depression and distrust. Some of the behaviors were: Alcoholism, substance abuse, suicide and difficulty or avoidance in intimate relationships. Some of the cognitions were: At fault for victimization, innately defective or inferior, low self-esteem, negative attitudes and beliefs.
As I break down the beliefs, I am breaking free of my internal prison.
During my philosophy class, I experienced a surreal moment where I just felt a great sense of clarity of the big picture. I had a smile on my face and felt great peace, which I carried with me outside as the class had ended. There was no doubt in my mind that in that moment I was experiencing pure joy. I felt an amazing sense of unconditional love for myself and everyone else in my life, including the people that I may struggle with. My heart and mind were open, and I was naturally taking deep breaths of air, almost without any effort. I felt free. As I continue to work on breaking down the parts of my belief system that are not based in truth, freedom will become a more integral part of my being. I imagine that this is what Nechama and Batya felt during their B’not Mitzvah.
What I hope for you to take away from reading this blog is an inspiration to want to question and breakdown the untrue beliefs you may have about yourself and the world around you.
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Got Jewish Kids That Love Bedtime Stories?
If you want to help those children learn Hebrew, then sign up today for Sifriyat Pijama , a new program delivering Hebrew children’s stories to Israeli-American and other Jewish-American families to read at bedtime.
Just today I was speaking with yet another couple about Hebrew, or rather, the lack of Hebrew, in their lives. They feel alienated from furthering participation in Jewish religious life because they don’t know Hebrew, and feel unable to pass on their love of Judaism — or Hebrew – to their kids.
For centuries we have worked very hard to pass on Hebrew from generation to generation. And Hebrew has persisted against all odds because it binds together the people who have defied all the odds.
Today Hebrew is THE international Jewish language. The largest single Jewish society in the world, Israel, uses Hebrew. More Jewish books are published each year in Hebrew than in any other language. More Jewish music is released in Hebrew. Most Jewish newspapers in the world are written in Hebrew. More movies with Jewish themes are released in Hebrew. Nuf said, you get the picture.
In my upcoming book, Teach Your Children Well: 50 Reasons To Send Your Child To Jewish Day School, I focus on the importance of teaching your kids Hebrew from a young age. One of the reasons is because Hebrew is the key to understanding who we are, what we believe in, and where we are going.
Thanks to Sifriyat Pijama , the Israeli counterpart of the American PJ Library which has been distributing Jewish values-based books to kids and parents, thousands of Jewish families and kids will have a better chance to grasp Hebrew. If the popularity of PJ Library is any yardstick, this program will be very popular. Jewish parents want to educate their children Jewishly more than any time in the last two generations. PJ Library is so successful that it has franchised across the country, with approximately 170,000 subscribers.
Adam & Gila Milstein, creative and passionate philanthropists who are major sponsors of our Jewlicious Festival, saw the success of PJ Library, and saw a great opportunity to spread the concept to Hebrew. They have launched Sifriyat Pijama from Los Angeles, home to the largest Israeli ex-pat community in the America, together with the Israeli Leadership Council, and the Harold Grinspoon Foundation.
Until today most of these Hebrew bedtime story books were only available in Israel. Thanks to Pijama, they will be distributing Hebrew bedtime stories for free starting this school year to 1,000 families.
The reason they are handing out free books? To strengthen Jewish identity in children.
“We believe that by learning about Jewish values from a young age, and hearing stories in Hebrew,” said Adam Milstein said, “Jewish children are more likely to share a strong appreciation and affinity for their shared Jewish culture and language.”
How do you qualify? If you have children ages 3-5 year old kids in the United States that wish to read books in Hebrew to their young kids before bed time — you qualify.
” title=”Jewlicious Festival” target=”_blank”>Jewlicious Festival, and executive rabbi at ” title=”@RabbiYonah” target=”_blank”> @RabbiYonah
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At least 15 reported killed in Syria, among them 3 youths
At least 15 people were reported killed in Syria on Friday in protests against President Bashar Assad’s regime, Al Arabiya said.
Earlier, residents told Reuters that security forces shot dead three protesters in the central Syrian city of Homs, and at least three youths in the main district of Barzeh in Damascus when they fired at a protest demanding the Assad’s overthrow. Other deaths were reported in towns near the capital.
“The ‘amn’ (security police) first used teargas then they started shooting from rooftops when shoutings against Assad continued. Three youths were killed and I saw two bodies shot in the head and the chest,” a resident of Barzeh who gave his name as Hussam said by phone.
Read more at JPost.com.
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Korach: The Spiritual Narcissist
This week’s Torah reading deals with the rebellion of Korach, a cousin of Moses, who contends that he is just as deserving of leadership as the great lawgiver. Korach claims that Moses has usurped power for reasons of self-aggrandizement. Moses, whom the Bible declares to be the most humble man on the earth, acts out of character, becoming visibly angry, and says to G-d, ““Do not accept their offering. I have not taken a donkey from a single one of them, and I have not harmed a single one of them.” Moses is declaring that he never acted out of reasons of ego. That which he did, in setting up the Jewish leadership structure, was at G-d’s command. Ultimately, things do not fare well for Korach and his cohort. They are swallowed by the earth, never to be heard from again.
Korach is like a lot of people who practice religion. He wishes to be close to G-d, he wishes to be elevated above the rest of the people. But his motivation is for G-d to do something for him. He wants religion to fill the emptiness of his life, he wants it to help him grow. Korach loves G-d and wants to draw close to him. He is upset that Moses is closer. But whereas Moses serves G-d by His command, Korach’s desire is to fill an inner emptiness and void. Lacking meaning and purpose in life, he turns to G-d to fill in the space.
Real religious is God-centric. God is supposed to be at the apex of our lives, their every action revolving around His will. I reject utterly this superficial notion that religions is designed to help us grow. We are not plants. If you want to grow eat your Wheaties. To the contrary, religion and G-d’s will are to be obeyed even if it at times bores you. You don’t get married to grow as a person. Doing so would entering into a relationship to use your spouse for your own spiritual objectives. You get married because you have love to offer and you want to make someone happy.
But Korach represents the man or woman who comes to Church or Synagogue seeking the opposite. They want God to cater to their needs. They want the Synagogue service to give them the same good vibes as a Bruce Springsteen concert. Theirs is a man-centered religion. Religion is supposed to move them, enlighten them, and make them grow. Religion exists to refine their characters. They draw closer to G-d for their own purposes, however noble.
I often tell my Christian friends that they can learn much from Judaism about the correct way to understand Christ. The classic Christian understanding of the death of Christ is that Jesus lays down his life for humans in order to atone for their sin. This reflects the thought conveyed above. G-d exists for the benefit of the people. He dies so that the people can be saved and it’s all about them. But the quintessential symbol of Judaism is precisely the opposite. Abraham is prepared to sacrifice his son Isaac at G-d’s command. Humans exist to perform the divine will, whatever the consequences. We are here for G-d, not the reverse. So too, Jesus is martyred by the Romans for his desire to live as a Jew in a land that was being brutalized by Roman tyranny. He died serving his G-d.
Korach is the archetype of all those who go to Synagogue in order to find spiritual uplift, who go to Church to feel inspired, who practice Buddhism to find enlightenment. And should any of these religions fail to deliver, they become lapsed because the religion’s purpose, from their perspective, is self-edification.
This is a selfish mindset that simply extends human narcissism into the spiritual realm. It is this obsession with self which has wrought so much havoc on the modern world. In essence it is the mindset of the consumer. Everything exists for his benefit. Like Pacman, he devours everything in his midst, including G-d himself. It is the mind of utilitarian who sees personal utility in all that he encounters
Hence, the punishment for Korach and his followers is unlike any found anywhere else in the Bible. He is swallowed by the earth, never to be heard from again. His end reflects his very essence. In his life he was a black hole, sucking the oxygen out of all that he encountered. His death reflected this same insatiability. An earth that he had plundered for his own purposes gulped him down in one swish, never to be heard from again.
Rabbi Shmuley Boteach is founder of This World: The Values Network. His upcoming books “Ten Conversations You Need to Have with Yourself. (Wiley). Follow him on Twitter @RabbiShmuley.
Written by Rabbi Shmuley in memory of Machla bat Bina & Pinchas Dabakarov
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Are We There Yet…? Rabbi Barry Gelman
Are We There Yet…?- Rabbi Barry Gelman
June 24, 2011
Are We There Yet….?
Is our Judaism something that causes us to aspire to certain goals or does it cause stagnation and the belief that one has arrived at their final destination.
Yehsayahu Leibowitz points out that it is not a coincidence that the word “holy” appears at the end of last week’s Torah reading, Parshat Sh’lach and at the beginning of this week’s Torah reading, Parshat Korach. For him, the two uses of the word is meant to focus us in on the different ways it is used.
At the end of Parshat Sh’lach, the Torah states: “So that you remember and perform all My commandments, and become holy to your God.” Leibowitz stresses that this verse represents an aspirational approach to holiness in that the purpose of the Mitzvot is to help a person achieve holiness.
Korach, on the other hand hands declares: “…the entire assembly – all of them – are holy.” What Korach is saying is that holiness is a given and exists simply by virtue of the fact that one is a Jew.
On one level, Korach’s claim of innate holiness is empowering as it bespeaks a special status and perhaps a desire to live up to that rank.
Leibowitz, on the other hand, warns that such an approach cheapens holiness, as it need not be earned. It also leads to laziness and conceit as one may then claim that there is no work to be done on character and /or relationship development.
Living life as if one has already reached the pinnacle is the Korach way, as opposed to God’s decree to live life in constant aspiration of doing more and being better.
This idea is especially true in the area of personal character traits. Alan Morinis is his book, Climbing Jacobs Ladder, teaches the following about the goal of mussar practices. “ It assures us that we are not condemned to live forever with every aspect of the personality we happen to have right know, but that we can make changes that will set free the radiance of our inner light.”
The idea of aspiring for more is an important way to view the development of Halacha. For example, Eliezer Berkowitz in his book, Jewish Women in Time and Torah, distinguishes between stances that the Torah tolerates and those that the Torah aspires to. More recently, this approach has been adopted and expanded by Rabbi Nachum Rabinovitch.
Their claim is that some of the laws within the Torah itself are not the “end of the road” since they represent positions that are tolerated by the Torah due to historic realities while rabbinic legislation helps Halacha get closer to the ideal position. For details of Rabbi Rabinovitch’s application of this idea go to – http://tinyurl.com/5vngcg
God had to show that Korach’s approach was doomed to moral, ethical and even legal failure. It was an approach that could have only left the Jewish people, and anyone who accepts such an approach, stuck and stalled in their present condition. Perhaps the punishment of being swallowed up by the earth was God’s way of showing that Korach’s approach was the equivalent of getting stuck in the sand, with an inability to move forward and aspire to even greater heights.
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