Rabbis of LA | Rabbi Alexander’s Return to Adat Ari El

Contrary to a popular belief, sometimes you can go home again. Rabbi Leslie Alexander found this out when she returned to Adat Ari El 26 years after she left the Valley Village congregation. 

For the rabbi, it was a true homecoming. When she started at Adat Ari El in 1986, “thanks to the openness of Adat Ari El,” she became the first woman rabbi to be hired by a major Conservative synagogue. “Adat Ari El was very welcoming,” she said. “My husband made scrapbooks of the stories about my appointment from newspapers all over the world. I owe a lot to Adat Ari El, a lot.”

But a decade after joining Adat Ari El, Rabbi Alexander’s husband, Ken, a chemist, was offered the job of a lifetime in Silicon Valley.  “Now,” the rabbi said, “it was his turn to do something he really wanted to do.”

“When I needed to tell the board I was leaving Adat Ari El, I cried my eyes out at that meeting. I loved being here so much.”

While both the rabbi and her husband were natives of Northern California, it was hard for her to leave Los Angeles. “I was not happy when I had to move back to Northern California. I fell in love with Los Angeles. But it was his turn.” That didn’t make the move any easier. “When I needed to tell the board I was leaving Adat Ari El,” Alexander said, “I cried my eyes out at that meeting. I loved being here so much.” 

There were some positive aspects to the move: “When we moved back up north, my parents lived about an hour from us,” Alexander said. “My two daughters got to know their grandparents and see them all the time.” But there was a yearning for the rabbi’s adopted home. Was it difficult to return to Southern California?  “No-o-o-o-o-o,” the rabbi answered with a laugh. “I have always loved L.A. This was my thought process: I really loved being Jewish, and I wanted to live where there was a significant Jewish population. When I went to college at Berkeley, I really wanted to transfer to UCLA.”

Returning to Adat Ari El was not part of the rabbi’s plan when she returned to Los Angeles. “We moved back here to be closer to our daughter Shira, our son-in-law Justin and our granddaughter Romi, who live in Pico-Robertson.” And after spending 17 years working with a Jewish Federation in Silicon Valley and several years as a rabbi at a Saratoga synagogue, she was ready to retire. 

Then, last July, Adat Ari El’s senior rabbi, Brian Schuldenfrei, gave her a call. “I hear you’re back in town … You want to come in and talk?” She thought it was going to be a social call, a chance to catch up and schmooze. But when they sat down to talk, Rabbi Schuldenfrei told her “we have talked to a few people in the last year about being an assistant rabbi … but none worked out.” He then asked, “How would you like to be an interim rabbi at Adat Ari El?”

Her first response was skeptical. “I want to take care of my granddaughter and pick her up from preschool two days a week,” she told the rabbi. That wouldn’t be a problem, he said; she could work part-time. “But what if I want to go on vacation?” she asked. “He told me we’d work it out.” And just like that, she was unretired. 

Becoming a rabbi was something Alexander was almost fated to do. The daughter of a Conservative rabbi, she decided she wanted to be a rabbi when she was 17. Her parents vigorously supported her choice. The Conservative movement at the time was more hesitant. Women were not yet accepted for ordination as rabbis by Conservative temples, so Alexander attended the Reform-affiliated Hebrew Union College in Los Angeles. 

Which isn’t to say it was easy. It was a tough time to be a deeply committed Jewish woman. She recalled a party before her ordination ceremony. Gag gifts were distributed; Alexander’s was a raw chicken wing and a small plastic chicken for holding up the right-wing of the Reform movement. “This was because I kept kosher, I wouldn’t turn on lights on Shabbat, I wouldn’t spend money or tear toilet paper.” 

Was she ever upset that the Conservative movement didn’t begin to ordain women rabbis until 1985?  No, because I believe in Halacha,” she said. “I am glad the Conservative movement came to the conclusion of approving women rabbis based on Halacha. That’s the way things go if you are serious about Jewish life.”

Fast Takes with Rabbi Leslie Alexander

Jewish Journal: What is your favorite Jewish food?

Rabbi Alexander: A pastrami sandwich at the 2nd Avenue Deli in New York. Also, maybe, matzah balls.

JJ: What do you do on your days off?

Rabbi Alexander: I have a lot of hobbies. I pick up my granddaughter from Beth Am’s preschool every Monday and Thursday, take her for ice cream and play with her until my daughter is done with work.

JJ: What superpower would you like to have?

Rabbi Alexander: The power to make people listen to one another and understand the value of others.