Day 188: How Could This Pesach Be Celebrated with Joy?

One of my favorite questions that Oprah asked her guests is “What do you know for sure?” Here is what I know for sure about the human spirit, encapsulated in the wisdom of our ancestors in the Haggadah and the lived experiences of our chayalim. It’s a story of how challenge and struggle not only shape us but imbue us with wisdom that transcends our years.

Consider the timeless story from our Haggadah, a narrative that unfolds in Bnei Brak. Here, revered sages — Rabbi Eliezer, Rabbi Yehoshua, Rabbi Elazar Ben Azariah , Rabbi Akiva, and Rabbi Tarfon — engage in an all-night discussion on the Exodus from Egypt. This discussion, intense and spirited, continues until dawn, when their students remind them of the morning Shema. This moment, simple in its occurrence, is layered with profound significance.

Central to this narrative is Rabbi Elazar Ben Azariah , a figure of extraordinary intellect and spiritual depth, who remarks, “Behold, I am like a man of 70 years, yet I never grasped the significance of recounting the Exodus at night.” “Keshivim shana”—Notice how Rabbi Elazar says, “I am LIKE a man of 70 years.” This statement invites us into a remarkable backstory. Rav Elazar ben Azaria was actually an 18-year-old Talmudic genius who had been chosen to become the Nasi of the Sanhedrin, the Jewish Supreme Court. He possessed tremendous wisdom for his youth but lacked gravitas. So, he prayed to God, and his hair miraculously turned white overnight. This transformation allowed him to convey his insights with the authority of experience, despite his youth.

So, at the Seder, with the greatest sages of the generation, he humbly says, “I’m only like a 70-year-old man, and I never understood until now, why the Exodus from Egypt should be celebrated at night?” What changed?

Born into affluence and unfamiliar with hardship, Rabbi Elazar ben Azariah initially struggled to comprehend the full depth of the Exodus narrative. It was not until he encountered the dire conditions of his people, living under Roman oppression in the ashes of the second temple’s destruction, that he truly understood the importance of commemorating the Exodus, even during the darkest times. “I called to Hashem from Metzer, Mitzrayim, the narrowness, the constraints of oppression, and Hashem answered me with expansiveness.” Through difficulty, we can expand.

How could Pesach be celebrated with joy at such a time? In the ashes of the temple’s destruction, Rabbi Elazar Ben Azariah  found himself; he aged, growing a “white beard of experience and wisdom,” and through this confined narrow space, he also discovered hope. This transformation and his newfound understanding of the Exodus narrative illustrate how adversity shapes us, teaching lessons of leadership and insight that no number of years could alone provide.

This sentiment is echoed in the lives of our young chayalim. A mother poignantly said to me, “We knew we were sending our children to the army, but we didn’t know we were sending them to war.” Yet, it is in these very crucibles of conflict that our young chayalim have been forced to mature rapidly, confronting realities that most of us can scarcely imagine. One young soldier in his early 20s remarked at a simcha, “Yehoshua, from here I am going to a shiva for a friend, and after that, I am going to the hospital to visit a friend who is seriously injured. I came to this event to feel joy. Every single day is a gift, and we must seize joy when we can.” The “white beard” story and the experiences of our young chayalim serve as powerful lessons for how adversity shapes and changes us, preparing us for leadership and imbuing us with wisdom that defies our years

Rabbi Elazar Ben Azariah finds meaning and hope in the interpretation that the Liberation from Egypt should be celebrated even during the darkest nights of exile and suffering. He was 18.

We are living through some of the darkest nights, and those nights are true obstacles but also opportunities to gain wisdom beyond our years. 

We are living through some of the darkest nights, and those nights are true obstacles but also opportunities to gain wisdom beyond our years. Yes — wisdom we wished we could acquire in other ways.  We stand on the shoulders of giants, and they are our chayalim, the future leaders who, through their trials and tribulations, have grown white beards of wisdom overnight and who are lighting up a path, leading us through the darkness toward liberation –  with the torch of resilience, and hope — for all of us to follow.