Our Sundance reporter extraordinaire, Larry Mark, got the idea to tweet Jon M. Chu, the director of the much-anticipated documentary “Justin Bieber: Never Say Never,” to ask a question inquiring Jewish minds want to know. Here is what Larry just emailed me:
“This afternoon, the 5-year-old daughter of a co-worker informed her Mom that she needed a note for her Kindergarten teacher. The girl said she can’t go to school next Friday, since she heard on TV that is the day the ‘Justin Bieber: Never Say Never’ film opens. Her non-Tiger Mother explained to her that she can still see the film after school—and the girl was relieved.
This exchange got me wondering about the film, and asking myself what Jewish themes are in it. I know that Scott Samuel ‘Scooter’ Braun, the young man who discovered and nurtures Justin Bieber, and serves as his manager and ‘brother’ is Jewish, and that because of Scooter, Justin reportedly says the ‘Shema,’ along with another prayer, prior to his concert performances. Intrigued and curious, and obviously unable to reach Justin or Scooter, I reached out to the film’s director Jon M. Chu. I have followed Chu on twitter for quite some time, due to my enjoyment of his past choreography with theLXD.com.
Before lunch, I tweeted Jon, ‘Jon, HappyNewYr of Rabbit + Bieber. .. Can u tell if me if the film has Bieber reciting a Hebrew prayer b4 his concert?’
I am writing this letter because I just spent 30 minutes on the phone speaking with one of your Imbeciles, please excuse the spelling of that word, the auto-corrector doesn’t have a suggestion for me.
Anyway, I just wasted 30 minutes of my life and would like for you to re-pay me with the $5 that you originally stole from me, plus interest in the amount of 200.55%. The value of 30-minutes of my life comes to a total of $50.13. The $5 was under the “checking fee”, which I was trying to get back when I phoned you. Let me remind you dear Wescom employees that when a person signs up for a “FREE” account, it means you will never go into their account and take money that does not belong to you!
I understand that over the last 15 years or so, Wescom has become a much bigger bank than it originally used to be. And of course, the bigger you are, the more crap you can get away with. I also know that you will not be crying if I take my hard-earned money out of your bank. I am not sure what my point is here, kind of lost my train of thought… I can see how that doesn’t make my case very strong in my direction. Oh, yes I remember, you are all a bunch of scumbags. Look, the auto-corrector didn’t even bother putting the red wavy line across that word. I think it agrees with me. Yeah!
What I am trying to say here is that I will be closing my account, and taking my money across the street to “Joe Shmoes” Bank, but NOT before I get my $5 back!
So, here are some suggestions about how you can give back my $5 and 30-minutes of my life back from sitting on hold with you idiots.
1. You can send that Imbecile that I talked to on the phone to baby-sit my children while I go get a manicure. You have my address, right? I have a very fancy party to go to this weekend, but haven’t had time to get myself pampered.
2. If he doesn’t particularly like children, which I am guessing he might not, he could instead clean the bathrooms. I haven’t gotten to that today, been a very busy day.
3. If you have already taken my suggestion and fired the Imbecile, you can send someone else. I don’t mind at all.
4. You can also send me any office supplies that are sitting on your desk right now, worth $5. I really don’t mind if they are used either.
5. You could send me a gift card for a Spa day for a total of 30 minutes. I know that it would be crazy for me to think that a Spa day would return 30 minutes of my life, but it would be so relaxing, in turn making me forget how pissed off I am about my $5.
6. If none of these sound appealing to you, there is always the option of just putting $50.13 into my account.
The choice is yours, and I will be fine with whichever one you decide to go with. If you would like to read more on my suggestions, feel free to visit my website at: www.easternblocklox.wordpress.com
Fox News reported on Saturday that recently appointed Egyptian Vice President Omar Suleiman has survived an attempted assassination.
According to the report, armed assassins targeted the convoy in which Suleiman was travelling, killing two of his bodyguards.
Fox News reported that the U.S. confirmed the reports of the failed assassination attempt, however White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs declined to address the reports.
—You’ll probably develop carpel tunnel syndrome from spending over an hour a day on Google trying to figure out if those niggling pains in your pelvic area that you’ve been feeling for a few days are period cramps, or possibly (oh please God!) pregnancy symptoms… Then you’ll google “carpel tunnel” and “pregnancy” to see if there’s a correlation. . —Even if you’re TTC, chances are, you’ll be smoking a cigarette or drinking a glass of wine
or shooting smack
a day or two before you find out you’re pregnant.
—You’ll be secretly thrilled to have an excuse not to suck in your tummy. Or wear Spanx. But until you start looking pregnant, you’ll just look a little bloated. And this will piss you off.
—You may bleed. I did. In both pregnancies. And it was a nightmare. Both times.
—Transvaginal ultrasounds are bionic dildos sheathed in condoms and squirted with a lot of lube. It’s like a sci-fi porno starring your Lady Business… and your bladder if you forgot to pee before your doctor shoved that thing inside you.
—There’s an unspoken rivalry between women who puke and
bitches
women who don’t.
—Unless you’re upfront about being knocked up, people will assume you had a boob job.
—Panty-liners will become your best friend. And if your partner goes out to buy them for you and doesn’t judge, then he or she is badass.
—Hormones are no joke, and should be a valid defense if you cut the bitch who took your parking space in front of Krispy Kreme.
(Wadup, Judge Feldman.)
—You will hold your breath until you cross the First Trimester finish line.
THE SECOND TRIMESTER:
— You’ll spend at least 20 minutes a day looking at your profile in any full-length reflective surface you can find. You will celebrate when your belly”pops.” But really, you still just look bloated.
—The hormone defense should still hold water when your partner brings the wrong kind of ice cream home from the supermarket. And you cut him or her.
—You will have crazy-intense dreams. And not flying-with-unicorns-over-rainbows-in-outerspace-dreams. Unless you’re into that sort of thing. In other words, you know how 14 year old boys have to change their sheets every morning? Well, you will too. And you’ll love it.
—The first time you think you feel your baby move, it’s probably just gas. Sorry.
—At the 20 week ultrasound, all babies look like Voldemort. Even yours.
—There comes a time in (almost) every pregnant woman’s life when she fantasizes about her OBGYN or midwife.
The Orange County district attorney’s office on Friday charged 11 defendants with conspiring to disrupt a meeting and a speech by the Israeli ambassador to the United States at UC Irvine last year.
The move comes after about 50 protesters rallied in front of the Orange County district attorney’s office Tuesday. Though some have criticized the students’ method of protest, many said that university punishment was sufficient enough for the “Irvine 11,” as the students came to be known.
In a statement, Orange County Dist. Atty.Tony Rackauckas said the case was filed because of an “organized attempted to squelch the speaker.” He also said the students “meant to stop this speech and stop anyone else from hearing his ideas, and they did so by disrupting a lawful meeting.”
The top leadership body of Egypt’s ruling party resigned Saturday, including the president’s son, but the regime appeared to be digging in its heels, calculating that it can ride out street demonstrations and keep President Hosni Mubarak in office.
The ruling party leaders who resigned included the country’s most powerful political figures – and its most unpopular among many Egyptians. The move may have been aimed at convincing protesters in the streets that the regime is sincere in implementing democratic reforms they demand.
Earlier on Saturday, February Al Arabiya television retracted its report that President Hosni Mubarak had resigned as head of Egypt’s ruling party.
Supporters of the protests in Egypt rallied in Los Angeles on Saturday and Saturday, February 5 and 6, for the second consecutive weekend.
[UPDATE] Approximately 75 Egyptians, Egyptian Americans and activists, including representatives of the Society of Egyptian Americans, demonstrated outside the Egyptian consulate’s local office, calling for the resignation of Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak. The Egyptian consulate’s office is located at Wilshire Boulevard and Highland Avenue.
Watch the video below from the demonstration on Sunday, February 6.
[UPDATE] Among the demonstrators at a rally on Sunday was Sayed Badreya, an Egyptian actor who has starred in Hollywood films “Iron Man, “You Don’t Mess With the Zohan” and “Three Kings.”
“We’re not about [the] Muslim Brotherhood. We’re not about leftist or right. We’re about Egypt,” Badreya said.
Fouad Gohan, a 25-year-old who lives in Los Angeles and grew up in Egypt, attended the demonstration on Sunday. He vocalized his opposition to Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak, but said that he has cousins in Cairo who support Mubarak, at least more than he does. His cousins, he said, have watched Egyptian state television, which has made them believe that Mubarak is best for Egypt and that the protests in Egypt are harmful to the country, politically and economically. They are afraid to participate in the protests, Gohan said.
Linda Krausen stood across the street and held up large handcuffs made out of Styrofoam and tin foil and signs that called for the arrest of Mubarak. Krausen said that she used the same handcuffs in a previous demonstration against Karl Rove, who was senior advisor to George W. Bush, when Rove came to Los Angeles for a speaking event.
Krausen, who lives in South Pasadena and works as a Spanish interpreter for a government agency and attends Rosh Hashanah services at Nashuva, a synagogue in Los Angeles, said that the young protestors in Egypt view religion the way she does: “I’m a Jew, and I have my religion, [but] I just want justice,” she said.
[UPDATE] Watch interviews below from the demonstration on Sunday, February 6.
On Saturday, February 5, hundreds of demonstrators, including Egyptians, Egyptian Americans and representatives of L.A.-based activist organizations, gathered outside the Federal Building in Westwood and denounced the United States alliance with President Hosni Mubarak’s regime and called for Mubarak to resign from power.
Video from the demonstration on Saturday, February 5:
Egyptians have been protesting in Cairo, Alexandria and other cities for the past 12 days, while the Obama administration has tried to facilitate a transition of power in Egypt that would have the country’s current vice president Omar Suleiman negotiating with the anti-Mubarak groups.
Tamer Ali, an organizer of the Los Angeles rally, estimated that 500 people attended on Saturday. Much of the organizing beforehand was done on Facebook, with AnswerLA, SocialistWorker and the Party for Socialism and Liberation endorsing the demonstration. People representing the AnswerLA coaliation, SocialistWorker and Party for Socialiam and Liberation turned out for the rally.
The demonstration began at 11:30 a.m., and many carried signs that said, “End U.S. Aid to Mubark Regime” and “Stand With the Egyptian People,” waved Egyptians flags and stood on the sidewalk facing Wilshire Boulevard, cheering whenever cars driving by honked.
Blase Bonpane, KPFK radio host and activist, addressed the crowd on Saturday and called for the need of a greater distinction between peaceful demonstrators in Egypt and others who are inciting violence.
Watch the video below of Bonpane speaking to the demonstrators on Saturday, February 5.
Mohamad Kolkela, one of the rally organizers, said that he wouldn’t oppose Suleiman leading negotiations in Egypt if there is a guarantee that he won’t run for president.
Los Angeles Police Department officials were at the scene on Saturday, but Ali and LAPD officers worked together on keeping the demonstration calm. Demonstrations last weekend also took place at the Federal Building and outside the Egyptian consulate’s local office.
