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August 4, 2005

Etta Israel Campers Learn Skills for Life

Julie Gruenbaum Fax August 4, 2005

Mark Worland — six-foot-something, dressed in tight black and skinhead bald — grabs Navid by the arm.

\”Come with me!\” he barks.

\”No!\” screams Navid, barely 5-feet tall.

Navid throws himself on his back, locks the bottom of his feet to Worland\’s knees, and shields his face and head from Worland\’s flailing fists.

\”Great job,\” says Worland, a self-defense specialist, shaking Navid\’s hand and helping him up, as Navid\’s friends applaud.

This self-defense class is part of a repertoire of life skills that Navid and his peers are learning at Independent Living Skills, a summer program for developmentally disabled adults run by Etta Israel Center, a mid-Wilshire nonprofit for people with special needs.

Battling Board Backs Bond

Howard Blume August 4, 2005

What a difference a day makes.

In 24 little hours, the L.A. school board journeyed last week from chaos to harmony; from nothing to a November ballot measure; from no new taxes to a bond measure that will ask voters to raise their property taxes for schools \”one last time.\”

If voters go for it, these local school bonds would be the fourth in the Los Angeles Unified School District (LAUSD) since 1997, and would raise $3.985 billion to pay for new and repaired schools. Part of the money is needed to make up for the feverishly rising cost of school construction; the rest would fund a program that has expanded to some $15.2 billion, perhaps the nation\’s largest ongoing public works project outside of Iraq.

Right the Wrongs

Rabbi Lisa Edwards August 4, 2005

Last January, I breathed a sigh of relief. The new domestic partnership law went into effect in the state of California, giving senior citizen and same-gender couples a range of state rights nearly equal to the rights given married couples in California.

In so doing, California became second only to Massachusetts in seeking to extend the civil rights of its residents, and many members of the Los Angeles Jewish community, myself included, knew we finally had the legal protections in place that are so critically important to the security of our families.

Center Court

Rob Eshman August 4, 2005

At the Mercedes-Benz Cup doubles final last Sunday at UCLA, the clumps of Israelis in the grandstands waved their blue-and-white flags between points and yelled out encouragement in Hebrew. They were cheering on the team of Yoni Erlich and Andy Ram, who had reached the finals by defeating the top-seeded team in the world, Americans Bob and Mike Bryan.\n\nAt one point a woman began chanting, \”Yisrael! Yisrael!\” and a few others joined in, but mostly people just clapped and smiled, thrilled that their country could put such a team on center court.

Child’s Play

Teresa Strasser August 4, 2005

Is our culture trying to scam us into having kids?

This is an epic question and I only have 850 words, so let me start close to home, with my grandma.

\”Listen to me,\” she said last week over the phone from Reseda. \”You have to have kids. You\’ll never regret it. It\’s the best thing you\’ll ever do. Listen to your grandma.\”

Catch any celebrity parent on a talk show and you\’re likely to hear the same sentiment about the singularly life-changing effects of parenthood. When Jude Law, Eminem, Denise Richards and Esther Strasser agree on something, you have to give it consideration.

Schwarzenegger Is Losing Jewish Vote

Raphael J. Sonenshein August 4, 2005

In November 2003, California voters recalled Gov. Gray Davis and replaced him with Arnold Schwarzenegger. White voters backed the recall by a large margin, but Jewish voters swam against the tide, with 69 percent voting against the recall. On the second part of the ballot, where voters chose a replacement candidate, Schwarzenegger collected a surprising 31 percent of Jewish voters.

I suggested then in these pages that Schwarzenegger might eventually do well with Jews: \”Jewish voters aren\’t likely to abandon the Democratic Party anytime soon, but will likely give Arnold Schwarzenegger a chance to prove that he can govern in a bipartisan, moderate manner…. If Schwarzenegger truly seeks to solve the state\’s problems without being a tool of right-wing forces, and with an open-minded, progressive approach, he may find a surprising number of friends among California\’s Democratic-leaning Jewish voters.\”

Chance given, chance blown.

My Work Is Not to Blame for Jew-Haters

Bernard Goldberg August 4, 2005

Usually I only respond to fair and thoughtful criticism, but I\’ll make an exception in this case, because people I respect tell me that Rob Eshman, the editor-in-chief of this publication, is both a smart and decent guy.

Recently, he wrote a column on July 29 about my new book — \”100 People Who Are Screwing Up America (and Al Franken is \’37),\” and this is how the column began: \”Jewish Americans are only 2 percent of the nation\’s population, but they are 25 percent of its problem.\”

Of course, he doesn\’t believe that. The point was that I supposedly believe that. Why? It seems that Eshman actually counted up all the Jewish people on the list, came up with 25, and, well, you do the math.

Good thing my name is Goldberg and not something WASPy or the column might have begun, \”This is a book written by a Jew-hating bigot.\”

Not-So-Nice Jewish Boy

Jonathan Kesselman August 4, 2005

When Israeli producers came to America to audition Jewish men to star in \”Nice Jewish Boy,\” their upcoming Bachelor-type reality show, I decided to throw my hat in the ring. After all, who better than me — a commitment-phobic, ardently secular, anxious, heavily medicated, pale glass of short Jewish water — to represent the American way?

This could be a chance for me to make a real difference in Israeli-American relations. I began to fantasize about my very own harem of glistening Israeli chicks in sweaty army fatigues, and all that we could do to and for one another in the name of world diplomacy. I\’d learn invaluable lessons that only these gorgeous Israelis could teach me: how to shoot an Uzi, how to chain smoke and how to have zero respect for someone\’s personal space. I, on the other hand, would pass on such valuable American skills as: driving a block away to Starbucks to spend $3 on a cup of coffee, how to say the words \”excuse me\” and, most importantly, how to apply underarm deodorant.

So, after my initial inquiry and some e-mail exchanges with the producer, I received a phone call from the show\’s production coordinator in Israel at 6 a.m. No. You heard that right. Six. In the morning.

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