Sewing tools

“Chew” by Carren S. Oler (June 20, 2017)

[Ed. Note: There have accrued over the centuries some folk practices, local beliefs, superstitions, and customs around issues of dying and death in the Jewish world. This poem touches on just one of these that is fairly widespread among those with connections to certain parts of the world. Enjoy. — JB]


For Zayda’s visits from time to time

From a different city,

We children were excited

And wanted to wear our best

To look pretty.

Zayda was a tailor and never far

From needle, thread, and thimble

In the pocket of his ever-present vest

One inside the other, a carefully placed nest.


I rushed to hug him

And wasn’t so nimble

(I was eight) and snagged my sleeve

On the lamp table

Not able to stop my skip and hop.

I was shocked, sure my mother would be mad.

(It was the newest blouse I had!)


“Sh, Sh” Zayda gestured, “Come here.”

And as I came near, he said,


“Chew?” What could be stranger?

But I felt I was in real danger.

So I stood there and chewed.

And in no time my mood

Lifted as he sewed my sleeve

With perfect, even stitches.


And my mother never knew

Or so I thought then….


Sometime later (months? years?)

After my fears abated,

I asked my mother why,

When sewing my sleeve,

Zayda told me to “chew”…

She laughed and wasn’t shy

About the explanation she knew.


“Zayda belongs to the Chevrah Kadisha

And is one of the tailors who sews

Tachrichim (shrouds) on those who have died.

And he says we cannot hide

From the Angel of Death who hovers…

BUT, if he is sewing on one who chews,

It’s not news that such a person lives.

And the Angel of Death is chased away

And cannot stay.”


Years later, as I was starting to sew a button

Back on my then young son’s sleeve,

You can best believe

That the first thing I said to him was,


Carey Oler

Carren S. Oler

Carey Oler

Carren S. Oler, Esq.

Freelance Paralegal; Previously in private law practice with an emphasis on general litigation, family law, dispute resolution, mediation and collaborative law. Retired from legal practice following a breast cancer diagnosis, surgery and chemotherapy at Georgetown’s Lombardi Comprehensive Cancer Center.  Currently and gratefully in remission.

Shmira Coordinator: Jewish Funeral Practices Committee of Greater Washington, February 2017 to date; Program provided 246.5 Shomer hours in May 2017. Chevrah Kadisha member at two Maryland synagogues; occasional Taharah trainer.




The Gamliel Institute will be offering course 2, Chevrah Kadisha: Taharah & Shmirah, online, afternoons/evenings, in the Fall semester, starting September 5th, 2017. This is the core course focusing on Taharah and Shmirah, ritual, liturgy, practical matters, how-to, and what it means.


The course will meet online for twelve Tuesdays (the day will be adjusted in any weeks with Jewish holidays during this course).

There is a Free preview/overview of the course being offered on Monday August 14th at 5 pm PDST/8 pm EDST. You are welcome to join us to see if this course is one in which you would like to enroll. Contact or for information on how to connect to the preview webinar.

There will be an orientation session on how to use the platform and access the materials on Monday, September 4th, 2017, also at 5 pm PDST/8 pm EDST online. Register or contact us for more information.

Information on attending the online orientation and course will be sent to those registered.


You can register for any Gamliel Institute course online at A full description of all of the courses is found there.

For more information, visit the Gamliel Institute website, or at the Kavod v’Nichum website. Please contact us for information or assistance by email, or phone at 410-733-3700.



Donations are always needed and most welcome to support the work of Kavod v’Nichum and the Gamliel Institute, helping us to bring you the conference, offer community trainings, provide scholarships to students, refurbish and update course materials, expand our teaching, support programs such as Taste of Gamliel, the Gamliel Café, and the Gamliel Gracuates courses, provide and add to online resources, encourage and support communities in establishing, training, and improving their Chevrah Kadisha, and assist with many other programs and activities.

You can donate online at or by snail mail to: either Kavod v’Nichum, or to The Gamliel Institute, both c/o David Zinner, Executive Director, Kavod v’Nichum, 8112 Sea Water Path, Columbia, MD  21045. Kavod v’Nichum [and the Gamliel Institute] is a recognized and registered 501(c)(3) organization, and donations may be tax-deductible to the full extent provided by law. Call 410-733-3700 if you have any questions or want to know more about supporting Kavod v’Nichum or the Gamliel Institute.

You can also become a member (Individual or Group) of Kavod v’Nichum to help support our work. Click here (



If you would like to receive the periodic Kavod v’Nichum Newsletter by email, or be added to the Kavod v’Nichum Chevrah Kadisha & Jewish Cemetery email discussion list, please be in touch and let us know at

You can also be sent a regular email link to the Expired And Inspired blog by sending a message requesting to be added to the distribution list to

Be sure to check out the Kavod V’Nichum website at, and for information on the Gamliel Institute, courses planned, and student work in this field also visit the Gamliel.Institute website.


Sign up on our Facebook Group page: just search for and LIKE Chevra Kadisha sponsored by Kavod vNichum, or follow our Twitter feed @chevra_kadisha.



If you have an idea for an entry you would like to submit to this blog, please be in touch. Email We are always interested in original materials that would be of interest to our readers, relating to the broad topics surrounding the continuum of Jewish preparation, planning, rituals, rites, customs, practices, activities, and celebrations approaching the end of life, at the time of death, during the funeral, in the grief and mourning process, and in comforting those dying and those mourning, as well as the actions and work of those who address those needs, including those serving in Bikkur Cholim, Caring Committees, the Chevrah Kadisha, as Shomrim, funeral providers, in funeral homes and mortuaries, and operators and maintainers of cemeteries.






Why are Jews traditionally buried in a Tallis? By Isaac Pollak

[Ed. Note: The tallis, also pronounced tallit, is the name for the Jewish prayer shawl. Its purpose is to help remind the wearer of the commandments that are to be followed. It comes in two basic forms; the tallit gadol, often worn as an overgarment or wrap, and the tallit katan, usually worn as an undergarment, beneath the coat or shirt. The purpose of both is similar: they serve as the base on which the attachment of the fringes, the tzitzit or tzitzis – pl. tzitziot, is accomplished. These are the fringes mentioned in the Torah, Bamidbar/Numbers 15:37-41. The fringes are strings that are wound and tied to create knots and windings in specific patterns that are intended to represent the totality of the mitzvoth or commandments, and thereby serve as a visual reminder. — JB]

Why are Jews traditionally buried in a Tallis?

This question is touched on in two places in the Talmud. Our first indication that men are buried in a Tallis is from Talmud Bavli in Tractate Bava Batra 74:A which reads as follows:

Rabba bar Bar Chana related that an Arab merchant showed him the burial spot of the Israelites who had died during their 40 year trek in the desert. Rabba said he dug up one of the bodies and removed a corner of the fringed garment (Tzitzis) to take back home to determine the proper method of producing a Tallis and its fringes. However, he was divinely prevented from taking it with him.

Here is our first indication that one is buried in a Tallis. (See also Tractate Samechot, Chapter 10.)

Tosofos [also spelled Tosafot] (early Medieval commentaries on the Talmud) remark that this is not necessarily proof, because the Midrash says that the people in the desert (Midbar) knowing they were fated to die, would lie down in their graves annually (on the ninth of Av) wearing their Taleisim [Ashkenaz; plural of Tallis] and await their death. Tosofos concludes that this doesn’t necessarily prove that a deceased person should be wrapped in a Tallis before burial, as this annual event was a unique occurrence.

Tallis with Tzitzis

Tosofos, however, also infers from another Tractate, Talmud Bavli Menachos 41:A, that the dead should be buried in a Tallis with Tzitzis. This is the second source in the Talmud.

The relevant discussion in Tractate Menachos asks whether a four cornered garment needs fringes on its own even if it’s not worn; in other words, is the obligation on the wearer or is the obligation on the four cornered garment?

Rabbi Tove bar Kisna says in the name of Shmuel that fringes are obligatory on each four-cornered garment whether it’s worn or not, as long as the garment remains ready to be potentially worn; articles of clothing left in a drawer are still subject to the requirement of having fringes. The proof text is from Deuteronomy 12:12, “You shall make yourself braided fringes of the four corners of your garment with which you cover yourself.”

  אשר תכסה בה

The stipulation is that as long as it would be potentially possible to cover yourself with it, or it has the potential to be used as a garment, it needs fringes. A garment made for a living person to wear at some time in the future, whether used for that purpose or not, must have Tzitzis.

Garment Made NOT for the Living?

Shmuel, the Talmud continues, concedes, regarding an elderly person who made a four-cornered garment for his personal shroud, that it is exempt from Tzitzis. Even though the Tallis/Shroud may upon occasion be worn by a living person (to be fitted, for example), it’s still exempt because it’s made for a purpose other than being worn by a living person. It is not defined as a garment with which you cover yourself, rather it is by definition a shroud; it was produced with the intention of being worn by a deceased person.

Burial in a Tallis!

This is the basis that to this day Jewish men are buried in a Tallis!

Tzitzis on a Shroud?

Now the question arises whether the Tallis/Shroud needs Tzitzit?The Talmud continues that when a person dies we most certainly affix fringes to the four-cornered burial shroud because of the verse in Proverbs 17:5 “one who mocks a pauper insults his maker”.   לעג  לרש וחרף

The Talmud continues that when a person dies we most certainly affix fringes to the four-cornered burial shroud because of the verse in Proverbs 17:5 “one who mocks a pauper insults his maker”.   לעג  לרש וחרף


This is as if to say that clothing a deceased in a four cornered garment that has no Tzitzis appears to be a form of mockery of the deceased, because it draws attention to the fact that the deceased is no longer obligated to follow God’s commandments, and it seems to be mocking him by saying ‘we can continue to observe the commandments, but you, the deceased, can’t continue and are unable to follow God’s commandments’.

Why invalidate the Tzitzis?

Tosofos (in TB Bava Batra 74:A and TB Brachos 18:A) questions why there is a prevailing custom (in medieval Ashkenaz – France and Germany) to remove, cut off, or invalidate the fringes in some form?

Rabbeinu Tam (Rashi’s grandson) responds that wrapping a dead person in fringes not only signifies that he fulfilled the commandments of Tzitzis, but that he was faithful to all 613 positive commandments, because the numerical value of the word Tzitzis is 600 combined with the eight strands of the Tzitzit and the five knots that are attached to the Tallis, which added together equal six hundred and thirteen.

Adds the Ri (Tosofos) that in the days of the wise, all men in the community observed the commandment of Tzitzis and therefore they were buried with a Tallis and all its fringes, but in this current time (13th-15th century) many people are not scrupulous about wearing Tzitzis during their lifetime, and it was considered deceitful to wrap such people in Tzitzis only after their death; therefore one of the fringes is cut off.

In short – it’s a compromise. Everyone is buried in a Tallis, however, because many were not careful in the observance of the Mitzvoth in their lifetime, the Tallis remains in place, but in an invalid state. (See Talmud Bavli Nidah 61:B Tosofot Avel for a detailed treatment of the issue of removing or invalidating the Tallis by cutting off or removing one of the Tzitzit .)

Eventually, it became customary to bury ALL people in a Tallis with invalid Tzitzis in order not to openly distinguish between those who wore Tzitzis during their life time and those who did not.

This is codified in the Shulchan Aruch, Yoreah Deah, Siman 351:2 (see the long Ba’ch on the Yoreah Deah which offers a detailed explanation of the custom as it evolved) and is done so by the vast majority of Chevrei Kaddisha worldwide.

How do we invalidate the Tzitzis?

Various traditions have arisen, and the most popular involve:

  • Cutting off one of the 4 fringes (which seems to be the most popular) but leaving the removed Tzitzis in the casket.
  • Opening the sides of the Tallis pocket where the Tzitzis are attached and rolling the Tzitzis into the pocket thus temporarily invalidating the Tallis.
  • Making additional knots besides the five knots on the fringes, therefore invalidating the Tallis, but still easy to unknot and re-validate.
  • Hanging the Tzitzit outside the coffin so they are physically separate.
  • Making 2 fringes out of the four by knotting two and two together.
  • In some Chassidic communities it’s customary to lay the body in the ground wrapped in a Tallis, and once it’s in the ground to then remove the Tallis, or put a Tallis on the deceased, lay him in the coffin and put the coffin in the earth and then to remove coffin lid and remove the complete Tallis.
  • Some prominent Medieval and later Rabbis instructed their students to bury them with Tzitzis in their hands (and not invalidate them in any way) as if they were saying the prayers on Tzitzis.

Other Questions

Another dimension is raised, leading to some questions that are not fully resolved.

If a person had a weekday Tallis and a Shabbos (Sabbath) Tallis, which one should they be wrapped in for burial?

Here again there is a difference of opinion. Some say (Kitzur Shulchan Aruch) the Shabbos Tallis has a higher level of showing one’s faithfulness in keeping the commandments; whereas others claim that the one used more frequently – the weekday Tallis – has a higher level of holiness.

What of Women?

There is a tradition among some Sephardic communities and some of the Naturei Karta groups of Jerusalem that a woman is also buried with a Tallis Katan without Tzitzis (small Tallis; not full size). This may be based on Shulchan Aruch Orach Hayim, Siman 17, that a woman who wore a Tallis Katan in her lifetime should be buried in one, and the same principle as above; in order not to make a distinction between women who wore them and women who didn’t, these communities decided that all would be buried with a Tallis Katan, but without Tzitzis.

Are we causing a Potential Problem by removing the Tzitzis?

Another question arises whether there will be an obligation of Tzitzis (or any other commandments) when we achieve Techias Ha’Maisim (resurrection of the dead) after the arrival of the Messiah.

If there will be an obligation to follow the commandments, then all those who rise from the dead will have non-kosher Taleisim (with invalidated fringes). [What a business bonanza for Tallis manufacturers when we all arise from the dead!]

For a related concern, see TB Niddah 61:B and the Shulchan Aruch, Yoreah Deah 301:7 for a fascinating discussion of Shatnez – the forbidden combination of wool and linen – which is allowed in Shrouds, which to some degree is based on the issue here of whether there will be an obligation to fulfill Mitzvot after the Resurrection of the Dead – techiat hameitim.

On the other hand, if there is no obligation to observe Mitzvoth once one is deceased, and there will not be an obligation when we all arise from the dead, then why invalidate the Tallis?

The concept of Lo’ag Larash (mocking a disadvantaged person or ridiculing the helpless) is no longer valid as the deceased has no obligation to observe any commandments now or in the future. However, the concept of Lo’ag Larash may be that we are feeling sorry for them now that they no longer can, and no longer have any obligation to perform any Mitzvoth.

What about the Mitzvah Against Wasting/Destroying?

Removing the Tzitzis leads to another question, that of Ba’al Tashchis (a Torah prohibition against wasting, taking a perfectly good item that can be used for holy purposes or other purposes as well, and making it totally unusable –unfit for holy use or other uses). Invalidating the tzitzis seems to be a clear violation of this principle. How can we justify it?


No answers were found to resolve these additional questions. It seems we will need to await the Messiah’s coming for answers to these and others.

Isaac Pollak is the Rosh/Head of a Chevrah Kadisha on the upper East Side of Manhattan, NYC and has been doing Taharot for almost 4 decades. He is fascinated by and a student of customs and history concerning the Chevrah Kadisha and Jewish burial and mourning ritual. He is an avid collector of Chevrah Kadisha material cultural items, with over 300 historical artifacts in his own collection. He serves as chairperson of the Acquisition Committee for Traditional Material Culture at the Jewish Museum in NYC, and is CEO of an International Marketing Company. He is a student and participant in Gamliel Institute courses.

Isaac Pollak

Isaac Pollak

[Ed Note: Isaac Pollak has agreed to serve as a ‘researcher’ for the Expired and Inspired blog, providing us with information that is pertinent and interesting. If you have a question, please submit it to the editor. — JB]



Registration for the 15th North American Chevrah Kadisha and Jewish Cemetery Conference, next week on June 18-20, in San Rafael, California, is still open, and you can attend..

Our conference will have intensive workshops on Introduction to Taharah, Infection Control, Communicating about difficult Taharot, Modifying Taharah, Taharah Stories as well as exploring traditional Taharah liturgy, Navigating Taharah Liturgy – A Play, and Taharah liturgy in Maavar Yabbok.

We’ll have an exciting series of workshops on Jewish cemetery issues, including Green Cemeteries, Cremation, Perpetual Care Fund Investments, Record Keeping and Acquiring New Cemetery Property.

What’s different this year is an evolving theme – expanding the work of the Chevrah Kadisha and the Jewish Cemetery by encouraging conversation about end of life plans with the Conversation Project; end of life decision-making with Dr. Jessica Zitter, and communicating about how we die with Dr. Dawn Gross.

There’s much more – see our Preliminary conference program.

Consider a Sunday morning pre-conference field trip to Gan Yarok – an environmentally conscious Jewish Green Cemetery.

Sunday afternoon from 2-5, Sam Salkin, Executive Director of Sinai Memorial Chapel, will facilitate an intensive session on starting & managing a community funeral home. Let us know if you are interested in this session. Attendance is by advance reservation only.

Tuesday afternoon after the conference Sinai Memorial Chapel will facilitate a tour of Gan Shalom Cemetery, a Jewish cemetery with an interfaith section. Again, let us know if you are interested – Attendance by advance reservation only.

And there is an extension to the conference! Gamliel Institute students, and others by approval, can remain for an additional day to participate in the Gamliel Institute Day of Learning. We will have three extraordinary teachers presenting on a variety of texts and concepts that are of interest. This is a fantastic opportunity to study with some of the very best instructors in a small group setting during a twenty-four hour period. Students, contact us to RSVP; if you are not a Gamliel student, contact us to seek approval of the Dean to attend.

Register for the conference now.

We have negotiated a great hotel rate with Embassy Suites by Hilton, but rooms are limited; please don’t wait to make your reservations. We also have home hospitality options – contact us for information or to request home hospitality. 410-733-3700,

Questions? Email or call 410-733-3700.


In 2017, Kavod v’Nichum and the Gamliel Institute are again sponsoring a six-part “Taste of Gamliel” webinar series. This year’s topic is From Here to Eternity: Jewish Views on Sickness and Dying.

Each 90 minute session is presented by a different scholar.

The June 25th session is being taught by Dr. Laurie Zoloth, well known author, teacher, and scholar.  

Taste of Gamliel Webinars for this year are scheduled on January 22, February 19, March 19, April 23, May 21, and June 25. The instructors this year are: Dr. Dan Fendel, Rabbi Dayle Friedman, Rabbi Sara Paasche-Orlow, Rabbi Richard Address, Rabbi Elliot Dorff, and Dr. Laurie Zoloth.

This series of Webinar sessions is free, with a suggested minimum donation of $36 for all six sessions. These online sessions begin at 5 PM PDST (GMT-7); 8 PM EDST (GMT-4).

Those registered will be sent the information on how to connect to the sessions, and will also receive information on how to access the recordings of all six sessions.

The link to register is:

More info – Call us at 410-733-3700 or email    

Click the link to register and for more information. We’ll send you the directions to join the webinar no less than 12 hours before the session.




Gamliel Institute will be offering course 2, Chevrah Kadisha: Taharah & Shmirah, online, afternoons/evenings, in the Fall semester starting September 5th, 2017.


The course will meet on twelve Tuesdays (the day will be adjusted in those weeks with Jewish holidays during this course). There will be an orientation session on Monday, September 4th, 2017.  Register or contact us for more information.


You can register for any Gamliel Institute course online at A full description of all of the courses is found there.

For more information, visit the Gamliel Institute website, or at the Kavod v’Nichum website. Please contact us for information or assistance by email, or phone at 410-733-3700.



Donations are always needed and most welcome to support the work of Kavod v’Nichum and the Gamliel Institute, helping us to bring you the conference, offer community trainings, provide scholarships to students, refurbish and update course materials, expand our teaching, support programs such as Taste of Gamliel, provide and add to online resources, encourage and support communities in establishing, training, and improving their Chevrah Kadisha, and assist with many other programs and activities.

You can donate online at or by snail mail to: either Kavod v’Nichum, or to The Gamliel Institute, c/o David Zinner, Executive Director, Kavod v’Nichum, 8112 Sea Water Path, Columbia, MD  21045. Kavod v’Nichum [and the Gamliel Institute] is a recognized and registered 501(c)(3) organizations, and donations may be tax-deductible to the full extent provided by law. Call 410-733-3700 if you have any questions or want to know more about supporting Kavod v’Nichum or the Gamliel Institute.

You can also become a member (Individual or Group) of Kavod v’Nichum to help support our work. Click here (



If you would like to receive the periodic Kavod v’Nichum Newsletter by email, or be added to the Kavod v’Nichum Chevrah Kadisha & Jewish Cemetery email discussion list, please be in touch and let us know at

You can also be sent an email link to the Expired And Inspired blog each week by sending a message requesting to be added to the distribution list to

Be sure to check out the Kavod V’Nichum website at, and for information on the Gamliel Institute and student work in this field also visit the Gamliel.Institute website.


Sign up on our Facebook Group page: just search for and LIKE Chevra Kadisha sponsored by Kavod vNichum, or follow our Twitter feed @chevra_kadisha.



If you have an idea for an entry you would like to submit to this blog, please be in touch. Email We are always interested in original materials that would be of interest to our readers, relating to the broad topics surrounding the continuum of Jewish preparation, planning, rituals, rites, customs, practices, activities, and celebrations approaching the end of life, at the time of death, during the funeral, in the grief and mourning process, and in comforting those dying and those mourning, as well as the actions and work of those who address those needs, including those serving in Bikkur Cholim, Caring Committees, the Chevrah Kadisha, as Shomrim, funeral providers, in funeral homes and mortuaries, and operators and maintainers of cemeteries.


Expired And Inspired

Kavod v’Nichum’s Expired And Inspired: Who may Prepare Whom for Burial?

You may recall that some weeks back I described a new feature of the Expired and Inspired blog; the option to submit a question that would be researched and written up. This is the first response to such a question.

The Question Asked

The question for this blog came up in several ways. It has been a part of the ongoing discussion concerning who should/could be included in a Chevrah Kadisha team, and how a Chevrah Kadisha team might/should deal with encountering a transgender meit/ah. The answer to that issue is not yet fully clear, nor is there universal agreement.

It is fairly widely understood that the traditional practice has been that men could only prepare men for burial, while women could prepare either women or men (in an ‘emergency’). This practice has been used to choose to have teams of women as the Chevrah Kadisha in some instances, for example in times of war, when no men were available, or, more recently, for the preparation of some transgender persons.

The question that is being considered here is not about the transgender concern (I mention that only because that was the context in which the question came up), but simply, how did it come to be that women could serve on/as the Chevrah Kadisha team for men?

Credit where credit is due

I turned to our volunteer researcher, Isaac Pollak, a student of the Gamliel Institute, and a long time, very experienced member of several Chevrah Kadisha teams, who has also studied and participated on Chevrah Kadisha teams worldwide. Thanks and appreciation to him for his efforts on this question.

Please note: I am summarizing Isaac’s work; I have done my best, but it is quite possible that I have misunderstood or misstated something, so if there are any errors, I have introduced them – don’t blame Isaac, it is my fault. — JB


It turns out that there isn’t a great deal of information that supports the custom that women may perform a Taharah for men.

The earliest basic text found to start with is Chapter 12:10 of Evel Rabbati (first part of minor tractate Semachot), which reads:

“A man may shroud and gird the corpse of a man, but not that of a woman. A woman may shroud and gird the corpse of a man or of a woman.

A man may attend another man suffering from intestinal illness, but not a woman. A woman may attend a man or a woman suffering from intestinal illness.”

Other later textual sources such as the Tur (Jacob ben Asher, Arba’ah Turei), the Shulchan Aruch (Joseph Caro, Code of Jewish Law), Nachalat Yaakov (Yaakov ben Binyamin Aharon, on Rashi’s Commentary on the Torah), and the Taz (David Halevi Segal, Turei Zahav) build on this position, and all state that the reason that a man cannot shroud women is because a man has a tendency to have immediate prurient thoughts  upon the sight of a woman’s body, whereas a woman does not.

More, the subsequent responsa literature seems to all repeat the same thing, with no additional information.


The finding is that the early source, Evel Rabbati 12:10, continues to be the basis upon which this allowance of women to prepare men stands, and the only additions after this text are apparently assertions of the (we might think questionable) reason for the allowance.

We can speculate that this was at one time arrived at as a practical answer: I can imagine that in a time of war, when most men were away for extended periods for work or travel, when there were restrictions on the gathering of men in groups, or for other reasons; there may have been times when only women would have been available to perform the essential mitzvot around Taharah, whether the deceased was male or female.

That might have given rise to pressure to find a way for women to be permitted to do this task for men instead of men doing it. Women would have been engaged, even though this could be seen as fulfilling a time-bound mitzvah (one to be completed as soon as possible, and preferably within a day to permit speedy burial); a category of mitzvot for which women are generally not obligated, and some say prohibited, in halachic thought.

This is a fascinating question. We don’t have a complete answer, but the underlying ‘why’ is most intriguing.

If you know any more about this question, please feel free to be in touch or submit an article for the blog.

Do You Have a Question?

And if you have a question you would like us to look into, please send it to me at

Rabbi Joe Blair serves two small congregations in the central Shenandoah Valley of Virginia, is an adjunct faculty member in the Department of Philosophy and Religion at Bridgewater College, and serves as webmaster and coordinator for Jewish Values Online. He studied at, and was one of the first group of graduates from the Gamliel Institute. He serves as a staff and board member of Kavod v’Nichum, and as a faculty member and Dean of Administration for the Gamliel Institute. He is the editor of the Kavod v’Nichum’s blog, Expired and Inspired, which appears on the L.A. Jewish Journal blogs website. He is involved in several Chevrot Kadisha.

Rabbi Joe Blair

Rabbi Joe Blair



From Here to Eternity: Jewish Views on Sickness and Dying.

In 2017, Kavod v’Nichum and the Gamliel Institute are again sponsoring a six part “Taste of Gamliel” webinar. This year’s topic is From Here to Eternity: Jewish Views on Sickness and Dying.

Each 90 minute session is presented by a different scholar. Taste of Gamliel gives participants a “Taste” of the Gamliel Institute’s web-based series of courses. The Gamliel Institute is the leadership training arm of Kavod v’Nichum. The Gamliel Institute offers five on-line core courses, each 12 weeks in length, that deal with the various aspects of Jewish ritual around sickness, death, funerals, burial and mourning. Participants come from all over the United States, Canada, Central and South America, with a few Israelis and British students on occasion.

Upcoming Taste of Gamliel Webinars are on February 19, March 19, April 23, May 21, and June 25. Learn from the comfort of your own home or office.

The Taste sessions are done in a webinar format, where the teacher and students can see each other’s live video feeds. The sessions are moderated, ask participants to raise their virtual hands to ask questions, and call on and unmute participants when appropriate. We’ve been teaching using this model for seven years (more than 250 session). We use Zoom, a particularly friendly tool.

Webinar sessions are free, with a suggested minimum donation of $36 for all six sessions. Online sessions are 90 minutes. Sessions begin at 5 PM PST; 8 PM EST.

Those registered will be sent the information on how to connect to the sessions. Those registered will also reveive access to recordings of all six sessions.

The link to register is:

You will receive an automated acknowledgement of registration. Information and technology assistance is available after you register. Those who are registered are sent an email ahead of each webinar with log on instructions and information.

You can view a recording of the sessions after each session, so even if you need to miss one (or more), you can still hear the presentation.

More info – Call us at 410-733-3700   

Attend as many of these presentations as are of interest to you. Each session is about 90 minutes in duration. As always, there will be time for questions and discussions at the end of each program. 

The entire series is free, but we ask that you make a donation of $36 or more to help us defray the costs of providing this series. That works out to $6 for each session – truly a bargain for the valuable information and world class teachers that present it.

Click the link to register and for more information. We’ll send you the directions to join the webinar no less than 12 hours before the session.

Suggestions for future topics are welcome. 





Gamliel Institute will be offering course 4, Nechama [Comfort], online, evenings in the Spring on Tuesdays (and three Thursdays – the day of the week will change in those weeks with Jewish holidays during this course). The date of classes will be from March 28 to June 13 2017. Please note: due to holidays, classes will meet on Thursdays on April 13th, April 20th, and June 1st. There will be an orientation session on Monday, March 27th, 2017.


If you are not sure if the Nechama course is for you, plan to attend the free one-time online PREVIEW of Nechama session planned for Monday evening March 6th, 2017 at 8-9:30 pm EDST. The instructors will offer highlights from the material that the course covers, and let you know what the course includes. You can RSVP to or call 410-733-3700.

You can register for any Gamliel Institute courses online at A full description of all of the courses is found there.

For more information, visit the Gamliel Institute website, or look at information on the Gamliel Institute at the Kavod v’Nichum website or on the Gamliel.Institute website. Please contact us for information or assistance. or, or call 410-733-3700, or 925-272-8563.



Looking ahead, hold June 18-20, 2017 for the 15th annual Kavod v’Nchum Chevrah Kadisha and Jewish Cemetery Conference.

15th Annual North American Chevrah Kadisha and Jewish Cemetery Conference

At Congregation Rodef Sholom in San Rafael, California June 18-20, 2017

Registration is now open. Advance prices are good through the end of February. Group discounts are available.
The conference program will include plenaries and workshops focused on Taharah, Shmirah, Chevrah Kadisha organizing, community education, gender issues, cemeteries, text study and more.

The conference is on Sunday from noon until 10pm, on Monday from 7am to 10pm, and on Tuesday from 7am to 1pm. In addition to Sunday brunch, we provide six Kosher meals as part of your full conference registration. There are many direct flights to San Francisco and Oakland, with numerous options for ground transportation to the conference site.

We have negotiated a great hotel rate with Embassy Suites by Hilton. Please don’t wait to make your reservations. We also have home hospitality options. Contact us for information or to request home hospitality. 410-733-3700


Donations are always needed and most welcome. Donations support the work of Kavod v’Nichum and the Gamliel Institute, helping us to bring you the conference, offer community trainings, provide scholarships to students, refurbish and update course materials, expand our teaching, support programs such as Taste of Gamliel, provide and add to online resources, encourage and support communities in establishing, training, and improving their Chevrah Kadisha, and assist with many other programs and activities.

You can donate online at or by snail mail to: either Kavod v’Nichum, or to The Gamliel Institute, c/o David Zinner, Executive Director, Kavod v’Nichum, 8112 Sea Water Path, Columbia, MD  21045. Kavod v’Nichum [and the Gamliel Institute] is a recognized and registered 501(c)(3) organizations, and donations may be tax-deductible to the full extent provided by law. Call 410-733-3700 if you have any questions or want to know more about supporting Kavod v’Nichum or the Gamliel Institute.

You can also become a member (Individual or Group) of Kavod v’Nichum to help support our work. Click here (



If you would like to receive the Kavod v’Nichum Newsletter by email, or be added to the Kavod v’Nichum Chevrah Kadisha & Jewish Cemetery email discussion list, please be in touch and let us know at

You can also be sent an email link to the Expired And Inspired blog each week by sending a message requesting to be added to the distribution list to

Be sure to check out the Kavod V’Nichum website at, and for information on the Gamliel Institute and student work in this field also visit the Gamliel.Institute website.


Sign up on our Facebook Group page: just search for and LIKE Chevra Kadisha sponsored by Kavod vNichum, or follow our Twitter feed @chevra_kadisha.



If you have an idea for an entry you would like to submit to this blog, please be in touch. Email We are always interested in original materials that would be of interest to our readers, relating to the broad topics surrounding the continuum of Jewish preparation, planning, rituals, rites, customs, practices, activities, and celebrations approaching the end of life, at the time of death, during the funeral, in the grief and mourning process, and in comforting those dying and those mourning, as well as the actions and work of those who address those needs, including those serving in Bikkur Cholim, Caring Committees, the Chevrah Kadisha, Shomrim, funeral providers, funeral homes and mortuaries, and operators and maintainers of cemeteries.



Living chuppah can serve as family heirloom

Imagine standing under a beautiful, hand-embroidered chuppah that 25 years earlier your parents stood under as they became husband and wife. That is the legacy Los Angeles artist Robin Van Zak hopes to create every time she designs a one-of-a-kind heirloom lace bridal canopy.

The idea of passing down wedding keepsakes is not new, but it’s not commonly associated with the ceremonial chuppah. While many brides preserve their wedding gowns with the hope of one day passing it down to their daughter, the chuppah is often tucked away and rarely seen again. A family chuppah provides the perfect opportunity to create a “living” memory that can be shared from generation to generation.

Most couples understand what the bridal canopy represents, but its origins are more literal than many may realize. The chuppah’s roots go back to talmudic times, when, as explained by author Sol Zim in the “Joy of the Jewish Wedding,” after the ceremony, the groom “brought his bride into a ‘chupa,’ special living quarters arranged for the couple in the home of the groom’s parents.” By the 14th century, as the expense associated with building a separate space for the couple became too costly, the contemporary ceremonial chuppah, representing the new home that the couple would share as husband and wife, was born.

Because its beginnings are based in a life-cycle event, a bridal canopy that is shared among relatives highlights the importance of family. The simplicity of its frame comprised of four poles, four open sides and a cloth covering on top draw the wedding guests in, while at the same time provide an element of privacy for the couple. It’s as if they are embraced and protected by those who stood under the canopy before them.

For Van Zak, the idea for a multigenerational chuppah was born when her sister announced she was getting married. She wanted to create something special for her, something that was personal and representative of their family, something that could be shared for generations to come.

“I focused on the chuppah, because I have seen so many made out of flowers that cost tens of thousands of dollars and are thrown away by the end of the night. I thought this was a perfect opportunity to blend traditional elements with a contemporary flair,” she said.

After the wedding, a cloth patch was sewn into a corner listing the couple’s name and wedding date. Since then, at least one more name and date has been added, and its designer takes pride in knowing more will be added in years to come.

Van Zak focuses on finding premium lace, creating delicate designs that evoke a sense of romance and warmth. Each creation takes days to complete and brings a level of romance and elegance to a wedding symbol steeped in tradition.

Chuppahs have the ability to alter the mood of the ceremony and claim a far greater role than many couples might realize.

“The chuppah is the centerpiece of the wedding ceremony,” said Debbie Geller, owner of Geller Events, a boutique wedding and event planning company. “The bulk of the wedding photographs are taken there, and more than any other element of the wedding, it demonstrates the tone of the couple itself, whether traditional, modern, simple or elaborate.”

Rabbi Stewart Vogel of Temple Aliyah in Woodland Hills, who has officiated hundreds of weddings, speculates that “the people who take the time to create a personalized chuppah are probably people who are more likely to put more time and energy into their home — to recognize the importance of proactively creating the home that they want to create to reflect their values.”

Couples who are trying to decide if a living chuppah is right for them should take a tip from Van Zak herself, who uses inspiration as her guide in their creation.

“It’s when I see beautiful lace that I start the process,” she said. “I treat them as pieces of art; it’s my passion.”

What will inspire the couple as they stand there declaring their love and commitment? If it is finding comfort when looking up and knowing a piece of their love will be shared with their children and their children’s children, then a living chuppah is the perfect fit.

Allison Krumholz is a professional freelance writer who writes on a diversity of topics and has written for several publications, including Inside Weddings. She lives in Los Angeles.

Shtetl engagement custom makes modern comeback

When it comes to Jewish wedding customs, one could say everything old is new again.

According to numerous how-to-plan-your-Jewish-wedding Web sites, modern couples have resurrected tenaim (a 12th- century Ashkenazic tradition) and — after retrofitting the ritual — eagerly add the ceremony to their Big Day.

You’re invited to embrace this custom, too. But first, some backstory.

In European shtetls, tenaim (conditions) was a formal engagement ceremony at which parents of the girl and parents of the boy agreed to betroth their two children. During the celebration, a contract was signed, witnessed and read to the assemblage. This document set the date and time of the wedding — typically many months off — and outlined prenuptial obligations of each family regarding the dowry, a gift for the groom, plus other financial and logistical matters.

The contract included a proviso that the party who breaks the agreement before the wedding (p’tui, p’tui) must pay a stiff fine to the injured party. To seal the bargain, the future mothers-in-law smashed a dish. Some authorities say this symbolizes the impending breaks in their relationships with their children while recognizing that a new family is created — a family with lives of their own who now are responsible for taking care of and feeding each other.

Although the tenaim document — unlike the ketubah — is not a Jewish legal requirement for marriage, the tenaim had clout. In fact, the 18th century leader of Lithuanian Jewry, Rabbi Elijah ben Solomon Zalman (aka the Vilna Gaon), maintained that breaking the obligations of the agreement — backing down on one’s word — is reprehensible, far worse than divorce.

The Gaon also weighed in on tenaim plates and demanded they be ceramic, since “just as a ceramic plate cannot be repaired, so the families should be warned not to renege on their commitments.” (Word has it that unmarried women will trample over one another for a piece of the broken crockery, because it’s considered a talisman that leads to romance and chuppah. Could be….)

While modern tenaim ceremonies are based on the old model, today’s couples usually shift the focus from traditional legal formalities to personal conditions and concerns — both current and future — that express their love, trust, shared values and commitment to the covenant of marriage.

These conditions often include:

  • To create a Jewish home where Shabbat and holidays are celebrated, and where Jewish tradition is part of everyday life.
  • To create an open home where family, friends, community and strangers feel welcome.
  • To undertake tikkun olam (repair of the world), support social justice and give tzedakah (philanthropy) regularly.
  • To affirm the importance of diversity and equality in their community and in the world.
  • To work together as equal partners through life’s challenges.
  • To listen. To empathize with each other.
  • To support each other in their careers, while making time together their top priority.
  • To share financial and home responsibilities fairly.
  • To, God willing, be blessed with children and to raise them in a home filled with love for one another, dedication to Judaism and commitment to inclusiveness.

Some couples still plan tenaim as an anticipatory celebration well in advance of the nuptials. Others choose the weekend of the wedding, often at Havdalah, since the separation made between Shabbat and the rest of the week can also mark the distinction between “single” and “married.” Many brides and grooms schedule tenaim on the wedding day itself, an hour or so before the actual marriage ceremony. Any option works.

Clearly, modern tenaim celebrations can be original — even improvisational — while still including meaningful family traditions that link past, present and future. Additional proof that with Jewish wedding customs, what goes around comes around — in more ways than just circling the groom.

Ozzie Nogg is a freelance writer who takes a slightly offbeat look at the history and observance of Jewish holidays, festivals and life-cycle events. Her Web site is

An incomplete guide to Jewish funerals and burial

When Eileen Isenberg thinks about her own funeral, she has a very clear picture in her mind.

“First I want 20 minutes of sad,” she said, to allow people to remember her, with the second movement of Mozart's 21st Piano Concerto playing in the background.

“Then I want people to bring out the klezmer music and platters of all different kinds of rugelach and chat about the good stuff and the fun.”

When it's time to push the casket down the aisle, she wants a band she's already picked one to break into “When the Saints Go Marching In,” New Orleans-style, and the mourners to step in line and escort the casket to graveside.

“I want to leave my dear friends with a sweet taste in their mouths and a twinkle in their hearts,” said Isenberg, 77, a Reform Jew who isn't planning to die anytime soon.

This is definitely not what a Jewish funeral used to be. At least not in the non-Orthodox world.

When it comes to thinking about the end of life, be it in the business of funeral homes or in the minds of Jews everywhere, the world is changing.

“It's not about mourning the death anymore. People want to celebrate life,” said Isenberg's daughter, Lynn, a Marina del Rey resident who launched a customized funeral planning business, “Lights Out Enterprises,” after penning the novel, “The Funeral Planner” (Red Dress Ink, 2005). Lynn Isenberg believes mourners can celebrate without compromising the life and integrity of the deceased.

Blame it on the baby boomers. One outgrowth of the aging of 78 million largely nontraditional Americans born between 1946 and 1964 is that they are revolutionizing the final frontier with personalized send-offs, both for themselves and their parents.

You can also blame it on our death-denying, death-defying culture. Why fall back on those morose, antiquated and tiresome rituals when we can put some “fun” back into the $11 billion funeral service industry?

And you can blame it on the high cost of dying. And the lower cost of cremation. Along with the opportunity to have our ashes mixed with cement and forged into an artificial reef ball, to rest eternally on the ocean floor.

Or blame it on ignorance of Jewish burial and funeral customs. The fact that we don't know a grave from a crypt. Or what to do if we happen to be unaffiliated, intermarried or tattooed.

Still, while not everyone is jumping on the “I gotta be me” funeral bandwagon, a funny thing is happening on the way to the mortuary.

These days, more and more Jews are breathing new life into Judaism's age-old approach to death and dying. They're also sometimes discovering that the rituals the ones that have always been followed by the Torah-observant world can speak to them as well in fresh and personal ways.

For traditional Jews, this is no surprise.

“It's been done this way for 3,600 years,” said Moe Goldsman, who has served as funeral director and mortuary manager at Sholom Chapels Mortuaries and Sholom Memorial Park in Sylmar since 1989. “If it ain't broke, don't fix it.”

As with most things Jewish, the practices governing burials are based on Torah: “Dust thou art and unto dust thou shalt return” (Genesis 3:19), as well as, “As we come forth, so shall we return” (Ecclesiastes 5:14).

They also operate on the principles of respect, speed and simplicity, rendering everyone equal in death, with these key components:

  • Nothing should be done to prohibit the natural decomposition of the body. Embalming or cosmetic enhancement is prohibited.
  • The body is accompanied or watched from the time of death until burial. It is ritually cleansed and dressed in white linen shrouds.
  • Burial is in a plain wooden casket, with no metal parts. The casket remains closed.
  • Burial takes place in the ground, as soon as possible.
  • Flowers are discouraged. Charitable contributions are instead suggested.


Historically, each community's holy society, or chevra kadisha (not to be confused with the Los Angeles for-profit mortuary by the same name), took on the responsibility of caring for the deceased, considered the most sacred task in Judaism because it's a mitzvah that cannot be repaid. Over the years, the non-Orthodox community has relinquished this obligation to the care of strangers.






Jon Kalish of NPR's 'All Things Considered' recorded a chevra kadisha preparing a body


“Someone passes away, you call the mortuary and they pick up the body. You're totally removed,” said Sinai Temple's Cantor Joseph Gole. “It wasn't too many generations ago that you did taharah (the ritual cleansing and purification of the body) right on the kitchen table, in the house.”

Tachrichim or shrouds, Hillside Mortuary

USC Trojans march for restored Torah; Backyard tashlich in Fairfax

Trojans Greet Restored Torah
When the Trojan fight song rings out at a Torah restoration ceremony, where else could you be but at USC?

About 100 people gathered Sunday under the shade of sycamore trees in front of the university’s Bovard Auditorium to witness the ceremonial completion of a restored Torah scroll that will become the centerpiece of religious life at the Chabad Jewish Student Center.
“It’s an honor just to be here,” said Kaley Zeitouni, a sophomore. “I really feel like I’m witnessing an important moment in this community’s Jewish history. Every time I see the scroll at services I’ll remember that I was part of this event.”
Rabbi Aaron Schaffier, one of two Torah scribes involved in the scroll’s restoration, said the scroll is between 70 and 80 years old and probably originated in Eastern Europe. Its long journey to USC included a layover in Massachusetts, where it was used for several decades at a synagogue that has now merged with other congregations.
The ceremony was particularly moving for Abe Skaletzky, who was visiting his daughter, Michele, another sophomore at USC.
“I’m a ba’al teshuvah,” Skaletzky said. “So knowing this scroll might help other people return to Torah means a lot to me.”
After the last details of the restoration were complete, Schaffier stitched the scroll to its wooden dowels with kosher sinew. Rabbi Dov Wagner carried the Torah from Bovard Auditorium to the Chabad House under a chuppah to symbolize the scroll’s new life.
And that’s when seven members of USC’s marching band brought the moment to life. They began the procession with a rendition of the Trojan fight song, prompting students in the crowd to hold up the two-finger sign for victory.
During its installation at the Chabad House, the scroll was dedicated to the late Sandra Brand, a Holocaust survivor who established a fund to support the restoration of Torah scrolls to be donated to college communities.
— Nick Street, Contributing Writer
Backyard Tashlich in Fairfax
For a few years on Rosh Hashanah — until the raccoons ate all the fish and the fishpond was turned into a giant planter — members of Ohev Shalom, a small Orthodox shul on Fairfax Avenue, gathered in my parents’ yard for Tashlich.
The “pond,” mind you, is about four feet in diameter and maybe a foot deep. But it’ll do for the landlocked mid-Wilshire residents who don’t drive on Rosh Hashanah and want to participate in the custom of Tashlich, which literally means to cast off.
Orthodox residents across the city seek out small bodies of water in which to throw bread crumbs, symbolizing their sins, as they recite atonement-related prayers on the first day of Rosh Hashanah (unless, like this year, it falls on Shabbat).
Tashlich is a custom, not a law, and can be recited anytime during the 10 Days of Repentance between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. Ideally, the water should be flowing and have fish in it, but that isn’t always possible, so a small reservoir — or my parents’ fish pond — works, too.
A small slab of the L.A. River runs through Beverlywood, some people gather there on Rosh Hashanah to toss their sins through the chainlink fence into the trickle of water muddying up the concrete cutout.
Maybe not quite what the rabbis had in mind when they based the tradition on the quote in Micah, “And you will all their sins into the depths of the sea.” But then again, if bread crumbs can symbolize sins, why not fish ponds as the depths of the sea?
— Julie Gruenbaum Fax, Education Editor


Oh Jerusalem

On June 6, or Iyar 28, we will celebrate Yom Yerushalayim (Jerusalem Day) in honor of the day Jerusalem was reunified during the Six-Day War in 1967.

An Original Word

Etymology – this means “the origin of a word,” or where the word came from. For instance: the word “cap” comes from the Latin word caput, meaning “head.”

Answer these etymological questions:

1. The Assyrians called it Ursalimmu; the Greeks and Romans called it Hierosolyma. What do we call it today?

2. If you got the first question right, answer this one:

The last part of the word is oka.

What does this word mean in Hebrew?

3. And finally: did you answer the second question? So, what does the name of the city mean? It is the city of ________.

Unscramble these letters to get the name of a town in Massachusetts that has a similar name to Jerusalem. (Hint: it wasn’t a very “peaceful” place. They had witch hunts there in the 16th century.)


Why are so many weddings in June?

Fill in the blanks with the following words to get some interesting information about the month of June:

bath, custom, May, flowers, good, smell, married

Next time your Mom reminds you take a bath, think of this fact: back in the 1500s, most people got ______ in June because they took their yearly ____ in _____, and still smelled pretty ______ by June. However, they were starting to ______, so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor.

That is how the _______ of a bride carrying a bouquet got started!


Kick Off the Year Rolling in Dough

As most people know, challah is the braided egg-rich loaf of bread that we traditionally eat on the Sabbath and holidays — two loaves of challah at each of the three Shabbat meals. They help commemorate the miracles that the Jewish people experienced during their 40 years of wandering in the desert. While on weekdays they received one portion of manna from heaven, Friday God sent two portions.

Challah — especially homemade — is wonderful every week, but it resonates with deeper meaning at Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, when it is an age-old custom to dip it (at least the first piece) in honey after reciting the appropriate blessing to beseech God to grant us a sweet year.

For Rosh Hashanah, challah is often shaped into a crown or a turban, and raisins are often added to make it even sweeter. Throughout the whole holiday period — through Sukkot — many people follow the custom of preparing or buying round loaves instead of the traditional long, braided ones: a reminder of the cycle of the seasons. Some very ambitious people add a braid in the center in the shape of a ladder, in the fervent hope that we merit both physical and spiritual uplift during the coming year.

The round challah custom is ideal for yours truly: I confess to being braid-impaired. While every preschool child in Israel seems to know how to form beautiful, even braids, I never learned this in Minnesota. Even my three-part braids (I have rarely attempted anything like six or more braids) leave much to be desired in the evenly braided department.

My solution? Round challahs — they always come out nice, look impressive, and no one can believe how easy they are to make. You can either make one long braid and then roll it up, or use the following recipe and baking method. The smell is indescribable. For more details on challah — actually on all aspects of bread baking, see any Jewish cookbook: all the myriad details won’t fit into this article. The mitzvah of separation of challah must be observed along with Jewish law — ask your local rabbi for more information.

Challah should be allowed to cool completely before being well-wrapped for storage. Well-sealed challah can be stored for a day or so on the shelf, or frozen. It defrosts well, and no one can tell that it’s not freshly baked. You can even freeze the ready-to-bake dough. This is good to know in the busy preholiday period.

May this be a sweet year for the entire Jewish people.

Sweet Round Challah

2 tablespoons instant dry yeast

1/2 cup sugar

1/2 cup oil

Approximately 9 cups of flour (divided), sifted

1 tablespoon salt

5 eggs (divided)

2 cups warm water

1/2 cup golden raisins (optional)

Sesame seeds

Poppy seeds

Combine yeast, sugar and oil in a large bowl. Stir in about 3 cups of flour; combine well. Add salt and four well-beaten eggs, one at a time. Add water and mix in well. Sift in enough flour, 2 cups at a time, to form a dough for kneading, beating well after each addition. Add raisins, if desired.

Knead for eight to 10 minutes, adding a bit more flour if necessary. Place dough in a greased bowl and turn to grease all sides. Cover with a damp cloth and allow to rise in a warm place until double in bulk-about one and a half to two hours.

Punch down, fold in sides, cover and allow to rise for about another half hour. Punch down. Divide dough in half. Coat two 8- or 9-inch diameter pans (look for pans that are at least 3-inches high) with nonstick cooking spray. Form a ball of dough about 3 1/2 inches in diameter and place in center of pan. Divide rest of dough into eight even portions, forming eight balls of dough, and surround center ball of dough. Repeat with remaining half of dough.

Cover pans and allow to rise in a warm place until doubled in bulk. Brush with beaten egg. Sprinkle both sesame and poppy seeds on the two middle balls. Sprinkle sesame and poppy seeds alternately on each of the outside balls of each challah. Bake in a preheated 350 F oven for 35-40 minutes until golden brown and challah sounds hollow when tapped on the bottom. Remove from pans immediately and cool on a rack.

Makes two round challahs.

Love Spelled G-O-L-D

“I am my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine.”

This beautiful expression of commitment from Song of Songs,
is for many Jewish couples the perfect way to say “I love you” every day —
without uttering a word.

Called the “Ani l’dodi v’dodi li” in Hebrew, it adorns many
a wedding band. For other couples, only an exquisite diamond ring will do. And
for the majority, the solid gold wedding band remains, as it has through the
ages, the ring of choice. Though choosing a wedding band is a matter of
personal taste and preference, it is also a matter that Jewish tradition weighs
in on. Most importantly, the ring must be one solid piece, with no stones of
any kind, gaps or perforations. It should be purchased by the groom, or be a
family heirloom from his side. As for Hebrew lettering, engraving or embossing
— that’s a little open to interpretation.

For couples seeking advice, the guidelines concerning
wedding bands are “an easy topic to broach,” said Rabbi Judah Dardik. There are
two aspects, explains the Orthodox rabbi.

The “unbroken circle is a beautiful concept,” he said. Under
the Talmud, “our custom is not to use rings with any stones in them. The woman
has to know exactly what she is getting, with no false pretense.” A stone that
to the untrained eye may sparkle like a diamond might indeed be glass. And a suitor
who would be so disingenuous as to try and fool his bride-to-be is nothing more
than an impostor.

Whether etchings are permitted under Jewish law, “that’s
more of a question,” Dardik said. An etching “takes out some of the metal. Does
that make it difficult to evaluate the value [of the ring]?”

Orthodox Rabbi Jacob Traub said inscriptions and Hebrew
letters are “OK,” and the ring “can be ornate, to a certain degree.”

Traub does share Dardik’s concern: “The main thing is no
stones, because it’s important that the bride know exactly what it is she is
getting.” In his years counseling engaged couples and officiating weddings,
Traub has found that for the “overwhelming majority” of couples, “the plain
band I think is still your band of choice.”

Rabbi Daniel Kohn said the ring is a “minor issue [that] is
only for the wedding ceremony itself.”

Owners of jewlery shops with a significant Jewish clientele
say their selection of bands runs the gamut.

“Given the fact that we certainly live in an assimilated culture,
Jews buy the full range of gold rings,” said Bill Caplan of Topper. His store
carries a large range of finely made modern wedding bands, including ones with
Hebrew lettering, though “religious Jews,” he said, “mainly use simple metal
bands for the ceremony.”

In his family jewelry business since the 1960s, Caplan said
styles have changed somewhat. “In the ’70s, there were a lot of very heavy, big
pieces. Today, they’re more delicate, smoother.”

Ellen Bob of bob and bob in Palo Alto, said even married
couples purchase bands with the “Ani l’dodi,” for a “special anniversary” as an
affirmation of longstanding love.

“It’s sort of like a little intimate secret. It’s not
obvious that it’s words, but it is something that you and your partner share in
a special way.” Jewish couples who come to her store also favor another
selection from Song of Songs, she added: “This is my beloved, this is my

Afikomen’s wedding shop carries a selection of bands with
Hebrew on them, but “these are not the most popular,” noted owner Jerry
Derblich. “People seem to want a more traditional ring.” His bestseller, in
fact, is the narrow gold band.

“The ‘Ani l’dodi’ are fairly wide,” he explained. There is,
however, great variation among the seven to eight vendors he uses.

The owners of Edelweiss Jewelers in Berkeley don’t go far
for their Hebrew bands: husband and wife Robert and Anne Flexer both make them.

Nearly 14 years ago, Robert Flexer said, “one customer came
in and asked me to enlarge such a band. I started asking a lot of questions.”
He said one thing led to another, and “I made one just to see…. Now I have a
whole collection.”

Anne Flexer began crafting them about four years ago.
“People ask for different quotes from the Bible. Their names — his and hers,”
she said of the commissions that come her way. “They prefer Hebrew lettering;
they don’t want something in English. It’s meaningless to them.”

Flexer said she provides a needed service to the Jewish

“Outside of Hebrew letters, very few things, motifs, that
you can use are typically Jewish. How many different kinds of rings can you
make with the Star of David?”

Hebrew letters, on the other hand, “are so unique. Given
that we don’t write the vowels, you can really pack in a lot of text.”

As for her favorite expression of love, the “Ani l’dodi” is
“one of the best that I know of,” she said. Â

Standup, Sit-down, See the Light

Picture 20 massage tables, with people lying down and being gently touched, with music playing in the background. On Yom Kippur.

That was the custom at Makom Ohr Shalom in Woodland Hills. Although it’s been modified to sitting on tables, it’s one of the off-beat traditions at the XX synagogue. "Each time I had the opportunity to do that to others, and to lie on the table myself, I had the sense that not only does your mind, heart and soul experience Yom Kippur, but also your body," said Rabbi Zalman Schachter-Shalomi, who leads services at the Woodland Hills synagogue every Yom Kippur.

"It is simply holding people in a gentle way to say that you can let go and relax, and all the knots that are in your body, that feel unforgiven, on Yom Kippur, you can let go of that."

It is the 10th year that 78-year-old Reb Zalman (as Schachter-Shlomi is known), will be traveling from his home in Boulder, Colo. to lead the Yom Kippur services at Makom Ohr Shalom. Like congregants in most other Los Angeles synagogues on Yom Kippur, Makom Ohr Shalom members do the typical Yom Kippur thing — fasting and praying — but the service is not your average sit-all-day-in-your-seat affair. The service at Makom Ohr Shalom includes elements of meditation, teaching, questions and music, and eschews the practice of only giving aliyot to the synagogue big shots. Instead, they have mass aliyot, where everyone can share the aliyah, so that no one feels left out.

For Reb Zalman, it is a service that has all the spiritual characteristics he is looking for. "When you enter a synagogue," said Reb Zalman, "it is not only that you enter the synagogue with your body, but you are entering the sacred space, a safe and sacred space where you are allowed to enter into altered consciousness. This is what Makom Ohr Shalom provides."

While Yom Kippur massages are not the norm in most synagogues, neither is Reb Zalman. He is a Chabad renegade who is as at home with Buddhists and Sufis as he is with the many thousands of Jews that he bought back to Judaism.

He began his rabbinical career as an outreach rabbi and student of Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneersohn, the late Lubavitcher Rebbe, who taught him in all matters spiritual. "Chabad had wonderful things that nobody had in Judaism," Reb Zalman said. "They taught you how to meditate, they taught you how to daven in depth, they taught you how to understand the kabbalistic cosmology, and the psychology, so that you can work on your own transformation."

Still, Reb Zalman eventually broke with Chabad and Orthodoxy, because he felt that traditions needed to move forward. "It is not as if all of a sudden I had these ideas and there was a rebellion," he said of his break. "The point here is that Orthodoxy said ‘as we used to do it before, so we always have to do it,’ which doesn’t allow for historical development. I looked in Jewish history, and I saw that the Baal Shem Tov [the rabbi credited with founding the Chasidic movement] did not just restore things to what it was earlier, he was renewing things, which is to say, ‘How do we do in our generation what they did in their generation?’"

It was his passion for rejuvenation that lead Reb Zalman to start the Jewish Renewal Movement in the 1960s. Jewish Renewal is an approach to Judaism that is based on five tenets: an appreciation of Jewish mysticism, davenology (a term Reb Zalman coined, which is a way of approaching prayer so that it becomes "experiential"), feminism, environmentalism (which Reb Zalman calls being eco-kosher) and a nontriumphalist approach to Judaism. "Most of the religions in the past have said that when their messiah comes, that will show that they have been right and all the others are wrong," said Reb Zalman, explaining the last tenet. "Our point is no. All religions are like vital organs of the planet, and you can’t cut one out and expect that [it] will live."

Reb Zalman has also been instrumental in promoting interreligious dialogue. He was part of an eight-member delegation of Jewish religious leaders who traveled to Dharamsala, India, to visit the Dalai Lama in exile to have an exchange of spiritual ideas. He encourages his congregants to have a Muslim come and hold the baby and read the opening of the Koran before a brit milah, because Muslims also practice circumcision. He also invites Muslims to his house for dinner during Ramadan, so that they don’t have to cook while they are fasting. He does this because he believes that spiritual dialogue will accomplish what politics cannot.

For Reb Zalman, it is the passion he feels for his religion that drives him. "It is not a burning angry intensity," he said, "but a very loving intensity."

My Very Own Chuppah

Hold onto your son’s baby blanket. Don’t give away your daughter’s cheerleading uniform. If they hold precious memories and deep meanings, you may be able to recycle them — as part of your child’s chuppah.

Chuppahs and ketubahs are long-standing Jewish wedding traditions. But Los Angeles couples are now taking their heritage to a more personal place, using chuppahs and ketubahs with intimate, as well as religious, significance. And they are asking their parents to help them create these special wedding fixtures.

With their parents’ assistance, Los Angeles-area brides and grooms are trading in hotel rent-a-coverings and standard flowered archways for chuppahs they can truly call their own. Joan and Joel Schrier of Brentwood helped their daughter and son-in-law produce a patchwork chuppah. Joan Schrier, a Skirball Cultural Center docent, sent out 36 fabric squares to her daughter’s wedding guests, asking the friends and relatives to decorate their swatch with a meaningful illustration.

"Weddings all have common denominators: a white bridal dress, a band and not-so-wonderful food. This was a way to make Kimberly and David’s wedding unique to them," Schrier said. She collected the finished squares and her husband sewed them into the quilt under which their daughter, Kimberly Gowing, married.

Gowing, a pediatrician, attended Palisades High School with her husband David, a singer-songwriter. The former classmates started dating after their 10-year reunion and married on July 1, 2001, at the Skirball.

"It was amazing to stand under the chuppah, glance up during the ceremony and see how many special people contributed to our day," Gowing said. Cherished chuppah panels displayed the handprints of a 6-month-old niece, a non-Jewish friend’s Tree of Life and Joan Schrier’s embroidered Rashi quote. The Gowings, who now live in Seattle and attend Temple De Hirsch Sinai, plan to prominently display their chuppah in their home.

The quilt chuppah is a fast-growing Los Angeles wedding trend. Nicole Jessel Heilman, who attends Temple Judea in Tarzana, also recruited her guests’ talents. "I wanted to get my family and friends involved with our wedding," she said.

Heilman, a teacher, was married at the Bel Air Bay Club under a schoolhouse painted by her kindergarten teacher, photos scanned by a childhood friend and a police car she designed for her husband, Dave, a law enforcement officer. Heilman’s mother, Maxine Jessel, spearheaded her daughter’s chuppah effort. "It’s the way people who shared in their lives could share in their ceremony," said Jessel, owner of The Max Event Coordinators.

Variations on the patchwork chuppah are springing up around the Southland. Some couples turn to themselves, not their guests, for square ideas. Newlyweds-to-be have sewn together fabric swatches from memory-filled clothing like football jerseys, baby blankets, beach towels from a first date at Zuma and even college pennants.

Carol Attia, owner of Under The Chuppah Online, has seen a significant increase in personalized chuppahs during her 10 years in business. She believes these self-designed chuppahs truly enhance a wedding day.

"A wedding is so personal, people want their chuppah to reflect who they are," said Attia, recalling one bride’s chuppah made of white fairy lights. She sewed her favorite chuppah out of the mother-of-the-bride and mother-in-law’s wedding dresses.

"The couple married under this chuppah viewed their wedding not as a union of two people but as a union of two families," Attia said. "It’s wonderful that couples now feel free enough to express their love through creative concepts," she added.

Los Angeles couples and their parents display this same creativity with their original ketubah designs. While ketubah prints and texts can be purchased at Judaic galleries, catalogs and Web sites, many Angelenos produce their own. Original artwork can highlight everything from the couple’s hobbies to their engagement stories.

Jessel recently created a ketubah that incorporated the newlywed’s occupations. A teacher and a veterinarian, the couple’s ketubah was covered with animals and children. "Bride and grooms really want the ketubah art to represent their lives, and their two worlds coming together," Jessel said.

Michah Parker, president of, just constructed a ketubah using a grandmother’s painting of the bride and groom at sunset. Parker noted that the number of nonconventional ketubah requests he receives has increased every year since 1995. He credits this trend to technology

"Nontraditional, abstract, even bizarre, ketubah art and language has become more popular. When people surf the Internet, they get new and unusual ideas," Parker said. "Plus, now we can download art files, like the grandmother’s work, or a friend’s painting, so we have the ability to accommodate original ideas," he added.

Gene and Ruth Kirshner, members of Temple Beth El in San Pedro, enlisted modern technology to produce their daughter, Shana Johnson’s, ketubah. Gene Kirshner authored the ketubah text and created the artwork on his home computer. "I once did a sample photo mat that looked like the two tablets. I had that in mind when I designed the art," said Kirshner, who once owned a framing business.

The proud father shaped his daughter’s ketubah like the covenant tablets. "I’ve been putting away ketubah texts and ideas for years, in anticipation of my children’s weddings. A ketubah is more meaningful if it has the exact words and images you want," Kirshner said.

Johnson, a physician’s assistant, and her husband Matt, a Score Learning Center executive, married on March 25, 2001 at La Venta Inn in Palos Verdes. Johnson beams as she talks about her cherished ketubah. "I love it. It really captures our relationship, and it means even more to me and Matt because my Dad made it for us," Johnson said. Their ketubah, written in English, is bordered in the same deep rose color as Johnson’s bridesmaid’s dresses.

"It’s so much more special and personal than the standard ketubah. It was a way to take the Jewish heritage and make it our own," said Johnson, whose ketubah hangs in her living room.

This desire to mesh Jewish culture with personal expression seems to drive these wedding trends. In producing their own chuppahs and ketubahs, couples weave their religious ties with their own lives. And in doing so, perhaps they are starting their own tradition.

Gowing was so moved by her personalized chuppah and her parent’s involvement, she hopes to continue the custom when she has children of her own. "I’d love if they got married under our quilt chuppah, but with an added a perimeter of squares made just for them," Gowing said. Perhaps this new nuptial trend is actually becoming a new nuptial tradition.

Purim in the Land of Esther

Picture Queen Esther. Now, take those golden locks and replace them with thick black tresses, and instead of those big round baby blues, imagine almond shaped eyes the color of onyx. And that creamy white complexion? Try something a little tawnier, a little more olive.

Now you have a closer picture of what the real Esther probably looked like: A beautiful Persian Jewish woman, very likely the same lineage as the beautiful Persian Jewish women who today populate the Los Angeles Jewish community.

Iranian Jews seem to be more amused than offended by the storybook and mask depiction of the Nordic-looking Queen Esther. Persian Jews, after all, never harbored any misconceptions about who Esther was. Purim’s Persian venue makes the holiday and its prelude, the Fast of Esther, an integral part of the Iranian Jewish identity.

"Esther and Mordechai existed in the conscious and subconscious during the whole year," said Rabbi David Shofet of Nessah Israel Congregation and Education Center in Santa Monica. In the shrine- and pilgrimage-focused Middle East, Jews would often make the trek to pray at the tombs of Esther and Mordechai.

"It was the Jewish place to go and ask and pray and cry," Shofet said, "especially when it was difficult to go to Israel and the Kotel HaMaaravi," the Western Wall.

The tombs of Esther and Mordechai are in the city of Hamadan, the site of Megillat Esther’s Shushan, about halfway between Teheran and Baghdad.

According to traditional Jewish sources, the story of Purim took place in the mid-300s BCE, during the rule of the Persian-Median Empire and the Babylonian exile, after the destruction of the First Temple and before the building of the Second Temple.

King Ahasuerus succeeded Cyrus, the Persian king who allowed the Jews to begin rebuilding the Temple in Jerusalem that Nebuchadnezzar had destroyed. Ahasuerus and Esther are said to be the parents of Darius, another king who permitted Jews in Persia to return to Jerusalem, something Ahasuerus had prohibited.

But many Jews in the Babylonian exile chose to stay where they had already set down roots and built a community infrastructure that centuries later would produce the Babylonian Talmud.

Today’s Persian and Iraqi Jews trace their lineage back to those communities.

"It is amazing to continuously have communities in this land for 2,700 years. It’s amazing how they kept themselves Jewish and survived," especially in a region that has seen so much war and revolution, Rabbi Shofet said.

While many Jews left Iran after the 1979 revolution, about 25,000 to 30,000 Jews remain in the country — about the same number there are in Los Angeles.

So while the Purim story may seem removed and foreign to AshkenaziJews sitting and reading the Megillah, to Persian Jews the story is about family, and it hits much closer to home.

"I think it has more significant meaning to us," said Fariba Ramin, a businesswoman who is a member of Sephardic Temple Tifereth Israel in Westwood. "For those people who come from Europe and have been through the war, through Auschwitz, they probably feel it more than those of us that were away from it," she said. "It’s the same thing with Purim — we probably feel it more than the rest of the Jewish people."

Maybe that’s why Taanit Esther is so widely kept among Persian Jews, observant or not. In the Megillah, Esther proclaims three days of fasting and praying before she approaches Ahasuerus to reveal her identity and foil Haman’s decree to destroy all the Jews in the Persian empire.

Rabbi Shofet says he even remembers effigies of Haman being hung and burned in backyards, with kids poking at the dummy, though he says the practice is not widespread anymore.

Other Haman traditions remain. The custom of drowning out Haman’s name in a joyous cacophony is as strong among Persians as it is elsewhere in the Jewish community. Fariba Sameyach, a preschool teacher at Harkham Hillel Hebrew Academy, says her husband’s family wrote songs about Haman, and he still sings them every year.

In Iran, Purim itself was a festive night and day, fun especially for the kids. Traditional foods were exchanged, and children often received gifts and coins. The custom of giving coins is probably connected to Purim’s proximity to the Iranian New Year, celebrated on the spring equinox, much as western Chanukah has been influenced by the December holiday season.

Wearing costumes is not a Persian custom, but emissaries and educators who arrived in Iran from Israel brought the notion, and Persian children in America today do enjoy dressing up.

Ellie Salemnia, a Realtor who is also a member of Sephardic Temple Tifereth Israel, said while the Persian customs remain central to her family’s celebrations, she always encouraged her children, now 19 and 24, to partake of the American customs.

"We have our own cultural things, and we are getting good things from the American Jewish culture," she said. "The combination is very good for the kids; it gives them a very rich background."

Mishloach manot (a gift of food sent to friends) generally does not come with big puffs of cellophane in the Persian community, but takes the form of a plate of halvah — not the crumbly sesame candy found in the store, but a homemade delicacy that is sweet, perfumy, and, above all other traditions, the strongest association Persians seem to have with Purim.

Wherever Persian Jews go on Purim, there are mounds of halvah that everyone has brought to share with everyone else.

Halvah (see recipes) is made of browned rice, wheat or almond flour and mixed with rose water and any combination of sugar, oil, cardamom, saffron or other spices. It is about half an inch thick, the color of amber and the consistency of cookie dough, and is usually cut into diamond shapes. Spices and ingredients vary by region and family, with some people adding dates or chopped pistachios.

Like much of Persian cooking, says Salemnia, the halvah exchange is competitive and joyful.

"I talk with Persian ladies and say I’m doing this spice, I use these ingredients. It’s part of a competition, but it’s also part of connecting and talking with each other," Salemnia said.

No one I spoke with was able to say why halvah became Purim’s food. It is also eaten by the Muslim Persians, primarily on the nights of Ramadan, when they’ve been fasting all day.

Rabbi Shofet joked that on Purim, "we had so much halvah we couldn’t have a seudah," the festive meal on Purim day. But, he says, even those who did hold a seudah did not get drunk, as is the widespread custom among other Jewish communities.

There is special significance in giving halvah to someone who is in the first year of mourning, "to make them enjoy life again and have a sweet mouth for next year," Ramin said.

Mourners also traditionally do not go to synagogue, and so the reading of the Megillah is done among family and friends in the mourner’s home.

Shofet recalled a similar custom — not so widely practiced now — for newly engaged couples. The groom, if he is learned enough, reads the entire Megillah for the friends and family of the bride in her home.

The tradition of giving charity to the poor, matanot la’evyonim, is central to the Persian celebration of Purim.

Of course, when it comes down to it, Purim actually has a message that is universal to all Jews, no matter where their ancestors happened to land centuries ago in the dispersion.

"It’s kind of a turning point and an alarming point in the year," Shofet said.

Because wherever you are in the world on Purim, whatever your customs, Pesach is just four weeks — four weeks! — away.

Finding Middle Ground

First comes love, then comes marriage. But when baby makes three, an interfaith couple has to face hard decisions about their child’s religious upbringing. Arlene Chernow, who for 16 years has headed the outreach department for the Pacific Southwest Council of the Union of American Hebrew Congregations, believes it’s vital for parents to commit to a single religious identity for the entire family. If the interfaith family rejoices in Shabbat and other Jewish holidays, their youngster will not be perturbed by the fact that some relatives wrap holiday gifts in red and green, and celebrate the birth of baby Jesus. If, from the start, the child knows he or she lives in a Jewish household, Hebrew school can be a strong and positive experience.

Unfortunately, says Chernow, “we see more and more children coming into classrooms not knowing who they are religiously.” In some cases, non-Jewish spouses are resentful of the religious school obligation, fearing the loss of their own religious identity as their youngsters are schooled in Jewish tradition. At times, a child’s enrollment in Hebrew school sparks a tug of war between two parents who can’t articulate to one another their own feelings about their religious inheritance. If parents divorce, the situation intensifies.

Chernow feelingly describes one small boy who was brought to temple religious school weekly by his non-Jewish dad, then went home with his Jewish mother. At first, the child dealt with the turmoil in his home life by disrupting the classroom, making everyone miserable. Finally, he settled on his own private solution. Once he arrived at school, he would duck under his desk for 10 minutes, speaking to no one. Then he’d emerge, saying, “I’m Jewish now.”

When Chernow meets with Jewish religious school educators, she stresses their crucial role in making an interfaith family feel part of the congregation. One challenge for a teacher is reassuring interfaith children that they are truly welcome in the classroom, no matter what non-Jewish customs and attitudes may persist at home. These children often ask tough questions, because they’re covertly seeking to establish the fact that they’re truly Jewish. For Chernow, the three key strategies are “support, respect, refocus.” If, during a lesson on Chanukah, a little girl asks why daddy has a Christmas tree, the teacher should support the girl as a valued member of the class, encourage respect for each family’s individual choices, and — for the benefit of the rest of the students — refocus the discussion on dreidels and Maccabees.
When a child hops into the car after Hebrew school, excitedly displaying an ornament for the sukkah, it’s only natural for his non-Jewish parent to feel intimidated by this unfamiliar holiday. Chernow points out that parents who want to share in their children’s excitement can turn out to be a hidden asset in the classroom. She has met many non-Jewish mothers, in particular, who strongly desire a religious identity for their family. Once they gain a basic knowledge of Jewish practice, they sometimes become the teacher’s best friend.

Such is the case of Patty Lombard, the mother of two daughters at Temple Israel of Hollywood. Though herself a Catholic, Lombard has spearheaded the writing of a parents’ guide called “Celebrations.” This looseleaf notebook — which includes background on each major Jewish holiday along with vocabulary, activities, recipes, songs and blessings — was presented to every preschool family when school began in September. The purpose, Lombard says, is to “try to give parents enough information that they can enjoy celebrating with their child.”

Chernow insists that parent education is the key to turning an interfaith family into a family engaged in raising happily Jewish children. She says, “I really see a child’s Jewish education as something that has an impact on the whole family. The more that a temple and school can do to educate the parent while they’re educating the children, the stronger the child’s identity will be.”

New Year’s Sounds

The number “three” doesn’t play an especially important part in Jewish lore and customs. But the pre-High Holy Day musical rush brought to my desk several trios of related recordings, so it’s fitting to deal with them in groups of threes.

1. Three sets ostensibly inspired by Jewish mysticism:

Dieter Buwen and Günter Priesner: “Die Sephiroth” (Col Legno). Buwen is both composer and organist, accompanying saxophonist Priesner on this rather academic program of duets. An earnest but dull remnant of late high modernism, the title piece inadvertently points up the limitations of classical sax technique, ignoring the expressive possibilities of the instrument almost completely. Buwen is self-effacing in the extreme, content to provide ground figures for Preisner to bounce off. Strange to think that one could write music this bland about a subject so charged with emotion. Rating: Two Stars.

Hasidic New Wave: “Kabalogy” (JAM). This is HNW’s weakest set to date, a rather tepid collection of Jewish jazz-rock cliches, well played but uninspired. Frank London and Greg Wall are incapable of making an album that is without interest, but I expect more from these guys. And the Dead Kennedys remake attacking Rudy Giuliani is just shrill. Rating: Three Stars.

Zohar: “Keter” (JAM). Wow! Zohar is Uri Caine’s Jewish project (as opposed to his hard-bop piano gigs), spearheaded by his incredibly fluent keyboard work and the vocal gymnastics of Sephardi Cantor Aaron Bensoussan, aided immeasurably by percussionist Gilad, among others. A seamless amalgam of Middle-Eastern and Sephardic musics with post-bop jazz and one of the most exciting records I have heard all year. From a flamenco-ish “Eyshet Chayil” to a salsa-rhythmed ode to the temple, this is brilliant stuff. Caine’s powerful two-handed attack echoes McCoy Tyner and Herbie Hancock, but the results are all his own. A real rarity, a “world music” fusion that preserves the aesthetic integrity of all its parts and that isn’t soporific. Rating: Five Stars.

Cover Story

The expulsion of Jews from the IberianPeninsula 500 years ago brought a tragic end to a Jewish presencethat had thrived for centuries in Sepharad, the Hebrew word forSpain. It also set in motion the dispersion of Sephardicculture.

Strictly speaking, Sephardic Jewry includes thecommunities that fanned out across North Africa, Italy, Turkey, theMideast and Greece after the expulsion. But in today’s colloquialsense, the word Sephardic has come to include most non-Ashkenazim.Jews from countries such as Iraq, Iran and Yemen, whose communitiesoriginate with the First and Second Temple exiles, never sojourned inSpain or Portugal, but are generally included within the broaddefinition of Sephardim. In Israel, these Jews are known as Mizrachi,usually translated as Middle Eastern or Oriental.

Sephardic and Mizrachi Jews hold fast tocustoms, food, music, liturgical style and Hebrew pronunciation,which are distinct from the Ashkenazi community. Within Sephardicsubcommunities, traditions vary widely, depending on where theculture evolved. That diversity is reflected in Los Angeles, home toan estimated 100,000 Sephardic and Mizrachi Jews.

This listing is just a partial menu of theorganizations that constitute Los Angeles’ Sephardic communities.They will be featured and celebrated at the Skirball Cultural Center,beginning with a festival this Sunday (see article) and continuingthroughout the month. The array of synagogues, restaurants andschools listed here testify to the rich history and colorfultraditions that characterize Sephardic Judaism. — Julie GruenbaumFax, ReligionEditor

From left, sculpture by Claudie LaToussier Oliver,Oudist John Bilezikjian and Mezzo-soprano Isabelle Ganz will be atthe Sephardic Arts Festival . Below, Detail from “Purim” by NessimSibony, one of the Sephardic Festival artists.

Sephardic Guide to

Los Angeles

By Naomi Pfefferman,

Entertainment Writer


Ivri-NASAWI (National Association of SephardicArtists, Writers and Intellectuals): Amulticultural group that emphasizes Sephardic and Mizrachi arts andhumanities, and produces a quarterly newsletter, salons, festivals,concerts, symposia and a National Sephardic Literary Contest. 1033 N.Orlando Ave., Los Angeles, CA 90069. (323) 650-3157.

The Society for Crypto-JudaicStudies: With an annual conference andquarterly newsletter, the society gathers and exchanges informationabout “Crypto-Jews,” those descended from Jews who were forced toconvert to Catholicism in 15th-century Spain and Portugal. 333Washington Blvd., No. 336, Marina del Rey, CA 90292. (310)821-5141.

Sephardic Educational Center: Founded as the first worldwide Sephardic center in 1979,the SEC has 16 active chapters from Buenos Aires to Los Angeles,where you’ll find Shabbatons, popular singles “Classes for theMasses” and more. Some 16,000 youths have attended the SEC’s programsin Jerusalem, where an accredited, one-year university program inSephardic studies will begin next year. SEC also publishes aquarterly newsletter, Hamerkaz. 10808 Santa Monica Blvd., LosAngeles, CA 90025. (310) 441-9361.

Sephardic Women’s Division of the United JewishFund: The some 40 active participantsraised $110,000 in 1997 for the UJF. 5700 Wilshire Blvd., No. 2815,Los Angeles, CA 90036. For information, call Florence Klatzko (323)761-8312.

Maurice Amado Foundation: Established in 1961 by a Sephardic Jew who emigrated fromTurkey to the United States in 1903, the foundation perpetuatesSephardic heritage and culture by financially supporting Sephardicactivities, institutions, educational programs and events — such asthis year’s Sephardic Arts Festival at the Skirball Cultural Center.1801 Avenue of the Stars, No. 942, Los Angeles, CA 90067. (800)295-4950.

The Hyman Jebb Levy Foundation: Supports a scholarship fund and a wide variety ofSephardic organizations in Los Angeles. (213) 623-6277.

The Los Angeles Sephardic Home for the Aging(LASHA): A support group of the JewishHome for the Aging, LASHA also has outreach programs that linkSephardic Jews to the Home’s some 35 Sephardic residents. Lashon isthe group’s bimonthly newspaper. 7150 Tampa Ave., Reseda, CA 91335.(818) 774-3330.


Sephardic Temple TiferethIsrael: Founded some 75 years ago byTurkish immigrants, Los Angeles’ largest full-service Sephardictemple and only Ladino-speaking congregation now serves 800 families.The shul also has a 110-student religious school, an upcomingSephardic museum and two Ladino-rich libraries. Rabbi DanielBouskila. 10500 Wilshire Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90024. (310)475-7311.

Kahal Joseph SephardicCongregation: Perhaps the only synagogueon the West Coast to worship in the ancient Baghdadi Minhag, KahalJoseph’s 400 families are primarily Iraqi but also include Jews fromSingapore, Indonesia, India and Myanmar. Fifty children attend theHebrew school. Rabbi Hillel Benchimol. 10505 Santa Monica Blvd., LosAngeles, CA 90025. (310) 474-0559.

Em Habanim SephardicCongregation: Moroccan immigrants foundedthis shul in a storefront in 1974; today, the near 400 participantsworship at headquarters in North Hollywood or at satellites inBeverly Hills, West Hills or Cal State Northridge Hillel. A $1.2million, 8,000-square-foot community center is under constructionnext door to the main shul, where Haim Louk, a renowned Andalusianmusic virtuoso, is the cantor and rabbi. 5850 Laurel Canyon Blvd.,North Hollywood, CA 91607. (818) 762-7779. Rabbi Moshe Benzaquenheads the West Coast Torah Center/Em Habanim of Beverly Hills, 415 N.Crescent Dr., Beverly Hills, CA 90210. (310) 474-6508.

Torah Ohr:Specializing in outreach, this Sephardic Orthodox shul draws some 200participants with four daily Judaica classes and lectures on line.Rabbi Eliyahu Kin. 7200 Beverly Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90036. (213)939-6763 or (323) 933-3111.

Hashalom Congregation: A new Orthodox shul with a kabbalistic slant. Rabbi HagayBasri. 1010 S. Robertson Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90035. (310)652-9014.

Beth Midrash Mishkan Israel: Some 100 families, led by a Moroccan-born rabbi,participate in weekly Torah classes, a Talmud-Torah and Shabbatservices. Rabbi Samuel Ohana. 13312 Burbank Blvd., Sherman Oaks, CA91401. (818) 901-1598.

Magen David Congregation: Originally founded by Syrian Jews, the shul, which tracesits minhagim to Alepo, Syria, hosts daily minyans and some 150Shabbat worshippers. 322 N. Foothill Dr., Beverly Hills, CA 90210.(310) 285-9957.

Adat Yeshurun Valley SephardicCongregation: Composed of Jews from NorthAfrica, the shul follows the Moroccan minhag; welcomes 100 Shabbatworshipers; offers mikvah services for men and women; and recentlybought property to create a day school. 12405 Sylvan St., NorthHollywood, CA 91606. (818) 766-4682.

Minyan Yaniv Moshe:Founded in the memory of two young Sephardic Jews, Yaniv Sidis andYosef Hami, the shul is now looking for a new place to congregate.(310) 273-5731.

Pinto Torah Center:An outreach center for Israelis, Persians, Sephardim and Ashkenazim,the center holds daily services, classes in several languages, andShabbat services for about 100 congregants. The center, one of 10around the world, is run by Rabbi Yaakov Pinto, grandson of thelegendary Rabbi Chaim Pinto, the great kabbalist of Morocco (seearticle). 8660 W. Pico Blvd., Los Angeles. (310) 659-6700.

Yismach Moshe Congregation: 7675 Beverly Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90036. (213)939-2681.


Maimonides Academy:Founded in 1969, this coed Orthodox institution, one of the oldestSephardic schools in Los Angeles, offers secular and religiousstudies that emphasize Sephardic heritage and tradition. 310 N.Huntley Dr., Los Angeles, CA 90048. (310) 659-2456.

The Maurice Amado Chair in Sephardic Studies atUCLA: A professor who teaches andorganizes an annual colloquium (this year’s chair was renowned Ladinoexpert and author Dr. Moshe Lazar). UCLA also has a series of MauriceAmado distinguished lectures in Sephardic studies; a planned visitingchair in Judeo-Persian language and an impressive Sephardiccollection at the university research library.

Book & Record Stores

B’er Moshe: Operatedby the Pinto Torah Center, this Judaic shop offers a variety ofritual objects, music, jewelry and books at discounted prices. 8662W. Pico Blvd., Los Angeles, CA. (310) 659-6700.

Matilda Seror Sisterhood Gift Shop at SephardicTemple Tifereth Israel: Carries assortedSephardic and Ladino-language CDs and books, including Albert M.Passy’s unprecedented English-Ladino dictionary. 10500 WilshireBlvd., Los Angeles, CA 90024. (310) 470-2787.

Hatikvah Music:Sports perhaps the largest collection of Sephardic and Ladino CDs intown, including Jewish music from medieval Spain, Judeo-baroque musicfrom Italy and traditional Yemenite and Jewish Bukharan fare. 436 N.Fairfax Ave., Los Angeles, CA 90036. (323) 655-7083.


Hadar Restaurant:Family-style glatt kosher Chinese, Moroccan and Middle Eastern food.A Chinese-born chef serves up the chow mein while owner-catererYvonne Ohana supervises the Sephardic chow. Sunday-Thursday, 11a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday, 11 a.m. until an hour before Shabbat. 12514Burbank Blvd., North Hollywood, CA 91607. (818) 762-1155.

Golan: Glatt kosherChinese and Moroccan-Israeli-style dishes, including spinach andmushroom bourrekas, spicy fish with tomato-and-pepper sauce, andkubbeh (semolina stuffed with ground beef). 13075 Victory Blvd.,North Hollywood, CA 91606. (818) 763-5344 or 989-5423.

Magic Carpet: Glattkosher Yemenite and Middle Eastern specialties, including Moroccanroast chicken (with saffron, lemon and green olives), marguez(Moroccan spicy sausage) and more. Monday-Thursday, 11 a.m.-10 p.m.;Friday, 11 a.m.-3 p.m.; Sunday, 9 a.m.-10 p.m. 8566 W. Pico Blvd.,Los Angeles, CA 90035. (310) 652-8507.

Nessim’s:Specializes in Moroccan dishes and is the only kosher restaurant intown with a regular sushi bar. Sunday-Thursday, 12 p.m.-3 p.m. and 5p.m.-10 p.m.; Friday, 12-3 p.m. lunch, and Shabbat takeout, 8 a.m. to5 p.m.; Saturday, one hour after sundown until midnight. 8939 W. PicoBlvd., Los Angeles, CA (310) 859-9429.

Classic Restaurant:Glatt kosher Persian-Jewish and Chinese cuisine, from Kung Paochicken to kebabs to ghormeh savizi, a Persian stew. Also providescatering, a banquet center and live Persian music on Wednesday andSaturday evenings. Sunday-Thursday, 11:30 a.m.-11:30 p.m.; Friday,11:30 a.m.-4 p.m.; Saturday, after dusk until 2 a.m. 1422 WestwoodBlvd., Los Angeles, CA 90024. (310) 234-9191

Beverly Hills Cuisine: Glatt kosher Chinese and Persian food, including exoticrices, chicken and shish kebab. 9025 Wilshire Blvd. Beverly Hills, CA90211. (310) 247-1239.

Sharon Restaurant:Glatt kosher Persian restaurant with six or seven eat-in tables, butmostly does catering or takeout. 18608 1/2 Ventura Blvd., Tarzana, CA91356. (818) 344-7473.

Kolah Farangi Kebob and ChineseFood: Glatt kosher kebabs and Chinesecuisine. 9180 W. Pico Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90035. (310)274-4007.

Persian Community

Eretz Cultural Center: One of the largest Iranian-Jewish community centers in LosAngeles, Eretz hosts concerts, films, acculturation programs, Englishclasses, Shabbat services for up to 1,000 people, and more. The EretzAlliance School, a preschool and kindergarten housed in the new $1.6million building next door, will expand to include first-graders anda total of 90 students this fall. The center’s address is 6170 WilburAve., Reseda, CA 91335. (818) 342-9303.

International Judea Foundation (aka SiamakOrganization): With 800 members, thenonprofit group is dedicated to bridging the old culture and the newwith activities such as singles events, a tikkun olam committee, HighHoliday services and a Paradise Judea teen group. A 110- to 140-pageEnglish- and Farsi-language magazine, Chashm Andaaz, published aboutnine times a year, covers everything from politics to parenting.Foundation: 520 S. Sepulveda Blvd., No. 201, Los Angeles, CA 90049.Magazine: P.O. Box 3074, Beverly Hills, CA 90212. (310)471-9427.

Iranian American JewishFederation: An umbrella group that nowincludes 16 California Iranian-Jewish organizations, the Federationalso publishes an 80- to 100-page English and Farsi monthly magazine,Shofar, and hosts Shabbat services at the Wilshire Theater (8440Wilshire Blvd.). 5700 Wilshire Blvd., No. 2510, Los Angeles, CA90036. (323) 761-8945.

Iranian Jewish Senior Center: A nonprofit group that provides Persian-Jewish staff,services, entertainment and food for 20 Iranian residents of theBeverly Hills Guest Home. 1019 S. Wooster St., No. 228, Los Angeles,CA 90035. (310) 289-1026.

The Magbit Foundation: A 3,000-member group that provides interest-free studentloans for Iranian and émigré college students inIsrael. 433 N. Camden Dr., Beverly Hills, CA 90210. (310)273-2233.

Persian Hillel, UCLA: A social, cultural and religious outreach organizationthat helps Iranian students balance their Persian-Jewish and Americanidentities. Coordinator is Bahareh Rinsler. c/o UCLA Hillel, 900Hilgard Ave., Los Angeles, CA 90024. (310) 208-3081.

Iranian B’nei Torah MovementMagazine: Introduces Orthodox Jewry andPersian traditions to assimilated Iranian Jews in America. P.O. Box351476, Los Angeles, CA 90035. (310) 652-2115.

Nessah Educational and CulturalCenter: Provides programs such asimmigration counseling, an afternoon school, social activities andShabbat services for 500. 1537 Franklin St., Santa Monica, CA 90404.(310) 453-2218.

Ohr HaEmet Institute: Houses an Iranian synagogue, an Orthodox girls’ highschool (currently there are 52 students), and plans to open apart-time seminary and a women’s learning center. 1030 S. RobertsonBlvd., Los Angeles, CA 90035. (310) 854-3006.

Center for Iranian Jewish OralHistory: Dedicated to the history ofcontemporary Iranian Jewry, the center sponsors an annual conference,publishes a book a year and is in the process of interviewing some250 diverse Iranians for an audiotape oral history project. c/o HomaSarshar, P.O. Box 2543, Beverly Hills, CA 90213-2543. (310)472-3012.

Torat Hayim Hebrew Academy: The largest Persian-Jewish school in Los Angeles, thisOrthodox academy teaches 320 preschool-through-eighth-grade boys andgirls in English and Hebrew. 1210 S. La Cienega Blvd., Los Angeles,CA 90035. (310) 652-8349.

Ohel Moshe Congregation: 9820 Pico Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90035. (310)652-6593.

Cohen Synagogue:18547 Ventura Blvd., Tarzana, CA. (818) 705-4557.

Torat Hayim Synagogue: 1026 S. Robertson Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90035.

Beth David Congregation: 5554 Reseda Blvd., Tarzana, CA 91356. (818)344-8523.

Orit Arfa and Shahram Siman contributed to thisguide.

Prominent Leaders

Jordan Elgrably, Ivri-NASAWI

The author/journalist, who is halfFrench-Moroccan, grew up in an “American, assimilated, Ashkenaziworld, with the idea that being Jewish was going to be defined byreading I.B. Singer and Saul Bellow…. By my early 20s, I felt Iwasn’t whole.”

Elgrably moved to France and then to his father’sancient family home of Granada, Spain, to “put the fragments backtogether.” In the early 1990s, when he realized that there was nonational organization to promote work by Sephardic artists andintellectuals, he decided to create Ivri-NASAWI. “Our goal is topromote a more universalist view of Judaism, with roots in the East,”he says.

Dr. Jose Nessim, Sephardic EducationalCenter

Two decadesago, the Paraguayan-born gynecologist couldn’t help but notice thatthere wasn’t a single Sephardic center in the Jewish world. Sephardicteen-agers were assimilating and knew little of their rich Jewishpast, he worried. Nessim responded by founding the SephardicEducational Center, which now has 16 active worldwide chapters and acelebrated youth program in Jerusalem. “We aim to educate theSephardic world about their Jewish roots,” he says.

Arthur Benveniste, Society for Crypto-JudaicStudies

A definingmoment for Benveniste came when he first read about the Crypto-Jews,the descendants of those forced to convert to Catholicism in15th-century Spain and Portugal, and who became the first settlers ofNew Spain after fleeing the Inquisition. Today, Benveniste, whosefamily comes from Rhodes, edits the society’s quarterly newsletter,Halapid, which focuses on the descendants of Crypto-Jews now livingfrom Peru to Portugal. “Half of Spanish Jewry was lost in theInquisition and Expulsion, and now we’re finding them again,” saysBenveniste, who is also co-chair of the Los Angeles Sephardic FilmFestival.

Albert M. Passy

An ex-Marine sergeant with Turkish-born parents,Passy grew up speaking Ladino. But when he searched for aLadino-to-English dictionary to help him decipher an old book in1986, he discovered that there wasn’t a single one. So Passy tookmatters into his own hands. He read hundreds of Ladino books; usedSephardic old-timers to help him with words he didn’t understand;perused a Ladino-French dictionary; and, in the early 1990s,published his unprecedented, approximately 300-page “Sephardic FolkDictionary,” which now sits in university libraries and will soon gointo its fourth edition.

Raquel Bensimon

“The moment I came to L.A. from Morocco in 1961, Ibecame involved with Sephardic Temple [Tifereth Israel]. But I foundthat women had little to do there,” says Bensimon, now a temple vicepresident who’s active in an array of Sephardic groups. On Bensimon’surging, in the 1970s, women earned the right to vote on templematters. Immediately thereafter, Bensimon became the first woman toserve on the synagogue board and, a year later, the first to serve onthe executive board. Over the years, fund raising to build thecurrent Westwood temple site has been her special passion. “I feelthere’s a little piece of me in every stone,” she says.

Dr. Lev Hakak, UCLA

Professor Hakak, coordinator of Jewish studies atUCLA’s department of Near Eastern languages and cultures, emigratedfrom Bagdad to Israel in 1951, where his once-wealthy family livedfor several years in tents and shacks. Hakak, who was 6 at the time,chronicles the difficult Iraqi aliyah through the eyes of ayoung protagonist in his first novel, “Strangers Among Brothers”(1977), which was a critical (and controversial) success inIsrael.

He further explores Iraqi and Sephardic life inthree more works of fiction and several scholarly books: For example,”The Image of Sephardic Jews in Modern Hebrew Literature,” whichraised more eyebrows in Israel, explores stereotypes about Sephardim.Hakak also organizes Iraqi cultural events in Los Angeles and edits asemi-annual newsletter, Yosef Hayim, for Iraqi Jews.

Rabbi Jacob Ott

Ott, a pioneering Sephardic leader in Los Angeles,happens to be Ashkenazi. That did not stop him from serving as rabbiof Sephardic Temple Tifereth Israel for 34 years, where he guided,shaped and strengthened what is now one of the most vibrant SephardicJewish communities in the Southland.

Ralph Amado

In 1925, Amado’s Turkish émigrégrandfather, Rafael, was a founder of what would ultimately becomeSephardic Temple Tifereth Israel, perhaps Los Angeles’ largestfull-service Sephardic synagogue. Amado’s uncle, Maurice, created theMaurice Amado Foundation, a prominent benefactor of Sephardicendeavors. Ralph Amado, a commissioner on the Los Angeles MunicipalCourt, continues the family work as a director of the foundation anda past president of the temple. Among other activities andaccomplishments, he’s the recipient of the synagogue’s prestigiousSephardic Heritage Award.

Rabbi Daniel Bouskila, Sephardic TempleTifereth Israel

Bouskila, adescendant of the great Pinto kabbalist-rabbis of Morocco, was just31 when he became senior rabbi at Sephardic Temple Tifereth Israel.Today, he has brought a significant number of young families back tothe shul, and apreschool is in the works. “My dream is to create a SephardicBeit Midrash atthe temple,” he says.

Rebecca Amato Levy

The matriarch and backbone of the Jewish communityfrom the Island of Rhodes, Levy preserves the Sephardic legacy bothscholarly and deliciously. She is famous for her recipes andpreparation of Jewish foods from Rhodes. And in her widely acclaimedbook, “I Remember Rhodes,” she has chronicled with astoundingaccuracy and detail the people, streets, names, places, customs,celebrations and culture of the Jewish community of Rhodes. Today,Levy is a sought-after source of information for culturalanthropologists and Sephardic Jews who want to know about theirhistory.

Songs and Stories at

the Skirball

The Skirball Cultural Center’s Sephardic ArtsFestival is back, bigger and better than ever. More than 4,000 peopleare expected to turn out on July 19 for the second annual festival,which will feature the music, art, food and storytelling of everynon-Ashkenazi group in Los Angeles.

The festival begins with a preview evening on July16, when visitors will experience medieval Judeo-Spanish music, aliterary reading and an exhibit of eight mostly local Sephardicartists.

On Sunday, from 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., park at theSkirball or take a shuttle bus from auxiliary sites; at the museum,you can participate in a Sephardic-object treasure hunt or peruseMoroccan inlay boxes and tapestries at the artisans’ exhibit.

Munch on spinach bourekkas or paella at Zeidler’s restaurant,and entertain the kids with storytelling and artists’ workshops thatfeature henna-handpainting, make-your-own-hamseh and more. In between,catch concerts by Ladino music expert Stephani Valadez; Judeo-Spanishsongs by mezzo-soprano Isabelle Ganz; or the eight-piece MiddleEastern ensemble, Za’atar.

The Sephardic event has become the largest annualfestival at the Skirball, says program director Dr. Robert Kirschner.”We aim to reach all the diverse communities of Los Angeles,” hesays, “and the place to begin a pluralistic vision [of L.A.] is witha pluralistic vision of the Jewish people.”

Admission is $8 for adults and free forchildren. Advance tickets are strongly recommended. Call (213)660-8587. –Naomi Pfefferman

Above, eight-piece Middle Eastern ensemble Za’atar, who willperform at the Sephardic Arts Festival July 19. Below, participantsin last year’s festival. The Sephardic event has become the largestannual festival at the Skirball. Included will be artwork, aboveleft. Photo below by Peter Halmagyi.

A Traditional Meeting Place

It all begins on a Friday around sundown. You, theparticipant, are assigned to a family’s house. Perhaps you arrive attheir doorstep, or maybe you meet them at Aish HaTorah’s KabbalatShabbat services at Pico Boulevard and Doheny Drive and walk homewith them afterward.

At the dinner table, your hosts guide you and anintimate gathering of singles through a series of Shabbat customs –singing “Shalom Alechem”; saying the “Kiddush” (wine blessing); andwashing for “Hamotzeh” (bread blessing). Introductions are madearound the table. Those in attendance reflect back on the past weekand offer a highlight for which they are grateful.

Following the meal, your hosts lead a discussionof the week’s Torah portion. More songs are sung. By 9:30 p.m., yourparty returns to Aish’s shul, where a guest speaker — such as pastspeakers Rabbi Nachum Braverman and David Sax, executive producer of”Third Rock from the Sun” — talks about relationships to a roomfulof young singles. Afterward, everybody spills into the adjacentsocial hall and kibitzes late into the night over a selection ofbeverages and finger foods.

What’s going on here?

You have just been through the Bart Stern ShabbosExperience.

The goal is “to introduce young adults to aShabbos experience and expose them to an open and loving and caringcommunity,” says program founder David Nisenbaum, 36.

The namesake of this Aish HaTorah-sponsored affair– a survivor who emerged from the Holocaust an observant Jew — wasregarded as a tzadik (a “righteous individual”) by the Pico-Robertsoncommunity.

“Bart Stern went out of his way to performmitzvahs,” says Nisenbaum. “We started the program about a monthafter his passing.”

The program itself had its genesis in anotherpopular local singles event.

“I really conceived this program from hostingMakor,” says Nisenbaum. What separates the Bart Stern ShabbosExperience from Makor is the Shabbat meal, which takes place at thehome of an observant family, as opposed to single peers.

Many of them point out that the organization’sm.o. is to lead people with little Jewish background into anincreasingly more Orthodox lifestyle, without exposing them to thevarieties of Judaic experience. But for a simple night out, BartStern provides good food and company.

Controversy has not diminished the popularity of agrass-roots network such as Bart Stern. On a typical night, anywherebetween 150 and 180 people spend Shabbat at 30 homes throughout thecommunity. And there is always a demand for more participants –hosts and guests alike.

As with any newer program, Bart Stern hasexperienced its growing pains. A recent blow was the Jan. 27 death oftelevision producer Leibel Rudolph (“Roots,” “Rich Man, Poor Man”).As Nisenbaum puts it, Rudolph was “a driving force behind launchingthe program…. When you went to Leibel’s table, he could read anyperson and make them feel special.” It was not uncommon for Rudolphto extend himself to people interested in strengthening their Jewishidentity. He even facilitated trips for people to learn inIsrael.

Presently, Nisenbaum has taken up the reins again,running the program with Tali Rosenthal. In the works for next monthis the Leibel Rudolph Discovery Experience, a Shabbaton weekend thatwill feature seminars on the Torah and Judaism.

When pressed for specific highlights of past BartStern events, Nisenbaum opts for an overview: “Our highlight is thegrowth of the community as a result of the program. The unity itbrings…. The warmth and love of what being Jewish is allabout.”

To participate in the Bart Stern ShabbosExperience, call Aish HaTorah’s 24-hour phone line — (310) 278-8672.Leave your name, address, phone, sex and age on the answeringmachine, and you will be contacted.