June 24, 2009

When rabbis meet individually with students and their families as the bar or bat mitzvah date approaches, it gives them a chance to deepen the relationship outside of the weekly classes and Shabbat services. For many rabbis, these conversations are key to personalizing the bar/bat mitzvah and help shape the message they give during the service.

Planning a bar or bat mitzvah can be stressful enough, but add difficult economic times and it can be a downright frightening and challenging time emotionally. Let’s face it — communicating with a teenager is not easy in the first place, but add high expectations for their big day and it may be nearly imposs

“Rabbi, my parents and siblings have never been to a Jewish service before. I don’t want them to be uncomfortable at Darci’s bat mitzvah. What should I do?”

Attending a bar/bat mitzvah can be confusing, and perhaps even daunting, especially for guests who aren’t Jewish.

If you’ve chosen non-kosher catering for the bar or bat mitzvah, you may still wish to accommodate guests who observe Jewish dietary laws. But with standards of kashrut observance varying from person to person, meeting everyone’s needs can get tricky.

Given the negative press about over-the-top b’nai mitzvah celebrations, many families are rethinking the black-tie or other extravaganza, giving preference to true expressions of mitzvot.