fbpx

November 13, 2008

Wild about Diamond

David Wild wants you to know that he is an unabashed Neil Diamond fan. So much so that he has written a book titled, “He Is … I Say: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Neil Diamond” (Da Capo Press) that is less biography, according to Wild, than “tribute album.” Being a Diamond fan (dare we call him a Diamond head?) is as much a part of Wild as, well … being Jewish.

Wild grew up in Tenafly, N.J., not even knowing anti-Semitism existed, he said, “because it took a few years before I knew there were non-Jews.” It was at Loomis-Chafee prep school that he discovered, as he put it, that “there’s no Hank Greenberg in lacrosse.”

Early on, Wild developed a passion for music. He was a music critic for his middle school and high school papers, as well at Cornell University’s Daily Sun. A college friendship with one of his teachers, Pulitzer Prize-winning novelist William Kennedy, led to a job at Esquire magazine. Wild recalls: “I didn’t even go to graduation. I went right from my last class with Kennedy … to editing a story by him.”

From Esquire, Wild proceeded to music mecca Rolling Stone. According to Wild, the magazine’s co-founder, Jann Wenner, took a liking to his Jewish jokes. Over the years, Wild interviewed many of his heroes, including Diamond and three of the four Beatles. It’s hard to beat hanging out with Paul McCartney in Buenos Aires on a South American tour (Wild confided that on another occasion, Linda McCartney pulled him aside and told him to marry the woman he was dating — which he did).

At Rolling Stone, Wild rose to music editor and then started to write about TV, where he discovered he could be funnier and “more of a wiseass.”

He also started to appear on VH-1 in its “Behind the Music” shows and was asked to produce one about Diamond, which Wild refers to as “the only scandal-free episode of ‘Behind the Music.'” In the process, Wild discovered an ability to write TV specials (and more specifically to write for others, quickly), therby launching a successful career writing TV specials and awards shows.

On the Internet’s IMDB database, Wild has credits for writing 63 shows, including several years of the Grammys, The Teen Music, TV Land and Country Music awards. Among the shows he is proudest of are “The Tribute to Heroes,” following Sept. 11, “Live 8” and, of course, the aforementioned “Behind the Music” Diamond program.

So why Neil Diamond?

Diamond is the New York-native, Jewish singer-songwriter born in 1941, sometimes called “The Jewish Elvis.” He was discovered by Ellie Greenwich and Jeff Barry and signed to Atlantic Records’ Bang Label, where he recorded “Solitary Man” and “Cherry, Cherry”; wrote hits for the Monkees TV show, including “I’m a Believer” (or “The Shrek” song as my daughter refers to it); and many more hits, including “Holly, Holy,” “Sweet Caroline,” “Song Sung Blue,” “Red, Red Wine,” “Cracklin’ Rosie” and “Girl, You’ll Be a Woman Soon.”

He also starred in a hard-to-watch remake of “The Jazz Singer”; has sold more than 125 million records, with 36 Top 40 hits; and played thousands of sold-out concerts the world over. Diamond’s most recent album, “Home Before Dark,” entered the charts at No. 1 for the first time in his career.

Now, a confession: I am not a Diamond fan. I like many of his songs when I hear them on the radio, but I don’t buy his records or attend his concerts.

When I think of Diamond, I think of Al Jolson, known as the world’s greatest entertainer and, not coincidentally, the original Jazz Singer. For me, there is something about Diamond that, like Jolson, seems too earnest, too on the nose. A little schmaltzy even. I respect Diamond as a songwriter and acknowledge his appeal as a performer, but he doesn’t do it for me.

Wild, of course, has thought long and hard about Diamond and why not everyone shares his fervor. Wild believes that the areas where many detractors find fault are actually Diamond’s strengths.

ALTTEXTWild also believes there is a generation that has grown up with irony as part of its cultural DNA, and Diamond is resolutely “unironic.” Further, Wild says, “He is the son of a people who owned a store. More than most artists, he’s been driven by keeping the customer satisfied.” This, too, is not “cool.”

Finally, Wild wants to put forward a theory that among some who don’t get Diamond’s appeal, he suspects another source: “In my heart of hearts, a considerable amount of the people who are skeptical or undervalue him are people who are uncomfortable with their own Judaism.”

To which I respond, much as Larry David did in an episode of “Curb Your Enthusiasm”: Jewish? Yes. Self-loathing? Definitely. But Jewish self-loathing? No way.

Still, I get his point.

As Jackie Mason is wont to remind us, “Too Jewish” is an expression used most often by Jews. Perhaps Diamond is the Ralph Lauren of music — a success by everyone’s standards, except those who fault him for having been born Ralph Lifshitz.

Wild’s paean to Diamond is intended as a “generational apology” from the age of irony to the generation of Jewish men like Wild’s father, whom he thinks we tend to undervalue. At the same time, Wild’s desire to write his tribute to Diamond was born from a desire to express something about himself.

In the book, Wild writes that he was at prep school when he first worried about admitting his love for Diamond. I pointed out the obvious parallel that coming out as a Diamond fan among his peers is akin to coming out as a Jew among his WASPy prep schoolmates.

“It is so true,” Wild said, “If he [Diamond] didn’t exist, he would be a wonderful metaphor for being Jewish.”

So consider Wild’s book-length tribute album to Diamond to be the author’s own “Song Sung Blue.”

Or, perhaps, his “Song Sung Jew.”

David Wild will read from and sign copies of his book “He Is .. I Say” at 7 p.m. on Nov. 19th at Book Soup, 8818 Sunset Blvd., West Hollywood. (310) 659-3110

Wild about Diamond Read More »

Briefs: Secular candidate new Jerusalem mayor, Netanyahu would nix talks

Poll Shows Barkat Winning Jerusalem Mayoralty

Secular businessman Nir Barkat appeared to be the new mayor of Jerusalem, according to exit polls.

Channel 1 TV showed Barkat with 50 percent of the vote Tuesday to 42 percent for Rabbi Meir Porush, an ultra-Orthodox Knesset member. The third contender, former Russian oligarch Arcadi Gaydamak, was well behind.

Early exit polling, however, has proved to be unreliable in the past.

Many Jerusalemites view this year’s municipal elections to replace the current mayor, Uri Lupolianski, as a turning point for a city that is Israel’s poorest, still vulnerable to terrorist attacks and wracked by economic, political and religious divisions. Still, turnout was low, the Jerusalem Post reported.

Lupolianski was the city’s first Charedi, or ultra-Orthodox, mayor.

Netanyahu Would Halt Annapolis-Launched Talks

Benjamin Netanyahu would end Israel’s current negotiations with the Palestinians if elected prime minister, his office said.

A spokeswoman for Netanyahu, the Likud Party candidate for prime minister in elections scheduled for Feb. 10, said Netanyahu believes the Israeli-Palestinian peace talks launched a year ago at a peace summit at Annapolis, Md., have failed, The Associated Press reported.

“It’s premature to talk about a final peace deal, and sharing control of Jerusalem is out of the question,” Netanyahu spokeswoman Dina Libster said, adding that the Likud leader believes talks with the Palestinians should focus on economic issues.

On Monday, the AP reported that Netanyahu said he would continue Israeli-Palestinian peace talks but that negotiating over Jerusalem was out of the question.

Biden, Livni Discuss Iran, Peace

Joe Biden discussed Middle East peace and Iran in a phone call with Tzipi Livni.

The U.S. vice president-elect spoke to the Israeli foreign minister after last week’s elections, said a statement released Tuesday by Livni’s office.

Biden, a senator from Delaware for 35 years, is expected to take a lead foreign policy role in the Barack Obama administration. He is well known to Israeli leaders, having made his first visit to the region just before the 1973 Yom Kippur War.

“Livni thanked Vice President-elect Biden for his long-standing friendship and support of Israel and said that she looks forward to continuing to work with him,” the statement said. “They agreed to work together to advance the shared interests and values of Israel and the United States in the Middle East.”

The statement emphasized concerns about Iran’s suspected nuclear weapons program and control of the Gaza Strip by Hamas terrorists.

“It is very important that we continue our cooperation and work together against the Iranian threat,” it quoted Livni as saying. “Time is not working in favor of the moderates in Iran. Hamas and the extremist elements are studying our moves and they must understand that the world will not tolerate extremism and terror.”

Livni is leading the centrist Kadima Party in Feb. 10 elections.

Enriched Uranium Reportedly Found in Syria

Investigators from the International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA) reportedly found traces of enriched uranium in Syria.

The finding by the agency, which works under the auspices of the United Nations, is a potential sign that Syria had been attempting to develop a nuclear program, Reuters quoted diplomats familiar with the IAEA probe as saying.

According to Monday’s report, the uranium was discovered at the same site that was allegedly bombed by the Israeli Air Force in September 2007.

The leaked information came shortly after the IAEA Director Mohammed El Baradei announced he would release a formal, written report on the subject, Reuters reported. The IAEA had no immediate comment.

“It isn’t enough to conclude or prove what the Syrians were doing, but the IAEA has concluded this requires further investigation,” a diplomat with ties to the organization said.

Birthright Cuts Budget by $35 Million

Birthright Israel is cutting its budget by $35 million for 2009.

Birthright, which sends Jews between the ages of 18 and 26 on free 10-day trips to Israel, had a budget of $110 million in the fiscal year that just ended, enabling the organization to send some 42,000 people to Israel. In the coming year, Birthright will only be able to send 25,000 because the program’s budget is dropping to $75 million, the president and CEO of the Birthright Foundation, Jay Golan, told JTA.

Golan, however, said that Birthright will most likely not be affected by the financial troubles of the company of its largest private benefactor, Sheldon Adelson’s Las Vegas Sands company. The casino company is on the verge of bankruptcy, according to Bloomberg News.

Adelson gave some $60 million to Birthright Israel in 2006 and 2007. In 2008, he pledged $30 million to the organization to be paid out over the next two years. The money will pay for 6,000 trips, Golan said.

Briefs courtesy of Jewish Telegraphic Agency.

Briefs: Secular candidate new Jerusalem mayor, Netanyahu would nix talks Read More »

Planets discovered outside the Solar System

Astronomers today announced they had found planets orbiting a distant star, which is not visible at the center of the dust ring in this photo. Via The New York Times:

In what might amount to an early Christmas present to the universe, two groups of astronomers have taken the first pictures of what they say — and other astronomers agree — are probably planets going around other stars.

The achievement, the result of years of effort on improved observational techniques and better data analysis, presages more such discoveries, the experts said, and will open the door to new investigations and discoveries of what planets are and how they came to be formed.

“It’s the tip of iceberg. Now that we know they are there, there is going to be an explosion,” said Christian Marois of the Herzberg Institute of Astrophysics in Victoria, British Columbia. Dr. Marois is the leader of a team that recorded three planets circling a star — known as HR 8799 — 130 light-years away in the constellation Pegasus.

The other team, led by Paul Kalas of the University of California, Berkeley, found a planet orbiting the star Fomalhaut, only 25 light-years from Earth, in the constellation Piscis Austrinus. In an interview by e-mail, Dr. Kalas said that when he finally confirmed his discovery last May, “I nearly had a heart attack.”

In scratchy telescope pictures released to the world Thursday in Science Express, the online version of the journal Science, the new planets appear as fuzzy dots that move slightly around their star from exposure to exposure. Astronomers who have seen the new images agreed that these look like the real thing.

“I think Kepler himself would recognize these as planets orbiting a star following his laws of orbital motion,” Mark S. Marley, of NASA’s Ames Research Center in Mountain View, Calif., wrote in an e-mail message elaborating on HR 8799.

Planets discovered outside the Solar System Read More »

Annie Leibovitz, Ed Asner, Shelly Berman, Lainie Kazan and Elliot Gould

SAT | NOVEMBER 15

(AUTHOR READING)
Jack and Robin Firestone, an average American Jewish couple, were vacationing in Paris in 1997. Then tragedy struck — right before their eyes, a car carrying Princess Diana fatally crashed in a Paris tunnel. The Firestones have since written a book, “Chasing Diana,” about their tumultuous experience and their role in the ensuing investigation. “You never want to believe it was anything more than an accident, but the more we saw, we could not help believe that there’s something deeper here,” Robin said. “The inquest, the verdict, the book; it’s all closure for us. Now we’ll just let the reader decide.” Sat. 7 p.m. Free. Book Soup, 8818 Sunset Blvd., West Hollywood. (310) 659-3110. ” target=”_blank”>http://www.belairfilmfestival.com.

(FUNDRAISING GALA)
You can lend a hand in the fight against cancer by playing a hand at the eighth annual Visions Israel Cancer Research Fund’s Monte Carlo Night. Dressed in chic evening attire, you can dance, bid on auction goodies, roll the dice in craps, take a chance on roulette and don your poker face in Texas Hold’em while feeling good that your money is going to the best hospitals, universities and cancer research institutions in Israel. Visions, the ambitious “next generation” of charitable organizations, will honor Rachael Tanenbaum and Benjamin Sternberg with its “Visionary of the Year Awards.” Sat. 8 p.m. $80 (before Nov. 14 at noon), $95 (thereafter). Petersen Automotive Museum, 6060 Wilshire Blvd., Los Angeles. (323) 651-1200. ” target=”_blank”>http://www.westsidejcc.org.

SUN | NOVEMBER 16

(CONFERENCE)
Sephardi and Mizrachi Jews are a minority within a minority. The largely understudied cultures of Jews from Iraq, Syria, Georgia, Iran, Morocco and other Arab countries are the focus of an academic-minded conference, “Integrating Sephardi and Mizrachi Studies, Research and Practice,” co-sponsored by Hebrew ” target=”_blank”>http://www.huc.edu/sephardic/conference.

(ART)
Going Metro is becoming all the rage in our eternally traffic-jammed city. Even ATID is hopping on the bandwagon with its Outdoors Metro Rail Art Tour — a sightseeing trip that takes you below ground to view the eclectic artwork in and around the Metro Rail system in Los Angeles. Knowledgeable guides will point out the works, tell you about the artists and provide insight into the communities they beautify. The tour, beginning at the Union Station Metro stop, will also provide a chance to try out the city’s burgeoning public transportation system — it ain’t New York, but it’s a start! Sun. 10:45 a.m. Free (members), $8 (guests). Metro Station at Historic Union Station, 900 Alameda St., Los Angeles. ” target=”_blank”>http://www.aabgu.org.

(THEATER)
The West Coast Jewish Theatre invites you to “An Evening of Stars!” The benefit show, starring Jewish theater favorites Ed Asner, Shelley Berman, Hal Linden and others, will enable the organization to continue producing quality theater that presents Jewish themes, traditions and ideas. Famous former host of “Let’s Make a Deal,” Monty Hall, will be the master of ceremonies at this grand evening of entertainment. Sun. 6:30 p.m. $150-$225. American Jewish University, Gindi Auditorium, 15600 Mulholland Drive, Bel Air. (323) 650-6973. ” border = 0 vspace = ‘8’ hspace = ‘8’ align = ‘left’>relationship with the courageous German businessman who saved the lives of hundreds of Jews, at “Little Leyson — The Youngest Schindler’s List Survivor Tells His Story.” Mon. 8 p.m. $15-$20. Hyatt Westlake Plaza Hotel, 880 S. Westlake Blvd., Westlake Village. (818) 991-0991. ” target=”_blank”>http://www.skirball.org.

WED | NOVEMBER 19

(ART)
Painting and poetry meld together beautifully in Marcia Falk’s new exhibition, “Inner East: Illuminated Poetry and Blessings.” Falk, author of “The Song of Songs: Love Lyrics from the Bible” and “The Book of Blessings: New Jewish ” target=”_blank”>http://www.uclahillel.org.

THU | NOVEMBER 20

(COMEDY)
“M*A*S*H” and “Ocean’s Eleven” star Elliot Gould will be honored at the Laugh Factory during a special night for Hillel 818. The comedy-filled evening will feature Elon Gold, Bret Ernst and The Skylar Brothers. Proceeds from the event will help support Hillel programs at Cal State Northridge, and Pierce and Valley colleges. Thu. 7 p.m. (VIP reception) 8 p.m. (show) $10-$25; $75 (VIP). The Laugh Factory, 8001 Sunset Blvd., Los Angeles. (818) 887-5901 or (818) 886-5101. ” target=”_blank”>http://www.jmcla.org.

(POLITICS)
What can the Jewish community expect from our next president? Congregation Ner Tamid of South Bay will host Jonathan Adelman, a professor at University of Denver’s Joseph Korbel School of International Studies and author of “The Rise of Israel: A History of a Revolutionary State,” for a special Shabbat service that will address this and many other questions. Adelman will speak on “What Does Our New President Mean for Israel and the Middle East?” If you’re not already impressed with Adelman’s credentials, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice can vouch for him: She was his former doctoral student. Fri. 6:15 p.m. Free. Congregation Ner Tamid, 5721 Crestridge Road, Rancho Palos Verdes. (310) 377-6986. Annie Leibovitz, Ed Asner, Shelly Berman, Lainie Kazan and Elliot Gould Read More »

So you want to be a DJ . . .

You’ve danced your last on the bar or bat mitzvah circuit and moved on to high school. But that doesn’t mean the party has to end.

For those who have dreamed of going from an infinite iPod playlist to playing live on the ones and twos, the bar and bat mitzvah party scene is a great place to get your start. Setting up a DJ business takes practice, planning and professionalism, but it beats baby-sitting and burgers.

The Journal turned to two local experts to help you get started: DJ Elan Feldman of Elan Entertainment, a 21-year-old economics major at Claremont McKenna College, and DJ Chris Dalton of C.D. Players Entertainment, a 36-year-old entrepreneur who began his career as a teen talk show host in Detroit.

Starting Out

It might seem like a daunting task to turn a hobby you like into a lucrative business, but both DJs say it isn’t that hard.

“There are some formalities, like creating business cards, buying insurance and buying equipment,” Feldman said. “But the hardest part of starting a DJ company is finding a market. DJing is one of those businesses that a hobby can be a real business, too.”

Start by asking your parents to help you buy a DJ system as an investment. Spin every opportunity you get, even if it’s just to perform for friends at their events for no cost. Practice makes perfect, and if you do a good job, word of mouth goes a long way for these events.

Getting Hired

Referrals do wonders. If you have already worked one bar or bat mitzvah party, chances are the parents know other parents from the Hebrew school who need to hire someone to DJ their child’s event.

“All of my business involves referrals,” Dalton said. “I don’t spend anything on advertising. One time, I put an ad in the Yellow Pages, and it almost put me under.”

Having your own Web site or establishing a presence on Facebook or MySpace doesn’t hurt, especially if the student is doing the research. But parents don’t necessarily turn to a Web site for information about hiring a DJ for their child’s special day.

More important is a professional-looking business card. You can expect to spend about $65 for a box of 1,000 cards if you order them through a designer or retailer. But it’s also possible to get print-it-yourself packages from office supply stores for about $15.

Be sure you bring cards and any other marketing materials to the event. If the adults like what you do, there’s a chance they will pass your card on to someone else and get your name out.

Equipment

Feldman prefers Apple products, saying that he’s found them to be the best and easiest to use.

“I have several DJ programs; the most popular right now is Traktor,” he said. “I like to use an iPod, because I feel more involved with the party when I’m not hiding behind a DJ booth.”

Dalton brings a DJ rig with him that uses dual CD players, much like a vinyl turntable. He uses a tracker scratch with a laptop and will even break out an iPod as a backup to make sure those special moments go without a hitch.

For speakers, Dalton swears by Mackies and JBLs, which he considers to be the most dependable available. He also prefers American Audio mixers, which he says last up to three years.

Cost

Some DJs say shelling out a few hundred dollars a year for insurance purposes is worth the expense, while others say it isn’t necessary. Those who do carry insurance say it provides venues and clients alike with peace of mind.

Most of your expenses will come from investing in new equipment.

“I upgrade my equipment annually,” Dalton said. “It can cost a minimum of $10,000.”

Labor is another a big cost. It’s possible that you will have to pay dancers and assistants based on the size of the party.

And then there’s transportation. You may have to start shelling out for travel expenses, depending on your level of success. Given fluctuating gas prices, consider your transportation costs as part of your price quote.

Rates

Check to see how others in your area structure the rates they charge.

Dalton charges a flat fee of $925 for four hours. But Feldman, on the other hand, doesn’t have a set rate.

“I consider the type of event, its length and the financial situation of the customer before I set my price,” Feldman said.

Generally, if a party lasts longer than four hours, the customer will be paying more for that luxury.

Setup

If there are issues with the synagogue or hall where you need to set up — for example, there isn’t enough room for dancing — go with the flow.

“I teach everyone to give yourself an hour of prep time to make sure everything is OK,” Dalton said. “I work very well with everyone and make sure that everyone working for me understands that we are a team and that there is no ‘I’ in the word ‘team.'”

When dealing with pushy or demanding parents, it is imperative to figure out what they want well before the party starts so you aren’t hit with any last-minute issues. Micromanaging takes the fun out of the event for all parties involved, so before the day of the event, it’s important to come to an agreement on party details (for example, what time the cake comes out, what time dancing starts, if anyone is going to light the candles or give speeches and when, etc.).

Remember to handle parents in a professional manner, because you need their referral.

Playlist

A good DJ must be confident, engage the crowd and never forget that the event is to celebrate someone else’s personal moment, not to showcase his or her ability to entertain.

“Before any party, I meet with the client to discuss and plan the event. All my parties are fully customized. So these meetings serve as an opportunity for the family to tell me exactly what they are looking for and what type of music to play, as well as how the order of events should play out,” Feldman said.

A good DJ should understand his/her audience and keep current with popular music trends. Clean radio edits for certain hip-hop songs don’t hurt, especially because b’nai mitzvah kids often have little brothers and sisters at the party.

A great DJ must be able to guide the party in the right direction based on what the parents and bar or bat mitzvah student want. But then a little musical spontaneity never hurt anyone, and the variety will probably keep partygoers out on the dance floor clamoring for more.

So you want to be a DJ . . . Read More »

Pinched pocketbooks no bar to party planning

Pinched Pocketbooks NoBar to Party Planning

Have tough economic times forced you to scale back your child’s bar or bat mitzvah party plans? With your 401(k) down, is the ice sculpture out? Is your resetting ARM making you reconsider that 18-piece orchestra?

If so, you can still have one of the best bar or bat mitzvah parties ever.

Paul, who lives in the northern Sierras and preferred not to use his last name, was pleased with the modest bar mitzvah party he and his wife hosted last month for their son.

“We had a Kiddush at our little synagogue immediately after the bar mitzvah and a catered dinner for about 75 people at the lodge building at our town’s public park,” he said.

Paul spent about $40 per person, including food and “midrange” wines. After dinner, guests were invited back to the house, including many out-of-town relatives and friends, for more time to visit and socialize. The kids had their own fun, and music was provided via a Bose iPod dock.

This modest party wasn’t prompted as much by economic pressure as it was by being turned off by what Paul and his wife considered “large, garish bar and bat mitzvah parties” they had attended on which “embarrassing” amounts of money were spent.

“We frankly think it is shameful and a violation of both the tenets of Judaism and good taste to throw a huge and lavish bar or bat mitzvah party,” Paul said.

Paul’s hardly alone. When Rob Frankel and his wife planned their daughter’s bat mitzvah, they were so turned off by their synagogue’s onerous rules (including vetting the parents’ speeches) and insistence on using an expensive caterer, that later they did their son’s bar mitzvah totally on their own, from using a “rent-a-rabbi” to teach their son and provide a rental Torah scroll and bimah.

“The whole year’s training and day of service cost less than a year of temple membership dues,” Frankel recalled.

The Frankels also saved money by creating their own save-the-date postcards, invitations, tribute videos and thank-you cards.

Rabbi Steven Leder, senior rabbi of Wilshire Boulevard Temple and author of “More Money Than God,” encourages all parents planning bar and bat mitzvah parties to keep the focus on Judaism and on the child. When he meets with parents, he asks them to make two lists: one of values they consider Jewish and another of values they associate with bar/bat mitzvah parties.

The lists are starkly different. While the Jewish values list often includes sacred music, spirituality and community, the list of values associated with the bar mitzvah parties can include sexuality, gross excess, drinking and narcissism.

Leder has found this exercise very useful.

After discussing the values gap between the bar mitzvah service and the typical bar mitzvah party, “parents feel they have permission to embrace a more child-appropriate event and one with more Jewish content,” he said.

He recommends that a Saturday night party begin with a Havdalah ceremony and that parents should be more discerning about the music played at the event. He also encourages that some money be donated to MAZON-A Jewish Response to Hunger. One creative mom at the synagogue, tired of seeing party favors that went to waste, began doing mitzvah projects at parties, such as having kids make stuffed animals, which are then donated to a children’s hospital.

Leder also keeps parties held at Wilshire Boulevard Temple in line by insisting on no hard liquor, no amplified music outside and no inappropriate décor or themes, such as Halloween.

“We’re trying to avoid glaring contradictions to Jewish values,” he noted. “Besides, kid-friendly parties automatically save money.”

Chai’le Ingber, a Los Angeles-based party planner, says that times are changing when it comes to money and party planning. She acknowledges that while most people able to hire a planner aren’t the ones feeling the pinch as much as some others, she has found lately that some are choosing to scale back, so as not to flaunt their wealth at a time when so many others are hurting or are earmarking some money that would have gone to the party to tzedakah instead.

Ingber recommends that anyone who can host a party at home do so.

“There’s always something so special about a home party, when friends have helped out. Leave out the hall and the band if you can. You’ll cut major expenses, while creating a beautiful, homey event,” she said.

Inger even overheard her daughter, who recently completed her bat mitzvah circuit year, agree with friends that the most fun parties they had attended were home-based, because they were not done to impress adults but were geared to what the girl wanted.

Other ideas to save money include using a school auditorium or nonhotel venue.

“With a little creativity and twist you can transform even plain rooms into a themed room,” Ingber said.

After choosing a theme or colors with your child, inexpensive crafts and flowers can be found in a variety of stores downtown. And paper plates and plastic cutlery can still add color while saving money.

“The truth is, community pressure to create a certain kind of party can be intense, but it’s not the $500 cake that makes the party; it’s the hosts and the child who welcome you into their home or the hall who make it special. If the hosts are stiff and stressed, it’s worthless,” Ingber said.

Aaron Cooper, psychologist and author of “I Just Want My Kids to Be Happy,” hopes that more parents begin to see the upside of financial adversity in the form of valuable lessons learned and resilience developed.

Too many bar and bat mitzvah parties, he notes, have been marked by the worshipful emphasis on the child that colors so much contemporary parenting, yet spirituality and a sense of meaning are two of the ingredients essential for happy lives.

“What do we want the outstanding memory to be when our son or daughter looks back from middle age to their bar or bat mitzvah event? If a pinched pocketbook helps parents re-think this question, it’s the kids who will reap the dividends someday,” he said.

Judy Gruen’s latest book is “The Women’s Daily Irony Supplement.”


Cut Costs, Not the Fun

Want to keep your costs low without alienating your family, friends and fellow congregants? Consider these tips from the proud survivor of a bar mitzvah party.

  • Buy a planner notebook and organize everything yourself, instead of hiring a party planner.
  • Skip the banquet hall and rent a neighborhood or community clubhouse, large room at an activity center or school assembly hall.
  • Cater through your favorite restaurant, instead of using a restaurant or banquet hall that only has package deals or would be more costly. If you get a package deal somewhere, read the fine print: There are invariably all kinds of strange charges, such as corkage fees, cake-cutting fees, charges for valet service and security.
  • Make your own centerpieces, adding a few balloons on top, with confetti sprinkled around the base. Decorate simply — sometimes too much really looks like too much.
  • Design and print your own invitations, RSVP cards and placecards. Today’s online paper businesses and PC applications make this easier and more beautiful than you could have imagined five years ago.
  • If your synagogue allows it, have your friends make the desserts and/or oneg sweets instead of buying them from a bakery. Get all of your beverages — alcoholic and no-alcoholic — on your own from a place like Costco, Trader Joe’s or BevMo.
  • Have your dinner for the out-of-towners in a Chinese or Italian restaurant that serves family-style platters — this cuts way down on the cost of individual meals.
  • Have a luncheon instead of a bar mitzvah dinner because lunch typically costs less. Alternately, forgo one really huge celebration and have two little ones — a casual oneg luncheon and then a kids-only party in the evening.
  • Interview and hire a photographer who will give you the disc with all of your photos, and you can make the album yourself online, with the help of a service like Flickr.com. It’s a very easy process once you learn how. Making the album yourself costs about one-half to one-third of the traditional proofs-and-album route.

— Denise Koek, Contributing Writer

Pinched pocketbooks no bar to party planning Read More »

Sephardic film fest opens with gala at Paramount; Young Iranian Jews

Sephardic Jewish Film Festival Opens With Gala at Paramount Studios

There’s nothing like a red-carpet rollout at Paramount Studios to shift attention from an epic election season to more pressing matters, like Rabbi Daniel Bouskila’s plea to fund and build the world’s first Sephardic rabbinical school in Jerusalem — in just one year.

“Yes we can,” Bouskila said, invoking President-elect Barack Obama’s ubiquitous mantra.

This was his call at the Sephardic Jewish Film Festival’s Opening Gala on Nov. 9, where he was honored with the Maimonides Leadership Award for his 15-year rabbinic legacy at Sephardic Temple Tifereth Israel, a congregation of 800 families.

Nearly 500 people sat in an opulent Paramount movie theater to watch a tribute video, in which Israeli novelist Amos Oz and journalist Yossi Klein Halevi saluted the Sephardic rabbi.

In turn, Bouskila delivered his thanks to the community and especially his wife, Peni. “It takes a lot of strength raising three children — especially when one [of them] is 44,” he joked.

Bouskila also spoke of the irony in being honored at Paramount, which he called his childhood “backyard,” a place where his father once worked as a tailor for Aaron Spelling. He recounted his early dream of becoming an actor, which ended when casting agents told him they were looking for an “all-American boy.”

Perhaps the evening’s other honoree, screenwriter-producer Eli Attie, fits that bill. The Harvard-educated, former White House communications adviser-turned-Hollywood screenwriter was feted with the Cinema Sepharad Award.

Once an assistant in President Bill Clinton’s administration, Attie forayed into Hollywood to write for the critically acclaimed series, “The West Wing,” and is now co-executive producer of the FOX drama, “House, M.D.”

His tribute video featured an Al Gore cameo, in which the former vice president quipped that after the 2000 election, Attie must have been the only Democrat to get a job in the West Wing. The show’s creator, Aaron Sorkin presented Attie with his award and said that hiring Attie was “the single most rewarding decision I’ve made in my career.”

Attie humbly accepted, saying he was “nowhere near deserving” because he did not create the shows he works for and his involvement in the Sephardic community has been “sporadic.” But, he said, “no matter how far you drift, your family and identity never seem to be that far behind you.”

The gala began with all-you-can-eat sushi, open bars and a silent fundraising auction featuring original art, jewelry and designer handbags. It concluded with the screening of the Israeli film, “Three Mothers.”

The six-day festival at the Majestic Crest Theatre in Westwood benefits the Sephardic Educational Center in Jerusalem.

Young Iranian American Jews Gather to Watch Historic Presidential Election

ALTTEXTNearly 200 young, local Iranian Jews from the organization, 30 Years After, gathered at The Parlor sports bar in Santa Monica on Nov. 4 to mingle and watch the results of the presidential election.

While a substantial segment of Southland Iranian Jews were supporting Republican presidential candidate John McCain, some younger members of the community backed Democratic nominee Barack Obama and cheered the announcement of his victory during the night’s television newscasts.

Those in attendance enjoyed drinks while talking politics and the direction of the new Obama administration, vis-à-vis Iran. During the past year, 30 Years After board members have organized various events to increase Iranian Jewish participation in the political process and said they were pleased with the turnout at their election night event.

“Regardless of one’s political affiliation, no one can deny that this election represents a historic moment for our country and reminds us that our democracy is our most treasured asset,” board member Jon Yagoubzadeh said. “By hosting an election-watch event, we wanted to provide our community the opportunity to witness this moment together and to discuss the outcome of the election.”

Other 30 Years After organizers said they were planning post-election informational seminars on the expected directions and policies of the new Obama administration.

— Karmel Melamed, Contributing Writer

Sephardic film fest opens with gala at Paramount; Young Iranian Jews Read More »

Rahm Emanuel is a fighting policy wonk with a Jewish soul

Political insight, killer in a fight, Yiddishkayt — it’s an inseparable package when it comes to Rahm Emanuel, say those who know President-elect Barack Obama’s pick to be the next White House chief of staff.

Since his days as a fundraiser and then a “political adviser” — read: enforcer — for President Bill Clinton, Emanuel has earned notoriety as a no-holds-barred politico. Accept the good with the bad because it’s of a piece, said Steve Rabinowitz, who worked with Emanuel in the Clinton White House.

“He can be a ‘mamzer,’ but he’s our mamzer,” said Rabinowitz, using the Yiddish term for “bastard,” speaking both as a Democrat and a Jew. “Sometimes that’s what you need.”

The apocrypha is legendary, if somewhat hard to pin down: Jabbing a knife into a table screaming “Dead!” as colleagues shout out the names of political enemies, sending a dead fish to a rival, screaming at friends and enemies alike for no good reason.

Even his allies acknowledge that Emanuel, 48, can be on edge at times.

“He’s not running for Miss Congeniality, ever,” said U.S. Rep. Jan Schakowsky (D-Ill.), who has known Emanuel since they worked at Illinois Public Action, a public interest group, in the early 1980s. “He is relentless; he doesn’t give up, but in a strategic way. He’s good at figuring out other people’s self-interest and negotiating in a way that comes out in his favor.”

Emanuel, an Illinois congressman who boasts strong ties to his local Jewish community and the Jewish state, also can be seen as embodying Obama’s stated commitment to Israeli security and diplomacy: During the first Iraq War, Emanuel flew to Israel as a volunteer to help maintain military vehicles. Two years later, he was an aide to Clinton, helping to push along the newly launched Oslo process.

Rahm Emanuel is a fighting policy wonk with a Jewish soul Read More »

Begone, bygones! Green is the new blue and white

Bygones

Let Bygones (Not) Be Bygones” (Nov. 7) infuriated me. Marty Kaplan is not happy that Barack Obama was generous to his opponents and their supporters in his victory speech, because in his opinion, they are guilty of lies and character assassination for suggesting the possibility that a Chicago politician who associated with the likes of the Rev. Wright and Bill Ayers to launch his political career might not be trusted to always put the best interests of his country above his own political ambitions or the best interests of his political party.

I have never read a more mean-spirited opinion piece, and I urge The Journal to stop printing such garbage.

Steven Novom
Tarzana

The Republicans have smeared many American citizens and disrespected us as human beings, called us traitors, called us un-American, made the word “liberal” into a mocked, disrespectful term, etc.

And many of us would like some accountability. Especially of the kind that lies us into wars and gets our kids killed. Because I am not just going to “get over it.”

How do we get it? What can we do to make sure that happens, because I am behind that campaign?

Bill Davis
Secretary, Democrats Abroad
Melbourne, Australia

Marty Kaplan so eloquently expressed my own disdain for the politics of personal destruction practiced by John McCain and his campaign. We as Jews know only too well that words count and that there are people who can be whipped into committing dangerous acts when encouraged by a leader they respect.

I once had enormous regard for McCain, but it will take me a long time to forgive him after he condoned — expressly or tacitly — the ugly accusations against an honorable opponent. We can’t allow this to be excused as politics as usual. It is unacceptable, dangerous and profoundly un-American. Enough is enough!

Barbara H. Bergen
Los Angeles

It seems a bit disingenuous when Marty Kaplan writes, “Along with the privilege of living in a democracy comes the obligation to be accountable for your actions,” right after making so many unsupported accusations against John McCain, Sarah Palin, Rudy Giuliani and President Bush.

The one quote he does supply is from McCain’s concession speech: “I urge all Americans who supported me to join me in not just congratulating him [Obama] but offering our next president our good will and earnest effort to find ways to come together,” which surely supports the idea that McCain is indeed a class act.

Kenny Laitin
via e-mail

New Jewish Agenda

You could not be more right when you said green is the new blue and white (“A New Jewish Agenda,” Nov. 7). Our community has been slow to grasp this. AIPAC has been slow to grasp it in a meaningful way. There is a sentence or two in its annual policy document but not much by way of content in the annual conference.

The League of Conservation Voters is in the same building as AIPAC in Los Angeles, and I can’t get my friends in each to have coffee. Israel’s percentage of solar energy is 4 percent, which is 1 percent higher than California.

I encourage you to stay on this topic.

Howard Welinsky
via e-mail

Thou Shalt Not Lie

I can understand why Teresa Strasser would want to lie to her grandmother in order not to break the old woman’s heart by telling her that her Catholic husband was not Jewish (“Thou Shalt Not Lie…ish,” Oct. 31). What I cannot understand is the obvious relish she received from the ruse.

The article made me very sad. If we are lucky enough to live to our 90s, is it better to live out our last days being lied to by our loved ones? When everything else is taken away from you, do you lose the truth as well?

Pat Weiner
Los Angeles

Same-Sex Marriage

Orthodox Judaism doesn’t even recognize civil marriage for Jewish couples (Advertisement, Oct. 31). Besides, we live in a constitutional democracy, not a theocracy. Why do you care that same-sex couples wish to marry?

I am the proud, Jewish father of a wonderful girl, and I was born gay.

I will not tolerate anyone telling my daughter that her family is less legitimate than any other.

William Kaplan
Los Angeles

It is troubling that some Orthodox rabbis have joined with the Christian right to eliminate same-sex civil marriage. Banning same-sex civil marriage is about as relevant to Orthodox Judaism as banning the sale of shellfish.

Jack Rosenfeld
Los Angeles

Policy Statement

We are in complete agreement with your policy statement regarding accepting advertisements (Advertorial, Nov. 7). The Jewish Journal is a paper that speaks to the entire and marvelously diverse Jewish community in greater Los Angeles.

Middie and Richard Giesberg
Los Angeles

Larry and Me

Jews have always felt for the downtrodden and then allowed themselves to be used and abused (“Larry and Me,” Oct. 31). They seem to have short memories and choose to overlook important issues. Since Larry Greenfield disagrees with you, you consider him wrong. No, you are. You prefer to believe in fiction, not facts.

There are plenty of Jewish Republicans who see the world more clearly than you, but you ridicule them. Thank God for Greenfield, who presents the real world, not the dream world.

Robert Reyto
Los Angeles

Begone, bygones! Green is the new blue and white Read More »