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November 10, 2005

7days

Saturday, November 12

Temple Isaiah’s Festival of Jewish Artisans returns for its 25th year this weekend. Help celebrate and stock up on Chanukah presents and other Judaica by attending the opening night concert, artists reception and preview sale today, or artisans show and sale and children’s concert tomorrow.

7:30 p.m. (Sat.), 11:30 a.m.-6 p.m. (Sun.). $2-$50. Temple Isaiah, 10345 W. Pico Blvd., West Los Angeles. (310) 277-2772.

Sunday, November 13

Is marriage between two celebrated authors more gratifying and blissful? Rabbi David Wolpe gets some insight this morning as literary super couple Jonathan Safran Foer (“Everything is Illuminated”) and Nicole Krauss (“Man Walks Into a Room”) grant a rare joint interview at Sinai Temple’s Blumenthal Library.

11 a.m. $15-$20. 10400 Wilshire Blvd., Los Angeles. (310) 481-3217.

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Monday, November 14

Delicious, delightful delis are the subject of author Sheryll Bellman’s new book, “America’s Great Delis: Recipes and Traditions from Coast to Coast.” Vintage photos, menus, signs and recipes from America’s best-loved delicatessens crowd the pages of this new release, depicting the slice of Jewish life that became an American institution.

$35.

Tuesday, November 15

More holidays a-comin’, which means more food. Go beyond the passé deep-fried turkey this year, with the help of the University of Judaism’s “Cooking with Judy Zeidler: A Thanksgiving Dinner.” The author of “The Gourmet Jewish Cook” promises side dish and dessert suggestions, as well as tips on how to cook the bird.

10 a.m.-1 p.m. University of Judaism, 15600 Mulholland Drive, Bel Air. R.S.V.P., (310) 440-1246.

Wednesday, November 16

First-time, 60-something author Myriam Chapman reads and signs her historical fiction novel, based on her grandmother’s memoirs, this evening at Duttons Brentwood. Set in 20th-century France, “Why She Married Him” tells the story of Nina Schavranski, a young Russian Jewish émigré forced into choices that take her away from her dreams.

7 p.m. 11975 San Vicente Blvd., Los Angeles. (310) 476-6263.

The name alone beckoned us. Now monthly at the Friars of Beverly Hills comes “Hoodzpah! A Black and Jewish Comedy Experience.” Tonight, see stand-up and sketch comedy by Sunda Croonquist, James Harris, Tommy Savitt, Roz Browne and Darren Carter.

7:30 p.m. Free. 9900 Santa Monica Blvd., Beverly Hills. (310) 443-1992.

Thursday, November 17

More unity through comedy today, this time from Middle Easterners of every persuasion. The Levantine Cultural Center presents “Sultans of Satire,” a lineup of comedians headlined by Israeli American Iris Bahr, and featuring Persian Maz Jobrani, Palestinian Mormon Aron Kader, Assyrian New Yorker and Iraq War vet Vince Ouchana, and Peter the Persian, an attorney by day and Iranian comic by night.

8 p.m. $10-$15. 5920 Blackwelder St., Culver City. R.S.V.P., (310) 559-5544.

Friday, November 18

Russian Jewish immigrant Eugene Yelchin offers up an intensely emotional series of paintings he has titled “Section Five,” now on view at the Jan Baum Gallery. “‘Section Five’ refers to the fifth section of the former Soviet Union passport, which stated a citizen’s ethnicity,” Yelchin writes. “In the passport I carried until I emigrated from Russia to the U.S., the fifth paragraph listed me as ‘Yevrei,’ Jew.” Yelchin used no brushes, but only his hands, to paint his works that recall passport photos.

Through Dec. 21. 170 S. La Brea Ave., Los Angeles. (323) 932-0170.

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Hey Kids!

The Fire Within

“Dark and difficult times lie ahead, Harry. Soon we must all face the choice between what is right … and what is easy.”

These are the words of Hogwarts headmaster Albus Dumbledore in the film “Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire,” the fourth film based on the popular series of books by J.K. Rowling, which opens Nov. 18.

FYI: In Israel, the latest film is called “Harry Potter Ugevia Ha’Aish.”

Will you be seeing it?

Stump Your Parents

“Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire,” introduces a slew of new words and concepts. Quiz your parents, grandparents and older siblings and see if they know what is true and what is false. Are they as smart as Harry’s gal pal Hermione Granger or as clueless as Harry’s cousin, Dudley Dursley?

1) An auror is another name for the captain of the Quiddich team.

2) The only person to survive the Avada Kedavra, the killing curse, is Harry Potter.

3) The Death Eaters are the supporters of Lord Voldemort.

4) Gillyweed allows a person to fly.

5) The Floo Network is the No. 1 television channel in the wizarding world.

Bonus question: What three schools are in the Triwizard Tournament?

Jr. Sherlocks

Thanks to following eagle-eyed readers who spotted the error on last week’s Hey Kids: Ariel Weinreich, Ilan Elkabetz, Renina Michelson and Mimi Erlick.

Halloween Yes or No?

Mimi Erlick, 10, says: “It’s a pagan holiday, yes, but it’s turned into a Hallmark holiday and it doesn’t have much of a pagan theme anymore. I think that Jewish children should do Halloween. It’s not bad anymore.” Mimi went trick or treating in her neighborhood with two other Jewish families.

Kein v’ Lo

This section of the page will be a way for you to sound off on an issue. This month’s kein v’ lo (yes and no) is about Harry Potter. How does Harry Potter remind us about Jewish values? Is Harry Potter a positive influence for young Jews? Here’s some stuff to think about:

The Kein Side:

• Hogwarts is like a yeshiva where wizarding students go to learn. Learning there is hard work but important. That’s the way school should be.

• Harry’s nemesis Voldemort (aka “He Who Must Not Be Named”) is like Amalek, the evil force that tries to destroy the Jews in every generation. So the idea of an evil force makes sense for Jews.

• Harry bravely supports his friends and teachers, especially Dumbledore (who is like a rosh yeshiva, the wise and good leader of a school).

The Lo Side:

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• The Torah forbids magic.: “When you come into the land … there shall not be found among you any one who makes his son or his daughter pass through the fire, or who uses divination, or a soothsayer, or an enchanter, or a witch, or a charmer, or a medium, or a wizard, or a necromancer. For all that do these things are an abomination to God” (Deuteronomy 18:9-13).

• Harry Potter is set in a Christian world — with Christmas trees and Christmas presents. In the books and movies, it’s like other religions don’t even exist.

• The books are too violent, and Harry’s character sets a bad example by trying to solve dangerous problems himself, when he should call for the help of adults.

• Hogwarts and magic may seem like fun, but they aren’t real. Kids have to learn to value real life and real school. The real magic is how well you can live your life: how hard you work, how well you treat people – without using magic.

You debate, you decide. Remember, before you offer your opinion think hard about the other points of view. We want to know what you think. E-mail your thoughts to kids@jewishjournal.com with the subject line Kein V’Lo: Harry Potter.

Answers to Stump Your Parents

1) False (an auror is a wizard specializing in detecting and detaining dark wizards); 2) True; 3) True; 4) False (Gillyweed enables a person wizard to breathe underwater); 5) False (the Floo Network are navigable fireplaces); Bonus: Hogwarts, Durmstrang and Beauxbatons.

Hey Kids! Read More »

Letters

Katrina Efforts

Since my return from Mississippi, I have been told that as a community we have done all there is to be done by offering new beginnings to evacuees who have left their homes in New Orleans (“Going in After Katrina,” Sept. 16). We have sent lots of money to the ravaged communities and to charitable organizations, such as the Red Cross, that are engaged in providing first responders. We have sent funds to the Jewish federations in the affected communities. In doing all of that we have discharged our responsibilities, or have we?

Have we truly discharged our duties by sending monies? What about offering to send some of our Hebrew School teachers to take over the classes for the teachers who need to reconstruct their lives? How about offering to restock the libraries of the synagogues, Hebrew schools and Jewish centers that have lost everything? How about encouraging our bar and bat mitzvah students to twin with their peers in the affected communities? How about sending volunteers to help the nursing home residents?

Gila Katz
Executive Director
Klein Chaplaincy Service

Where’s Rabin?

As I entered synagogue last Shabbat morning, several of my friends commented to me on the extensive Page 1 article, complete with color picture, in that morning’s Los Angeles Times on the 10th anniversary of Yitzhak Rabin’s assassination and its implication for Israeli society. Most of us agreed that the Rabin assassination was surely one of the most important moments in Jewish history in our lifetime.

Imagine my surprise when I returned home after services and looked at The Jewish Journal that had arrived. The cover was about the upcoming California elections (Cover, Nov. 4).

I am an avid consumer of much of news available in the general media and look to The Jewish Journal for news on the Jewish world. Increasingly the Journal is not providing that.

Perhaps you should reexamine your editorial policies.

Mara Levy
Santa Monica

Rabbinical Commentary

I would also love to see a haftarah commentary in addition to the Torah commentary (Letters, Nov. 4). However, I do not think having commentary from the three major movements would be beneficial. I like the way that you have different rabbis write the commentaries, and in this way you can give us the perspectives of the different movements.

Thank you for all you do to produce this wonderful newspaper!

Cathy O’Krent
Via e-mail

Making History

Mazel tov to Steven Spielberg and to USC for creating a permanent home for the Shoah Visual History Foundation (“Shoah Foundation Makes USC Its Home,” Oct. 28). Spielberg’s 10 years dedicated to creating a lasting tribute to those who survived the Holocaust will help ensure that the world will never forget. We all share responsibility to play a role in this effort.

To that end, Beth Chayim Chadashim (www.bcc-la.org) is proud to host a communitywide commemoration of Kristallnacht, the infamous Nights of Broken Glass, precursor of the Shoah. We will honor Holocaust survivor Olga Grilli, born in Chotebor, Czechoslovakia, who gave her testimony to the Shoah Foundation several years ago. Grilli was rescued on a Kindertransport at age 11 and survived the war in England, ultimately immigrating to the United States.

Our discovery of that testimony at the Shoah Foundation set in motion a series of events that will culminate Friday, Nov. 11, in reuniting Grilli with a Torah scroll from her hometown — a Torah that her uncle and grandfather once held.

We are grateful to Spielberg, the Shoah Foundation and USC for preserving and helping us to bring to life this important part of Jewish and world history.

Rabbi Lisa Edwards
Beth Chayim Chadashim
Stephen Sass
Sylvia Sukop
Event co-chairs

Shul Attraction

David Suissa’s opinion piece, suggesting that cantors surprise congregants by mixing up melodies is a wonderful idea and, though not new, is a suggestion that I, and no doubt most my colleagues, have been doing week in and week out, for many years (“A Surprise Might Attract More to Shuls,” Nov. 4). There are two questions, however, that I would ask regarding this suggestion: a) is this what our members want and b) would this, in fact, draw more people to synagogue?

The answer to the first question is maybe. In a recent survey of my congregation, over half the respondents stated that they prefer when the chazzan, “sings the traditional melodies.” While what is traditional for one Jew is not necessarily traditional for another, clearly when people do come to synagogue, they like to participate in the liturgy, singing a prayer to a musical setting to which they are familiar.

The second question is one that cannot be answered in one Jewish Journal article, or even 100. Suissa is correct — liberal synagogues today compete with Starbucks to attract attendees. We also compete with soccer games, a sale at the mall and general Jewish apathy. Some Jews are attracted to synagogues that offer a niche service on a monthly basis; no doubt participation at these services would drop precipitously if they occurred each and every Shabbat.

When the celebration of Shabbat on a weekly basis becomes a priority for members of the non-Orthodox Jewish community (the community to which I proudly belong) the struggle to attract more people to synagogue will finally conclude.

Chazzan Keith Miller
Kehillat Ma’arav-The Westside Congregation
Santa Monica

Still Smarting

Don’t despair, Amy (“Still Smarting,” Nov. 4). There are men, such as myself, who prefer strong, intelligent women.

David Wincelberg
Beverly Hills

Still Silent

I, too, lament the changes on Fairfax Avenue (“Fairfax Shops Feel the Squeeze,” Oct. 21). But I’ve heard nothing about the famed Silent Movie Theatre, as prominent a landmark on Fairfax Avenue since 1942 as Canter’s and the Farmers Market, and the only theater of its kind in America!

Eddie Cress
Sylmar

Wrong Conclusion

I fail to see the logical link in Leonard Fein’s “Rosa Parks’ Message for Today” (Nov. 4). Parks and Southern blacks of her time faced massive injustice of all types based on racist laws and customs. From this undeniable fact Fein jumps to the “persistent, grinding poverty that still exists in our country….” Is he suggesting that poverty is state sanctioned, or that “ignoring” poverty is the same as the official discrimination, the lynchings, denial of education, segregation and disenfranchisement that were characteristic of the pre-civil rights era?

Chaim Sisman
Los Angeles

Too Far Left?

I was just wondering if you ever got tired of (or actually, had even noticed) that reading The Jewish Journal is like reading the talking points of the Democratic National Committee. You and others who write in these pages are always lamenting the low affiliation rates among American Jews and are brainstorming about how to increase it. I’d like to suggest you consider taking the politics out of Judaism.

It is a fundamental reality of modern American Jewish life that becoming involved in any Jewish organization is tantamount to joining the left-wing of the Democrat Party. I challenge anyone who seriously disagrees with this statement to come up with even one issue on which any major Jewish organization and the Democrat Party disagree. Furthermore, the vast majority of liberal Jews who are actually proud of these positions (of which, I freely concede, there are many) are, at heart, secular humanists, who truly believe religion is the opiate of the masses and that it is the root of much evil in the world. It should not surprise anyone that recruiting people from this group to join religious organizations is difficult at best. Judaism does not equal the Democrat Party, and I’d like to provide two brief examples to illustrate my point.

1) Tzedakah. While we can all agree that tzedakah is a prime Jewish value, everyone reading this letter should be aware that Maimonides elucidated eight levels of tzedakah. The lowest form is a handout (welfare, food stamps) while the highest form is teaching someone a trade so that they don’t need tzedakah. This approach is exemplified by (Women’s American) ORT, which raises money to build schools to teach people a trade.

2) Abortion. The halacha is clear that abortion is permissible to save the life or health of the mother. A valid halachic argument can even be made that psychological distress counts as harm. But how in the heck did we get from the halacha to being against parental notification when a minor child wants an abortion? I would like to suggest that the entire point of knowing that a minor child is having high-risk unprotected sex is precisely so that the grown-ups can intervene and change the behavior, not keep it secret. The tiresome argument about rape or incest is a red herring; I am a practicing pediatrician who has to deal with far-too-many teen and preteen pregnancies (and sexually transmitted diseases), and I can literally count on one hand the number of times rape or incest were involved. Besides, if we even suspect the minor is being abused or will be abused, we immediately notify the police and the Department of Child and Family Services who intervene and, in loco parentis, represent and protect the child.

In conclusion, perhaps if Jewish clergy and Jewish organizations returned to teaching Jewish values and left how best to live those values in daily life up to individual Jews, perhaps you’d see an increase in affiliation rates and in your paper’s circulation.

Dr. Rabbi Andrew L. Teperson
Palmdale

 

Letters Read More »

Obituaries

George Allen Smith,
Philanthropist and Founder of George Smith Partners, Inc.,
Dies at 70

George Allen Smith, a leader in Southern California’s real estate finance industry, died Nov. 3 at 70. A graduate of the Harvard Business School, Smith, whose career in the industry spanned four decades, founded George Smith Partners Real Estate, a commercial mortgage brokerage firm, in 1992.

Smith and his wife, Pam, championed many institutions, including The Jewish Federation of Greater Los Angeles and the Museum of Contemporary Art. His chief philanthropic endeavor was the founding of the Ataxia Telangiectasia Research Foundation (A-TMRF), an organization devoted to funding research into a rare neurological disease affecting his daughter, Rebecca. Since its inception in 1984, the A-TMRF granted more than $10 million in research funding worldwide, including the endowment of the Rebecca Smith Chair in A-T Research at the David Geffen School of Medicine at UCLA.

“George approached every challenge with a level of confidence that was inspiring and contagious,” said Dr. Richard Gatti, who holds the Rebecca Smith Distinguished Professorship at UCLA.

To raise funds for the A-TMRF, Smith initiated the annual George Smith Partners Real Estate Luncheon, an event which now attracts more than 1,500 industry professionals. At this year’s event, Smith was presented with an honorary doctorate from Tel Aviv University.

Smith is survived by his wife, Pam; sons, James and Matthew; daughters, Jill Oaks and Rebecca; grandchildren, Samantha and Hannah; and sister, Eleanor (Gerald) Sorkin.

Donations can be made to the A-TMRF c/o Haskell and Davis, 16000 Ventura Blvd., Suite 806, Encino, CA 91436. — Nancy Sokoler Steiner, Contributing Writer

Samuel Baradaran died Oct. 12 at 65. He is survived by his daughter, Shaleen; and cousin, Michael Amin. Groman

ROUHOLLAH BARKHORDARIAN died Oct. 12 at 93. He is survived by his wife, Rose; six children; 16 grandchildren; and 11 great-grandchildren. Hillside

Annette Berman died Sept. 17 at 86. She is survived by her daughters, Jackie (Andy) Stern and Lynn; granddaughters, Traci Tannler and Molly (David) Schlussel; great-grandchildren, Zackary Tannler and Vivienne Schlussel; and brother, Sy (Lennet) Ogulnick. Mount Sinai

RAYMOND BLACKMAN died Oct. 11 at 81. He is survived by his brother, Al. Sholom Chapels.

HYMAN BARNETT BOOKMAN died Sept. 28 at 95. He is survived by his son, Jack; two grandchildren; and brother, Albert. Hillside

HARRY BRODSKY died Oct. 12 at 95. He is survived by his daughter, Iris (Mickey) Weiss; three grandchildren; and four great-grandchildren. Hillside

MELINDA EVELYN BRUN died Sept. 30 at 63. She is survived by her husband, William; daughter, Chandra; and nephew, Erik Laykin. Hillside

RAYE REENA CARLIN died Oct. 8 at 87. She is survived by her son, Martin (Caroline); daughter, Maxine; grandchildren, Laura and Mitchell; and great-grandson, Daniel. Hillside

SARAH GARFINKEL died Sept. 28 at 94. She is survived by her daughter, Sandy (Ron) Shenkman; and granddaughter, Stephanie Shenkman. Hillside

MARIAN LAURANS GETZOFF died Sept. 29 at 88. She is survived by sons, Peter and Stephen; daughter, Barbara Huff; daughter-in-law, Kay; seven grandchildren; three great-grandchildren; sister, Eleanor Feller; and brother, Raymond Laurans. Hillside

NANCY LYNN GOFF died Oct. 10 at 50. She is survived by her mother, Cecile; and sister, Julie (Dr. Ben) Simon. Sholom Chapels.

JANICE HAMLIN died Oct. 2 at 83. She is survived by her husband, Morris; sons, Richard (Delia) and Robert; and four grandchildren. Hillside

HYMIE HERSOWITZ died Oct. 11 at 87. He is survived by his wife, Eva; and son, Selwyn. Sholom Chapels.

Estrea Rozanes Kapuya-Berro died Oct. 12 at 93. She is survived by her son, Eliezer (Venus) Kapuya; and three grandchildren. Malinow and Silverman

Ralph Kaye died Oct. 11 at 86. He is survived by his wife, Helen; sons, Irv and Marc (Renée); daughter, Debbie; five grandchildren; and brothers, Eugene and Norman. Sholom Chapels.

BOB LEVY, JR. died Oct. 8 at 95. He is survived by his son, Bob. Hillside

CLARA LEWIN died Sept. 27 at 90. She is survived by her nephew, Gabor Szekeres. Hillside

Joyce Loraine Lynch died Oct. 10 at 67. She is survived by her daughters, Catherine and Michele. Malinow and Silverman

Leon Markus died Oct. 13 at 89. He is survived by his wife, Charlotte; sons, Jeffrey and Michael; daughter, Judith Knobel; five grandchildren; and one great-grandchild. Groman

Karl Meyer died Oct. 11 at 81. He is survived by his children, Steven (Randi) and Michael (Heather). Mount Sinai

WILLIAM NEWMAN died Sept. 29 at 79. He is suvived by his wife, Sheila; son, Ian (Karen); daughters, Dana (Tim) and Mara (Paul); and six grandchildren. Hillside

Shoshana Noily died Oct. 13 at 97. She is sirvived by her sons, Josh and Samuel; daughters-in-law; four grandchildren; and two great-grandchildren.

MARVIN DAVID RATNER died Sept. 29 at 84. He is survived by his wife, Mildred; sons, Rabbi Robert (Susan) and Andrew (Kathi); brother, Stanley; eight grandchildren; and great-grandson, Yael. Hillside

BEATRICE PEARL RIEMER died Oct. 3 at 86. She is survived by her children, Rick, Ken and Terry; and four grandchildren. Hillside

Sylvia Ringelheim died Oct. 14 at 79. She is survived by her daughters, Sherrill Lewis and Arlene Parker; and one grandchild. Groman

MARLENE ROBINSON died Oct. 10 at 73. She is survived by her daughter, Marlene (Richard) Arnold. Sholom Chapels.

Morris Romerstein died Oct. 11 at 92. He is survived by his daughter, Anne (Charles) Grob; son, Samuel; and one grandchild. Malinow and Silverman

DOROTHY ROSENTHAL died Oct. 10 at 83. She is survived by her daughter, Michele (Sam); two granddaughters; brother, Bernie (Marcia); three nieces; and eight great-nieces and great-nephews.

Bernard Saffe died Oct. 13 at 81. He is survived by his son, Gary; daughters, Sari Garger and Rickie Louis; and three grandchildren. Groman

LORAINE ROSETTA SCHWARTZ died Oct. 11 at 86. She is survived by her daughter, Carole Jablon; and granddaughters, Tess and Jordon Jablon. Hillside

MONETT SCHWARTZ died Oct. 3 at 83. She is survived by her son, Paul (Sheila); daughter, Susan (Steven) Bromberg; seven grandchildren; and two great-grandchildren. Hillside

Martha Sego died Oct. 13 at 96. She is survived by her son, Peter; and one grandchild. Groman

Art Shaimes died Oct. 12 at 68. He is survived by his wife, Meredith; daughters, Cathy (Robert) Manzi and Lori (Rich) Hammer; son, Martin (Jeanette); and eight grandchildren. Mount Sinai

Elias Solz died Oct. 13 at 81. He is survived by his wife, Harriet; daughter, Heidi (Roger) Kerr; son, William (Susan) Solz; and four grandchildren. Malinow and Silverman

Esther Mazo Sosner died Oct. 14 at 97. She is survived by her sons, Bernard (Phyllis), Harold (Gail) and Howard (Elaine); seven grandchildren; eight great-grandchildren; and sister, Beatrice Cord. Mount Sinai

FREYDA PENNER SPATZ died Sept. 30 at 87. She is survived by her daughers, Julie DaVanzo (Frank), Barbara and Andrea (Bob Wunderlich); and four grandchildren. Hillside

Harry Weiner died Oct. 11 at 89. He is survived by his sons, Ken and Norm; daughter, Charlene Garcia; nine grandchildren; and one great-grandchild. Groman

CHARLOTTE MARIE COFFMAN WEISS died Sept. 28 at 88. She is survived by her sons sons, Rabbi Ken (Sue) and Dr. Mark (Marilyn); eight grandchildren; six great-grandchildren; and sister, Mildred Foreman. Hillside

MORRIS WINKLER died Oct. 8 at 76. He is survived by his wife, Mitzi; and son, Jaime. Hillside

 

Obituaries Read More »

Anti-Semitism Trumps Sex

A dig about Jews took center stage on “The Apprentice” — again. And once again, it was a loser.

“Apprentice” stars real-life rich developer Donald Trump, who fires one job applicant after another, finally offering a real job to the survivor.

The remark occurred in the Nov. 3 episode, in which the competing aspirants, divided into two teams, had to lead a class at The Learning Annex (where Trump also has taught). Students scored the team of “teachers.” Members of the lower-scoring team risked getting fired.

Team Capital Edge, led that week by 22-year-old Adam, chose the topic of sex in the workplace. During the presentation, Adam, who admitted discomfort with the subject, talked about being a “nice Jewish boy from Atlanta.”

While discussing taking someone to dinner for a first date, he added, “I have to feel really comfortable with the person, and I also have to be willing to spend the money.”

His teammate, 28-year-old Clay, chimed in with, “But remember, he’s the shy, tight Jewish boy.”

Adam — who was stunned by the remark, as were many in the class — later confronted Clay, who insisted his comment was misinterpreted. Later still, Clay denied saying it in front of Trump. In the end, the Adam/Clay team lost to Team Excel, which had chosen the safe topic of “How to Make Your Mark.”

While talking to Trump, Adam made it clear that he didn’t believe Clay was anti-Semitic but that Clay’s crude presentation style hurt them.

Neither Clay nor Adam got fired — yet. That unhappy prize was reserved for their babbling 41-year-old teammate Markus. But the billionaire and his assistant, George Ross, who is Jewish, took Clay to task, telling him there’s no room in the marketplace for anti-Semitism.

This wasn’t the first time an anti-Semitic remark has had repercussions on “The Apprentice.” Last year, Trump fired contestant Jennifer Crisafulli in the same episode that she blamed a loss on “two old Jewish fat ladies” who had given her team a low score on a restaurant task.

The kicker? She was also fired from her job at a real estate agency for making the remark.

“The Apprentice” airs Thursdays at 9 p.m. on NBC.

 

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Wonderful World of Weird

It was at the end of Yom Kippur services in North Hollywood that comic actor Larry Miller explained to a Journal reporter his new role on ABC’s eye-winking drama, “Desperate Housewives.”

Said Miller, smiling broadly: “I play the neighborhood pornographer!”

Not quite. Miller and Meagan Fay play the Harpers, a frisky Wisteria Lane couple whose homemade video of themselves procreating is viewed accidentally by the show’s teenage characters.

“It’s fun in the way ‘Desperate Housewives’ is fun,” Miller said.

The episode airs Nov. 13.

Miller reported that life is wonderfully weird: “Desperate Housewives” exteriors for Wisteria Lane are shot on Universal Studios’ Colonial Drive, home to the same house used for exteriors on ABC’s 1958-63 sitcom, “Leave It to Beaver.” One day, Miller and other cast members got free on-set ice cream from Long Island Lolita’s Joey Buttafuoco, who now runs a local fleet of ice cream trucks.

“I close my eyes and hold up my arms and I spin,” Miller said. “I absolutely adore every second of life.”

Wonderful World of Weird Read More »

Hatches and Matches

Your news weekly about Jewish life now has an easy, free way to share your Jewish life with others.

At www.jewishjournal.com/Celebrations.php, you can now post wedding, birth, bris, b’nai mitzvah, anniversary, graduation and aliyah announcements. The posting can include photos and links to your Web page, if you like.

Web surfers can use an interactive search engine to see who is celebrating what, and even send congratulations online.

The Jewish Journal will choose from posted items and reprint them — also for free — on our twice-monthly Celebrations page in the back of the paper. The Celebrations page will run the second and third week of each month, between Tribe, a page by and for teens, and our new page for kids.

“The new interactive Celebrations feature joins our interactive community Calendar to make www.jewishjournal.com the Web hub for Jewish L.A.,” Journal Editor-in-Chief Rob Eshman said. The Journal’s online community calendar — also free — has over 2,000 local and regional listings.

For more information, visit — of course — www.jewishjournal.com/Celebrations.php.

 

Hatches and Matches Read More »

Expert Tips Crack the Dress Code

Many wedding guests are often are as concerned as the bride and her attendants about what they will wear.

Once upon a time, there were golden rules of wedding attire: Don’t wear white — it upstages the bride; and don’t wear black — too funereal. It was often a reliable pastel dress and matching pumps hanging in the closet, waiting patiently for the wedding du jour.

Today, one can never go wrong with basic black. But what to do when it comes to a formal affair?

Even though dress codes have become somewhat relaxed, there are still some guidelines that savvy brides and grooms might consider including on their invitations if their wedding is a formal event. Guests are usually grateful for this considerate gesture, especially in an age where “anything goes” when it comes to attire.

To avoid any confusion, Bridal consultant Sue Winner encourages her clients to put some type of dress code description on invitations.

“Some clients are concerned that if they don’t put something [about appropriate dress] on the invitation, people will come in jeans and sport coats. We’ve become a very casual society,” said Winner, who has been in business for 21 years — and has more than 600 weddings under her veil.

Here’s a helpful dress code lexicon from “Town & Country Elegant Weddings” (Hearst Books, $60):

Black Tie

This means that women are to wear evening dresses (short or long) and, technically, men should wear traditional tuxedos. Yet, Winner said, it is not a commandment. She said men can certainly wear a dark suit — navy, black or charcoal gray would be acceptable.

The notation said, “please don’t show up in jeans and a sport coat,” Winner said. “Guests won’t be turned away, but they’ll be uncomfortable in the room.”

And for the women, etiquette expert Letitia Baldrige, the former White House social secretary to Jacqueline Kennedy, advice columnist and author of several books, declares: “Pantsuits are not proper.”

Black Tie, Long Gown

This is not a common edict, but found occasionally — and Winner believes it’s redundant. Some couples find that this gives guests more clarification when the occasion is very dressy. Joan Rivers, for example, used this specific dress code on the invitations to her daughter Melissa’s fancy New York wedding because she felt dress was important to the overall effect of the event. (Take note: Perfect attire does not the perfect marriage make. Melissa’s 1998 marriage to John Endicott ended in divorce five years later.)

Black-Tie Optional

A bewildering dress directive for many guests, this option is considered by many etiquette experts to be very confusing.

“It’s the worst phrase in the English language,” Baldrige said.

Winner said that while common usage sometimes “makes things work, technically it is not correct. Black-tie optional is really a business term,” used, for example, when company officials might be hosting a dinner in honor of its retiring president, yet would not expect all company employees in attendance to rent a tuxedo.

As do most people who take the word optional to mean they don’t have to wear black tie. Those few who do dress up often feel out of place, making for a very mixed-up (and mixed-dress) crowd.

Creative Tie

Another distressing dress code according to Baldrige.

“An affair should either be black tie or not,” she said. “If it is not, you need say nothing at all.”

However, one fashion designer, John Anthony, believes that an invitation stating creative tie signifies that the hosts want the guests to be more thoughtful and lavish in considering their attire. It might mean a patterned cummerbund for the man and a frock that’s something other than the usual little black dress for a woman.

Casual or Island Chic

One bride planning a beach wedding put “island chic” on her invitations, said Winner. For other less formal celebrations, like some bar and bat mitzvah parties, hosts have indicated everything from “No Jeans, No Jackets” to a simple “casual chic.”

When in doubt about attire, Winner has a simple solution: “If you really don’t know, call the bride or the host and ask what they have in mind.”

Sharon Mosely of Copley News Service contributed to this story.

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Attending to Gifts

Your wedding party is an entourage of childhood friends, college roommates, siblings and other close family members. Most have been by your side, contributing their time, energy and love throughout the entire wedding planning process. So, when the big event is about to happen, how best can brides and grooms offer their thanks?

As one would when shopping for any gift, it’s best to keep each individual in mind, choosing imaginative and stylish gifts that come from the heart, say bridal advisers at theknot.com.

Are traditional gifts the way to go?

“Brides can give the bridesmaids something to wear on the wedding day such as a necklace or earrings,” said Kathleen Murray, weddings editor at The Knot. “For the guys, a wine set, Swiss Army knife and golf kits are great traditional ideas.”

Looking for something a little trendier?

Owen Halpern, co-owner of OwenLawrence, an Atlanta boutique, prides himself on offering shoppers items they won’t see in every other shop.

For bridal attendant gifts he suggests a crystal bedside carafe, Italian crystal clocks by Arnolfo Di Cambio or beautifully boxed Italian vodka shot glasses by Salviati — all gift items that are as special as the occasion they mark.

He also said people are “loving” gift items called Elton Rocks, made out of colored, scented resin — “sort of an alternative to potpourri.” (According to Halpern, Elton John allowed his name to be used on the product because a portion of the proceeds are donated to his AIDS foundation.)

Halpern indulges OwenLawrence shoppers with champagne or signature bellinis, offered “only in crystal with linen napkins — no paper or plastic,” to help everyone enjoy “the finer things in life.”

“It’s a stressful time. Brides and grooms can relax and enjoy the shopping experience,” Halpern said.

Anything monogrammed is also popular for attendant gifts.

“Monogramming anything from jewelry to flasks to sandals for a beach wedding is hot right now,” Murray said.

While fountain pens may have become the joke of traditional bar mitzvah gifting, pens are popular as gifts for grooms’ attendants.

“We’ve sold everything form Mont Blanc, Cross and Watermans to Parker and Cartier. Generally we engrave initials of the groomsmen. It’s a small gift, but it’s a valued one,” said Steve Light of Artlite.

No matter how much appreciation you might want to lavish upon your bridal attendants, the sheer quantity can tally a daunting price tag. Be sure to ask yourself how much you plan — and can afford — to spend.

Murray normally advises bridal couples to spend what they can, but on average it’s usually $75 per person. The best man and matron or maid of honor should get something a little more lavish.

Yet, if a tight budget is cramping your style, there are great ways to get by.

Inexpensive gifts for bridesmaids can include an engraved silver photo frame or compact mirror, nice jewelry or beautiful candles.

For groomsmen, engraved pewter beer steins, silver pocketknives or cigar holders are usually low-priced.

Murray says it’s all about being a smart shopper.

“Inexpensive gifts are really just being able to find a great buy,” she said. “The bride may find a bracelet worth thousands of dollars, but if they look harder, they can find one for a lot less.”

Of course, if you decide to splurge on the wedding party, the options are endless. “The Knot Complete Guide to Weddings in the Real World” offers ideas ranging from remote control cars for guys, a certificate for an acclaimed restaurant or spa certificates to tickets to a game or play, silk pajamas, beauty baskets or cigars.

For bridesmaids, Murray says classes are always a popular item.

“Cooking, wine tasting, photography classes are all great options,” she said. “Again, base your decision upon each bridesmaid’s specific interest. For groomsmen, look into golf or ski lessons or even a bottle or case of wine from a great vineyard.”

Still stuck on what to get? Consider using your own talents. Artists can create drawings, paintings or pottery, while musicians can create a CD of their own music.

“If a couple does not feel they have such talents, or do not have time to make their gifts, they can have gift baskets created that are personalized to each attendants’ tastes and interests,” Murray said.

Laura Vogltanz of Copley News Service contributed to this article.

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Don’t Get Tongue Tied With Your Toast

Chances are, someday you’ll be called on to raise a glass and offer a toast, probably at a lifecycle event like a wedding or bar mitzvah. Will you be ready? Will you remember the main points you wanted to make? Or will you end up with glass in hand and foot in mouth?

The toast is primarily a way to say thank you and offer good wishes — thank you to guests for coming, to hosts for inviting you, to celebrants for including you among their friends and to offer best wishes for the future. If you’re smart, you’ll think about what you’re going to say well in advance, before partying and high spirits have lessened your ability to think fast and intelligently. Jotted notes and a little practice will help avoid panic when your big moment arrives.

Helene Popowski, a party-planning consultant, counsels her wedding clients to keep toasts short and sweet — and hopefully warm and heartfelt.

“I suggest a maximum of two toasts, one from the father of the bride and one, if you want it, from the best man. I tell the father of the bride that he is speaking for everyone. He should welcome them, praise the wonderful job his wife did in organizing the occasion, tell his daughter how beautiful and radiant she looks, and welcome his new son into the family,” she said.

When it comes to the best man, she suggests that long stories about the couple’s childhood and romance be reserved for the rehearsal dinner.

“The wedding is no place for crude humor and lengthy speeches,” Popowski added.

Perhaps the best strategy when it comes to delivering a toast is to play it safe. One’s thoughts should be well-prepared, simple and brief — without information of a personal or intimate nature that might embarrass the honorees, their families or their guests.

Other tips to remember:

• Be sincere. Your own thoughts, in your own words, caring and loving, will be remembered more than a slick limerick. After all, you were chosen to make a toast because of your closeness to the honorees. Of all people, you should be able to be complimentary and affectionate on their big day.

• Connect with your subjects. If it’s a bride and groom, make eye contact. If it’s their parents, find them in the crowd and acknowledge them. If it’s a bar or bat mitzvah child, keep the words on his or her level … and no off-color comments ever.

• Keep it noncontroversial. No sex, politics or religion. This isn’t Hannity and Colmes, but a tribute to a happy occasion.

• Be upbeat. Be serious if you must, in briefly mentioning a recently departed parent or close friend, but don’t dwell on sadness or how unhappy you are to lose your best friend to a new bride.

• Always be positive. So what if you can’t stand her groom. Be gracious and remember the old saying, “If you can’t say something nice about someone, don’t say anything at all.” This is not the time to talk about old escapades or unfilled expectations.

• Don’t be pompous or self-absorbed. It’s their day, nobody wants to hear your long-winded musings on the meaning of life.

• Be sober, at least somewhat. A drunken blather is no compliment to anyone. Toasts are to be sipped, not chugged. And remember to raise your glass to the honorees before sipping yourself.

• Be gently funny if it fits your personality, but not raucous. And never, ever use hurtful humor to make people laugh. Calling the bride by the groom’s old girlfriend’s name is not apt to endear you to either of them. And vulgar language, lewd references and bathroom humor are always out of place at festive occasions, unless you’re proposing a toast at a bachelor party, and maybe even then. Just remember not to say anything you wouldn’t want your own mother to hear coming out of your mouth.

What to do if you’re really uncomfortable speaking in public? Other than practicing ahead of time, you have a few options: Read something by someone else, a Bible passage, a Shakespearean sonnet or the couple’s favorite love poem. Make it very short and sweet: L’Chaim! (to life). Or write out your short toast and read it. Don’t try to speak extemporaneously if you’re nervous. Don’t try to speak at all if you’re drunk. If you’re really, really bad with words, you can ask a friend for help, or try the Internet, where a number of Web sites will gladly write a toast for you, for a fee, of course.

When it comes to weddings, traditionally the best man offers the first toast. It’s considered polite for everyone in the room to stop drinking and hold their glasses in anticipation of the toast. At a formal wedding, the bride and groom should not toast themselves, but rather allow their guests to offer the toasts.

Sometimes the bride’s father makes the first toast, acknowledging the bride and groom. The groom then replies with his own toast. But whatever order you decide upon, just remember to let the toasts be short and sweet, honoring the occasion and those gathered to help celebrate the joy of the day.

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