Category
girlfriend
My Single Peeps: Guershon M.
The most embarrassing aspect of Guershon’s life is that he’s 34 and lives with his mom, so of course I’ll lead with that. “I started film school and I [moved in with my mom], and the hardest thing for me was it seemed like [my friends] had all their s— together. It was really hard for me to really go out a lot and date … and it’s gotten progressively harder. It’s kind of hard to say, ‘Yeah, I live at home.’ It was really embarrassing — especially when I hit 30. Then I started seeing my friends where I lived saying, ‘I got laid off. I can’t believe it, but I have to live with my parents again.’ So I said, ‘OK, this leveled the playing field a little for me.’ ”
My Single Peeps: Isaac S.
When Isaac sits down to speak with me, I see the rugged beard with a shot of gray around the chin, the athletic build and the tight-fitting Israeli-style clothes, and I think, “I know exactly who this guy is.” He has an Israeli accent, so when he first says to me, “In Israel I was in the army and then came here and worked as a professional dancer,” I’m not sure I’ve heard correctly. A dancer? I ask him to repeat himself.
The Candy Man Can
If you\’ve ever tried to split a Big Hunk candy bar — the kind made out of brittle white nougat and peanuts — then you understand a typical breakup.
No Deposit, No Return
Dating is difficult enough without asking for a guarantee. Imagine my surprise when the last guy I went out with wanted just that.
‘Talk to You Soon’
A short time ago, in a galaxy all too familiar, a smart, adorable guy I\’d been chatting with for months faded — like one too many others — into oblivion. The red flags were raised from day one.
Singles – Want, Not Want
Relationships in my life never seem to end. Guys are always calling me back, weeks, months, years later. My life is like an Arnold Schwarzenegger movie: He\’ll be back. After a breakup I try to remember this, that there are never any goodbyes, just au revoirs. Trickle Trickle Drip Drip.
Watch Out Ladies, Dad’s Dating Again
Sure, I\’ve dated a fair amount, but the over-70 age range is one even I haven\’t yet ventured into. Don\’t have a clue as to what those gals have on their mind. But judging from the women I do know, I\’m guessing cats and jewelry wouldn\’t be too far off.
Singles – Poetry in Motion
In one night, I had dinner at an all-you-can eat salad bar in Arcadia, met my father\’s first girlfriend in 25 years and weathered a nearly disastrous poetry emergency.
Sound the onomatopoetic sirens; this thing was a relationship 911. Free verse was about to cost my father the best relationship of his life. And it was my fault. What rhymes with \”Zero tact\”?
So there I was, sitting across the table from dad\’s new girlfriend, trying to impress her, using my best table manners, eating forkfuls of canned beets on my self-consciously dainty salad and thinking to myself: \”This is just weird.\”
Will She Marry Him?
\”You guys know I love Carrie very much, and I\’m going to ask her to marry me. I\’d like to get your blessing.\”