If He had created the first iPhone but had made it nearly impossible to get WiFi anywhere, Dayenu.
If He had made it possible to get WiFi everywhere, but had not made a Facebook app, Dayenu.
If He had made a Facebook app, but had not created an Instagram app, Dayenu.
If He had made an Instagram app, but had not made the smartphone small enough to be taken into the bathroom during every visit, Dayenu.
If He had created the smartphone compact enough to be taken into the bathroom, but not small enough to not be noticed by your children as they watch you scroll and scroll when you should be playing with them, Dayenu.
If He had made your children compassionate enough to not notice that you are addicted to your phone, but your partner still watched in quiet disappointment as you scrolled away during your dinner date, Dayenu.
If your partner was also addicted to his or her phone, but made sure to never stare down at the device while crossing a busy intersection, Dayenu.
If you yourself had been almost run over while looking down at your phone in the middle of a busy intersection, but the phone had survived the whole incident without a scratch, Dayenu.
If your phone had not endured a single scratch, but would mysteriously and abruptly shut off during the Passover Seder with your nearest and dearest, for the love of God, Dayenu.
Tabby Refael is a Los Angeles-based writer and smartphone addict.