A Rosh Hashanah rap
Fifty Seven Seventy Five / is not the combo of my locker
It’s also not the age of my Mother to Father
Not the goals of Brazil vs. German World Cup soccer
It is the year of Israel/ kiss the land upon
when I El-Al’ed her
Sweet new year / for my future Jewish lovely
That “high holiday” time of month / after my
It resonates from Qiryat Tivon to Pico / land
of the sunny
A couple l’chaims later / everything is smiles
and so funny.
The first of Tishrei / remembers Adam and Eve
The shofar blows / honey cake ’n’ apples and treats
Confused so great / till my tummy aches
On Yom Kippur I’ll fast / and lose all that weight
A holiday we CAN celebrate / even if it’s a
If we can’t make it to shul / we eat sweet
and take a hike up Runyon
We fight with our families / and they pretend
it’s a discussion
We embrace carbohydrates / because that’s “what’s in”
We are Ashkenazi, Persian, Sephardic, Ladino, Mizrahi
… and … Russian.
We make it home / for least one night of the two
We bring home a girl / that our Mother will not like
(and it’s true)
We travel across the nation / to see them for
And if things are all wrong / we pretend to not act
like some victim
Rosh Hashanah / head of the new year
Yom Kippur cleanses us from our old fears
No magic ball drops along with cone hats / Times Square / month-old beers
We are just rejoicing because Moshiach is almost here 🙂
We recall great shows like Friends …
Costanza and Cheers
This year, Less Manishewitz — more “Man I Schivtz”
Less 24-hour partying — more 24-hour fitness
More calling our brothers and sisters about things
And matter of fact … more minding our own business
(especially as a Jewish rapper/actor)
Less lashon hara / if we fight / more making up
Less shopping at Sephora /more creating trust
Pursue my goals / stick to a plan
12 weeks at a time / 4 times as much money this year
if I can
Throwing bread crumbs / in a river
Say good-bye and repent / for Joan Rivers
This is different from Passover
These herbs are not bitter
As I mention before / it’s time to set our goals
If we are in business / lets hope more items are sold
Acknowledge more Jews / be passionate with more soul
And let’s shack up already / It’s 5775 /
and we are getting old
For the end of My rap
Let me give a shout out to my future wife/ OY VEY!
I promise to swipe right / say OK! / and be Awkward…
in a Good Way
I’ll message you first / and I’ll pay for the Bill.
Happy 5775 LA / Sincerely
The best Jewish rapper in Koreatown @koshadillz
Follow Rami Even-Esh on Twitter @koshadillz; for more, go to koshadillzworld.com.
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