February 22, 2019

Dating 101: Setting up a Blind Date

Several months ago I went on a date with a man who was lovely, but there was no spark. On paper we made sense, but in person we didn’t really have anything in common other than faith. Important to note I don’t think you need things in common to connect. Boots and I had a spark from our first phone call and while we may be different, we share the same worldview about family, faith, parenting, and politics. We have very different histories, but are connected in random, surprising, funny, and wonderful ways.

Sometimes there is a spark and others times no. It’s not just about a physical spark either. In order for me to have a connection with a man, he must make me laugh, have mischief in his eyes, and be able to talk about something other than himself. There is a thing that perhaps cannot be articulated other than it is just a spark. If he makes you laugh, has great stories, blue eyes like an ocean, a bald head, arms the size of thighs, and feels like a comfortable pair of Boots, well that is lucky. Dating actually has a lot to do wtih luck.

I thanked my date for a nice time and let him know that while he was lovely, I didn’t think we were a match. I also told him I knew someone I thought he might really match up with and I would like to set him up. He was offended at first, but I eventually talked him into it. If you are dating with honest intentions, then the goal is to meet someone to share your life with, or perhaps just sleep with, depending on what your truth is. You just need to be clear on what you want.I have set up dates before and sometimes it is a hit but others, not so much.

The next day I called a girlfriend of mine and asked if I could set her up with my date from the night before. She told me I was insane and passed on my offer. It took a little sweet talking, but she eventually agreed to meet him for one date. I sent him her number and told him he should definitely give her a call. When he didn't, I nudged him a bit. Cut to last night at 11:30 when my phone rang. It was my girlfriend calling to let me know he proposed and she said yes. Almost 7 months after their first date, they’re engaged.

I had lunch with the happy couple today and it was fantastic. They’re perfect for each other and I am thrilled for them. It is a blessing to be able to see love like this and that they were brave enough to go on the date, to then be rewarded with love, is amazing. Without risk there is no reward and that most especially applies to the search for love. I felt real happiness to hear them speak of his proposal, and we laughed as they talked about my setting them up. It is a blessing to find love and I feel lucky to have met him, so he could meet her.

I suppose love is easier to spot after a certain age because we have had it, lost it, not recognized it, and mistaken it for something else. These two people have found it with each other and I am thrilled to have seen it unfold from the very beginning. Dating is rough and so if we can help each other out, why not? I am a lover of love. I love to see it, hear about it, dream about it, write about it, and God willing find it again for myself. To my two lovely friends, Mazel Tov! You remind me to believe in love and keep the faith.