February 21, 2019

Kim Kardashian is naked. Nothing new here people.

I think Kim Kardashian is a beautiful woman. By woman of course I mean surgically tweaked woman. She was pretty before she took to the knife, but to be fair, her new beauty now takes a lot more time to pull together. The surgery recovery alone takes weeks and weeks, let alone the false lashes application. I am not taking anything away from how pretty she is, but I have yet to discover why this seemingly talentless girl fascinates the world the way she does.

Her family became famous when her father defended OJ Simpson. He was on the team of attorneys that freed a man after he beheaded Nicole Brown and viciously murdered Ron Goldman. Not sure why they hang onto that fame, but they do. Kim became D-List famous as a closet organizer for Paris Hilton, then was elevated to D-List Porn Star, when her sex tape was released. I have seen her tape and again, not sure why she would hang onto that fame.

I have no problem with porn. I have watched porn to write about it here, and also watched for pleasure. No shame at all. I can assure you, with complete certainty, Kim Kardashian’s lack of talent extends into her bedroom. She apparently likes to chew gum while having sex. Additionally, she has mastered the ability to not move during sex. She just stays still, chews her gum, and thinks about what I can only assume is herself, probably naked.

Photo via Instagram/Kim Kardashian

The truth is that I am one of the people who are fascinated by Kim. I watch the Kardashian’s on television, and marvel at their wealth. Never has one family become so wealthy for doing absolutely nothing. The entire family lacks talent. Every single one of them, yet they are millionaires over, and over, and over, again. We can call them talentless, and can also call them simple, but we cannot call them stupid. Fame whores? Yes. Stupid? Not a chance.

In honor of International Women’s Day, Kim posted a picture of herself naked. Everyone went crazy about it because 1) it was an odd thing to share on a day that is meant to empower women, and 2) the picture was a year old and is not how she looks right now. Either way, I don’t really get the shockwave that the photo caused. Kim Kardashian is famous for getting naked, so why the shock that she still likes to be naked? Perhaps she was simply telling women to be brave.

The truth is that if I looked like Kim Kardashian, I would not only post pictures of myself naked, often, I would walk around naked too. I appreciate how her body looks and know that she works hard to look like that. By works hard, of course I mean both physically and financially. Kim is a beautiful woman, and that makes people love her, hate her, and ultimately not understand her. I think she is annoying, but I still watch her on television and follow her on social media.

At the end of the day it is not even Kim that is the most annoying thing about Kim, it is her husband. Kanye West is proving to be a troubled genius who just can’t seem to get it together. Bless him. It is both tragic and hilarious that Kim’s biggest embarrassment is Kanye. If you’ve seen her sex tape you know what a huge statement that is. Kim Kardashian is famous, and naked, and always will be. Time everyone accepted it and moved on to something interesting.

If we suspend what we think we know about her, and look at what she has accomplished, it is hard not to respect her. She took a checkered past, and turned it into gold. She went through infertility and difficult pregnancies, to have two gorgeous children. She’s reinvented herself, while staying the same. Kim Kardashian is a lot of things, including impressive. Strange but true. I don’t know how she got so lucky, but I’m guessing she is keeping the faith.