November 20, 2018

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Week 12 Recap

Typos are generously provided by Jose Cuervo.

It is a massive relief to have caught up on the past three weeks. I posted a blog this afternoon recapping weeks 9, 10, and 11, so I am now back on track. I will not let myself get so behind again because my liver simply cannot handle so many episodes in one sitting. Bless her. It is a chilly night in Los Angeles, so I am snuggled up with my boyfriend Jose Cuervo, and back to blogging. Grab a drink and let’s jump in shall we?

We start with LVP who is buying a condo for Max. LVP is hilarious this season. I’m very happy she is buying Max a home, since she did the same for Pandora. Max is still looking for his biological parents and while I get it, it stresses me out. I cannot imagine how hard that situation is. I wish them all well. Sidebar: I REALLY need to get a dog. Time for me to hit up an animal shelter and adopt a fur ball. It is time and I am ready.

Over to Kyle, she is chatting with Kim, who is waiting for her first grandbaby to be born. I love me some Kim Richards and I think she is ready to come back on the show full time. She needs to replace Rinna. STAT. We are going to go back and forth between Kyle and Kim, and Rinna and Eden. Oy vey. Rinna is a miserable twat and she needs to get canned. Enough with her bullshit already. She is toxic and painfully unappealing.

Rinna is out for blood and Eden has no idea. Meanwhile Kyle is telling Kim what Rinna said. Rinna is berating Eden, and Kim is floored by the bullshit. I think it is good Kyle is telling Kim, because it gives Kim a chance to speak for herself. As for Rinna, shut the fuck up already. Rinna is hanging onto her delusion and it is hilarious. Kyle wants to know the truth, and we know the truth, so this should be entertaining on an epic level.

Sidebar: I would like to be trapped in Erika Girardi’s body for a little while. I would touch myself, look at myself, photograph myself, and walk around naked. I’ll take a day, but would prefer forever. Just saying. Rinna is getting a Humanitarian Award and while I love the charity honoring her, I could not possibly care any less about this. She has no storyline, never has, and is sucking the joy out of this group of women.

Eileen still has diarrhea. Thanks for sharing. The group is volunteering at Project Angel Food, and some of them seem to have forgotten that this is actually important work. Dorit is as crude as her husband. Kyle is working with Eden, and in the end I feel sad for Eden and hope the truth comes out. Kyle is actually quite kind, all things considered. I like Kyle and LVP this season, which is unusual for me. Bravo ladies.

I am finding Rinna’s lies to be fascinating. She is digging her own grave and if they don’t push her in it at the end of the season it will be a shame. Fire her. Back to LVP, she is decorating Max’s condo. I cannot wait to see the finished product. I love LVP this season and that is crazy to say. She has never been this likable and I am finding her to be simply fabulous. Rumor has it she may leave, and if she does, I will follow to her new show.

Eden is visiting at Dorit’s house. Dorit’s son does not speak well, but she understands everything he says and it is beautiful. She is a lovely mommy.  Eden looks and sounds like Brandi to me. She actually looks younger than Brandi, and is sober, so they are actually nothing alike, but look similar. Eden is ready to hash everything out with the group and Dorit seems to have her back. I hope that is not fake and negative.

Erika is out for lunch with Tom. I like them together. They seem happy and comfortable. That said, none of my business. Kyle is plugging her show. Ugh. I think this show is odd and I would be more into it if all three sisters were involved. Blah, blah, blah. Rinna is getting ready for her award. She is ridiculous. Eileen is still sick and bailing on Rinna’s event. Her only friend is not going. Lucky her husband is finally attending something.

Dorit and Kyle are going to Rinna’s event. Bullshit for Kyle to go. Does anyone else like Kyle’s hair darker? Rinna is really loud. She is also really stupid. Rinna thinks LVP didn’t come because it wasn’t about her. Um, no. LVP didn’t come because she was busy, and you’re a twat Rinna. Eden is being catfished, and has no problem telling everyone about it. Bless her. Eden is a sweet girl. By sweet of course I mean harmless and odd.

And just like that it’s over.  What a painfully dull ending. Looks like next week will be what we were waiting for this week. Hopefully we won’t have to wait for the last five minutes to get something good, but whatever. I will be here to watch, drink, blog, drink, and keep it real.