June 17, 2019

Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion Recap Part 2

Typos are lovingly brought to you by Jose Cuervo.

I waited a couple of days to blog part 2 of the reunion because I know that once I do the ladies are gone for a long while. I have enjoyed this season and am sad to see them go. I seriously hope that Jac does not return. Maybe then Dolores can get a storyline and Siggy can stop talking about how much Jac loves Teresa. There were some broken records this season but I loved watching and blogging.

We pick up with everyone having retreated to their dressing rooms. Chris is supporting his pathetic wife because she has his balls in her purse, and Teresa is confirming that she has a gut feeling that Jac was involved in turning her into the federal government. It sounds insane of course, but I am with Teresa on this one. I think Jac absolutely could have had a hand on it. Sidebar: I love having Melissa on Team Teresa.

Joe Gorga and Chris Laurita join and it is weird to have them behind when there was room on the couch. Andy is still in shock that Teresa made the accusation about Jac and Teresa confirms she believes Jac knew. Jac denies and everyone has an opinion. Andy asks Siggy and Dolores if they believe Jac was involved. Siggy says she never saw Jac do anything. She’s only known her for 2 1/2 years.

Poor Siggy. Her kind heart has affected her sight. Bless her. Dolores also doesn't have knowledge of Jac doing bad things, but even if they did why would they admit it here? Andy turns to Chris who says he knows everything that happened. Dear Lord. He is as delusional as his wife. He tells a story about a guy and a call and passing messages and it all makes him sound involved and shady.

Melissa is now going off on Jac, telling Dolores and Siggy that she is a horrible friend and they should run for the hills. I find Jac’s injections to be distracting. Everyone is yelling over each other and it is impossible to understand them. Jac, Melissa, and Teresa are screaming and Teresa points out Jac is on Xanax and I’ve got $20 that says is true. For Jac to not be crying is a clear indication she’s medicated.

She may also not have any tear ducts left after all the shit she puts in her face. Chris is still talking. Dear Lord. Chris is talking about how all Jac wanted was to get people together and Joe says all this stuff is petty when he’s got sp much stuff going on within in own family. He was crushed by the falling out with his family, not his friends. This is stupid and Chris and Joe can go now as they aren’t housewives.

We come back from break to have Joe sitting on the couch and Chris has left. We take a look at Teresa’s interesting grasp of the English language. She is hilarious. Jac tries to say something nice, Andy makes her say it out loud, which is cute of Andy and pathetic of Jac. Joe says nothing will ever break him apart form his sister again. Teresa says she’d prefer Juicy talking shit behind her back than to her face. Oy vey.

Flashback to Teresa coming home from prison. One can only hope Juicy comes out of prison as changed as Teresa is. Teresa has paid off what she owed to the government and even though she’d like to sell her house, she is working to stay there so her kids don’t have to move. I say sell it. She says she met good women in prison and even uses the word prison, which she hasn’t before. 

Teresa says she took responsibility for what she did, but does not feel she did anything wrong. She acknowledges she signed the falsified papers but feels the people who filled out the papers should have done time too.  That would be Juicy. Teresa says her kids are doing fine and they see Juicy every week. She also says he does not believe Juicy cheated and if he did, where is the proof.  She is right about that.

If someone were banging Juicy there would be a video. Everyone is looking for 15 minutes and there would be women selling that shit to The Enquirer. Joe says she spends a lot of time with Teresa’s girls and Gia is doing great. She has a boyfriend and is a very together young woman. Andy asks Teresa about Juicy being deported but she doesn’t want to put it into the universe by talking about it. 

We come back from break and Chris is back. Oh. My. God. Who cares? Maybe Jac needs back up because she is so high. Teresa talks about Rosie and Kathy and her not wanting to be involved with them. Jac has an opinion, which she shouldn’t. Siggy is talking about Jac being loving, and I just can’t. Siggy needs to stop. Seriously, stop. Jac needs to focus on her kids and her grandson and get the hell off this show.

Melissa says she and Kathy pulling away from each other had nothing to do with Teresa.  Important to note that Kathy and Rosie did not reach out to Teresa the entire time she was in prison. They are fame whores and when Teresa got out they scrambled to get back on TV. Ugh. Those two are hideous. We then get a review of the Vermont trip and Chris is speaking for Jac. I want to smack this guy. Really hard.

Siggy is talking for Jac again. This is not a relationship show! Jac is going on about Melissa and Teresa being professional liars and Teresa says not only is Jac a wolf in lambs clothing, but the wolf has rabies. Andy tells her it is sheep’s clothing and I freaking love this show. Jac calls Teresa dumb and a moron and we are reminded we are dealing an emotionally stunted woman. Poor thing.

Talk turns to Jac and Melissa falling apart when Teresa got home. Melissa says Jac became paranoid and Jac says Melissa tried to put all her shit on her. Chris says it was Joe and Melissa who tried to make Chris and Jac hate Teresa. Melissa says Jac unraveled at her own doing. I’m guessing Melissa is right, but so is Jac. It was a perfect storm of desperation and fear that broke these Jac and Melissa apart.

Siggy talks about her scripted lunch, which was silly. Jac came with an attitude and it was her fault it ended like it did. Jac says she and Teresa won't be friends but should be civil when they're together. How about just never be together? If Jac is off the show everyone will good to go. Is Chris really talking for Jac again? Is he seriously trying to explain how loving she is? Oh. My. God. Make it stop.

They flashback to Teresa and Jac’s relationship and even I forgot how close they once were. Teresa says she will always have a place in her heart for Nicholas and Jac wipes fake tears saying she will of course take responsibility for her wrong doings in terms of Teresa. (Not really) Teresa reluctantly says the same but we know she doesn’t mean it. These two are broken and it needs to end. Enough.

Jac cries about Nic and I am somehow not moved by it. Everyone is emotional thinking about their own and being good moms, acknowledging Jac’s daily life as a mom is different. Siggy starts crying that it would mean a lot to her if everyone gave each other a hug. Oy vey. Bless Siggy. She really does mean well. There is a group hug and Andy’s reaction is the best part. Count on Andy to keep it real.