Please Pass the Crickets – A poem for Shemini

I

and the glory of God appeared to all the people.
          -Leviticus 9:23

And who wouldn’t want to bring
a housewarming gift to Israel’s newest resident?
God is coming to the Tabernacle.

And it’s not just a stop-by.
He’s moving in (or she if you prefer.)
So before you show up to welcome the One

to the neighborhood, stop by the florist
or perhaps the Kosher butcher as God
is a big fan of animal parts – innards

fat and blood. Or maybe make a trip to
Venice Beach where they sell a million kinds
of incense at tables that stretch for miles.

But make sure to only buy from
incense sellers with a Heschsher
as the wrong kind of incense

will get you burst into flames.
Just ask Aaron’s sons Nadab and Abihu
who no longer exist.

II

These are the creatures that you may eat
among all the animals on earth
          –Leviticus 11:2

Newsflash: Some insects are Kosher
including four different types of locusts!
Lookout Oaxacan, Kosher is coming for you.

This is the dinner party you’ll
never attend in Pico Robertson.
Brooklyn, maybe.

This is the dinner party the
Jewish survivalists have been waiting for!
Jiminy Cricket,

I’m so sorry,
you’re on the menu!
Flipper get’s a reprieve.

I remember once my mother
tried to feed me dolphin.
We were living in Florida and

Flipper was still on the TV.
This is the same woman who
made me go to Hebrew School.

I refused to eat it.
How could I know she was just
doing the work of the Lord?

III

My mother, like God
despite my resistance
a consistent presence
in my tent.