The Real Housewives of New Jersey – Danielle is a Lesbian Now?

The show starts off with a new opening, which does not include Dina.  In the back of my mind, I thought she would still be around every once and a while, but it’s not happening.  She is out, life goes on, and the other ladies, all but Danielle of course, are not too happy about it.

Danielle is meeting with a plastic surgeon to get her breasts repaired.  She has damage from so many implant surgeries, and is going to have them taken out, and new ones put back in.  She can’t take care of her house, or buy her kids new clothes, but she can get her boobs done?

She talks a lot about how she does not feel sexy, and she needs her breasts done in order to feel good about herself.  Was she uncomfortable when she was sending movies of herself by cell phone to Steve?  This chick is crazy and I’m not buying it.  She is selfish, and her life is all about her.

Lauren is in beauty school, and Caroline goes to visit her in class.  She is watching Lauren work on a client,  and she starts crying because she is so proud of her.  Of all the housewives, of all the cities, Caroline is my favorite.  I love this woman, and respect her as a mother.

Chris and Jacqueline are waiting for Ashley to come home for a “talk”.  Interesting that Chris is so present on the show this season, when we never really saw him too much before.  I like him.  He is tough, and clearly loves his family.  I like it when he tries to get all Soprano around Derek.

Ashley tells her parents she misses home, and wants to move back.  They explain she is always welcome there, as long as she follows their rules.  They are firm, but flexible, and Ashley is moving back in.  I like these people.  They are real, and it’s good Chris is a bigger part of the show.

Teresa is planning her house warming party, and guess who the event planner is?  Elvira.  She is the woman who threw the JCC luncheon for Bethenny on the Real Housewives of New York City.  What’s with all the cross over between New York and New Jersey?  I don’t like it.

I thought Bethenny was a bitch to this woman, but now that we really get to meet her, and see what she is all about, I can’t stand her.  She is obnoxious, and rude.  I find her annoying, and if they are introducing us to her on both shows because she is coming on next year, we don’t want her.

She is so JAPpy, that I find it difficult to even listen to her voice.  She is bagging on Teresa for not having help, and says she will die if she does not get a housekeeper, and a nanny.  Teresa calls herself old school, and says she likes to do it herself, which Elvira does not get.

Best part is after she has toured Elvira through the house, Teresa is ready to get her out.  Elvira is still talking on the front stoop, when Teresa just talks over her, says thank you, and shuts the door in her face.  It was hilarious, and completely understandable.

Caroline is home and having a talk with Albie, who lets her know he is being asked to leave law school, for not getting the grade required by the school.  He says he has appealed their decision, but they have advised him to find a new career, and law is not the thing for him. 

Caroline gives Albie a speech about not giving up, and not letting anyone tell him what he can do, or what he can be.  She cries, and I found myself crying with her.  It does not matter how old our kids get, they are still our children.  The love and support All and Caroline have for all their children, is admirable. 

Jacqueline and Teresa are out shopping for post baby clothes, and they go to Kim D’s shop.  Kim D is gross.  She is two faced, trying to get on the show as a permanent fixture, and I don’t trust her.  Her boyfriend is a drunk, she is a liar, and I think Bravo is scraping the bottom of the New Jersey barrel.

Danielle is going into surgery.  She tells the doctor nature has been very good to her.  If she were happy with what nature gave her, would she be having her fourth boob job?  Sidebar: If your medical center were going to be on TV, wouldn’t you make sure all the lights in the sign worked?  Tacky.

Teresa is dropping a load of cash on her house warming party.  The party happened before she and Joe filed for bankruptcy.  It’s impossible to believe they did not know, when planning the party, that they would file.  It’s sleazy to spend so much money, when you know you have no intention to pay.

This party is over the top.  Such a complete and total waste of money.  It’s all for show, and while I get the desire to show off your house, she has changed the house so no none can see how it really looks.  I love Teresa, but this party is embarrassing.

Danielle is out of surgery, and all went well.  She is home with her kids, and it’s just weird to me.  Seeing her with her kids is off putting for some reason.  Danielle says the boob job symbolizes a new beginning for her.  Does she mean a new career in porn?  This chick is offensive.

It’s party time, and it’s ridiculous.  Teresa gives a speech to welcome her guests.  She invites Caroline and Jacqueline up, because they are her friends, and she wants to thank them.  Then, out of nowhere, drunk Kim D. goes up, in the middle of the speech, and starts talking to Teresa.

It’s hilarious.  She is just talking to Teresa, telling her how happy she is to be there, and what a great party it is, right in the middle of Teresa’s moment.  She is hammered.  Caroline is mortified, Jacqueline is laughing, and Tesesa is to dealing with a drunk, without making it too much of a scene. 

Kim G. is talking to Ashley about Danielle, and Caroline shuts it down.  She lets everyone know to not talk about Danielle at all, because it’s Teresa’s night.  Caroline is a lady, and Kim G. and Kim D and drunk, horrible skanks.  Bravo has taken this great show, and turned it into an ugly mess.

In the beginning, the ladies were interesting.  They were wealthy, but living lives just like ours, and it was a look in a window that was fascinating.  It’s now a bunch of chicks that we don’t care about, would never hang with, and are disgusting.  Bravo has ruined this show, and kudos to Dina for bailing.

On Watch What Happens Live, Danielle was Andy Cohen’s guest.  First, there is no way in hell that this woman has not has major work done on her face.  She denies it, but come on!  She has been nipped, tucked, and shot up so much that it looks like she is wearing a mask.

Danielle tells Andy she has not watched the sex tape that is out of her.  Seriously?  She has totally watched it.  I bet she also sold it.  She is so condescending and gross.  She is rude to all the callers, all the questions are answered with total snarkiness.  She also can’t speak English.

Danielle says she has never hooked up with Danny.  Does she think we are stupid?  She says she is not pushing her kids.  Okay.  She says she does not know why she is unable to use the words “woman” and “women” properly in a sentence.  You cannot believe anything that this woman says.

Danielle says Kelly and Jill are two of the sweetest women she has ever met.  Interesting that the two other housewives she singles out, are the whack jobs from NYC.  Best moment was when Ramona tweeted Andy to tell him Danielle was a liar.  Loved it.

The show ends with Danielle singing a song with her new lesbian lover, Lori Michaels.  The most shocking thing is not that Danielle is now possibly a lesbian, but that she can actually sing.  The song is beautiful, and the songwriter looks like Danielle, which is probably why she is attracted to her. 

Danielle is scary.  I seriously have to question Bravo for the choices they are making.  People get fired all the time, so fire some of these chicks already.  Not sure how much longer I can watch New Jersey.  This season might be it for me.  There is no hope for Danielle, so for her kids, I’m keeping the faith.