I love babies and think they are glorious. I spent yesterday afternoon with a wonderful friend and her delicious baby. This particular child is stunning. (I’m making spitting sounds here as is required when speaking of the beauty of a baby.) He should be in the picture business. He is so well tempered and happy that when I held him I could actually feel my ovaries convulsing and begging me to have another baby.
My ovaries were yelling, “Have another one!” as I watched my friend unpack her car. There is a stroller, a bag the size of a piece of carry on luggage and her purse. Then, just when you think you’ve got it all ready to go, you need to grab the baby. I swear I had forgotten exactly what is involved when you are transporting a baby anywhere.
We went into the restaurant for lunch and the unpacking began. The high chair, the bottle, the formula, the lunch containers of homemade pasta, meat and vegetables, the toys, the bibs, and the wipes. I held the baby and smooched him as we played while his momma got all situated. She is a pro. Nothing threw her off her game and she did it all without skipping a beat in the conversation. I was in awe of my friend and the baby.
I always thought I would have a lot of kids. When I was a little girl I was certain I would have 5. I feel blessed to have my son and be a mother and I would not change a thing. That said, my son was so young when I left his dad that I have never experienced the joy of raising a child with a loving partner. Now I’m sure that a lot of my friends, when speaking of their fabulous husbands whom they love, would say that in terms of the baby they are useless. Still, there is a different dynamic to having a useless man in the next room as opposed to having one a few miles away.
As a single woman who is creeping up on 44 it’s sad to come to terms with the fact that I will probably not have another baby. Even though I was not planning on having another one, the knowledge that I actually won’t is hard. If I met my Beshert in the next year and then decided to have a baby I would be 45 before I gave birth and that is just not appealing. For me, the thought of filling out college applications and changing diapers at the same time is just not that sexy. When my ovaries start yelling at me again I will go visit my friend and her delicious boy until they calm down.
I’m a fabulous mother. It is the greatest job I have ever had and one that I excel at. As much of a rock star mom that I am, I will be an even better Grandma. My son went from a newborn to his Bar Mitzvah in the blink of an eye so before I know it he will be living across the street with his wife and kids and I will have his babies to take care of and by in the blink of an eye of course I mean it will be at least 20 years before he has a wife and kids. The best part will be that when there are fits of crying, projectile vomiting and diarrhea I can simply walk them home.
To all the parents God bless you. To those who are taking care of children with special needs you have my admiration and respect. To those who are pregnant and awaiting the birth of their babies I wish you an easy delivery and healthy babies. To those who are trying to have babies you are in my prayers and I wish for you all that you wish for yourselves. Hold onto your dreams, love your kids and keep the faith.