Dancing With The Stars – Broadway Week – UPDATE

I love this show.  Truly love it. It is because I love it so much that I am annoyed that Brooke Burke Charvet is ruining it.  Her voice is annoying, her questions are ridiculous, and she does not need to be there.  Tom could totally do this show by himself.  The contestants can get their scores standing on the dance floor with Tom, instead of going upstairs to talk to the robot.  Seriously, enough already.  Fire her.

The show starts with the cast of Sister Act and they are fabulous.  I can’t help but be a little sad that Carson is not dancing, as he would have done something really great.  Watching him cheer everyone is bittersweet and you know he wishes it was him and not Rob Kardashian, who is not a star, but simply the boring brother of a porn star and her sisters.  His mom comes by to say hello, and tell him she is proud of him.

Rob does okay, but I don’t really care about him so it’s not that big a deal.  I know dancing is the goal, but I find myself pulling for the best entertainer more than the best dancer, and Rob is not entertaining.  The most interesting thing about Rob Kardashian is that he has the same bottom as his sister Kim, and seeing it on a man is fascinating.  He copies Kim, so next step should be porn right?  Why is this kid here?

Nancy Grace is next and she’s such a bitch.  I really like her, love that she is donating her fee to charity, but she has been mean to Tristan from the very first day and it’s just not cute.  She is there because people love her on her own show, which is great, but she is her own worst enemy and I am no longer voting for her because she is rude.  She’s trying, and God bless her, but I’m over her.  That said, I don’t think she’s going home this week.

David Arquette is adorable.  I like him so much, and really want him to do well.  He danced to Grease and I loved it.  I dig how his family cheers him on, and I loved his spot on Travolta impersonation.  I hope he’s in the finals because I think his freestyle will be crazy good.  I’m voting for him tonight because he’s entertaining, and dancing well. I think he’s earned a shot at greatness, which he has not yet hit, but is very close to.

Ricki is up and I must say that I’m disappointed she did not dance to Hairspray.  I know it would have been an unfair advantage, but it would also have been really fabulous.  She did the quickstep, which is my favorite dance, and she was phenomenal.  She looked beautiful and there was nothing wrong with her performance.  The judges agreed because she got a standing ovation and a score of 29.  Bravo Ricki.

Chaz Bono was the Phantom of the Opera and while the judges did not dig it, I really liked it.  I like Chaz so much and totally get that he is not the best dancer, but he is trying so hard.  If it was about dancing only, then he would be going home.  If it’s about personality, then Nancy or Hope will go home.  I really hope it’s Hope because Nancy bitching is fun to write about, but I don’t care about Hope and think she is a wet noodle.

Speaking of Hope, she is next and in her taped package she is crying and pulling the sympathy card.  Whatever.  Her dance sucked and she needs to go home.  She is not the worst dancer there, but she is the least entertaining. I would rather watch Rob than Hope.  She is sweet, a great soccer player, but she looks like a tranny, has no rhythm, and needs to go home.  My prediction for Broadway week is that Hope is voted off.

Sidebar:  Maks is an asshole.  He made a fool out of himself last night and was a baby.  This is not “his show”, and Len should not retire.  Maks needs a ego check and to criticize the judges for being “judgmental” is ridiculous.  As for Bruno calling Chaz a penguin, seriously?  I leave the judges alone on this show but perhaps it’s time to start brining Bruno into the blog.  Hard to know who was the bigger Douchelord this week, Maks or Bruno, but my vote goes to Maks.

JR Martinez danced last and he was perfect.  I simply love this man and have now decided that not only should he win, but he will.  He is entertaining, a brilliant dancer, a wonderful personality, a hero, a mensch, and deliciously handsome.  This is his competition to win or lose.  His quick step was flawless and I don’t mind telling you that sitting in my living room, I gave him a standing ovation.  JR is going to be the winner.

Kristin Chenoweth was spectacular and her number was terrific, but if I see that blonde troupe dancer whip her hair into her partner’s face one more time I am going to scream.  I want to walk up to her on the street and cut her hair.  It’s disgusting.  It’s group dance time with Carson as the creative director and he is fab.  Carson Kressley is delicious and I freaking love him. The group dance is very good and was a fun segment.

I liked this week’s show and it will be interesting to see what happens on the elimination show.  I really think Hope needs to go this week.  She is boring and not fun to watch.  It’s getting down to the wire and after tonight we will have only 6 celebrities left.  If they fire Brooke, and get that blonde troupe dancer to cut her hair, this show would get a 10 from me.  I will update tonight after we find out if America is keeping it real.

Chaz Bono was eliminated tonight and it was sad.  I truly feet that Hope should have gone, and Maks had bis crybaby moment because he knew she was going if he didn’t get all dramatic.  I hope Hope goes next week.  Chaz was lovely and entertaining.  I truly believe his being on this show made a difference.  He will be missed and his parting words to Tom Bergeron were: “I came on to this show because I wanted to show American a different kind of man. I know that if there was somebody like me on TV when I was growing up, my whole life would have been different. So I dedicate everything I did to all the people out there like me, especially the kids and teens who are struggling. You can have a wonderful great life and be successful and happy.”

Bravo Chaz.