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February 15, 2012

There was a time in my life when Valentine’s Day really mattered to me.  Now that I’m in love and in the best relationship I’ve ever been in, I keep forgetting about it.  In fact, I accidentally made plans with a girlfriend last week to get together tonight not remembering what today was or that both our boyfriends had made plans for us. 

When I was single, the day could be painful.  Wishing for love and wondering if it would ever come.  In other relationships, I tried not to expect anything but hoped for something amazing.  Or at least hoped he had remembered to make dinner reservations in advance.  Flowers on Valentine’s Day seemed to mean so much when I was in a relationship where I constantly felt under-appreciated or even ignored.  And when today would come, and he’d call in the morning to say what do you want to do later, I’d feel disappointed and bite my tongue.

But in my current relationship, where my house is still filled with orchids my boyfriend sent months ago just because and he remembered weeks ago to get an 8 o clock reservation at a restaurant I told him I wanted to try, tonight doesn’t seem to mean much.  In fact, we decided to cancel the reservations and go see a special screening of a sexy burlesque documentary downtown.  We go to great restaurants pretty often and my boyfriend does so much to show he appreciates me on a regular basis that I’d rather skip the manufactured romance of tonight.  I convinced him that we’ll get better food if we go to the restaurant on a night where they’re not desperate to turn the tables (once a waitress, always a waitress).

But just to get in the spirit, I did stop by his apartment at 6 this morning to bring him some Valentine’s Day cookies. ” title=”a nod to some of my favorite Valentines from none other than NPR.” target=”_blank”> a nod to some of my favorite Valentines from none other than NPR.


Tamara Shayne Kagel is a writer living in Santa Monica, CA. To find out more about her, visit” title=”@tamaraskagel.” target=”_blank”>@tamaraskagel. © Copyright 2011.

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