Mob Wives – RECAP

I cannot get enough of this show.  I watch these women with equals parts fear, fascination, horror and joy.  These chicks are good television.  I find that I have an attitude when I watch them.  My tweets even get aggressive which is hilarious.  Watching these women will give you balls.  They are both empowering and mortifying.

We start this week with Ramona and Karen talking about Ramona and her boyfriend getting arrested.  I just don’t get them and Karen is annoying to me.  I think she thinks up things to say when she is home alone, then decides they are cool, and says them on the show.  Only problem is they are not cool, and she sounds fake.

It’s time for some Big Ang, who is perfection.  Carla and Drita go to her bar for a drink and we learn a little about this fascinating woman.  Drita calls her the “Godmother” of all the women and I love that.  She is big and tough, and nurturing to all the women.  She’s like the mommy figure and I love her.  She is also a real life mom.

Her son AJ gets into a car accident and she is stressed out.  He is 23, getting into trouble, and trying to find his way.  She is a sweet lady and I imagine has seen a lot of stuff in her life.  As an audience, we are united in our love for her and want her to be happy.  This is a woman we would never meet in real life, but all want to be friends with.

Karen is meeting Renee for a drink and I can’t take it.  She is trying to sound hardass, but she sounds like a bad actress who is trying to be as cool as the others are naturally.  Renee tells Karen she has made peace with Carla, but Karen is a troublemaker in that as soon as Renee told her they were good, Karen reminds her Carla never came to the hospital.

Renee is trying to make things nice for everyone but here’s the thing, it’s never going to happen.  There are two sides on this show and that is what makes it all good.  They came in broken which is real, unlike the housewives who were never together to be broken, and break on their own.  These chicks are the reality in reality television.

Junior is moving back in with Renee and it’s cute.  She is aware of their history, but loves him and is giving it another go.  I like them together and I like her.  She wants her family to have quality time together before Junior goes back to prison.  That is a real statement not a fake TV one.  How great is this show? Soprano’s come to life!

Karen is with Ramona and oddly excited about Ramona’s arrest being in the papers.  She is a fame whore who is trying to recapture the fame of her father and his legacy, but it’s not happening.  Karen giving advice is odd, makes no sense, and Ramona is of no interest.  I have tried to get these two but it’s not happening.  They are boring.

Carla and Drita are meeting with Derrick Tobacco to understand what happened during the fight at Renee’s party.  Drita thinks Karen got in her one good punch when she was being held down, which would make Karen a coward who does not fight fair.  Can you guess the truth here?  Karen got her hit in while Drita was being held by Derrick.

Sidebar:  I love the theme song “The Big Bang” by Rock Mafia, and Drita looks really beautiful this week.  She is a pretty girl, but tonight she looks gorgeous.  We clarify that Ramona stirred up trouble and Karen took a hit while Drita was being held back.  Karen in a “punk” according to Drita and she is not too thrilled about Karen.

Renee and Junior are settling into a routine and Renee is having problems with their son AJ, and wants Junior to step up and be the man of the house. She wants AJ to get himself together, and stop disrespecting her.  AJ has a new girlfriend and she is making him act out and Renee is over it.  Junior says there is no winning when there is a girl involved.

Big Ang is having lunch with her son AJ and she is freaking awesome.  Her son is cute, no real direction, but cute.  He asks his mom how her love life is and she tells him she has a new guy, who just got out of prison after serving 28 years for murder, to which AJ responds that does not make him a bad guy.  Dear Lord this show is good.

Big Ang talks to him with a baby voice, and is just cute.  She is a broad and I want to be friends with her.  I like her relationship with her son and think it’s important to see them as mothers.  It’s puts a different spin on this show and these women which is great.  Big Ang is getting a puppy and I swear to God, I want her to be my neighbor.

Carla goes to a fashion show with Etty the jeweler, and we learn she wants her own fashion line.  I’m skipping over this.  Dear Lord. I’m not interested in a fashion line by Carla.  I am however going to buy Drita’s lipstick, and it was determined on Twitter today that Drita should also sell bejeweled wrenches. I would buy one of those for sure.

Renee is having Karen and Ramona, along with their kids, over for dinner. Renee is hilarious, pointing out they all wear a Rolex, but are late for everything.  Renee is not into her kid being rude and will not stand for the disrespect.  If it’s the girl that is causing it, she’s got to go.  She is struggling with dealing with Junior.

It’s just too funny.  She is grossed out by Junior being a slob, and her reaction to crumbs being left around the house, and leaving the TV on, are priceless.  Renee is a good egg and for the record, crumbs would put me over the edge.  Ramona is funny when she points out that Renee is finding crumbs not condoms, and she needs to chill.

Renee is screaming her head off, cussing up a storm, the kids laugh at her, and she goes in and yells at them too.  The facial reaction of one of the kids is perfect.  Renee is losing her mind over the crumbs and I’m thinking my beloved Renee might need a Xanax.  Her reaction is weird and seems out of sync so it may be a bad editing choice.

Carla and Drita are working out and their bodies are showing all their hard work.  They look good.  I’m loving Drita this week and even think Carla is good.  I gave her a hard time last week but given a chance, she could be good.  Ramona and Karen are never going to win me over, but Carla is on her way. She’s no Big Ang, but she’s okay.

Sides are being taken and Carla has Drita’s back, while Lucifer, otherwise known as Ramona, is on team Karen.  Something is going to blow with these chicks and God willing the cameras will be rolling.  I am a solid card carrying member of Team Drita.  Meanwhile Karen calls Carla and invites her out for dinner. Stop looking into the camera Karen!

Carla meets Karen who is just weird.  Carla is trying to be nice, but Karen is looking to pick a fight.  She tells Carla that she hated her all summer and it’s so stupid.  She is badmouthing her friend, talking about being a soldier, and all of a sudden it’s a bad 1940’s gangster movie.  Karen is lame.  Carla is calm, but Karen is just pushing a fight.

Karen is not listening to anything Carla is saying, she is just making it about Drita.  Carla is laughing at the absurdity of it all, and gets up to leave.  Karen is being a hard ass and trying to be tough, but she just looks like an animal. Carla bails and Karen tells her to come back.  Karen is still talking, not listening, and Karen is about to throw blows.

Karen says she invited her to dinner because she likes her, but she just said she hated her.  What is it Karen?  At one point Carla looks in the camera with a look of “are you seeing this crazy person?”  It’s funny.  Carla should not have gone to meet Karen in the end.  They are not friends and if she is going to be loyal to Drita, then don’t go.

I love this show and have figured out that if Renee, Drita or BigAng are on the screen, sit down and watch.  If Carla is on, keep the volume on, but I can walk around, and if Ramona and Karen are on, I can go do the laundry or empty the dishwasher.  This is a brilliant show and I am hooked.  These Real Housewives of Staten Island are keeping it real.