Chris Christie Trumps Real Housewives of New Jersey

Tonight's typos are sponsored by Grey Goose.

I love blogging the Real Housewives of New Jersey.  They are entertaining and even when the storyline is dark and upsetting, they are still good TV. Usually.  I have interviewed them, interacted with them on Twitter, made them laugh, and pissed them off.  They are a fun group if nothing else. There are a lot of celebrities from New Jersey.  I don’t think of the Real Housewives participants as celebrities, as much as women who are enjoying some celebrity.  They are pop culture phenomenons, especially the Jersey girls, but today they were trumped when I encountered a real NJ Celebrity.

I received a Tweet from Governor Chris Christie today and it was amazing. Not only did he Tweet, but when I responded, so did he.  I love this guy.  If he were not married, Jewish, and a Democrat, I would totally want to marry him.  I’ve only been to Jersey once but I love her and her people. To Governor Christie, you are a remarkable man and have made me care about your state and her people. You are kind, smart, and generous of spirit to those you know, and those you will never meet. To my Twitter follower @allabouttrhwfan, you are the heart of New Jersey and I love you. Stay strong.

Enough with the lovefest for the divine Mr. Christie, it is time for the ladies of New Jersey.  We pick up this week at the meeting of Jac and Teresa. Teresa is asking Jac to explain herself, but Jac is struggling, clearly because she is medicated.  She didn’t even order a drink, a clear sign she is on meds. She is always drinking, so for her to pass, is interesting.  Jac is crying about how hard her life is taking care of her son.  I mean no disrespect but come on. The camera keeps going back and forth between Jac and Tre, and Juicy and Chris.  The men are mature, the women not.

I always get called out for loving Teresa, but seriously people, Tre is trying and Jac is disgusting.  They agree to be civil,  go to see the men, then Jac has a drink having clearly forgotten she popped some Vicodin earlier.  Jac apologizes to Juicy, who could not care any less. We head over to Christopher, Chris, and Albie, who are still talking about Blk., which nobody drinks. Chris is worried the boys will focus on the restaurant, and not Blk.  Dear Lord.  They need to walk away from the ass juice and focus on the restaurant.  Or maybe just get real jobs.

Kathy is shopping with Jac, the only way for her to get camera time, and Jac tells her she is having a tummy tuck in Beverly Hills.  I am sick of everyone talking about how hard Jac’s life is.  If she lived in a small apartment and didn’t have a husband I’d perhaps be more sympathetic. She’s spoiled. Jac says she is also having a neck lift. Is that code for neck installation? The woman has no neck, just a head on shoulders, so a neck lift is a waste of money.  Back to Tre, Joe is there to pick up Gia.  The mending of this family is sweet and it makes me happy. Hope is keeps.

Gia and Joe are having a great time together, but we watch a lot of time filler before we get to the chat. Joe is adorable, Gia is almost as tall as he is, and I feel bad for her as she is clearly a little uncomfortable. Gia is stunning and wise beyond her years.  I love this young woman, who is articulate and defending her mother while Joe tells her she should not listen to others talking crap about him.  Really?  He is in over his head and not sure how to respond to Gia’s honesty. In the end he is lovely, Gia is wonderful, and I am crying.  Damn this show!

Everyone is going to Teresa’s house and they are travelling by bus to a fundraising event.  When I say everyone, I mean everyone.  It is very sweet. Kathy is mumbling but I zone her out. I don’t get why everyone has kids there but CJ is not.  She says he needs special time, but he’s not there. Teresa can’t let go of being called a sociopath, so she Googles the meaning, but does not really respond so I’m not sure she understood the meaning. Bless her.  Milania climbs the stripper pole on the bus and calls herself Melissa. When they are getting along this is an awesome group.

Everyone is doing Zumba and it is hilarious.   Jac doesn’t want to do it because she “can’t dance”. Translation: She is a sloth who does not move quickly.  I am amazed by the amount of makeup. Lashes for Zumba?  Really?  Jac is annoying, fake, and dumb. For reasons I do not understand, Caroline is having a farewell dinner party for Greg because he is moving to San Francisco.  Who even remembers this guy, and why is she crying like a crazy person?  Everyone was invited but Tre and Joe. Enough about Greg, they are talking about Jac’s surgery.

Jac is told by the doctor not to drink, so she has shots of tequila.  She is with her daughter and parents, and acting like an idiot.  I mean acting like herself, an idiot. Back is Jersey, CJ is sick and Chris calls Caroline over to help him.  Jac’s dad talking about her surgery is disturbing.  Ugh. Jac is in surgery and even her doctor thinks Jac is trying to look like Ashley. Jac is in full makeup in the recovery room.  Hilarious.  Next week looks like it will be good.  The truth is that even when bad, it is good.  My name is Ilana and I am addicted to RHONJ. Blogging and keeping it real