LeAnn & Eddie Episode 1 Recap

I’m not sure who was looking forward to this show more, LeAnn Rimes fans or haters. Since her “fans” get paid to blow up social media with how fabulous she is, maybe it’s them. Word on the street is if you tweet positive things 100 times she’ll buy you a pack of smokes. In her ongoing effort of becoming Brandi Glanville, Rimes has a reality show.

Both LeAnn and VH1 tweeted me to blog this show. Sweet of them to want my opinion. I get lots of hate from LeAnn and her personalities for being mean to her. The truth is I don't make things up about her, simply comment on what she does and says. My blog is about what she gives us. I'm just doing my job so call off the minions.

Though I cannot figure out why, VH1 decided to release the show online one week before the scheduled television premier. By cannot figure it out of course I mean this show is truly bad and VH1 figures it can blame low ratings on everyone watching it online. I believe people will watch it, but whatever the reason, it is here, it is boring, and this is my take.

From the first frame you're immediately struck by how unhappy Eddie looks, and how LeAnn is not photogenic. The camera is unkind to her, and he appears to be unkind to himself. I've seen Eddie in person and he was gorgeous. Not so much anymore. He's still good looking, but compared to how he used to look, he is not weathering well.

We start with Eddie pointing out how successful his wife is, yet the footage and accolades are from when she was a child. She was a really big deal a really long time ago. Her success now is comparable to Barry Williams performing Brady Bunch songs in Branson, Missouri, not Carrie Underwood's level of country music success.

Within one minute of the show they are showing pictures of Eddie’s kids with Brandi. Important to note Eddie went nuts stopping Brandi from showing her kids on her show, yet here they are, in photographs as one big happy family. Not cool. They go on to say their relationship didn’t start off the way we wanted it to. What exactly does that mean?

Were they hoping to carry on their affair privately, divorce, then go public? Either way they both cheated, were both married, his wife was pregnant, and are now using their past to carve out another 15 minutes of fame. It is odd to me they are holding onto their history so tightly, rather than forge ahead and build a future. It is quite sad really.

They try to be lighthearted about the tabloids, and are trying to sell the show as a comedy, but their truth is not funny and they're not good enough thespians to make this work. Eddie looks awkward and uncomfortable about doing the show, which is clearly LeAnn’s thing, but mostly what you notice is that there is no chemistry between them. 

They are on their way to a movie premier. Eddie says he stared in a film when he actually only had a few lines. They get a fake text from Brandi, which allows them to talk about her and have a little tiff. LeAnn wants Eddie to use his premier to talk about what a liar his ex-wife is, and Eddie is not willing to talk about it at all. Except for here of course.

I am convinced the limo ride was shot AFTER the premier. The paparazzi on the red carpet are screaming for Eddie, not LeAnn, and she is on edge. At one point she tried to kiss him and he rebuffed her. It was all over social media, yet Eddie makes a point of saying in the car she should kiss him, he won’t kiss back, and tabloids will run with it.

That picture obviously bothered LeAnn, so they scripted this little car scene so they could talk about Brandi, then set up why the pics looked like he wasn’t into her. The fight was just extra fun for us and clearly not expected by LeAnn. She looks desperate and lonely, and even tells the camera she just wants him to pick her side, which he must not do often.

Time for LeAnn to meet with her music producer Darrell Brown to end her 20 year recording contract. I think Brown is a disgusting pig so we don’t need to talk about him. I will say I don’t believe she would sign this document in a rented conference room without her lawyer, husband, or anyone in her life to mark the occasion, just Brown, her loser hack.

Time for lunch with Eddie’s best friend Dave and his wife Liz. Liz is LeAnn’s best friend. She used to be Brandi’s best friend. Interesting that Eddie has been sleeping with Liz longer than he’s been sleeping with LeAnn. Liz is not meant for TV. Between the lips and the lashes she is classic VH1. LeAnn celebrates her contract ending with a new tattoo.

Sidebar: LeAnn gets a tattoo on her ribcage and does not cry. I have several tattoos, all small, and I cried with each one. They really hurt! She must have a high tolerance for pain. One cannot talk about the tattoo without mentioning Eddie clearly hates tattoos and LeAnn should’ve used Executive Producer power and had them not shoot up her nostrils.

Eddie is out with his trainer. Interesting she lets him do a scene on his own, then you realize he can only be on his own if he is talking about her. Eddie talks about tabloids and the trainer says he needs to speak out in LeAnn’s defense. Really? This show is silly and not based in reality. It is not funny either so I’m not sure what they’re doing.

They're doing a charity skydiving event for a worthy cause and 6 people. She talks about singing the national anthem and you think it’s for a big crowd, but it’s just a small group. Mario Lopez and Extra are there covering it, which is lame. LeAnn is great at getting press coverage. I wonder what she pays paparazzi to follow her around constantly.

Eddie is going to skydive, as is Mario, but LeAnn is not sure she can do it as she is scared. She may just sing. They arrive to the event with LeAnn in the front seat and Eddie in the back, which seems odd. They do their Extra interview squinting into the sun, and Eddie talks about the tabloids being full of crap. LeAnn thinks it is a pledge of love from Eddie to her.

He defended her and she will skydive for him. She sings the National Anthem beautifully. Nice she knew the words since she often struggles with lyrics. They jump and she loves it. I would never do it so bravo LeAnn. She says the jump is a moment of freedom and it is the one time in the whole show she is likable. 3 seconds out of 20 minutes.

After her jump Eddie does not hug or kiss her, just gives a high five. That is sad. In the end this show is more sad than funny.  He looks miserable, she looks desperate, and their cast of characters is unremarkable. In a preview for the season we see there will be a lot of Brandi bashing and LeAnn begging for a baby. No good can come of this.

Sometimes it takes a show a couple episodes to get into a groove and settle into what it is. Maybe it will get better. The problem with that theory is if they continue to just be themselves, it won’t get better. In the end if you are a fan, or don’t know who they are at all, this is just not a good show and I’m just keeping it real.