Real Housewives of New Jersey Part 2 Reunion Recap

For the love of God. We are one minute in and I am already getting a severe lower back pain.  They start off being fun and light, but they are going into the toilet fast and I cannot believe we are still in this place with these people.  Nothing changes. It is dark and at the end of the day none of them like each other and for this show to continue is a waste of our time.  Bravo needs to pull the plug on this crapfest.

Andy sucks at reunions. Sorry, but he does.  He is more concerned with being a star himself than making these people close out the season with some answers to the fans that have made him rich. Andy starts by asking if anyone regrets something they said and it is bull.  There are no real regrets here and the things they all say they regret are things that actually needed to be said. I must chug vodka from the bottle.

They show a tape of a bunch of name-calling and while the kids are entertaining, it is stupid. Caroline is asked about the idiotic things her kids say and that perhaps they are single because they are losers, not busy with work.  Caroline says that is a stupid comment but I agree.  Caroline’s children are not entertaining, offensive, mentally deficient, and in no way, in any lifetime, worthy of their own show.  Ever.

Teresa asks Melissa about her saying Joe cheated and Melissa turns it on Teresa saying she called her a gold digger. Melissa is unwilling to take responsibility for anything she says.  I truly believe Melissa is not mean on purpose, but more because she is truly stupid.  Now stupid is not a nice word, but come on. This woman is dumb, idiotic, selfish, unaware, and unable to tell the truth.  She has singlehandedly ruined this show.

Andy is still asking Juicy about calling Teresa a C years ago.  Shut up already.  Rosie is asked a question about Arizona and Caroline and Kathy try to answer for her.  Caroline likes to talk for everyone and Kathy just wants to talk, seemingly unaware that nobody cares about her opinion.  Rosie says Arizona changed her life.  She quit smoking and started working out. Rosie and Juicy are the only ones being authentic and real.

Juicy calls out Melissa and Joe for being the instigators in all the drama and he is right.  Joe says they were simply defending themselves, which is crap. Joe was defending his stupid wife, not trying to make peace with his sister. Kathy is talking and ruining the reunion.  Someone needs to shut her up. Melissa says Teresa should not have filmed certain things.  What?  They are filming a TV show you dumbass. Melissa should never have been on this show.

Teresa says Melissa and Joe came on the show to ruin her.  Joe says that Teresa had not spoken to him in two years.  Does that not prove the fact that Joe and Melissa came on to punish Teresa?  Joe says he came on to get close to Teresa, which is ridiculous. Joe is bitter and angry and it is sad.  I like this guy but everything he says sounds like his wife.  He is repeating all the things she has coached him to say. I feel horrible for Teresa.

Caroline is talking about Albert’s dad, insisting that he never hit his kids. Not buying it. Sidebar: Caroline not wearing a bra is not a pretty picture. She is asked about her father-in-law being in the mob, but Caroline gets offended and does not answer the question.  She says her and Albert do not want to know about the mob connections. Bull.  She knows. Caroline says her husband never cheated. Oy Vey.  Albert cheated, her name was Jill.

Caroline lets Andy know his questions are of no value and calls him out.  Andy stops, reverses with his tail between his legs, and we move on. He is as kind to Caroline as he is mean to Tersea. Andy talks about Juicy saying he was scared about court, but fails to mention he was talking about the driving issue not indictments.  Andy is a pot stirer.  They have stuff going on.  We know.  Let them be. We will learn the outcome and nothing Andy says will get the info faster.

Jac and Melissa are back peddling on their telling Joe he should go to jail. Convenient.  Regardless of the pending court issues, saying he should go to jail is wrong.  Teresa says she does not believe in karma, and only referenced it because it was a big part of the vocabulary at the Arizona retreat.  I like Teresa and I think the silly things she says do not come from her being mean. Again we are talking about the legal trouble of Juicy. Enough!

Oh. My. God. Now Joe is talking about Juicy and his legal troubles.  I am so sick of everyone pretending to care about this when you know they were all laughing about it at home.  Their concern is fake. I honestly do not think any of them are not gloating privately that they deserve this somehow.  For Joe to imply that Melissa cries for Teresa and Joe is laughable. Melissa cries out of glee.  Andy needs to wrap this up. He is being a complete douche.

Melissa is now fake crying.  Ugh. Andy is trying to get all Barbara Walters on Juicy and I find myself wanting to slap Andy so he snaps out of it.  I might actually hate these people. Why do I even care?  This is scripted television and I should not be this invested in what is obviously non-reality television.  Now Jac is fake crying. Where are the tears of these bitches? Does Botox dry up tear ducts? I can’t take it anymore. Move on Andy!

Caroline is spewing crap and I’m checked out.  This was a waste of our time. Andy asks if anyone has final words and Teresa says she was hurt by Caroline and Caroline jumps all over it.  The entire show is peaceful and Caroline is going to end it by attacking Teresa.  It was Teresa’s question to answer and Caroline is losing her mind.  Caroline is an idiot and her attempt to go into her new show as the calm and peaceful leader is shot to hell.

Melissa chimes in and it is lame.  These people do not like each other and the show needs to end.  Caroline airs all the dirty laundry and says she does not know if Teresa has a good heart and she is done.  We end on hate, which is a slap in the face to everyone who watches. Andy is an ass, Caroline is a bitch, Kathy is invisible, Jac is moronic, Melissa is a dumbass, and Teresa is buried under all the crap.  I hate this show and that is keeping it real.