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Torah portion: How to make teens excited about Judaism

Recently, a mother invited 30 teens, all Jewish day school graduates, to spend Shabbat services and eat lunch at our Chabad center in Bel Air.
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July 29, 2015

Recently, a mother invited 30 teens, all Jewish day school graduates, to spend Shabbat services and eat lunch at our Chabad center in Bel Air. The goal was to give them a look at “traditional” Judaism. 

In typical teen fashion, they gathered outside during services and lunch, and were texting and enjoying each other’s company. I decided that if they were not going to sit with me, I would sit with them. I approached a few teens at a time and asked, “May I speak with you for three minutes?” They rolled their eyes, but agreed.

We all sat in a semicircle and I asked, “Do you love food?” They all laughed and said, “Of course!” I asked, “Did you eat food during the past three days?” Again they said, “Of course.” 

I said, “I have two-and-a-half minutes left. Next question: Do you LOVE being Jewish?” They all said, “Of course.” I requested, “Please tell me something you did that was uniquely Jewish in the past three days; but you can’t say you were a good person, because being a good person isn’t uniquely Jewish!”

They stared at me like deer in the headlights. 

I said, “I have two minutes left. 

“I will offer you three options of Jewish mitzvot to do daily, or to contemplate doing. You can choose to do one, two or all three of them. Are you game?” Their eyes opened wide; they were willing to listen.

Mitzvah No. 1, I told them, is to say six words every day — in the morning when you arise and at night before you go to sleep: Shema Yisrael Adonai Eloheinu Adonai Echad. When you say it, please think, “I am proud to be a Jew, and I believe in God.” They smiled. It was easy.

Ready for choice No. 2? They were excited. Why not?

Mitzvah No. 2: “Do you give tzedakah every day?” I asked. They said, “No.” 

“Choose a jar,” I told them, “and at the end of the day, place your extra change in the jar. Simple! When it is full, donate it to a needy cause. How simple is that? A Jew is commanded to give tzedakah daily. It can happen in many ways, but this is a simple way of doing the mitzvah.”

They smiled and saw the simplicity of it.

I said, “Now, I have 45 seconds left.” 

Mitzvah No. 3: Marriage.

I told them, “You all love looking at guys and gals; and you all get gaga over them. ‘OMG, I want to marry you!’ ‘He is so cute!!!! OMG OMG!!!’ or ‘She is gorgeous. I must marry her.’ Soon you’ll go to college, and you will meet even more cute people. 

“Well, think about it: Do you want a cute person whose looks will change with time, or do you want a Jewish mother or father for your children?” Each teen actually responded that they want a Jewish spouse! So I asked them, “Why don’t you make that a priority now in your life — make it a goal to only marry a Jew?” They all smiled, shaking their heads in agreement.

I told them that my three minutes were up, and I asked if I could have one more minute. Each group agreed.

I asked them to please choose mitzvah No. 1, No. 2 or No. 3. Or two of the three, or all three. Keep doing them forever as the foundation of doing something Jewish every day. 

“Please do not tell me what you choose,” I said. “It is between you and God.” 

I then made a suggestion: “Why not go up to the ark, and let God know of your choice of the mitzvah(s) you wish to offer Him? Ask God for His blessings so that you can fulfill them.”

Every teen — the boys and the girls — walked up to the ark and spent a few minutes whispering to their Creator. My congregants had no clue what was happening; they just saw Jewish teens walking up to the ark and then walking away with a glowing smile. 

The great Jewish-American novelist Herman Wouk asked the Lubavitcher Rebbe in the 1950s, “Do you really believe that you can tell young American Jews what to do?” The Rebbe responded that you can’t tell American youth what to do, but you can explain why to do everything.

I took the opportunity to explain to these amazing Jewish teens the whys and the importance of doing these three Jewish miztvot daily. They loved it! It wasn’t heavy Judaism; they were baby steps toward loving Judaism.

This week we read in the Torah the holy She-ma. It says: You shall love God your Lord. … You shall teach your children. … You shall wear tefillin … and have mezuzot.

God tells us, if you really love God, you will teach Judaism to your children. This education must come by living it. Judaism isn’t a subject; it is a way of life.

Is it difficult to inspire the next generations to live Jewishly? 

The good news: The future looks bright. All over the United States, many Jews are going to their local Chabad centers. The spark of Judaism is growing in Jews of all ages. Today, many Jews are craving their Jewish connection to God. They want authentic reasoning with real excitement. They want living examples of what is being taught to them. 

How about you? Are you happy with where you are standing within your Judaism? If so, that’s fantastic. But if you need a jumpstart, then contact me — I’d be happy to help you fire up your Jewish soul! Your children are watching you for their direction on how to live a Jewish life. 

Rabbi Chaim Mentz is director of Chabad of Bel Air.

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