The Real Housewives of NYC Need to be Cancelled

After what seems likes years in St. Barts, the women are finally back in NYC and able to continue hating each other.  It’s nice to get a break from the rat race and hate in a new location, but true hate can only really be enjoyed at home.   I said I would not blog this garbage anymore but here I am, with a bottle of wine, and a keyboard calling out my name.

The hating starts at a dinner party where the men are going to cook for the ladies.  Luann lets us know she has told Jacques about what happened on holiday to assure him everything is fine.  Really?  How do you assure someone that you had sex with a man whore and he does not need to worry about it? Did she give him a golden map to the free clinic?

Ramona and Sonja are hating on Aviva, and frankly, they are right. Aviva was horrific on the trip and she should have stayed home, perhaps spending time with her therapist.  Ramona is telling us she is warm and fuzzy, while Luann is looking at her, not understanding what she is saying.  It is as if she was speaking French. (Think about that for a minute.  Funny!)

Heather is out for drinks with Carole and I am digging me some Heather, which is really weird since I only just started to like her.  She may be the only normal person on the show. Carole, who I really loved in the beginning, has become quite annoying.   Carole and Heather get to talking to about being Jewish and the whole thing pisses me off.

Sidebar:  In the Jewish faith, the religion is passed on by the mother to the child.  If the mother is not Jewish, she can raise her children with the Jewish faith, but those kids will not be considered Jewish and would need to go through a conversion in order to marry in a religious ceremony.  It’s not a big deal, and God bless Heather for doing this for her husband.

However, just to clarify, she is not Jewish, she did not convert, and while her children are being raised Jewish, they are in fact, not Jewish.  I only make a point of it here because I write a lot about interfaith marriage, and religion in my Keeping the Faith blog, and it annoys me when these women who are not Jewish, say silly things about Judaism.

Heather and Carole get wasted in a gay bar drinking shots and profess their love for each other.   Well, Heather tells Carole that she loves her and that she is her best friend, while Carole tells us they got closer.  These relationships are beyond fake, all for show, and I cannot imagine any of them even speak when the cameras are not rolling.

Heather is now having lunch with Luann, in a completely empty restaurant, which means they are having lunch at 3:30 in the morning.  To clarify, when Lu arrives they are the only people there, then, as if by magic, the restaurant is full when they eat.  It’s all sooooo fake.  Heather and Luann appear to be looking at a script, which made me laugh out loud.

Luann talks about the fact that she is trying IVF and I want to hit her.  She has no idea what she is talking about and has a blasé tone about it, which is offensive to any woman who has ever struggled with trying to have a baby. Luann needs to spread her poached eggs on toast and shut the hell up about having a baby.  Heather knows she is full of crap.

Cut to Heather, Aviva and Carole now having dinner.  Really?  Heather was pissed off she took a week away from her family and business, but it would appear she never spends time at home and is always out with the girls.  I am once again mortified by the fact that Bravo thinks we are all stupid.  This show is written, poorly, and I am on glass number 2 or Merlot.

Aviva immediately bashes Ramona and Sonja, and is again talking about her phobias.  ENOUGH AVIVA.  ENOUGH ALREADY.  Heather stands up for Sonja and tells Aviva that she needs to separate Sonja from Ramona and not lump them together.  Aviva would be doing herself a favor to just stop talking.  She is a nightmare and should be fired.

Sonja and Carole go shopping and Carole lets us know she is not really into Sonja, but is concerned and wants to lend an ear.  To clarify, she is concerned about the fact Sonja seems to be an alcoholic with whore-like tendencies.  Sonja takes Carole to see a guy she went on a date with and it’s awkward.  I hate this show.  Dear Lord, I really hate it.

Carole and Sonja are now rehashing the trip and I’m not listening.  Do we really need to hear everyone say the same thing over and over again?  It’s just too much, then gets worse.  Aviva is out with Heather again.  Really? Did they just spend 72 hours filming them going out to eat?  This show is officially the dumbest group of women on television.

We are hearing Aviva talk about the trip again.  It is an hour of recapping by the women about a trip that we hated watching the first time.  Why are they making us relive it all again?  Aviva thinks she was bullied and Heather could honestly care less.  Heather needs to leave this show before it sucks the life out of her, and it will.

Carole tells Aviva she started smoking and because the cigarettes are pink, they will not kill her.  Are they special breast cancer cigarettes?  Aviva is disgusted and thinks it will impact their relationship, and I think Carole is a moron.  Pink cigarettes give you cancer Carole.  Grow the hell up.  It’s not cute or funny. You smoke and smoking kills. Own it.

Ramona goes over to Sonja’s and they crawl into bed together.  We find out that Sonja is going to see her ex-husband for the first time in 6 years, and she is a mess.  Ramona is telling her to be positive and focus on their life together, and Sonja is talking about her hair, make-up, and how much boob to show.  Sonja is a seriously hot mess.

It is strange that she is going to see her ex for the first time in six years and her goal is for them to be friends again.  She is delusional, overly medicated, and rather than take it easy and relax, she goes to meet Aviva for a drink.  Dear Lord.  Please make my power go out, or perhaps let someone come by and break my television.  Help me God.

Aviva tells Sonja she loves her and Sonja tells her she does not want to be friends with someone like Aviva, and they need to just be civil for the show. Good for Sonja.  She is absolutely right.  Aviva was a bitch and thinks she can say sorry and it is all forgiven, but the words are already out there and you can’t take them back.  Aviva is an educated idiot.

Sonja tells Aviva she is unable to get over it and she is done.  Aviva then gets mean and essentially tells Sonja that she is falling apart.  It’s nasty next week. Sonja will continue to humiliate herself, and Aviva will get meaner.  This show is a mess and I want out.  Bravo needs to man up before it is too late, and help Sonja keep it real.