Manicures, Guns & Living Life Out Loud

I had an appointment to get my nails done yesterday.  I have been going to the same salon for years and my nail girl, Julie, is the best.  She makes my nails look beautiful and I won’t let anyone else do my manicures.  I really love her and she has become a friend of mine.  She is from Vietnam, absolutely beautiful, and is the mother of a gorgeous 14 year old daughter with a second baby on the way.  I look forward to spending time with her.

I was scheduled to see her after lunch but could not remember what time so I called the shop to confirm.  The owner told me that Julie had been off for the morning at a doctor’s appointment, and she was coming in to meet me for our appointment.  I let them know I could wait a day and she should not come in just for me.  I moved the appointment to this afternoon and they called Julie to tell her not to worry about coming in.

I went to my appointment this afternoon and when I got there a couple of the workers in the salon were being interviewed by police.  It turns out that yesterday, while I was supposed to be getting my nails done, the salon was robbed at gunpoint.  A couple came in and stole all the money from the salon, along with all the cell phones and wallets of everyone in the shop.  Julie ran up to hug me and thanked me for moving our appointment.

Nobody was hurt, and it turns out the couple has robbed a couple of other nail salons in the area.  I’m glad I was not there, happy my pregnant friend did not experience the robbery, and thankful that nobody was hurt.  They were all a little spooked, but the police were lovely and everything is going to be okay.  Important to note that in terms of the police being lovely, of course I meant smoking hot.  Yummy, yummy ding dong.

Having missed the robbery, I find myself with clarity today.  Life is short and you just never know what will happen to you in the course of any given day.  I want to live my life out loud.  I don’t want to be afraid, nervous, self conscious, or worried.  I want to be happy, free, aware, and grateful.  I want my son to look back on each day with a good memory, know that I love him with every part of me, and be proud to have me as his mother.

I want a relationship with my family and friends that is connected and joyous.  I don’t want to harbor resentment towards anyone.  I want to forgive those who I feel have hurt me, I want to embrace all the parts of me that I love, and change those that bother me.  I want a relationship with my romantic partner that is fulfilling in terms of love, emotion, sex and friendship.  I want it all.  I deserve it all.  I will value it all.

Life is short and we are in charge of how we live.  I must demand of myself that life be all I want it to be.  Only I can change things and instead of wondering when things are going to get better, I am simply going to make them better.  I feel blessed today.  Blessed to be a mother, daughter and friend.  I‘m not sure how long I will have this clarity, but when it gets blurred I am going to read this blog and get refocused.

I suppose one must reach a certain point of desperation to walk into a business with a gun and steal from people while scaring the crap out of them, so I wish peace to them.  I am a lucky girl and today I am not only counting my blessings but also plotting change.  I want to live to the fullest and it is going to start today.  I am in charge of my life and everything is possible if I demand more of myself and always remember to keep the faith.